FabSwingers.com forum: Younger couples divorce more than older couples.

By *hagTonight OP Man
2 weeks ago

From the land of haribos.

I watched an interesting program about how younger couples divorce more than the older ones, they talked about many things like how different the world is today and values compared to back in the days, like the dating scene, now people swipe left and right, rather than to get out on the dance floor and get to know each other better.

They added that fear of commitment was also a big part of it, because we dont live in a society that promotes or rewards good behavior, furthermore they said how the social media which I agree with has conditioned the masses to never be satisfied and to keep pursuing something better, this include relationships, basically society has been poisoned by the postmodern era movement.

What is your view about it, do you agree with the points and that younger couples divorce more than the older couples? I totally agree that the biggest change of why the big difference is the fear of commitment as we live in a totally different society

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By *aomilatteCouple
2 weeks ago

Midlands

What channel is the program on please as we'd like to watch it? Marriage is less common amongst younger couples now, unless we're mistaken?

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By *is and hers 2024Couple
2 weeks ago

york

Personally I wonder if it's just more about values, currently everyone is so self obsessed, all about my rights, what I'm entitled to, where as before there were stronger senses of community and everyone helping each other out.

With the Internet that sense of community and in essence social skills too are diminished.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
2 weeks ago

East Sussex

I think people no longer stay in unhappy relationships for life.

I think of people that do stay married quite a few are disatisfied.

I'm not sure sticking with an unhappy situation is a good thing.

I wish when there are children involved in a split people would consider them more

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By *NormalMan01Man
2 weeks ago

Harrogate

I don’t think I really agree with the points, not to say I don’t understand them.

I think, now, there’s less stigma around divorce. There’s a wider picture of divorce actually probably being better for all parties involved. Kids, your partner and yourself.

There’s more to it that just values and morals but health and happiness, too.

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By *ed MartinMan
2 weeks ago

Shefford

That may be true OP, but I’m sure we all know more than a few older couples who stay together when they should not because of the stigma of divorce in their generation, “for the sake of the children” or similar. They stay in a hateful, spite filled toxic relationship doing themselves and the children they think they are protecting way more harm in the process.

I include my own parents in this group, and I spend most of my spare time mediating the arguments between them. They’d both be way happier if they had split up years ago and moved on to find happiness elsewhere- which is what I chose to do when my ex-wife’s abuse turned physical and it was the best decision of my life.

Divorce isn’t a young people problem OP, it’s a young people solution.

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By *eedsmale36Man
2 weeks ago

Leeds

I blame Facebook, Instagram and all that social media bollocks !

But then again what do I know. I’m always on fab looking at the stunning hot wives

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By *hagTonight OP Man
2 weeks ago

From the land of haribos.

"What channel is the program on please as we'd like to watch it? Marriage is less common amongst younger couples now, unless we're mistaken?"
It wasnt a program on its own, it was a short program on the news talking about it, yes, you are right there. I also agree that marriage is less common with younger couples now too.

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man
2 weeks ago

BRIDPORT

It’s a throwaway society, that includes marriage.

The institution of marriage is not viewed with the same reverence as it once was, it is entered into lightly, with the knowledge you can bailout if you don’t like it.

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By *ell GwynnWoman
2 weeks ago

North Yorkshire

I've just looked this up and found a study that says UK divorce rates are falling, not increasing.

Nobody divorces lightly, especially when children are involved. People generally limp on for a good few years in unhappy marriages before making that decision.

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By *hagTonight OP Man
2 weeks ago

From the land of haribos.

"Personally I wonder if it's just more about values, currently everyone is so self obsessed, all about my rights, what I'm entitled to, where as before there were stronger senses of community and everyone helping each other out.

With the Internet that sense of community and in essence social skills too are diminished. "
Hi hisandhers, yes. I also think it is just more about values too

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By *ornycougaWoman
2 weeks ago

Wherever I lay my hat

"It’s a throwaway society, that includes marriage.

