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"I stepped on my helmet getting out of the bath earlier and it's really sore. "Don't leave your headwear lying around, silly  | |||
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"That's nothing, was playing 5 a side yesterday and tripped over my balls.🤦♂️" Did the ref show you a 'Sore Card'? | |||
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"I stepped on my helmet getting out of the bath earlier and it's really sore.
Don't leave your headwear lying around, silly "Should have kept in on, you're right. A foolish mistake. | |||
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"One word Lego!" Oh fuck yes, that's evil stuff. And you never even see it hidden in the carpet and step on it full weight. (They knew what they created, sadists) | |||
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"I stepped on my helmet getting out of the bath earlier and it's really sore. "I'd say I'd kiss it better for you but then I could end up in trouble....... | |||
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"I stepped on my helmet getting out of the bath earlier and it's really sore.
Don't leave your headwear lying around, silly
Should have kept in on, you're right. A foolish mistake. "It might have filled with water, like an aquarium. Imagine your helmet with bits floating about! | |||
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"I do that with my nipples all the time. " Can I do it for you instead, just for variation sake? | |||
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"Kneeling on your nipples as you try to get back off your knees is super painful, men help the big boobies ladies up after they've had a gobble." That's a lot of men that can skip biceps day at the gym. | |||
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"Kneeling on your nipples as you try to get back off your knees is super painful, men help the big boobies ladies up after they've had a gobble. That's a lot of men that can skip biceps day at the gym. "Alot of men are needed to be able to help me up off the floor,  . Wow  | |||
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"I do that with my nipples all the time. Can I do it for you instead, just for variation sake? "If I'm allowed to tread on your helmet. | |||
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"I do that with my nipples all the time. Can I do it for you instead, just for variation sake?
If I'm allowed to tread on your helmet."Are you wearing stilettos with lacy stockings? | |||
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"This is probably to much info but being the fook wit I am I feel I need to share ...sometime ago in a life not of single guy at an attempt to shock and ultimately silence a woman I would take my trousers of a drag my ass across the carpet like a dog looking for a reaction of total disgust however one fatal day i had what I shall term as a traumatic experience in which my ass and a lego brick came into conflict.... never again did I behave in such foolhardy and dangerous manner ... Although i do still find hilarious when i see a dog do it ...." Well that's one way to stop your mum nagging you to tidy your room | |||
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"This is probably to much info but being the fook wit I am I feel I need to share ...sometime ago in a life not of single guy at an attempt to shock and ultimately silence a woman I would take my trousers of a drag my ass across the carpet like a dog looking for a reaction of total disgust however one fatal day i had what I shall term as a traumatic experience in which my ass and a lego brick came into conflict.... never again did I behave in such foolhardy and dangerous manner ... Although i do still find hilarious when i see a dog do it ...." You mongrel. | |||
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 this is the worlds smallest violin and I’m playing it just for you 🙌 | |||
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" this is the worlds smallest violin and I’m playing it just for you 🙌"Are you playing the 1st violin line to the Rach3 Piano Concerto orchestral intro? If you are. I'll jump out of the bath more often. | |||
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"Yes i am indeed a sick puppy "Get a Mistress. One who will drag you by the collar around your neck with her initials on it.... With a plush carpet lego kink. | |||
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"I stepped on my helmet getting out of the bath earlier and it's really sore. "You think you've got issues, I sat on a testicle earlier, it's really swollen!!😭😭 | |||
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"Yes i am indeed a sick puppy
Get a Mistress. One who will drag you by the collar around your neck with her initials on it.... With a plush carpet lego kink. "pmsl please don't give any of the complete wronguns on here any ideas Seb they are bad enough as it is .... and that's saying something coming from me | |||
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"Sympathy can be found in the dictionary between SHIT & SYPHILLIS" What word were you looking up? | |||
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"I do that with my nipples all the time. Can I do it for you instead, just for variation sake?
If I'm allowed to tread on your helmet.
Are you wearing stilettos with lacy stockings? "In the bath? Probably not. | |||
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"Yes i am indeed a sick puppy
Get a Mistress. One who will drag you by the collar around your neck with her initials on it.... With a plush carpet lego kink.
pmsl please don't give any of the complete wronguns on here any ideas Seb they are bad enough as it is .... and that's saying something coming from me "Mums the word.  | |||
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"I stepped on my helmet getting out of the bath earlier and it's really sore. "when you come in from work you should put your helmet under the bed and use it as a piss pot during the night if you need to pee,,, | |||
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"I stepped on my helmet getting out of the bath earlier and it's really sore. when you come in from work you should put your helmet under the bed and use it as a piss pot during the night if you need to pee,,, "That could be unpleasant if it was a d*unk emergency while sleeping. .... I'd I've forgotten come the morning then put it on..... | |||
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"This is probably to much info but being the fook wit I am I feel I need to share ...sometime ago in a life not of single guy at an attempt to shock and ultimately silence a woman I would take my trousers of a drag my ass across the carpet like a dog looking for a reaction of total disgust however one fatal day i had what I shall term as a traumatic experience in which my ass and a lego brick came into conflict.... never again did I behave in such foolhardy and dangerous manner ... Although i do still find hilarious when i see a dog do it .... Well that's one way to stop your mum nagging you to tidy your room "  am a good boy really ....sometimes | |||
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