FabSwingers.com mobile

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Need advice on becoming a knobhead

Jump to newest
 

By *inchestersBitch OP   Woman
9 weeks ago

land of overweight munters

I'm a nice person and I want to be turned. I think starting with knobhead level is adequate for now.

I've been told being a knobhead on here will certainly help my chances of standing out.

So what advice can you tell me fellow knobheads😙😜

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
9 weeks ago

Start cutting and pasting messages to everyone saying

"Are you free now? FAF? and do you like anal?"

and then when you either don't get a reply or get a "no" send some mild abuse

That should get you to knobhead level quite easily

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
9 weeks ago

How long have you got?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oeBeansMan
9 weeks ago

Derby

Simply ignore the voice that says "no, you can't say that" and just do it. It's rather liberating 😅

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *avinaTVTV/TS
9 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania

I'm afraid I don't think you have it in you to be a knobhead, OP. 🤗

A slightlycrankyhead, possibly, but never a knobhead.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *andering Welsh GuyMan
9 weeks ago

All over the place

Send dick pics without any introduction

Kick off when you don't get a reply

Definitely delete all the about you on your profile

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inky PerkyCouple
9 weeks ago

Kingston

Excellent choice, Madam.

Our entry level Knobhead service entails sending messages to 300 people a day which all say "hey". It's a cost effective approach.

For an additional cost, we can also send 300 messages to complete strangers which all invited some form of unsolicited sexting. Each one comes with a free dic pic.

Poor grammar and spelling can be added and are charged by the letter.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
9 weeks ago


"I'm a nice person and I want to be turned. I think starting with knobhead level is adequate for now.

I've been told being a knobhead on here will certainly help my chances of standing out.

So what advice can you tell me fellow knobheads😙😜"

Advice?! I wrote a whole book! I’m an expert OP🤭

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uziTV69TV/TS
9 weeks ago

Newcastle

'Meet now' is a good opening message to show an advanced level of knobheadness

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *estructionDollyWoman
9 weeks ago

The Deep Dark Woods

Start posting in the politics and virus forums

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *quirrel!Man
9 weeks ago

L


"I'm a nice person and I want to be turned. I think starting with knobhead level is adequate for now.

I've been told being a knobhead on here will certainly help my chances of standing out.

So what advice can you tell me fellow knobheads😙😜"

Think with your nob and not your head.

Write on everyone’s forum post like your post is the only one that matters.

Send dick pics in first message.

Don’t read anything properly before considering anything.

Give bad advice.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inchestersBitch OP   Woman
9 weeks ago

land of overweight munters


"Send dick pics without any introduction

Kick off when you don't get a reply

Definitely delete all the about you on your profile

"

If I had a dick I could send but alas I wasn't born with that useless piece of skin.....

Oh God I have a lot to learn to become a knobhead haven't i

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *anchesterTaurusMan
9 weeks ago

Prestwich

It's easy, just become a Liverpool fan

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hickthighs25Woman
9 weeks ago

Stockton

Just send loads of messages saying "fuck now" and when they dont answer just shot in a "slag" for good measure 🤣

Always a good start.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
9 weeks ago

Arrange a meet...date, time, location. Sound really enthusiastic about seeing the other person, telling them what you'll do with them after you've had a medium Americano and slice of lemon drizzle cake. Then don't show up. Knobhead status achieved.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ampireLoveMan
9 weeks ago

Essex

Strap a dildo to your head and have that as your profile picture. Knobhead achieved and your profile will stand out. Job done x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hristopherd999Man
9 weeks ago

Brentwood

Send message 'Wanna fuck'

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lowupdollTV/TS
9 weeks ago

Herts/Beds/Leeds/London

Send a message then ? then ?? then ???

Give it about a minute between each.

Finish with a bit of abuse.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
9 weeks ago


"Just send loads of messages saying "fuck now" and when they dont answer just shot in a "slag" for good measure 🤣

Always a good start."

