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"I don't think it's for me, but I kind of envy those that can get their heads round it I'm all for sharing physically, but I wouldn't want to share emotionally" I think what helps me with partners loving others is loving them in a way that I care so much about their happiness even if that’s with others | |||
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"I wish I had the physical time and mental space to set up a proper poly relationship. Life has other ideas, alas. " Life is the worst I’m getting a bit tired of it | |||
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"Poly saturated? Aside from the Flora jokes, I think it’s when you’re not able to meet your partner’s needs or desires. For me that can vary as to my mental health as well as time and energy. At the moment I’m feeling the strain with three partners. Last month? I was loving life" I think three partners would be a real struggle for me so big up you for managing that. I have a person that’s basically a partner tbf so it’s like having 3 partners and I feel very much like I’m reaching saturation point. | |||
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"With all due respect, "all welcome" really? Last time I posted on a poly thread you said, maybe not in so many words, that anyone that didn't understand it shouldn't comment. It's a public forum, you'll get opinions from all sides. Maybe you could set a group chat with like minded individuals, to avoid that." I said people shouldn’t comment? | |||
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"Poly saturated? Aside from the Flora jokes, I think it’s when you’re not able to meet your partner’s needs or desires. For me that can vary as to my mental health as well as time and energy. At the moment I’m feeling the strain with three partners. Last month? I was loving life I think three partners would be a real struggle for me so big up you for managing that. I have a person that’s basically a partner tbf so it’s like having 3 partners and I feel very much like I’m reaching saturation point. " I honestly don’t know how I do. It’s a constant balancing act and I’m pretty time poor | |||
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"With all due respect, "all welcome" really? Last time I posted on a poly thread you said, maybe not in so many words, that anyone that didn't understand it shouldn't comment. It's a public forum, you'll get opinions from all sides. Maybe you could set a group chat with like minded individuals, to avoid that. I said people shouldn’t comment? " In a round about way, yes.  | |||
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"With all due respect, "all welcome" really? Last time I posted on a poly thread you said, maybe not in so many words, that anyone that didn't understand it shouldn't comment. It's a public forum, you'll get opinions from all sides. Maybe you could set a group chat with like minded individuals, to avoid that. I said people shouldn’t comment? In a round about way, yes. "So I didn’t say that then? | |||
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"I believe that it was a request to not be mean. Not a do not comment post." There was definitely a request for people of certain opinions to avoid posting 🤷♀️ | |||
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"With all due respect, "all welcome" really? Last time I posted on a poly thread you said, maybe not in so many words, that anyone that didn't understand it shouldn't comment. It's a public forum, you'll get opinions from all sides. Maybe you could set a group chat with like minded individuals, to avoid that. I said people shouldn’t comment? In a round about way, yes.
So I didn’t say that then?"You know what was said, I'm just offering advice on how to avoid people giving you their opinions, as that rarely goes down well 🤷♀️ | |||
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"I believe that it was a request to not be mean. Not a do not comment post. There was definitely a request for people of certain opinions to avoid posting 🤷♀️ " It's a bit odd wanting to post though. If someone put a request up for someone to shit on them then I wouldn't reply as that's not a bit of me. | |||
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"I believe that it was a request to not be mean. Not a do not comment post. There was definitely a request for people of certain opinions to avoid posting 🤷♀️ " If people don’t like poly or understand poly or whatever I’ve asked them to not be mean. They’re welcome - as you said, anyone can post, but being nice would be preferred | |||
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"With all due respect, "all welcome" really? Last time I posted on a poly thread you said, maybe not in so many words, that anyone that didn't understand it shouldn't comment. It's a public forum, you'll get opinions from all sides. Maybe you could set a group chat with like minded individuals, to avoid that. I said people shouldn’t comment? In a round about way, yes.
So I didn’t say that then?
You know what was said, I'm just offering advice on how to avoid people giving you their opinions, as that rarely goes down well 🤷♀️"Well thanks. And thanks for letting me know I upset you.  | |||
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" Well thanks. And thanks for letting me know I upset you. "Oh, you didn't. Interesting, make a comment about it being a public forum and people start getting defensive. Just that you mentioned previous threads. If you don't like "mean" comments, take it to the group chat that I'm sure already exists, problem solved | |||
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" Well thanks. And thanks for letting me know I upset you.
Oh, you didn't. Interesting, make a comment about it being a public forum and people start getting defensive. Just that you mentioned previous threads.
If you don't like "mean" comments, take it to the group chat that I'm sure already exists, problem solved"Dfkm. 💀🤣 And group chat? Girl 
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Yes, I think so. I don't have as much emotional and mental bandwidth and time to balance everything as it is. But it's also more than that... I'm happy for the most part. Content if that's not too nauseating a term to use.
My life is rather busy and I wouldn't want to give less of myself to anyone. They deserve the world. | |||
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"Going back to the OP because I'm really enjoying learning more about how others view/approach things and sadly for me, I'm not part of this super cool top secret polyam group chat ...
Yes, I think so. I don't have as much emotional and mental bandwidth and time to balance everything as it is. But it's also more than that... I'm happy for the most part. Content if that's not too nauseating a term to use.
My life is rather busy and I wouldn't want to give less of myself to anyone. They deserve the world."Not you being messy 😭 I changed my mind I hate you | |||
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"Going back to the OP because I'm really enjoying learning more about how others view/approach things and sadly for me, I'm not part of this super cool top secret polyam group chat ...
Yes, I think so. I don't have as much emotional and mental bandwidth and time to balance everything as it is. But it's also more than that... I'm happy for the most part. Content if that's not too nauseating a term to use.
My life is rather busy and I wouldn't want to give less of myself to anyone. They deserve the world.
