FabSwingers.com forum: BBQ Season

By *azzaahh OP Woman
over a year ago

north wales / chester

BBQ RULES

We are about to enter the summer and BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity, as it's the only type of cooking a 'real' man will do, probably because there is an element of danger involved.

When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:

Routine...

(1) The woman buys the food.

(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.

(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.

Here comes the important part:

(4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.

More routine....

(5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.

(6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he deals with the situation.

Important again:

(7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.

More routine....

(8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.

(9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.

And most important of all:

(10) Everyone PRAISES and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.

(11) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed 'her night off.' And, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women....

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I prefer to organise, prepare and cook my own food, BBQ as well as the side dishes and desserts.

I definitely do not want anyone else to flip my burgers or other items cooking on the BBQ, as I cannot rely on anyone not to burn my food.

I want my food to be recognisable when cooked, in terms of appearance and flavour, not blackened beyond recognition.

I am a self-styled BBQueen, and have an apron saying so.

By *azzaahh OP Woman
over a year ago

north wales / chester

"You have not been to one of my bbqs. I forbid anybody to tamper with the food...i spent a long time at the market selecting the perfecr cuts of meat and accompanying drinks. Then I spend hours prepping seasoning and marinating. I make all the side dishes during this time too. In the end...at my bbq...the woman does nothing but maybe prepare a desert. Rarity?"

Feel free to come demonmstrate your skills