FabSwingers.com forum: Am I doing something wrong?

By *hatToDo OP Man
4 weeks ago

Belfast

Why do people never seem to answer my messages? Is it because there’s no creativity in my opener or literally just because I’m a man?

I’m not looking for pity and really trying not to come across as desperate, speaking from a curious point of view

Thanks

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
4 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

We don't know what you're doing OP.

What do you think you're doing right? 💜

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *osephSamuel90Man
4 weeks ago

Warfield

"Why do people never seem to answer my messages? Is it because there’s no creativity in my opener or literally just because I’m a man?

I’m not looking for pity and really trying not to come across as desperate, speaking from a curious point of view

Thanks"

Think its just as guys we don't appreciate that from the woman we're messagings perspective we're just one of hundreds of messages they're skimming through. Don't think it's anything personal

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *urves and HeelsWoman
4 weeks ago

Dumbarton

Speaking personally there no exact science. We ladies get tons of messages so it can be something simple that catches my eye or can just depend on my mood xx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *partharmonyCouple
4 weeks ago

Ruislip

"Why do people never seem to answer my messages? Is it because there’s no creativity in my opener or literally just because I’m a man?

I’m not looking for pity and really trying not to come across as desperate, speaking from a curious point of view

Thanks"

Just because you think a message is good, it doesn't mean that's what the recipient thinks. Most of the messages we received are dreadful but somebody thought each of them was worth sending.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iss.BellaWoman
4 weeks ago

"Why do people never seem to answer my messages? Is it because there’s no creativity in my opener or literally just because I’m a man?

I’m not looking for pity and really trying not to come across as desperate, speaking from a curious point of view

Thanks

Think its just as guys we don't appreciate that from the woman we're messagings perspective we're just one of hundreds of messages they're skimming through. Don't think it's anything personal"

Spot on 🎯

Plus, not everyone likes dick pics. Could you not take a torso pic?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *pontaneous_coupleCouple
4 weeks ago

Hoddesdon

Men don’t seem to get half as much attention on here compared to couples and women, women get swamped and couples do relatively well depending on their profile x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *osephSamuel90Man
4 weeks ago

Warfield

"Why do people never seem to answer my messages? Is it because there’s no creativity in my opener or literally just because I’m a man?

I’m not looking for pity and really trying not to come across as desperate, speaking from a curious point of view

Thanks

Think its just as guys we don't appreciate that from the woman we're messagings perspective we're just one of hundreds of messages they're skimming through. Don't think it's anything personal

Spot on 🎯

Plus, not everyone likes dick pics. Could you not take a torso pic?

Me personally or guys in general?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hatToDo OP Man
4 weeks ago

Belfast

"Why do people never seem to answer my messages? Is it because there’s no creativity in my opener or literally just because I’m a man?

I’m not looking for pity and really trying not to come across as desperate, speaking from a curious point of view

Thanks

Think its just as guys we don't appreciate that from the woman we're messagings perspective we're just one of hundreds of messages they're skimming through. Don't think it's anything personal

Spot on 🎯

Plus, not everyone likes dick pics. Could you not take a torso pic?

I don’t even have a dick pic saved on my account (I know what I do have isn’t brilliant either in fairness)

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
4 weeks ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"Why do people never seem to answer my messages? Is it because there’s no creativity in my opener or literally just because I’m a man?

I’m not looking for pity and really trying not to come across as desperate, speaking from a curious point of view

Thanks"

This post contains more words than your profile.

Regardless of what's in a message, if someone looks at you before opening it then there's a chance they never will.

Profile content is far more important than message content. 🤷‍♂️

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
4 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

No, it's not just because you're a man 💜

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hickthighs25Woman
4 weeks ago

Stockton

You only joined 3 weeks ago OP give it time and patience, learn a bit more of what your looking for and incorporate it into your profile.

The higher ratio of single men to women can prove problematic but it will happen.

One persons coal is another persons treasure we cant be everyones type or it would be boring as long as you show who you are and what you want/experience you can offer the right match will respond.

😘

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
4 weeks ago

little house on the praire

A good profile and decent pictures go along way

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iss.BellaWoman
4 weeks ago

"Why do people never seem to answer my messages? Is it because there’s no creativity in my opener or literally just because I’m a man?

I’m not looking for pity and really trying not to come across as desperate, speaking from a curious point of view

Thanks

Think its just as guys we don't appreciate that from the woman we're messagings perspective we're just one of hundreds of messages they're skimming through. Don't think it's anything personal

Spot on 🎯

Plus, not everyone likes dick pics. Could you not take a torso pic?

