FabSwingers.com forum: What’s the worst injury you ever sustained?

By *elix Sighted OP Man
7 days ago

Cloud 8

Extra points if it was doing something silly.

Extra extra points if it was doing something sexy.

Infinity+1 points for the winner.

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By *riar BelisseWoman
7 days ago

On Holibobs

Strectched my neck into a unnatural position when I landed inebriated on a bouncy castle...

Took 6 weeks to heal, the docs were extremely pissed with me as instead of going to a&e. I had a couple of paracetamol and carried on drinking

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By *ornycougaWoman
7 days ago

MADERIA Wherever I lay my hat

I dislocated my shoulder whacking an old CRT television in anger because the ariel was crap

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By *andadbodMan
7 days ago

Liverpool

I do jiu jitsu and years ago whilst grappling, we got into such a tight position, the pressure of the other guys belt knot cracked my rib 😳

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By *WBiOnlyCoupleCouple
7 days ago

St Helens

Mr reversed his car onto my foot, and stopped because he didn't realize what he'd done. Horrible 😂

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By *oughmanMan
7 days ago

Sunderland

Loosing a chunk of flesh from my ankle on a piece of glass sticking out of a bin bag.

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By *oeBeansMan
7 days ago

Derby

I've been lucky to not have any serious injuries. Worst is probably a dislocated finger when playing cricket, diving for the ball and it got jammed into the ground

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man
7 days ago

BRIDPORT

A broken heart🎻

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By *luebell888Woman
7 days ago

Glasgowish

Falling on ice and breaking my tailbone. Agony.

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By *ohn.Wick.Man
7 days ago

The Continental

I broke my ribs as a result of an overly excitable wank.

I deposited the goods to the floor, then promptly slipped on them, falling over the edge of the bathtub, and busting 3 ribs.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
7 days ago

Carlisle usually

When I was seven we were on our way to the only trip to Disney world in my life. Some jerk with a briefcase barged past me on the escalator when we landed in Florida and I fell and broke my leg. Spent most of the trip in hospital with no pain meds for days while they confirmed insurance, a lot of time in the hotel watching TV, and three days at the parks in a wheelchair not getting to go on most of the rides. Still got the scars on my knee from that escalator 💜

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By *ucka39Man
7 days ago

Newcastle

Pulled my spine from its socket whilst trying to loosen the wheel nuts on a truck. Pushing and pulling of the body doesn't go down well 😂 was able to put back in place by myself but painfully

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By *ittleBoPeepingWoman
7 days ago

Galway, Clare

"Mr reversed his car onto my foot, and stopped because he didn't realize what he'd done. Horrible 😂"
.

Oh sweet jesus

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By *dam1971Man
7 days ago

Bedford

I was in a huge car crash, the car rolled over, broken glass everywhere and I had a small cut on my finger. Not as bad as a paper cut, but it hurt for a couple of minutes.

Mental trauma from a previous relationship was much, much worse

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By *exyScientistsCouple
7 days ago

Castlebar

Never broken, dislocated or damaged anything so far...Never been to Casualty or hospital for myself (apart from having babies) touch wood it stays that way.

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By *ermite12ukMan
7 days ago

Solihull and Brentwood

Supported a box of screws on my side, while I was making room on a shelf to place the box. Between the resultant cracked rib and a much later grumbling appendix. Not too sure what was worse, pain wise.

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By *anonfire96Man
7 days ago

Mansfield

Dislocated my knee cap, well tore it off completely and put a linear fracture in my femur joint. Slipped off a small wall. In plaster for 13 weeks, now 20 years later waiting for a replacement.

Or spent 9 days on life support after getting campylobachter enchefalopothy from barbecued chicken. Two months in hospital.

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By *ormerWelshcouple2020Man
7 days ago

Stourbridge

"I've been lucky to not have any serious injuries. Worst is probably a dislocated finger when playing cricket, diving for the ball and it got jammed into the ground"

A regular occurrence! Same with broken fingers,dislocations (put back at the crease) broken collar bone ,all cricket, hit by a bat.

Broken neck sneezing and made tv and front page of the Sun.

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By *929Man
7 days ago

bedlington

Luckily Never had anything that bad

Worst was using the machine that snapped rebar and forgetting to move my finger, luckily the angle meant it cut lengthways down my finger rather than cutting it off, it’s now bent to the side but otherwise no lasting damage

Dumbest was breaking ribs stumbling d*unk down my mates garden steps and falling on my side onto the handrail

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By *utfit loverMan
7 days ago

st helens

Damaged knee ligaments slipping off a 3 inch step at haydock races

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By *xcalibur77Man
7 days ago

Adlington chorley

A javelin straight through my foot at sports day at school

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By *he ShivsCouple
7 days ago

Fife

I broke a rib opening the freezer drawer.

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By *ermite12ukMan
7 days ago

Solihull and Brentwood

"A javelin straight through my foot at sports day at school

Jesus's H Christ on a bike.

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By *he_turtle_movesMan
7 days ago

york

Simultaneously worst injury and most unlikely avoidance

Racing fixed gear bikes in London in a major race i took a corner too fast and hit a haybale. Catapulted over the handlebars at 32mph and landed right ontop of my head. Blacked out, concussion and broken hand.

Amazed I didn't break my neck once I saw the photos of me upside down

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By *idnightcowboy69Man
7 days ago

ciren

Sliced the end of my nose off in a motorcycle accident

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By *elix Sighted OP Man
7 days ago

Cloud 8

There have been some properly nasty injuries out there! I’d like to say the world is a dangerous place and I shan’t leave home, but so many happened indoors!