Not you being messy 😭 I changed my mind I hate you "🥲 Worth it. Can you review your hatred stance next month or are you too polysaturated to? | |||
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"Going back to the OP because I'm really enjoying learning more about how others view/approach things and sadly for me, I'm not part of this super cool top secret polyam group chat ...
Yes, I think so. I don't have as much emotional and mental bandwidth and time to balance everything as it is. But it's also more than that... I'm happy for the most part. Content if that's not too nauseating a term to use.
My life is rather busy and I wouldn't want to give less of myself to anyone. They deserve the world.
Not you being messy 😭 I changed my mind I hate you
🥲 Worth it. Can you review your hatred stance next month or are you too polysaturated to?"I am currently too saturated. Cutting friendships is ideal rn  | |||
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"I think my ideal would be poly-lite. Not a relationship or relationships. Sort of, multiple best friends plus sex. Stay the night occasionally, but go home to your own house and we keep some boundaries." That's what I have now but not best friends. Good friends who i talk to most days and see at least weekly. I can't do one relationship let alone multiple. Not my bag at all but ENM is perfect. | |||
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"How do other poly people navigate any jealousy from their partner's other partner? or if the other partner is struggling with the time they spend with you as they can't spend time with them themselves? " I think that's the key to making it work and my understanding is that each person in the relationship can have other partners that they would be in a polyamorous relationship with? At least that would be how I would view it, maybe I'm wrong. Then it's about communication to avoid the jealousy I would say, but then everyone involved has to be on board with the dynamics. | |||
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"How do other poly people navigate any jealousy from their partner's other partner? or if the other partner is struggling with the time they spend with you as they can't spend time with them themselves? " Jealousy happens, it's sitting with it and working out why that's the useful thing. What do you need for yourself that's causing the jealousy? The meta's (partner's partner) problems are for your partner to resolve (unless you're being a dick and unfair). If they're justified in their upset then it makes sense to all work towards a solution. That could look like more time spent with the meta. Or de-escalating the relationship if a compromise can't be found. | |||
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"I don't think it's for me, but I kind of envy those that can get their heads round it I'm all for sharing physically, but I wouldn't want to share emotionally" I'm exactly the same. I'm also a total hypocrite in that I could be emotionally invested in more than one person, but I really don't think I'm in the place where I could be with someone who had a deep emotional connection with a person or people other than me | |||
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"I wish I had the physical time and mental space to set up a proper poly relationship. Life has other ideas, alas. Life is the worst I’m getting a bit tired of it" Pickle, you wouldn't believe me if I told you what's been going down here this week. It's too bonkers. I barely have time to decipher my own thoughts. | |||
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"How do other poly people navigate any jealousy from their partner's other partner? or if the other partner is struggling with the time they spend with you as they can't spend time with them themselves? " Jealousy is a secondary emotion and often arises from a need not being met or a perception of someone having something that you want, whether that’s time, energy or whatever. The important thing is that jealousy is your problem to manage and deal with. It’s about communicating those needs in a healthy way, not using your jealousy as a tool to manipulate or control others | |||
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"How do other poly people navigate any jealousy from their partner's other partner? or if the other partner is struggling with the time they spend with you as they can't spend time with them themselves? " Jealousy happens, and honestly if any poly person said they’d never experienced it I would see that as a bit of a red flag. When it comes to the meta partners…. That’s not your circus. The person who is the hinge needs to navigate that. Being mindful of a meta especially if you are the newest member is fair and it helps sometimes to remind the hinge that perhaps they’re getting carried away with NRE. If there is a big issue it’s for you to set your own boundaries and if the others can’t or won’t meet those, then the decision has to be made whether you change your boundaries or perhaps de-escalate or end things. When it comes to your own feelings it’s important to be honest with your partners, and really examine why you’re feeling this way. Mine often stems from an insecurity and some simple reassurance is really all I need. I find being poly means I do a lot of self reflection that I never did when in monogamous relationships and it’s really helped me understand myself better and articulate my needs in healthier ways. | |||
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"How do other poly people navigate any jealousy from their partner's other partner? or if the other partner is struggling with the time they spend with you as they can't spend time with them themselves? Jealousy happens, and honestly if any poly person said they’d never experienced it I would see that as a bit of a red flag. When it comes to the meta partners…. That’s not your circus. The person who is the hinge needs to navigate that. Being mindful of a meta especially if you are the newest member is fair and it helps sometimes to remind the hinge that perhaps they’re getting carried away with NRE. If there is a big issue it’s for you to set your own boundaries and if the others can’t or won’t meet those, then the decision has to be made whether you change your boundaries or perhaps de-escalate or end things. When it comes to your own feelings it’s important to be honest with your partners, and really examine why you’re feeling this way. Mine often stems from an insecurity and some simple reassurance is really all I need. I find being poly means I do a lot of self reflection that I never did when in monogamous relationships and it’s really helped me understand myself better and articulate my needs in healthier ways. " ❤️ | |||
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"All my waffling and Tea and Julie articulated that so much better than I could have. " I think that it’s nice to see people give slightly different answers but in the same vein. It kind of reinforces and underlines how we do things | |||
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"All my waffling and Tea and Julie articulated that so much better than I could have. " Not at all. All very valid and important points that you articulated brilliantly. | |||
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"I never like seeing interesting threads get derailed. Am gently bring the thread back to the OP... A poly relationship isn't something that I would be interested in for myself, but I do find it a very interesting topic and would appreciate gaining a further understanding of the dynamics and considerations regarding the feeling or desire for more and an awareness of completeness. Thanks Mrs" There’s some awesome Reddit groups that give amazing insights into the benefits and challenges of poly relationships | |||
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