Me personally or guys in general?"

Sorry, thought you were OP 🤦‍♀️🤣

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ortney FoxxxWoman
4 weeks ago

honeysuckle lane

"Why do people never seem to answer my messages? Is it because there’s no creativity in my opener or literally just because I’m a man?

I’m not looking for pity and really trying not to come across as desperate, speaking from a curious point of view

Thanks"
perhaps the person your messaging isn’t looking for anything off here there just on here to see what’s happening in the club or what parties are coming up & to use the forums 🤷🏻‍♀️

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *agic.MMan
4 weeks ago

Orpington

"A good profile and decent pictures go along way"

This 👆...your profile will be more important than any message you send

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
4 weeks ago

little house on the praire

you still haven't taken advice

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ellhungvweMan
4 weeks ago

Cheltenham

"you still haven't taken advice"

A tale as old as the forums.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ndybykerMan
4 weeks ago

newcastle

Ive been on here for weeks now and now luck.can you even see my messages? Thanks

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *allySlinkyWoman
4 weeks ago

Leeds

"Ive been on here for weeks now and now luck.can you even see my messages? Thanks"

I can see your post but I can't see any sort of profile pic.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ichaelangelaCouple
4 weeks ago

notts

The problem is. Loads of men join thinking it’s full of desperate women.

Well sorry it isn’t. Don’t confuse swinging with instashag

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ophieslutTV/TS
4 weeks ago

Central

You've only been here 3 weeks, which limits you.

People only reply if you're interesting to them - as most people are not mutually compatible, you will generally get dead ends. Being new, you will get more of them proportionally, as people prefer those with reliability and a track record.

Over time, the weakest are filtered out and others up their game, adapting, adding better photos, etc

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lashman the ThirdMan
4 weeks ago

Leeds

What is your profile pic OP?

Tell us more about yourself.

Be cheeky and charming, show some identity and some colour.

It really doesn’t hurt to do a few push-ups either my friend. Or just work in your torso poses a little.

You are probably a pleasant chap with lots of interesting idiosyncrasies, however we wouldn’t know that from your profile 🤷‍♂️

It’s all a bit flat OP, but you’ll get there in time my friend 👍

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittlebirdWoman
4 weeks ago

The Big Smoke

"Ive been on here for weeks now and now luck.can you even see my messages? Thanks"

You don’t have a profile pic set

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittlebirdWoman
4 weeks ago

The Big Smoke

"Why do people never seem to answer my messages? Is it because there’s no creativity in my opener or literally just because I’m a man?

I’m not looking for pity and really trying not to come across as desperate, speaking from a curious point of view

Thanks"

OP. Put some thought into your profile. Your pics. Your likes, dislikes. What you’re looking for. What you bring to the party. Search in the forum for the 100s of threads like this and you will see the exact same advice given. Your profile is your shop window. Make it a reflection of you. Hope this helps 🌈

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he Silver FuxMan
4 weeks ago

Uttoxeter

A spectacularly mundane profile… minimum effort, complete lack of imagination, nil awareness of target audience, zero creativity…

Tell me OP, what did you think would happen with your minimal investment?

Lots of horny women, immediately flooding your inbox?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *Hudson45Man
4 weeks ago

Manchester

Just because you’re a man here , among a sea of about 20,000 blokes to 5k women maybe… the ratio is insane….

I’ve sent over 500 messages easily , and in the last 6 months heard back and met up with one person. ONE. It’s absurd lol but life

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
4 weeks ago

Crumpet Castle

Hello O.P.

Yes.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *Hudson45Man
4 weeks ago

Manchester

Also , everyone else is right , spice up your profile a little dude!! All you can do is try and put effort in!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
4 weeks ago

Leeds

Ok, so I get a message & look at the profile, are we compatible? Yes - reply, no - don't, cant tell - don't, can't see enough - don't, dick pic in message/overly sexual - also no reply.

Mrs

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
4 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

"Just because you’re a man here , among a sea of about 20,000 blokes to 5k women maybe… the ratio is insane….

I’ve sent over 500 messages easily , and in the last 6 months heard back and met up with one person. ONE. It’s absurd lol but life "

You managed to find 500 people that you were attracted to, who's preferences you fit, within a suitable distance in just six months?