Despite your best efforts, everyone, leading so far is Mr J. Wick with his freak wanking injury. Every part of that makes me laugh.

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By *ell GwynnWoman
7 days ago

North Yorkshire

Errrm, a burn on my forearm from the oven? Or a secateur to my knuckle?

Considering the ridiculously risky things I did as a kid, and the two big car accidents I've been in, I'm surprised I've not had any fractures or dislocations.

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By *esYesOMGYes!Man
7 days ago

M20

"Falling on ice and breaking my tailbone. Agony. "

Fell out of a tree as a kid. Stopped by a branch, straddling it. My balls were fine but now I have a floating tail bone.

Been told it could cause me problems but none so far.

Have you had any issues?

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By *m1970Man
7 days ago

Glasgow

Kicked on the face by a high boot playing football and broke my jaw in two places. Waking up after the operation to set it is the most painful thing I’ve ever experienced

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By *HUSH-Man
7 days ago

London

I tore my left patella tendon when I was 19. It’s never properly healed and still gives me shit.

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By *ortyairCouple
7 days ago

Wallasey

Before we met, I must add, but my hubby dislocated the two middle fingers of his left hand, whilst fingerings one of this rugby mates aunties. Had to go A&E to sort it out.

The story is quite funny and he still gets stick about this to this day, 30 plus years later, when we go down the club.

Not the worst injury ever but definitely one of the funniest, made funnier because all his mates know about it... the idiot haha, Mrs x

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By *ornycougaWoman
7 days ago

MADERIA Wherever I lay my hat

"I broke my ribs as a result of an overly excitable wank.

I deposited the goods to the floor, then promptly slipped on them, falling over the edge of the bathtub, and busting 3 ribs."

I would love to have been a fly on the wall at A&E when you were asked what happened!

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By *ohn.Wick.Man
7 days ago

The Continental

"I broke my ribs as a result of an overly excitable wank.

I deposited the goods to the floor, then promptly slipped on them, falling over the edge of the bathtub, and busting 3 ribs.

I would love to have been a fly on the wall at A&E when you were asked what happened!

“I slipped on the soapy floor”

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By *usty kayCouple
7 days ago

Burnham

12 broken ribs, and punctured lungs.

Car crash, I was lucky

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By *ettpairCouple
7 days ago

Kettering

Broke my leg in several places...torn ligaments/tendons.... ankle broke and dislocated ( that bad my foot was facing behind me ) .....and a broken arm from a d*unken shopping trolley accident

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By *arriedminxCouple
7 days ago

leeds

Ruptured my Achilles tendon walking up steps! Never been the same since!

Minx.x

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By *oopy FroodMan
7 days ago

Orbiting Planet Rupert

I broke my nose when I walked into a wall with a hardon

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By *risscrossxMan
7 days ago

stourbridge

Broken collarbone coming off a BMX trying to be 12 again 😂 alcohol had been taken

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By *ortyairCouple
7 days ago

Wallasey

"I broke my nose when I walked into a wall with a hardon "
That made me titter. Mrs x

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By *oopy FroodMan
7 days ago

Orbiting Planet Rupert

"I broke my nose when I walked into a wall with a hardon That made me titter. Mrs x"

I was embarrassed

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By *ools and the brainCouple
7 days ago

couple, us we him her.

Blacked out running fell over hitting my head so hard I died and was fortunate that paramedics where sitting in their ambulance 20m from the incident, came back too on the back of the ambulance with no clue what had happened sat up and fought my way out totally ignoring them, ran a few metres up the road only for it to happen again hitting my head for a second time caused lifelong neurological issues and a complete personality change and lost empathy and some emotions , spiralled into depression and subsequently tried killing myself a couple of years later.

Yeah that wasn't great

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By *ealMissShadyWoman
7 days ago

St Albans/ Welsh Borders

Trimalleolar fracture, nearly lost my foot. Now it's full of plates and pins

I slipped on ice after being d*unk. I don't drink but my ex boss thought it would be funny to spike my drink with vodka...surgery and 2 months out of action and physiotherapy was a barrel of laughs

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By *luebell888Woman
7 days ago

Glasgowish

"Falling on ice and breaking my tailbone. Agony.

Fell out of a tree as a kid. Stopped by a branch, straddling it. My balls were fine but now I have a floating tail bone.

Been told it could cause me problems but none so far.

Have you had any issues?"

Very painful getting out of bed some mornings plus I have a white patch of skin shaped like a loveheart at the base of my spine which refuses to tan.

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By *ools and the brainCouple
7 days ago

couple, us we him her.

"Blacked out running fell over hitting my head so hard I died and was fortunate that paramedics where sitting in their ambulance 20m from the incident, came back too on the back of the ambulance with no clue what had happened sat up and fought my way out totally ignoring them, ran a few metres up the road only for it to happen again hitting my head for a second time caused lifelong neurological issues and a complete personality change and lost empathy and some emotions , spiralled into depression and subsequently tried killing myself a couple of years later.

Yeah that wasn't great

Was set upon as a tennager in a racist attack by about 15 guy's with baseball bats and various other tools,they where national front thug's unhappy I had non white friends,beat me within an inch of my life breaking several bones, internal bleeding and cracked skull.

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By *hirleyMan
7 days ago

somewhere

Fractured little finger playing volleyball once, other than that rarely been injured/sick for any amount of time.

I think some people are just injury prone, but that's not luck, it's in their dna.