I’m howling🤣🤣

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
9 weeks ago

Leeds

Go out with my husband, he could turn anyone 😂😂

We seem to balance each other out well with my nice people pleasing and his cuntish attitude.

Mrs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *avinaTVTV/TS
9 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania


"Start posting in the politics and virus forums "

For extra points, post inflammatory politics and virus forum-appropriate posts in the Lounge.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hickthighs25Woman
9 weeks ago

Stockton


"Just send loads of messages saying "fuck now" and when they dont answer just shot in a "slag" for good measure 🤣

Always a good start.

I’m howling🤣🤣"

You know i bet 🤣🤣🤣

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ansoffateMan
9 weeks ago

Sagittarius A

If you spend all your time trying not to be a knobhead by other people's standards then there'll still be people who think you're a knobhead for doing that.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inchestersBitch OP   Woman
9 weeks ago

land of overweight munters


"Strap a dildo to your head and have that as your profile picture. Knobhead achieved and your profile will stand out. Job done x"

What was that you said....😄

Do you like my new profile pic

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod

9 weeks ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

You need to learn to become a knobstacle.

"A person who consistently gets in the way, either through incompetence, arrogance or unhelpful behaviour and who makes situations more difficult than they need to be." 😇😇

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ansoffateMan
9 weeks ago

Sagittarius A


"You need to learn to become a knobstacle.

"A person who consistently gets in the way, either through incompetence, arrogance or unhelpful behaviour and who makes situations more difficult than they need to be." 😇😇"

I think that's called Customer Service isn't it?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ongAndThick123Man
9 weeks ago

Shrewsbury

Send messages that simply say “Postcode?”

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ampireLoveMan
9 weeks ago

Essex


"Strap a dildo to your head and have that as your profile picture. Knobhead achieved and your profile will stand out. Job done x

What was that you said....😄

Do you like my new profile pic"

🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂 absolutely brilliant!!!! Xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *avinaTVTV/TS
9 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania


"Strap a dildo to your head and have that as your profile picture. Knobhead achieved and your profile will stand out. Job done x

What was that you said....😄

Do you like my new profile pic"

Hey presto! Just like that, you're a knobhead!

🤣

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uvs2watchherCouple
9 weeks ago

newcastle

Jesus's what a random post. Really? To be fair I think a lot of men take us for granted just because we are on here xxx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ansoffateMan
9 weeks ago

Sagittarius A


"Strap a dildo to your head and have that as your profile picture. Knobhead achieved and your profile will stand out. Job done x

What was that you said....😄

Do you like my new profile pic

Hey presto! Just like that, you're a knobhead!

🤣"

There it was all along staring us right in the face. Wood for the trees.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *parkle1974Woman
9 weeks ago

Leeds


"

If I had a dick I could send but alas I wasn't born with that useless piece of skin.....

"

That's a knobhead thing to call a man....they aren't all useless 🤣🤣🤣

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inceIlkestonMan
9 weeks ago

Ilkeston

There easily spotted when their status says, "run out of messages"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *carlettsWoman
9 weeks ago

Harpenden

Starter guide to knobhead level...send messages that just say fuck now! Or your the most beautiful woman on here

Don't wait for your messages to be read just send more messages with ???? Again and again

Get stroppy if you get rejected and throw your toys out of your pram. Then send another message saying you're fat, ugly etc then block said person so they can't even respond

Add photos of your knob next to a can, energy drink or a remote control.

Knobhead level achieved!! Collect gold star

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *carlettsWoman
9 weeks ago

Harpenden


"Jesus's what a random post. Really? To be fair I think a lot of men take us for granted just because we are on here xxx"

This post I understand though, you found your bike yet?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ewbootsandpanties99Man
9 weeks ago

Darkest South East Surrey

Don't forget to mention Sydney University.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *olyGlamorousWoman
9 weeks ago

Altrincham

If who ever you're messaging doesn't message you straight back when it says they're 'online' send 2 or 3 follow up messages asking what you did to offend them, then hurl abuse at them. Make sure you have a few abusive comments in a note ready to cut and paste for ease

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *sStephenPickleMan
9 weeks ago

Ends

First of all you want to start threads every day and you want to try to not reply to every single person.

