FabSwingers.com forum: AITA

By *lackBachelor OP Man
17 weeks ago

Salisbury

Good morning all. Started chatting with a couple. Things were going alright but two things began to make me feel uncomfortable. 1. Any chat with the " alleged" wife was always infused heavily with her husbands role in the act she wanted to engage in. Now I understand it's different strokes and everyone is turned on by their specific kink. So not the part that really had me worried. It's 2. Where they ask for a nude, to some no big deal. I don't really like the idea, so I don't even ask myself. So to find a middle ground. I in turn ask if they could take a selfie, clothed and "no face" holding a spoon. And they went ballistic.

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By (user no longer on site)
17 weeks ago

I think everything you did there was perfectly reasonable

I’m always wary when couples approach me and there is no actual pics of the female partner

I have no issues playing with just the male

But then they get treated as a single male and not a couple

Just be honest

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By *anderingArtistMan
17 weeks ago

an abstract world

Nothing wrong with what you did OP. Perfectly reasonable request.

It seems as though they felt a sense of entitlement in their position and being asked to do that was taken as a disrespect.

Sometimes the best relationships are ones we avoid.

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By *abtastic Mr FoxMan
17 weeks ago

A den in the Glen

Schoolboy error op. Everyone knows it's taking a photo with your fingers crossed in the pic. Not the spoon.

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By *batMan
17 weeks ago

Alicante, Spain. (Sometimes in Wales)

Seems like your plan worked.

I was chatting to a couple for a while with a view to a meet but it got increasingly obvious I was only ever talking to the M. Which is fine if they’re both involved eventually. Then I got ghosted, but about a year later “they” contacted me again.

I asked them to send an up to date photo of them both, with either a note with my name on it or even just a local newspaper. He said “it’s starting to sound like a job interview!” I told them it was their choice whether they wanted to apply!

Honesty is important in swinging!!! And if you recognise yourself as the person I’m talking about in this post, have a long word with yourself!!!

Gbat

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By *batMan
17 weeks ago

Alicante, Spain. (Sometimes in Wales)

"Schoolboy error op. Everyone knows it's taking a photo with your fingers crossed in the pic. Not the spoon."

Or a pic “spooning.”

Gbat

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By *ittlemissFlirtyCouple
17 weeks ago

The bottom of the River Ankh

"Schoolboy error op. Everyone knows it's taking a photo with your fingers crossed in the pic. Not the spoon.

Or a pic “spooning.”

Gbat "

Or forking 🤣

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By *abtastic Mr FoxMan
17 weeks ago

A den in the Glen

"Schoolboy error op. Everyone knows it's taking a photo with your fingers crossed in the pic. Not the spoon.

Or a pic “spooning.”

Gbat

Or forking 🤣"

Let's not add 'knifing' eh

Good work OP. Called out a hoax there I think.

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
17 weeks ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"Good morning all. Started chatting with a couple. Things were going alright but two things began to make me feel uncomfortable. 1. Any chat with the " alleged" wife was always infused heavily with her husbands role in the act she wanted to engage in. Now I understand it's different strokes and everyone is turned on by their specific kink. So not the part that really had me worried. It's 2. Where they ask for a nude, to some no big deal. I don't really like the idea, so I don't even ask myself. So to find a middle ground. I in turn ask if they could take a selfie, clothed and "no face" holding a spoon. And they went ballistic."

Some people want to see nudes others don't. If you have some in your profile it's often not necessary to ask.

Since they went 'ballistic' at your request I'd guess that was because they were essentially being asked for a 'proof of life' photo to prove they were indeed a couple. If someone requested that on my couples profile it would kill the conversation dead, given there's plenty of us together and enough veris to confirm we exist. If you felt the need for this it kind of indicates to me you had suspicions. Personally if I wasn't 100% sure a couple was a couple I wouldn't even engage in conversation, as there no end of profiles that are obviously real.

People can and will make requests, have conversations that go in certain directions and as with all couples profiles you will never know who is typing any messages - one, the other or both.

We all have to use our judgement and make our own choices. They may not match those of others.

That just means you're incompatible, not that either of you is wrong. 🤷‍♂️

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By *ittlemissFlirtyCouple
17 weeks ago

The bottom of the River Ankh

"Schoolboy error op. Everyone knows it's taking a photo with your fingers crossed in the pic. Not the spoon.

Or a pic “spooning.”

Gbat

Or forking 🤣

Let's not add 'knifing' eh

Good work OP. Called out a hoax there I think."

That was a cutting remark 🤣

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By (user no longer on site)
17 weeks ago

Ahh a the old spoon u know they may have thought u was trying to stair up some trouble m8😬

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By (user no longer on site)
17 weeks ago

I'm sorry that was weak🤦‍♂️

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By (user no longer on site)
17 weeks ago

I'll just fork of to another thread Ha🤦‍♂️god I can't help myself

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By (user no longer on site)
17 weeks ago

See u all plater 😬🤣 i proper amusing myself here

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By *ittlemissFlirtyCouple
17 weeks ago

The bottom of the River Ankh

"See u all plater 😬🤣 i proper amusing myself here "

What a load of crock(ery) 🤣

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By (user no longer on site)
17 weeks ago

"See u all plater 😬🤣 i proper amusing myself here

What a load of crock(ery) 🤣"

🤣🤣🤣

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By *estructionDollyWoman
17 weeks ago

The Deep Dark Woods

I don't think you've been unreasonable, fab is full of fantasists and time wasters, and you should only do things you're comfortable with. I don't think it's unreasonable to ask someone for some sort of verification they are genuine before sending them any sort of nude!

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
17 weeks ago

Central

It's reasonable to ask for whatever gives you the confidence that people actually exist and are interested in actually meeting, rather than getting wank fodder.

If profiles are concerning, report to Admin

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