The institution of marriage is not viewed with the same reverence as it once was, it is entered into lightly, with the knowledge you can bailout if you don’t like it.

But the institution of marriage is outmoded. It was a construct in western socities for protecting the bloodline and chattels at a time when people died much earlier and women's happiness and sexual gratification were inconsequential. Fortunately in our society at least things have moved on. It is unrealistic to think that - in most cases - you can meet someone in your 20s and still be friends, lovers and soul mates in your 80s.

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By *amie HantsWoman
2 weeks ago

Atlantis

I agree with what Mrs NC said. I’m glad people leave unhappy relationships. My grandmother made the decision to leave my grandad when my mum was a baby because of how abusive he was. She was homeless with a baby but said she would rather that then stay. She then went on to help a lot of other women leave their husbands.

Threads after threads of unhappy marriages should they stay? Should they cheat? Should they try convince their partners to shag others?

I’d rather just end a relationship than carry on the way some people do. If some people see virtue in staying in a miserable relationship due to some outdated concept that once you’re in you can never change your mind then that’s their decision but divorce is not new. Last year or the year before they made it easier to divorce by bringing in no fault divorces which mean people can’t contest it. Cheaper and easier to divorce than it ever has been.

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By *dz69247Man
2 weeks ago

Manchester

I think half of it could be survivor bias though, whilst you do see a lot more older couples still in a marriage, I know plenty that have ended in divorce.

I think more older couples, the finances are more tightly tided, they are more likely to have children and property is difficult to split evenly.

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By *ad NannaWoman
2 weeks ago

East London

"It’s a throwaway society, that includes marriage.

The institution of marriage is not viewed with the same reverence as it once was, it is entered into lightly, with the knowledge you can bailout if you don’t like it.

Which I think is a good thing. It's only a ceremony with a signed document that gives you marital rights.

It doesn't have to be forever if someone isn't happy.

My ex turned into a beast once we were married and my last child was born (the boy he wanted).

If I'd known how terrible my life was going to be I'd have turned a different corner the day I met him.

Or, left the hospital with my son and headed to a women's refuge.

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By *ad NannaWoman
2 weeks ago

East London

"I think half of it could be survivor bias though, whilst you do see a lot more older couples still in a marriage, I know plenty that have ended in divorce.

I think more older couples, the finances are more tightly tided, they are more likely to have children and property is difficult to split evenly."

I know of many older women who suffered at the hands of their husbands. Back then it wasn't easy to get away from an abuser. The police would take them away sometimes, but the law wasn't much help.

We now have different kinds of abuse in law, including financial and emotional.

Men wouldn't go to the police back then, or leave for whatever reason.

Some did abandon their families, but most plodded on in awful relationships, because the help wasn't there.

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man
2 weeks ago

BRIDPORT

"It’s a throwaway society, that includes marriage.

The institution of marriage is not viewed with the same reverence as it once was, it is entered into lightly, with the knowledge you can bailout if you don’t like it.

I’m not advocating marriage in any of its forms, I would agree that it is becoming more and more irrelevant, I have never had any intentions of marriage myself, I was putting forward an opinion relevant to the question asked.

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By (user no longer on site)
2 weeks ago

I agree with some of them and can see how/why the yoof of today are less likely to stay together.

However, did it address the notion that marriage is hugely out of step with modern society, or that young people are not aware that marriage is actually a legal contract that can't be controlled?

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By *essaMayWoman
2 weeks ago

Fairytale Wood

Think divorce is easier these days. I do believe social media has a big part to play.

We are constantly being told there is a better life out there, not to.be satisfied with what we have, I'm not including staying in bad relationship.

Swinging as it used to be called is more mainstream, and more accessible, we are easily led with promises of great things, which turn out to be a dissapointed.

I look at other social media platform and it is so full of bitterness and anger. People believe too much in what others say rather than deciding for themselves.

A controlling relationship is not one where you can't do what you want, when you want, with who you want, because you want. If that's what you want a relationship not really what you want.