Also make friends on the forums so people think you’re in a C word.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *olyGlamorousWoman
9 weeks ago

Altrincham


"First of all you want to start threads every day and you want to try to not reply to every single person.

Also make friends on the forums so people think you’re in a C word. "

I've made lots of friends from forums am I interim level knobhead? 🤔 I hope so!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hat.coupleCouple
9 weeks ago

Kent

Don't forget the black silhouette for your profile picture. And say things like "I don't bite, unless you ask nicely"

Mrs x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *erry bull1Man
9 weeks ago

doncaster

Go to wetherspoons

Drink loads of cheap beer then find a bollard to put on your head and walk round town

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lym4realCouple
9 weeks ago

plymouth

Just send random messages asking if they want some fun with some handy nether region pics attached or better still just send a random friends invite or that you love their profile ??

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ittleMissCali_MrDJCouple
9 weeks ago

wonderland.

Send ‘U ok bbw’ to the first 100 profiles you see

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hunky GentMan
9 weeks ago

Nottingham and Stamford

Blue knickers is my advice.

It may not improve your dickhead status, but I'll be happier.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hrills and adventureMan
9 weeks ago

Winchester

Firstly, before all else, set your profile pic to silhouette, remove all pics from your profile. Delete your bio and replace with "I'll fill in later".

Follow the advice given in this thread already and the start a new thread bemoaning the complete lack of interest in you and how everyone on here must be fake.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ustus5555Woman
9 weeks ago

Mansfield

And don't forget, if you don't get a reply to send the same message again a week later. Continuation of this will get you promoted quickly to a higher level 👍

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inchestersBitch OP   Woman
9 weeks ago

land of overweight munters


"Jesus's what a random post. Really? To be fair I think a lot of men take us for granted just because we are on here xxx"

If I had achieved my knobhead status already I would have said please don't post till you've answered on your husbands thread

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inchestersBitch OP   Woman
9 weeks ago

land of overweight munters


"Jesus's what a random post. Really? To be fair I think a lot of men take us for granted just because we are on here xxx

If I had achieved my knobhead status already I would have said please don't post till you've answered on your husbands thread"

I meant boyfriends thread

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *2000ManMan
9 weeks ago

Worthing

Say you have been "on the telly".

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *aizyWoman
9 weeks ago

west midlands


"Jesus's what a random post. Really? To be fair I think a lot of men take us for granted just because we are on here xxx

If I had achieved my knobhead status already I would have said please don't post till you've answered on your husbands thread

I meant boyfriends thread"

Was it the husband, the wife, the boyfriend or the exercise bike posting tho??🤔

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orny PTMan
9 weeks ago

Peterborough

Ask women how old and fat they are: surely they'll oblige and tell you how much they sweat on the dance floor too.

Sid The Sexist

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hortieWoman
9 weeks ago

Northampton


"Send dick pics without any introduction

Kick off when you don't get a reply

Definitely delete all the about you on your profile

"

You missed the silhouette profile pic... Rookie error.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *sStephenPickleMan
9 weeks ago

Ends


"First of all you want to start threads every day and you want to try to not reply to every single person.

Also make friends on the forums so people think you’re in a C word.

I've made lots of friends from forums am I interim level knobhead? 🤔 I hope so! "

are you in a cli… nvm

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uri00620Woman
9 weeks ago

Croydon


"Just send loads of messages saying "fuck now" and when they dont answer just shot in a "slag" for good measure 🤣

Always a good start."

This, and some kind of fat joke typically follows.

'I thought your type were meant to be funny'.

That kind of thing. You'll be more than adequately knobgead-ish then!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *umagain58Man
9 weeks ago

London

Well I have not seen before and that’s an interesting idea and different. All I say to do is say what you like or not and respect. The fun often follows. Good luck

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hickthighs25Woman
9 weeks ago

Stockton

[Removed by poster at 29/05/25 18:49:47]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hickthighs25Woman
9 weeks ago

Stockton


"Just send loads of messages saying "fuck now" and when they dont answer just shot in a "slag" for good measure 🤣

Always a good start.

This, and some kind of fat joke typically follows.

'I thought your type were meant to be funny'.

That kind of thing. You'll be more than adequately knobgead-ish then!"

Agreed 🤣

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *avie65Man
9 weeks ago

In the west.

Take a photo with you standing over the toilet, with the seat up.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inchestersBitch OP   Woman
9 weeks ago

land of overweight munters

I wonder if everyone that's posted realises they called themselves knobheads😂

Maybe that's the trick

To not worry about it lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *avinaTVTV/TS
9 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania


"I wonder if everyone that's posted realises they called themselves knobheads😂

Maybe that's the trick

To not worry about it lol"

I realised it, but I did it anyway. I know I'm not a knobhead, and that's what counts.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rs GGWoman
9 weeks ago

Up North

This thread has not disappointed 🤣

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *olyGlamorousWoman
9 weeks ago

Altrincham


"I wonder if everyone that's posted realises they called themselves knobheads😂

Maybe that's the trick

To not worry about it lol"

My name is PolyGlamorous and I'm a knobhead

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
9 weeks ago


"I wonder if everyone that's posted realises they called themselves knobheads😂

Maybe that's the trick

To not worry about it lol"

I'm a knobhead, everyone knows I'm a knobhead, and I don't give a flying fuck about it 😁.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *olyGlamorousWoman
9 weeks ago

Altrincham


"I wonder if everyone that's posted realises they called themselves knobheads😂

Maybe that's the trick

To not worry about it lol

I'm a knobhead, everyone knows I'm a knobhead, and I don't give a flying fuck about it 😁."

Me need a 'I'm a knobhead n proud' thread

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *abtastic Mr FoxMan
9 weeks ago

A den in the Glen

When you reach 'knobhead' level, come speak to me about 'bellend'. Two levels up and happy to part my wisdom.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *olyGlamorousWoman
9 weeks ago

Altrincham

We*

Oh I wish we could edit our posts 🙄

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *olyGlamorousWoman
9 weeks ago

Altrincham


"When you reach 'knobhead' level, come speak to me about 'bellend'. Two levels up and happy to part my wisdom."

There's a level up from knobhead?! 😲 Is there a training course I can sign up for?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *abtastic Mr FoxMan
9 weeks ago

A den in the Glen


"When you reach 'knobhead' level, come speak to me about 'bellend'. Two levels up and happy to part my wisdom.

There's a level up from knobhead?! 😲 Is there a training course I can sign up for? "

Knobhead is entry level stuff.

Throbber

Thundercunt

Mutant (said in Scottish accent only) are a few.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *olyGlamorousWoman
9 weeks ago

Altrincham


"When you reach 'knobhead' level, come speak to me about 'bellend'. Two levels up and happy to part my wisdom.

There's a level up from knobhead?! 😲 Is there a training course I can sign up for?

Knobhead is entry level stuff.

Throbber

Thundercunt

Mutant (said in Scottish accent only) are a few."

Do we get stickers too?!

I do like a sticker 😁

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inchestersBitch OP   Woman
9 weeks ago

land of overweight munters


"I wonder if everyone that's posted realises they called themselves knobheads😂

Maybe that's the trick

To not worry about it lol

I'm a knobhead, everyone knows I'm a knobhead, and I don't give a flying fuck about it 😁.

Me need a 'I'm a knobhead n proud' thread "

Badges!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ittlebirdWoman
9 weeks ago

The Big Smoke

I know loads OP. I’ll send them your way for tips 😘

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *inchestersBitch OP   Woman
9 weeks ago

land of overweight munters

My inner knobhead is out in full, with a sprinkle of twat

Period pain brings out the twat ☹️

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top