I've never had bad sex either, I do think that's linked too

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By *2000ManMan
7 days ago

Worthing

Playing a game called 'Stretch' as a youth. Thrower takes knife and throws it near next player. Player stretches to where knife lands. Picks up knife and throws it for next player. If you fall over, then out of game. Knife grazed big toe through trainer and made a slice. Small cut but it bled a lot and would not stop. Went to hospital. No stiches but nurse used a "freeze" spray to stop bleeding. Still have scar.

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By *an8iMan
7 days ago

Bilston

I split my head open building a tree house when I was 7ish, it was a windy day so we decided to put a brick on top of the planks of wood full of nails then there was a big gust of wind and everything landed on top of my head followed by the brick,

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By *viatrixWoman
7 days ago

Redhill

My current one. Trimalleolar fracture of my ankle with a total dislocation. 🫣

Can’t divulge how it haopened but a) it wasn’t anything naughty or silly and 2) it’s been the scariest time of my life.

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By *mma68TV/TS
7 days ago

Warrington

2 years ago, climbing ladder in crocs, fell off broke 6 ribs in 25 places, life threatening injury, hospital for a week, couldn't sleep in a bed for 14 weeks

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By *elvet RopeMan
7 days ago

by the big field

Got hit by a car when i was a kid (old school metal bumper flavour car) face resembled the guy off Goonies- eyes were facing different directions until the bruising and swelling receded, along with several broken things and significant road rash- 2 weeks in hospital and about a year to recover properly

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By *esYesOMGYes!Man
7 days ago

M20

"Falling on ice and breaking my tailbone. Agony.

Fell out of a tree as a kid. Stopped by a branch, straddling it. My balls were fine but now I have a floating tail bone.

Been told it could cause me problems but none so far.

Have you had any issues?

Very painful getting out of bed some mornings plus I have a white patch of skin shaped like a loveheart at the base of my spine which refuses to tan."

Sorry to hear it gives you trouble. I’m really lucky then.

The little love heart sounds cute.

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By *eathrow pineappleCouple
7 days ago

Hounslow

Got tackled playing football which triggered off compartment syndrome. I had a massive blood clot on my leg which lead to me spending 10 days in hospital.

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By *obilebottomMan
7 days ago

All over

Bruised ego

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By *orksRockerMan
7 days ago

Bradford

"A broken heart🎻"

Agreed, this has been my worst injury by a VERY long way and will effect me til the day I die.

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By *ensualpleasures69Man
7 days ago

leeds

"I've been lucky to not have any serious injuries. Worst is probably a dislocated finger when playing cricket, diving for the ball and it got jammed into the ground

A regular occurrence! Same with broken fingers,dislocations (put back at the crease) broken collar bone ,all cricket, hit by a bat.

Broken neck sneezing and made tv and front page of the Sun. "

Split the webbing between index and thumb in the slips (dropped the catch as well!!)

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By *atKatXWoman
7 days ago

Torn between two stories here.

Either the time I slipped in the bathroom getting ready for a first date with someone, and ended up in a moon boot for 6 weeks with a badly sprained ankle and some chipping and splintering of bones in the ankle joint.

Or the time a nurse tried to get me walking too far too soon after major abdominal surgery, and I collapsed inside a locked toilet cubicle, ripping my stitches and hitting my head on the way down, and ended up having to spend an extra few days in hospital being patched up and monitored for concussion 😅

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By *issBehavexxxWoman
7 days ago

essex

Ok here goes. This happened 3 weeks ago tomorrow.

I was in the bath and decided to send a fwb a naughty pic. I put my foot on the soap dish so I could get a good shot of erm, well you know. I slid down a bit so tried to readjust myself, put too much weight on the soap dish and it broke slashing my foot. So much blood. I managed to get out of the bath but fainted in the hallway hitting my coccyx and twisting my arm. Trip to hospital for stitches and put the back and shoulder pain down to just being bruised. Was in agony so have had a scan on my shoulder which shows fluid pressing down on my nerves and tendon. Currently waiting for a steroid injection to hopefully get rid of this dull ache I’ve had in my arm ever since.

Sorry that turned into a bit of a long one

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
7 days ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

Brain damage from a fractured skull. 🤷‍♂️

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By *andPextraCouple
7 days ago

North West

Not worst by many’s description here. However as an ex professional ballerina i’m not exaggerating to say i’ve broken every toe multiple times and if i added it up over the years (along with a few other foot bones) i’d say 50 times at least. It gets to the point where you just accept it and carry on. Which is nuts looking back.

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By *ormerWelshcouple2020Man
7 days ago

Stourbridge

"Not worst by many’s description here. However as an ex professional ballerina i’m not exaggerating to say i’ve broken every toe multiple times and if i added it up over the years (along with a few other foot bones) i’d say 50 times at least. It gets to the point where you just accept it and carry on. Which is nuts looking back. "

My wife was similar. She was on opportunity knocks as a dancer back in the day! The foot damage is unreal.

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By *atelotmanMan
7 days ago

Chatham

Mind worst was when I was 12. Dog bit my face an ripped part of my lip away plus some of my upper gum an teeth . Ended up with 58 micro stitches. Even to this day, if very cold that part of the lip turns blue.

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By *ormerWelshcouple2020Man
7 days ago

Stourbridge

Oh forgot,

Broke my nose 4 times

Broke my wrist after being thrown against a wall trying to stop someone harming themselves, broke my elbow coming off a motorbike at 10 mph , compounded fracture of my little finger in a 4/400 relay final , broken ankle at football and sent off whilst being carried off for swearing at the player who did it.

Part of my ear stitched back on after hitting a metal angle iron desk leg when I was knocked over by someone else’s fight.