I should work harder. I don't think I've ever found that many people viable in my entire life 💜

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *Hudson45Man
4 weeks ago

Manchester

Yeah believe it or not… men have to quite abit of outreach on here….

I love the assumptions too lol. That’s all us men wanna do after all huh? Just fuck fuck fuck!!! 🤣

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *Clem-Fandango-Woman
4 weeks ago

Yarm

Honestly, for me I get hundreds of messages and that is with the filters on.

I realise it's boring as hell to read every profile you are messaging however I don't reply to someone if they clearly haven't read my profile.

Maybe I'm fussy/impatient.

Messages that stand out to me are people who type something referring to my profile/pics. Not something that's been copy and pasted to everyone.

For me, I'm sick of seeing dicks. So if they send a dick pic it's instantly in the bin.

I also absolutely hate it when someone writes what they want to do to me, because it's most likely not me they are interested in at all.

Waffling on a bit but basically, he respectful and make it personal. Take the time to read someone's profile.

You probably are doing all that though ...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iking_WitchWoman
4 weeks ago

Hinckley

"Why do people never seem to answer my messages? Is it because there’s no creativity in my opener or literally just because I’m a man?

I’m not looking for pity and really trying not to come across as desperate, speaking from a curious point of view

Thanks"

You're not doing anything wrong in the composition of your profile but the 'guy seeks sex with woman who wants sex with a guy, not much to say here my title says it all' approach isn't really imaginative or enticing.

It's quite boring, it is very overdone and it doesn't make you stand out and most women would like more of your personality to show through.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *antsOffMan
4 weeks ago

Cambs

I don't think it's you in general matey.

Women get bombarded with messages because there are more men than women ratio.

If someone is online then you might get a better chance.

I'm new and have had replies back.some positive and some negative.

Why not head to the chat rooms. That way you get noticed more as I experienced.

It's not you, womne are overwhelmed and over loaded so at times they have to mass delete to keep up and cope.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittleBoPeepingWoman
4 weeks ago

Galway, Clare

"Why do people never seem to answer my messages? Is it because there’s no creativity in my opener or literally just because I’m a man?

I’m not looking for pity and really trying not to come across as desperate, speaking from a curious point of view

Thanks

Just because you think a message is good, it doesn't mean that's what the recipient thinks. Most of the messages we received are dreadful but somebody thought each of them was worth sending. "

Oh sooo much this!!

The fact guys think we should be replying to a message with literally just one word in it is beyond me (I'm saying you do this OP.. but a LOT of men do!!)

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
4 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

"Yeah believe it or not… men have to quite abit of outreach on here….

I love the assumptions too lol. That’s all us men wanna do after all huh? Just fuck fuck fuck!!! 🤣"

What assumptions?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *orcsmatMan
4 weeks ago

Kidderminster

Try putting a more effort into your profile.

It works.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *Hudson45Man
4 weeks ago

Manchester

Try using that half a brain you have to work it out!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
4 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

"Try using that half a brain you have to work it out! "

You said you'd messaged 500 people. I said I was surprised you'd found that many you wanted to message.

I assume there's some assumptions about the assumptions I made then? 💜

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *arlo56Man
4 weeks ago

Newcastle

I wouldn't worry about it op.

It's just the nature of the beast that is FAB.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
4 weeks ago

little house on the praire

2 days later and still no change

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *artis66Man
4 weeks ago

leeds

Some really good advice here!

Like the coal analogy x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inchestersBitchWoman
4 weeks ago

land of overweight munters

"Ive been on here for weeks now and now luck.can you even see my messages? Thanks"

Who would the people you send messages respond to? It's a blank profile

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inchestersBitchWoman
4 weeks ago

land of overweight munters

"Ive been on here for weeks now and now luck.can you even see my messages? Thanks

Who would the people you send messages respond to? It's a blank profile "

And you've been here more than a year not weeks

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inchestersBitchWoman
4 weeks ago

land of overweight munters

"Why do people never seem to answer my messages? Is it because there’s no creativity in my opener or literally just because I’m a man?

I’m not looking for pity and really trying not to come across as desperate, speaking from a curious point of view

Thanks"

It's because there's no creativity

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inAndTonic21Couple
4 weeks ago

Merseyside

Personally OP I would look at your content - even simple things like you would meet 18 to 99 year olds, would you really meet that range? Best advice we received was put likes dislikes what you are looking for etc issue for me is you can’t accommodate but no explanation why eg live with a housemate or relative so people may assume you are cheating. Hope this helps

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread