FabSwingers.com forum: Need advice on becoming a knobhead

By (user no longer on site) OP
47 weeks ago

I'm a nice person and I want to be turned. I think starting with knobhead level is adequate for now.

I've been told being a knobhead on here will certainly help my chances of standing out.

So what advice can you tell me fellow knobheads😙😜

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By (user no longer on site)
47 weeks ago

Start cutting and pasting messages to everyone saying

"Are you free now? FAF? and do you like anal?"

and then when you either don't get a reply or get a "no" send some mild abuse

That should get you to knobhead level quite easily

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By (user no longer on site)
47 weeks ago

How long have you got?

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By *oeBeansMan
47 weeks ago

Derby

Simply ignore the voice that says "no, you can't say that" and just do it. It's rather liberating 😅

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
47 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania

I'm afraid I don't think you have it in you to be a knobhead, OP. 🤗

A slightlycrankyhead, possibly, but never a knobhead.

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By (user no longer on site)
47 weeks ago

Send dick pics without any introduction

Kick off when you don't get a reply

Definitely delete all the about you on your profile

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By *inky PerkyCouple
47 weeks ago

Narnia

Excellent choice, Madam.

Our entry level Knobhead service entails sending messages to 300 people a day which all say "hey". It's a cost effective approach.

For an additional cost, we can also send 300 messages to complete strangers which all invited some form of unsolicited sexting. Each one comes with a free dic pic.

Poor grammar and spelling can be added and are charged by the letter.

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By (user no longer on site)
47 weeks ago

"I'm a nice person and I want to be turned. I think starting with knobhead level is adequate for now.

I've been told being a knobhead on here will certainly help my chances of standing out.

So what advice can you tell me fellow knobheads😙😜"

Advice?! I wrote a whole book! I’m an expert OP🤭

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By (user no longer on site)
47 weeks ago

'Meet now' is a good opening message to show an advanced level of knobheadness

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By *estructionDollyWoman
47 weeks ago

Manchester

Start posting in the politics and virus forums

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By *quirrel!Man
47 weeks ago

London

"I'm a nice person and I want to be turned. I think starting with knobhead level is adequate for now.

I've been told being a knobhead on here will certainly help my chances of standing out.

So what advice can you tell me fellow knobheads😙😜"

Think with your nob and not your head.

Write on everyone’s forum post like your post is the only one that matters.

Send dick pics in first message.

Don’t read anything properly before considering anything.

Give bad advice.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
47 weeks ago

"Send dick pics without any introduction

Kick off when you don't get a reply

Definitely delete all the about you on your profile

If I had a dick I could send but alas I wasn't born with that useless piece of skin.....

Oh God I have a lot to learn to become a knobhead haven't i

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By *anchesterTaurusMan
47 weeks ago

Prestwich

It's easy, just become a Liverpool fan

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By (user no longer on site)
47 weeks ago

Just send loads of messages saying "fuck now" and when they dont answer just shot in a "slag" for good measure 🤣

Always a good start.

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By (user no longer on site)
47 weeks ago

Arrange a meet...date, time, location. Sound really enthusiastic about seeing the other person, telling them what you'll do with them after you've had a medium Americano and slice of lemon drizzle cake. Then don't show up. Knobhead status achieved.

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By *ampireLoveMan
47 weeks ago

Essex

Strap a dildo to your head and have that as your profile picture. Knobhead achieved and your profile will stand out. Job done x

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By *hristopherd999Man
47 weeks ago

Brentwood

Send message 'Wanna fuck'

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By (user no longer on site)
47 weeks ago

Send a message then ? then ?? then ???

Give it about a minute between each.

Finish with a bit of abuse.

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By (user no longer on site)
47 weeks ago

"Just send loads of messages saying "fuck now" and when they dont answer just shot in a "slag" for good measure 🤣

Always a good start."

I’m howling🤣🤣

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
47 weeks ago

Leeds

Go out with my husband, he could turn anyone 😂😂

We seem to balance each other out well with my nice people pleasing and his cuntish attitude.

Mrs

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
47 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania

"Start posting in the politics and virus forums

For extra points, post inflammatory politics and virus forum-appropriate posts in the Lounge.

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By (user no longer on site)
47 weeks ago

"Just send loads of messages saying "fuck now" and when they dont answer just shot in a "slag" for good measure 🤣

Always a good start.

I’m howling🤣🤣"

You know i bet 🤣🤣🤣

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By *ansoffateMan
47 weeks ago

Sagittarius A

If you spend all your time trying not to be a knobhead by other people's standards then there'll still be people who think you're a knobhead for doing that.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
47 weeks ago

"Strap a dildo to your head and have that as your profile picture. Knobhead achieved and your profile will stand out. Job done x"

What was that you said....😄

Do you like my new profile pic

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By *bi HaiveMan
47 weeks ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

You need to learn to become a knobstacle.

"A person who consistently gets in the way, either through incompetence, arrogance or unhelpful behaviour and who makes situations more difficult than they need to be." 😇😇

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By *ansoffateMan
47 weeks ago

Sagittarius A

"You need to learn to become a knobstacle.

"A person who consistently gets in the way, either through incompetence, arrogance or unhelpful behaviour and who makes situations more difficult than they need to be." 😇😇"

I think that's called Customer Service isn't it?

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By (user no longer on site)
47 weeks ago

Send messages that simply say “Postcode?”

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By *ampireLoveMan
47 weeks ago

Essex

"Strap a dildo to your head and have that as your profile picture. Knobhead achieved and your profile will stand out. Job done x

What was that you said....😄

Do you like my new profile pic"

🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂 absolutely brilliant!!!! Xx

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
47 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania

"Strap a dildo to your head and have that as your profile picture. Knobhead achieved and your profile will stand out. Job done x

What was that you said....😄

Do you like my new profile pic"

Hey presto! Just like that, you're a knobhead!

🤣

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By *uvs2watchherCouple
47 weeks ago

newcastle

Jesus's what a random post. Really? To be fair I think a lot of men take us for granted just because we are on here xxx

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By *ansoffateMan
47 weeks ago

Sagittarius A

"Strap a dildo to your head and have that as your profile picture. Knobhead achieved and your profile will stand out. Job done x

What was that you said....😄

Do you like my new profile pic

Hey presto! Just like that, you're a knobhead!

🤣"

There it was all along staring us right in the face. Wood for the trees.

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By *parkle1974Woman
47 weeks ago

Leeds

If I had a dick I could send but alas I wasn't born with that useless piece of skin.....

That's a knobhead thing to call a man....they aren't all useless 🤣🤣🤣

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By *inceIlkestonMan
47 weeks ago

Ilkeston

There easily spotted when their status says, "run out of messages"

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By *carlettsWoman
47 weeks ago

Harpenden

Starter guide to knobhead level...send messages that just say fuck now! Or your the most beautiful woman on here

Don't wait for your messages to be read just send more messages with ???? Again and again

Get stroppy if you get rejected and throw your toys out of your pram. Then send another message saying you're fat, ugly etc then block said person so they can't even respond

Add photos of your knob next to a can, energy drink or a remote control.

Knobhead level achieved!! Collect gold star

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By *carlettsWoman
47 weeks ago

Harpenden

"Jesus's what a random post. Really? To be fair I think a lot of men take us for granted just because we are on here xxx"

This post I understand though, you found your bike yet?

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By *ewbootsandpanties99Man
47 weeks ago

Darkest South East Surrey

Don't forget to mention Sydney University.

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By *olyGlamorousWoman
47 weeks ago

Chester

If who ever you're messaging doesn't message you straight back when it says they're 'online' send 2 or 3 follow up messages asking what you did to offend them, then hurl abuse at them. Make sure you have a few abusive comments in a note ready to cut and paste for ease

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By (user no longer on site)
47 weeks ago

First of all you want to start threads every day and you want to try to not reply to every single person.

Also make friends on the forums so people think you’re in a C word.

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By *olyGlamorousWoman
47 weeks ago

Chester

"First of all you want to start threads every day and you want to try to not reply to every single person.

Also make friends on the forums so people think you’re in a C word. "

I've made lots of friends from forums am I interim level knobhead? 🤔 I hope so!

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By *hat.coupleCouple
47 weeks ago

Kent

Don't forget the black silhouette for your profile picture. And say things like "I don't bite, unless you ask nicely"

Mrs x

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By *erry 58Man
47 weeks ago

doncaster

Go to wetherspoons

Drink loads of cheap beer then find a bollard to put on your head and walk round town

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By *lym4realCouple
47 weeks ago

plymouth

Just send random messages asking if they want some fun with some handy nether region pics attached or better still just send a random friends invite or that you love their profile ??

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By *ittleMissCali_MrDJCouple
47 weeks ago

wonderland.

Send ‘U ok bbw’ to the first 100 profiles you see

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By *hunky GentMan
47 weeks ago

Bedford

Blue knickers is my advice.

It may not improve your dickhead status, but I'll be happier.

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By *hisIsMe58Man
47 weeks ago

Winchester

Firstly, before all else, set your profile pic to silhouette, remove all pics from your profile. Delete your bio and replace with "I'll fill in later".

Follow the advice given in this thread already and the start a new thread bemoaning the complete lack of interest in you and how everyone on here must be fake.

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By *ustus5555Woman
47 weeks ago

Nottingham

And don't forget, if you don't get a reply to send the same message again a week later. Continuation of this will get you promoted quickly to a higher level 👍

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By (user no longer on site) OP
47 weeks ago

"Jesus's what a random post. Really? To be fair I think a lot of men take us for granted just because we are on here xxx"

If I had achieved my knobhead status already I would have said please don't post till you've answered on your husbands thread

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By (user no longer on site) OP
47 weeks ago

"Jesus's what a random post. Really? To be fair I think a lot of men take us for granted just because we are on here xxx

If I had achieved my knobhead status already I would have said please don't post till you've answered on your husbands thread"

I meant boyfriends thread

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By *007ManMan
47 weeks ago

Worthing

Say you have been "on the telly".

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By *aizyWoman
47 weeks ago

west midlands

"Jesus's what a random post. Really? To be fair I think a lot of men take us for granted just because we are on here xxx

If I had achieved my knobhead status already I would have said please don't post till you've answered on your husbands thread

I meant boyfriends thread"

Was it the husband, the wife, the boyfriend or the exercise bike posting tho??🤔

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By *orny PTMan
47 weeks ago

Peterborough

Ask women how old and fat they are: surely they'll oblige and tell you how much they sweat on the dance floor too.

Sid The Sexist

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By *hortieWoman
47 weeks ago

Northampton

"Send dick pics without any introduction

Kick off when you don't get a reply

Definitely delete all the about you on your profile

You missed the silhouette profile pic... Rookie error.

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By (user no longer on site)
47 weeks ago

"First of all you want to start threads every day and you want to try to not reply to every single person.

Also make friends on the forums so people think you’re in a C word.

I've made lots of friends from forums am I interim level knobhead? 🤔 I hope so! "
are you in a cli… nvm

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By *uri00620Woman
47 weeks ago

Croydon

"Just send loads of messages saying "fuck now" and when they dont answer just shot in a "slag" for good measure 🤣

Always a good start."

This, and some kind of fat joke typically follows.

'I thought your type were meant to be funny'.

That kind of thing. You'll be more than adequately knobgead-ish then!

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By *umagain58Man
47 weeks ago

London

Well I have not seen before and that’s an interesting idea and different. All I say to do is say what you like or not and respect. The fun often follows. Good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
47 weeks ago

[Removed by poster at 29/05/25 18:49:47]

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By (user no longer on site)
47 weeks ago

"Just send loads of messages saying "fuck now" and when they dont answer just shot in a "slag" for good measure 🤣

Always a good start.

This, and some kind of fat joke typically follows.

'I thought your type were meant to be funny'.

That kind of thing. You'll be more than adequately knobgead-ish then!"

Agreed 🤣

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By *avie65Man
47 weeks ago

In the west.

Take a photo with you standing over the toilet, with the seat up.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
47 weeks ago

I wonder if everyone that's posted realises they called themselves knobheads😂

Maybe that's the trick

To not worry about it lol

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
47 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania

"I wonder if everyone that's posted realises they called themselves knobheads😂

Maybe that's the trick

To not worry about it lol"

I realised it, but I did it anyway. I know I'm not a knobhead, and that's what counts.

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By *rs GGWoman
47 weeks ago

Up North

This thread has not disappointed 🤣

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By *olyGlamorousWoman
47 weeks ago

Chester

"I wonder if everyone that's posted realises they called themselves knobheads😂

Maybe that's the trick

To not worry about it lol"

My name is PolyGlamorous and I'm a knobhead

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By (user no longer on site)
47 weeks ago

"I wonder if everyone that's posted realises they called themselves knobheads😂

Maybe that's the trick

To not worry about it lol"

I'm a knobhead, everyone knows I'm a knobhead, and I don't give a flying fuck about it 😁.

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By *olyGlamorousWoman
47 weeks ago

Chester

"I wonder if everyone that's posted realises they called themselves knobheads😂

Maybe that's the trick

To not worry about it lol

I'm a knobhead, everyone knows I'm a knobhead, and I don't give a flying fuck about it 😁."

Me need a 'I'm a knobhead n proud' thread

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By *abtastic Mr FoxMan
47 weeks ago

A den in the Glen

When you reach 'knobhead' level, come speak to me about 'bellend'. Two levels up and happy to part my wisdom.

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By *olyGlamorousWoman
47 weeks ago

Chester

We*

Oh I wish we could edit our posts 🙄

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By *olyGlamorousWoman
47 weeks ago

Chester

"When you reach 'knobhead' level, come speak to me about 'bellend'. Two levels up and happy to part my wisdom."

There's a level up from knobhead?! 😲 Is there a training course I can sign up for?

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By *abtastic Mr FoxMan
47 weeks ago

A den in the Glen

"When you reach 'knobhead' level, come speak to me about 'bellend'. Two levels up and happy to part my wisdom.

There's a level up from knobhead?! 😲 Is there a training course I can sign up for?

Knobhead is entry level stuff.

Throbber

Thundercunt

Mutant (said in Scottish accent only) are a few.

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By *olyGlamorousWoman
47 weeks ago

Chester

"When you reach 'knobhead' level, come speak to me about 'bellend'. Two levels up and happy to part my wisdom.

There's a level up from knobhead?! 😲 Is there a training course I can sign up for?

Knobhead is entry level stuff.

Throbber

Thundercunt

Mutant (said in Scottish accent only) are a few."

Do we get stickers too?!

I do like a sticker 😁

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By (user no longer on site) OP
47 weeks ago

"I wonder if everyone that's posted realises they called themselves knobheads😂

Maybe that's the trick

To not worry about it lol

I'm a knobhead, everyone knows I'm a knobhead, and I don't give a flying fuck about it 😁.

Me need a 'I'm a knobhead n proud' thread

Badges!

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By *ittlebirdWoman
47 weeks ago

The Big Smoke

I know loads OP. I’ll send them your way for tips 😘

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By (user no longer on site) OP
47 weeks ago

My inner knobhead is out in full, with a sprinkle of twat

Period pain brings out the twat ☹️

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