Several broken ribs falling off back of a boat on the Norfolk broads trying to save a dog, ( he was ok in the end, I however nearly drowned)

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By *h3rry Bomb80Man
7 days ago

the moon

Heartbreak …. 💔 … basically

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By *leasingmyhubsCouple
7 days ago

Holbeach

Hubby. Angle grinder, snagged and snatched from his hands. Sliced thru his safety boot and deep gash.

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By *iss DevilWoman
7 days ago

Bedford

I broke my knee, badly (required 2 surgeries, 1 to put ex fix in, 2nd to put metal plates in), by slipping on wet bathroom floor when getting ready for a hot mmf threesome...

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By *nsaneronMan
7 days ago

Plymouth

My first sober New Year’s Eve since I was about 12

Fell I’ve fractured my skull over my left ear, fractured eye socket, fractured cheek, 4 bleeds on the brain, permanent damage to frontal lobe

Oooooooooooops that’ll teach me for offering to drive, TWAT 🤯

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By *olinOfBathMan
7 days ago

Corsham

Brother was sitting on the bottom of the stairs; I jumped over him, forgetting about the overhang. Three stitches...

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By *iggy5Man
7 days ago

Northamptonshire

Hmmm...well, I've been burnt, impaled, sliced, and savaged by a wild animal. Scars for everything. Plus twice had my foot run over. I don't remember that hurting though.

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By *olinOfBathMan
7 days ago

Corsham

Friend decided to leave the motorway via a tightly curving slip road, in pouring rain, at 85 mph. I was on the pillion...

I came to a halt with a 'bouncing bomb' impression, still in a sitting posture and using the base of my spine as a brake.

Two weeks in bed, two further months of light duties, intermittent back pain permanently.

He sprained his wrist, falling off.

Decades later, we're still mates.

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By *hadowtoothMan
7 days ago

Glenrothes

Ruptured Baker's Cyst - synovial fluid leaked from the knee into the calf. First time at a swingers club then a week later I was in SDEC. Got to meet a lovely doctor called Hannah who took 35mm of blood out the knee. A physio helped get the swelling down over the next 6 months. There is still some scar tissue in the calf.

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By *usie pTV/TS
7 days ago

taunton

Head injury, a wheel i was inflating exploded went up in the air and came down on my head, was out of it for eight hours came around in hospital, was filthy knocked down in the dirt, broken tooth and damaged eye, was many years ago have never remebered it happening even missed the ride in the ambulance, but I am OK now lol.

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By *andynecklaceWoman
7 days ago

Someplace

Scaphoid fracture. The pain was unbearable

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By *andering_welshman2025Man
7 days ago

Kirkby

Went over the handlebars of my bike at 11 and broke both my arms at the same time!!

Bathroom time was not a fun experience for me for those 7 weeks 🤣🤣😳

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By *eroLondonMan
7 days ago

Mayfair

Testicular torsion. (I can't believe I just said this)

#MaleSolidarity

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By *entleman.kMan
7 days ago

bilston, wolves,walsall, dudley

Dislocated my shoulder trying to catch a gearbox that slipped off the stand while doing a clutch, my shoulder was at a ninety degree forward to where it should be, knocked it back in and carried on working but with a lot of pain,

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By *ittleMissCali_MrDJCouple
7 days ago

wonderland.

Fractured a couple of vertebrae getting knocked off my bike, stupidest injury was breaking my ankle on a water slide in Morocco.

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By *utterflyandArtificeCouple
7 days ago

Trowbridge

T-boned a car that turned across me when he misjudged my speed on a bicycle.

Smashed into said car, was propelled over the roof and landed on my head (always wear a helmet).

While being treated by the lovely passers by, luckily for me, a nurse and a chiropractor. A very impatient lady parked her car on my prostrated body, crushing my feet.

It's nearly all good now and I can safely say that Arthritis is a bitch.

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By *ittleBoPeepingWoman
7 days ago

Galway, Clare

** Thread closed due to way too many icky stories **

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By *abioMan
7 days ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"Extra points if it was doing something silly.

Extra extra points if it was doing something sexy.

Infinity+1 points for the winner."

Oh I have several in both categories….

Managed to dislocate my shoulder trying to impress a then date ten pin bowling!

Had to have stitches on the top of my head after being hit by a stray boot and blood started gushing…apparently a turn off in a group but I was giggling like an idiot!!!

Now swinging medals for going down in the line of duty!!!!

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By *abioMan
7 days ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

My worst injury… which would you like… blowing out my knee during a high school basketball game…. Or breaking my leg attending a football game?

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By *abtastic Mr FoxMan
7 days ago

A den in the Glen

Broke loads of bones but the body has a way of kicking in and nullifying most of the pain. Nothing has ever compared to having hydrogen peroxide and Tinc Benz poured over the entire bottom of my red raw feet from a gigantic blister peeling off. Had to have a bit put between my teeth and never felt anything like it. Just like boiling hot water being poured on them.

Did the job though.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
7 days ago

North West

I think my spine had damage from the car accident where my car was hit at 40mph by a 40 ton lorry. My car left the tarmac and did two revolutions and finished up on the roof. I appeared unscathed but I think it contributed substantially to my spinal issues today.

Otherwise, just the time I fell off a horse because it spooked at a wet patch and I had a proximal humerus fracture. I didn't know it was broken so I got back on the horse and rode 1-handed for an hour and then drove myself home (with great difficulty).

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
7 days ago

little house on the praire

At the same time I broke my leg in three places, my knee, thirteen ribs and punctured my lung and ended up in a coma for three weeks. All by falling down the stairs

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By *eltCuteMightDeleteWoman
7 days ago

Reading

I was on a date with someone that I really, truly fancied. He said why don't we go for a walk? and I can bring my dog? I was so into this man and I love my dog so thought yes, what could go wrong?

We were talking and everything was going great. He was smiling and laughing at my stories, he was being very cute. My dog was mostly behaving. And then just as I mini stumble on some uneven pavement (I totally would have been able to right myself in normal circumstances) my dog sees a cat and lunges for it pulling me with him and I land really hard on both my hands, my left knee, get dragged further along the pavement until I let go of the dog lead. And I just lay on the ground and cry. My date asks me what he can do and then chases after my dog and brings him back. Then helps me up and I slowly trudge home cradling my arm. Trip to A&E confirms broken wrist.

And I have flashbacks for weeks of this pretty, pretty man witnessing me falling over, being dragged, crying on the ground. The wrist hurt a lot but so did my bruised dignity.

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By *rowneyedgirlWoman
7 days ago

Central belt

I was attacked by a dog when I was a child, and needed my nose reattached, which is neither sexy nor silly... Apologies! 🙈

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By *ertcoupleCouple
7 days ago

Hatfield

Mr.

I fell out a tree when about 9, got a steel fence post through the top of my leg... if I hadn't kind of kicked the tree on the way down and moved a foot it would've gone right through my back and out my stomach and probably killed me.

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By * and R cple4Couple
7 days ago

swansea

I fell in toilets and knocked myself out on a tampax machine.. Same night i fell down a hill and broke the top of my shoulder.

Never touched a jagerbomb since 😂

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By *porty_and_NaughtyCouple
7 days ago

Swansea

Ruptured my ACL and tore my meniscus in 3 places whilst on a trail run. I had to hobble back 1/4 mile to a rowing boat to cross back over a river and as I boarded the boat my knee went out again.

New ligament created using a hamstring tendon and some metal plates and screws. 11 months of intense physio later and I'm back running and training for a marathon in April.

Mrs

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By *atKatXWoman
7 days ago

Ohhh I almost forgot about the time I fell off a bench I was dancing on at bongos bingo. Split my elbow open and whacked the back of my head on another bench as I went down. Half an hour outside with ice on my head and getting my elbow bandaged and went back in to finish the night out to a round of applause from everyone in the venue 😂

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By *avexxMan
7 days ago

cheshire

shard of glass in left eye after two operations failed to regain sight in left eye

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By *elix Sighted OP Man
7 days ago

Cloud 8

Who here felt nervous writing “Luckily I’ve never had anything too serious”? 😳 Talk about tempting fate!

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By *ojangles69Woman
7 days ago

Milton Keynes

Worst is spent 6 weeks in icu after being kicked twice by a horse . First kick caught arm and ribs second one caused the most damage. Of nearly losted my spleen, gallbladder and my pancus ( the tail part spilt into half left with a cyst. 6 months off work. And yes I still love horse's!!

Not bad one was my old horse. Out riding he slipped over and landed on top of me in the middle of the wood's!! The bugger fuck off too!! Lucky had my phone.

Two year's ago whist cantering down a hill horse I ended up waking up on the floor no idea what happened no horse to be seen....banging head stars etc!!

Many more horse related injuries over the years too!!

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By *ildo_swagginsthe3rdWoman
7 days ago

Wales

"I broke my ribs as a result of an overly excitable wank.

I deposited the goods to the floor, then promptly slipped on them, falling over the edge of the bathtub, and busting 3 ribs."

Wanking trauma 🤣

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By *ife NinjaMan
7 days ago

Dunfermline

Broke my ankle aged 11. Fucker still hurts in the cold now

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By *ildo_swagginsthe3rdWoman
7 days ago

Wales

I was on a date with someone that I really, truly fancied. He said why don't we go for a walk? and I can bring my dog? I was so into this man and I love my dog so thought yes, what could go wrong?

And I have flashbacks for weeks of this pretty, pretty man witnessing me falling over, being dragged, crying on the ground. The wrist hurt a lot but so did my bruised dignity.

Did you have a second date??

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By *lynJMan
7 days ago

Morden

I was on a date with someone that I really, truly fancied. He said why don't we go for a walk? and I can bring my dog? I was so into this man and I love my dog so thought yes, what could go wrong?

And I have flashbacks for weeks of this pretty, pretty man witnessing me falling over, being dragged, crying on the ground. The wrist hurt a lot but so did my bruised dignity.

But was there a second date? 🤔

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By *ad NannaWoman
7 days ago

East London

Jumped off a wall onto a piece of machinery and fractured my arm in two places.

Even though it was over 50 years ago I can still remember the pain, and the event, vividly.

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By *rdenites2Couple
7 days ago

Market Bosworth

Fell out of the loft and smashed my ankle.

On the way down my pants got caught on the door handle and it looked like I was bungee jumping.

Had one op on it but need a new ankle very soon.

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By *punk n gushCouple
7 days ago

deal

In my teens broke elbow cartwheeling off a bench

Adult broken my foot in a baby stair gate

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By *eltCuteMightDeleteWoman
7 days ago

Reading

I was on a date with someone that I really, truly fancied. He said why don't we go for a walk? and I can bring my dog? I was so into this man and I love my dog so thought yes, what could go wrong?

And I have flashbacks for weeks of this pretty, pretty man witnessing me falling over, being dragged, crying on the ground. The wrist hurt a lot but so did my bruised dignity.

Did you have a second date??"

Yes, there was a second date. Was it a sympathy second date?? WHO KNOWS.

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By *Silver-Man
7 days ago

Mold

Broken Heart

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By *ustamanMan
7 days ago

weymouth

Trapped nerve in my neck which affected my left arm, lost 80% of my power. 6 months of pain before I managed to get it sorted. Occured whilst dreaming woke up jerking that arm then felt it go

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By *umpkinandCakeCouple
7 days ago

Hitchin

I crushed the tip of my finger off in a chain and sprocket mechanism on a bit of industrial kit.

Broke my kneecap in half coming off my motorcycle and had absolutely no feeling in it for nearly 2 years.

Cake x

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By *upersonic SamMan
7 days ago

wigan

Fractured leg, both ACLs (football) broken jaw, 4 broken ribs (work) broken foot (kicked a bowling ball) broken hand x 3 (2 x work, 1 x plain clothed police office). All bloody hurt

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By *urry BlokeMan
7 days ago

Stalybridge

Broken elbow

Fell off a broken kerb coming out of Pets at Home

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By *unguy410Man
7 days ago

Cambridge

Once tore a muscle between a couple of ribs by coughing. Took weeks to heal.

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By *rucking-HellMan
7 days ago

Northampton

A very bruised ego when I slipped at a nightclub urinal, reached out to stop myself, but face-planted the trough whilst my knees were on the very wet floor. (back in the late 90s).

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By *orester891Man
7 days ago

Walking across a wooden bridge after rain , minding my own business , fell and broke my left knee cap in half . Hurt like fuck as they say at Roedean . Now held together with chicken wire and a couple screws .

Never been quite the same since and I’m really careful in frosts, don’t want to do that again. A lot going on with tendons, ligaments and muscles around your knee. Doggy style is a must now lol !

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By *istalloverCouple
7 days ago

Pays de la Loire -Normandie -Brittany borderFrance

Fractured my ankle and foot.

Decided to have a few drinks while off work .got pissed, fell over damaging other foot and a few days later got gout in both feet .

That's pain

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By *ildbillkidMan
7 days ago

where the road goes on forever

Hmmm, not an injury but had a heart attack, two stents,big old bruise on my groin

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By *aloma PicassoWoman
7 days ago

Waterford city

Damaged my knee falling over one of my cats.

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By *ee642024Woman
7 days ago

Crook

got knocked down by a small truck in 2023.had a fractured ankle.my son had to look after me till i could manage to walk around again.

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By *ositiveVibesWoman
7 days ago

here there and everywhere

Fell down the stairs a week before my wedding, must have busted my coccyx real bad, took months for it to stop hurting

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By *izzy.miss.lizzyCouple
7 days ago

Pembrokeshire

came off a norton 850 motorbike in the snow, skidded down the road on my back for a short distance, and hit a kerb.

Killed off a huge swathe of muscle tissue across my left bum cheek, and later led to my C4 and C5 discs being seriously out of kilter.

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By *cflirtyMan
7 days ago

Hampshire

Worst injuries were sustained in a motorbike crash, and lucky to still be here after braking multiple bones but stupidest one was jumping out of a tree as a kid and landing on a piece of wood with 2 nails sticking out... right through my right foot! My dad cut the wood to the length of my shoe and took me to a and e wood included

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By *cflirtyMan
7 days ago

Hampshire

"came off a norton 850 motorbike in the snow, skidded down the road on my back for a short distance, and hit a kerb.

Killed off a huge swathe of muscle tissue across my left bum cheek, and later led to my C4 and C5 discs being seriously out of kilter.

I feel your pain x

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By *ch16Man
7 days ago

West hull

Been quite lucky, never broke a bone or dislocated any part of my body.

Unfortunately I was born with a small gullet so from a young age had to chew food really well or cut into smaller pieces. Quite often I'd get food lodged and it would eventually go down slowly....until about 2019 when I had a piece of chicken and it got lodged in my throat, thankfully not in the airway, 2 visits to hospital failed to remove it and eventually had to have an operation to remove the chicken, had to sign a form if anything went wrong I couldn't claim it etc, thankfully they removed it, stretched my oesophagus so it was easier to swallow

. Never seen so much saliva in my life upto the op lol

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By *ootylover25Man
7 days ago

Middlesbrough

Was hit by a d*unk driver, got a scar on my neck and had 2 surgeries on my knee, it has about an inch square bit of bone missing and 13yrs later it's still not right. Was in a wheelchair for 6 months after that one

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By *ad NannaWoman
7 days ago

East London

"Broken elbow

Fell off a broken kerb coming out of Pets at Home

I don't know why I laughed at that. Sorry

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By *urves and MischiefWoman
7 days ago

Northerner/Sometimes South East

Came off a quad bike, shoulder landed on a rock and the quad fell on me. Luckily only a torn ligament but couldn’t use my arm properly for weeks.

Loads more … I’m quite clumsy

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By *TRAY-CATMan
7 days ago

dundee

While digging in the garden using a fork( not a kitchen one). I thrust it straight through my foot . Was only painful for a couple of seconds but had stitches top and bottom of foot.

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By *mandajane01TV/TS
7 days ago

Ballymena

[Removed by poster at 08/02/25 23:03:33]

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By *ympho6969Woman
7 days ago

glasgow

Broken foot, skin ripped to bone and muscle on my heels. All cos I stuck my foot down a hole on a playground roundabout as a kid.

Tiny hospital sent me home, to a caravan with a tubagrip to return the next day for someone to read the xray and put on a cast.

I've had a child unmedicated and it was right up there on the pain level

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By *mandajane01TV/TS
7 days ago

Ballymena

"I broke my nose when I walked into a wall with a hardon "

Must have a pretty small dick if it’s shorter than your nose

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By *izzy.miss.lizzyCouple
7 days ago

Pembrokeshire

"came off a norton 850 motorbike

I feel your pain x"

thankyou

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By *reat me rightWoman
7 days ago

Rotherham

Breaking my coccyx. By walking backwards helping someone - and falling over my own suitcase (a big heavy vintage thing that was full of stock and didn't move even as I sailed over it).

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By *ormerWelshcouple2020Man
6 days ago

Stourbridge

"came off a norton 850 motorbike in the snow, skidded down the road on my back for a short distance, and hit a kerb.

Killed off a huge swathe of muscle tissue across my left bum cheek, and later led to my C4 and C5 discs being seriously out of kilter.

I feel for you , excruciating pain

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By *rMan321Man
6 days ago

Near Alnwick

Dislocated shoulder, rugby. Missing a tackle.

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By *echnosonic_BrummieMan
6 days ago

Willenhall

Broken tibia, broken fibula, several fractured ribs and a fractured cheekbone.

I really should have listened to those "Stop! Look! Listen!" infomercials when I was a child.

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By *esthetic21Man
6 days ago

Birmingham/Bristol

100% a broken heart by a mile

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By *udding RoseWoman
4 days ago

Somewhere out there

Gosh, some of these injuries sound horrific, some of ye are lucky to be alive!!

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By *arko2020Man
4 days ago

Sale

Fractured vertebrae sliding down a pole and hitting the ground rather hard...!

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By *heLeadbettersCouple
4 days ago

Reading

"Extra points if it was doing something silly.

Extra extra points if it was doing something sexy.

Infinity+1 points for the winner."

Jerry:

Shot once, stabbed three times.

Both a "tad" uncomfortable.

Margo:

Frozen shoulder for 18 months

Then broke her other arm falling over at work.

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By *IMLITTLEDEVILMan
4 days ago

Bridgwater

Got Shot 🔫.

Stabbed 🔪 .

and Blown up 🧨.

They call me Lucky 😆

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By *illy IdolMan
4 days ago

Midlands

"Got Shot 🔫.

Stabbed 🔪 .

and Blown up 🧨.

They call me Lucky 😆"

I feel like my dislocated shoulder is irrelevant now.

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By *innamon_flameWoman
4 days ago

london

Broken my hymen a fair few decades back

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By *ouple11Man
4 days ago

cardiff

Snapped my neck playing rugby was in wheel chair for2 tears then had tb meningitis on life support now a full gas qualified plumber I think I done well

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By *ouple11Man
4 days ago

cardiff

Snapped my neck playing rugby was in wheel chair for2 tears then had tb meningitis on life support now a full gas qualified plumber I think I done well

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By *inkylipsWoman
4 days ago

Debauchery

Was pushed down the stairs by my sister and landed head first on concrete. Fractured skull and 4 or so weeks in hospital I believe I’ve been pretty lucky 😂🤣

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By *ilf and old fartCouple
4 days ago

Between Ely and Mildenhall

"came off a norton 850 motorbike in the snow, skidded down the road on my back for a short distance, and hit a kerb.

Killed off a huge swathe of muscle tissue across my left bum cheek, and later led to my C4 and C5 discs being seriously out of kilter.

Did you get the Norton Commando repaired ?

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By *vaRose43Woman
4 days ago

Forest of Dean

3rd degree full thickness burns on my foot. Several weeks in hospital

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By *ony MannMan
4 days ago

Lagos, Portugal/ Ilfracombe Devon/ Anoover

To many to pick from, but I'm still here.

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By *ilf and old fartCouple
4 days ago

Between Ely and Mildenhall

I was riding a Triumph Bonneville and had a car pull out in front of me.

I fractured my skull, fractured/broke most of my ribs, broke both arms and chipped most of the vertebrae of my spine.

I was on a life support while in a coma and in plaster for months.

Cars are bloody dangerous things !!!

I still ride bikes though

🤣🤣

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By *urvyBunnyWoman
4 days ago

Suffolk

I had a pencil stuck in my head as a kid, I was carrying it and running to my school gate. Pushed the gate open and it slammed back into me, knocking my hand and jabbing the pencil 2 inches into my eyebrow 😬 If it wasn't for me wearing my glasses that day, I would have lost my left eye!

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By *assageman300Man
4 days ago

Cambs

Knocked off my motorbike, the young lady hit me twice.

Nearly lost my arm, lost the full use of my left arm and hand.

Try missionary with one arm behind your back, its hilarious trying to get off and fall onto your side of the bed lol

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By *entshyguyMan
4 days ago

northfleet

After an hour of rough sex with a girlfriend back in the 90’s I tore my what is now known as (Banjo string). “It’s ok now though”!

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By *entshyguyMan
4 days ago

northfleet

Also in the 2000’s a crazy ex woke me up after I was ignoring her pretending to be asleep and poked my testicles with her lit cigarette. The cherry left a burn that I had to go to dr to get ointment for it. Although it did open my eyes a tad at the time and she shortly became ex wife no.1. Don’t get me started on ex no.2 . Lol

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By *M60Couple
4 days ago

Central Scotland

Broken both ankles and fractured a wrist playing contact sports and working on doors ive been stabbed once and slashed twice ( nothing major ) various other things requiring stitches since i was a kid including the obligatory fast exit from the top of a tree to the ground in two seconds.

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By *aldBeardy36Man
4 days ago

Manchester

Almost suffered a penal fracture, girl was on top, I slipped out a bit as she was coming down.

Too close for my liking.

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By (user no longer on site)
4 days ago

Broke my neck but didn't die... fell of the bed having sex

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By *rJandMrsJCouple
4 days ago

Hyde

I've been hot by a car, knocked into the air, head smashed against the frame and my arm went through the windscreen and sliced the nerves in my arm?

I also got a metal pellet stuck in my hand for a few days after asking my d*unk friend to shoot me ( I was young and dumb)

And this one is because I'm getting old, but I was sat on the sofa talking to my ex, I turned to my left, heard a pop and slipped a disc in my back and fractured my neck... just by turning to the side haha

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By *a LunaWoman
4 days ago

South Wales

Many years ago (in my late 20’s) I damaged my sciatic nerve doing a Billy Blanks Tae Bo home exercise DVD.

I was off work for month, but luckily the Company I was with at the time I had private medical insurance that paid for me to see a Specialist who did a MRI scan (and I found out it was my sciatic nerve).

It hasn’t been right since. I have to be very careful or my back pings and I can barely move. Happens at least once a year, if not more.

Also broken my ankle tripping over a carpet thread and damaged my rotator cuff when I fell painting a skirting board

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By *arry McKockiner69Man
4 days ago

Exeter

Breaking my leg walking to the bus stop to get the school bus 🤦🏻‍♂️

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By *orny PTMan
4 days ago

Peterborough

Bent my left thumb, backwards, pointing towards my left wrist. This was because some twat left their bicycle on the garden path.

I was 4 at the time.

Landing hand first over the frame, folding that thumb back hurt.

It bloody hurt I can tell you.

This was reset in hospital, by someone who knew what they were doing. Mum does not always know best, as she wanted to twist back in place.

It is 99% OK, just aches when carrying heavy loads.

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By *issYeuxBleusWoman
4 days ago

My boudoir - S Wales

I slipped down a pathway to a beach and landed on my wrist. I was in so much pain with that I didn’t even realise the stones pushed up under my toenail and ripped it off.

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By *issYeuxBleusWoman
4 days ago

My boudoir - S Wales

Oh also broke my leg dancing at a wedding. I have a plate and 8 screws.

I’m sure there’s more. I’m a disaster!

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By *a LunaWoman
4 days ago

South Wales

My mums favourite saying if I ever hurt/broke something as I was growing up was “you’ll get arthritis in that when you’re older”.

Thanks mum

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By *amie HantsWoman
4 days ago

Atlantis

Tore my Achilles tendon slipping down a cliff face in search for a bush to pee in. At the top I needed a wee at the bottom I didn’t. I don’t actually remember wetting myself but the wet trousers confirmed that’s what happened

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By *ryagain2Man
4 days ago

Morecambe

Shot myself through my finger with a nail gun! Twice 🤦🏻‍♂️

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By *ensualtongue2023Man
4 days ago

furnace

A chop saw

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By *elix Sighted OP Man
4 days ago

Cloud 8

"Oh also broke my leg dancing at a wedding. I have a plate and 8 screws.

I’m sure there’s more. I’m a disaster!"

Dinner and 8 shags with a broken leg? Now that’s commitment.

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By *ild-One710Man
4 days ago

Northampton

When i was like 12 years did something very stupid and snapped my arm, didn't dare tell my parents what actually happend and said it happend playing football, 2 years later broke my other arm playing football falling over and landed wierd

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By *ergus1622Man
4 days ago

Dundee

I was mountain biking about 14 years ago when I was going down a track and a tree had fallen over it the night before from a storm, it's a track been down several times and was doing over 30mph when I hit the tree. I had Major concussion broken both eye sockets, both cheek bones cracked top and bottom jaw, bit my tougne in half,I compressed my spine and in doing so compressed all my organs inside, I had to be helicopter lift out to hospital where I was in for 2 weeks the first 4 days were under induced comma because of brain swelling. There was more but that's enough info lol but my bike got fixed before I was out of hospital and still ride it to this day fully healed and ready to go on adventures

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By *eavenNhellCouple
4 days ago

carrbrook stalybridge

severely bruised my groin hips and shoulders plus fractured my skull Co driving a rally car after hitting a large stone marker whilst flat out in 6th . rolled five times destroyed the car so bad my seat mounts broke hence bruising from harnesses and breaking my helmet on the roll kage .remember first roll then woke up in A&E

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By *ongAndThick123Man
4 days ago

Leeds

Collapsed my lung in a nightclub

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By *orny PTMan
4 days ago

Peterborough

Had ballache from going too hard.

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By *amantha_JadeWoman
4 days ago

…

Fractured my coccyx after falling down the stairs at a train station 😭

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By *inkShyWoman
4 days ago

near Windsor

Broke my ribs on holiday trying to catch a coxkroach... sprayed insect repellent and it turned the floor to an ice rink. Ran into the bathroom, slipped, went about 4 feet into the air and came down sideways on a ceramic bath tub.

Broke my thumb doing a Gladiator duel on those podiums

Split my lip open doing those hanging ring things in the park and forgetting to grab the next ring 🤣

Tore the tendon off the bone in my ankle, I tripped in the snow and fell for about 20 feet in a slow motion superman position

Knocked myself out trying to go diagonally down a hill on a bike. Didn't go well..

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By *issYeuxBleusWoman
4 days ago

My boudoir - S Wales

"Oh also broke my leg dancing at a wedding. I have a plate and 8 screws.

I’m sure there’s more. I’m a disaster!

Dinner and 8 shags with a broken leg? Now that’s commitment."

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By *ou only live onceMan
4 days ago

London

1) Broke my wrist trying and failing to scale a drainpipe.

2) Fell over my dog in a running race with my cousin, used a brick to break my fall and ended up with 6 stitches in my forehead. Cool scar when I went back to school though.

I was a clumsy child!

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