Being married to a true narcissist and not the same as a social media narcissist.

Relationships constantly evolve and do need work, people can't be bothered these days and always want easy. Quick to blame others for their own doings.

I say this because I am a just as guilty, cost me dearly.

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By *hagTonight OP Man
2 weeks ago

From the land of haribos.

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By *aitonelMan
2 weeks ago

Liverpool

Depends how you look at marriage, from a religious view, or a business deal view.

The religious one is horribly outdated and nothing more than tradition. Terribly worded contract conditions and stipulations.

Business deal often started with good intentions, sometimes rushed in to because of emotions and clouded judgement. However nobody should ever feel they should stay or be locked in to it. Even shamed for it.

I wish people thought about it much more before getting in to it, but honestly the younger ones once in it are sensible enough to get out when it's making life unhappy.

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By *eoBloomsMan
2 weeks ago

Springfield

Should be much harder to get married and much easier to get divorced.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
2 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

If the stats say that younger couples divorce more than older ones I'd believe it. I haven't looked into it though.

I think the biggest change is in the necessity of marriage.

Just a couple of generations ago a mother had to stay with a husband if she had kids as there was no way to support herself without him. Marriages were adhered to out of necessity than love in my mind.

The perception that marriage is forever and you stick it out regardless of if it eventually turns out that you loathe each other is a lot less common among the younger generations.

The thought process of I am a person and I deserve to be happy may be overtaking the I am a human and my purpose is to reproduce in the consciousness too.

I'm not afraid of commitment. But also I'm not willing to tolerate less than what I want and need from the people I adore just for the sake of it 💜

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By *vonne5exMan
2 weeks ago

Doncaster

"I don’t think I really agree with the points, not to say I don’t understand them.

I think, now, there’s less stigma around divorce. There’s a wider picture of divorce actually probably being better for all parties involved. Kids, your partner and yourself.

There’s more to it that just values and morals but health and happiness, too. "
Kids definitely suffer when parents divorce

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
2 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

"Kids definitely suffer when parents divorce"

Kids definitely suffer being raised in a home where their perception of a functioning adult relationship is two people who don't love or respect each other too 💜

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By *amie HantsWoman
2 weeks ago

Atlantis

"I don’t think I really agree with the points, not to say I don’t understand them.

I think, now, there’s less stigma around divorce. There’s a wider picture of divorce actually probably being better for all parties involved. Kids, your partner and yourself.

There’s more to it that just values and morals but health and happiness, too. Kids definitely suffer when parents divorce"

Kids also suffer growing up not knowing what a happy relationship looks like when the parents stay together out of obligation rather than love. Relationship breakdowns are hard and messy but walking away doesn’t mean it’s worse for the kids, a lot of the times it’s the kinder decision

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
2 weeks ago

Central

Depending on the age of people, it was probably more acceptable to stay within a relationship that wasn't perfect as well as to put up with more, in times past. Younger people have less experience too, so may not be as good at selection or working things out. You'd need proper research to understand this, not a light entertainment programme

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By *aitonelMan
2 weeks ago

Liverpool

"I don’t think I really agree with the points, not to say I don’t understand them.

I think, now, there’s less stigma around divorce. There’s a wider picture of divorce actually probably being better for all parties involved. Kids, your partner and yourself.

There’s more to it that just values and morals but health and happiness, too. Kids definitely suffer when parents divorce"

They suffer either way. Divorce is a much healthier environment than an unhappy home long term though. Yeah it's shit parents split up, it's much better than knowing one or both parents were extremely unhappy, and went through that unhappiness using myself as the excuse. The guilt associated with that is so much worse than any kind of stigma of divorced parents.

The more parents that realise that the better. Don't use your kids as an excuse for something you are afraid of doing but should have done.

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By *B69Woman
2 weeks ago

Wiltshire

I think a lot of it is down to many more women being financially independent today, in a lot of cases the woman is the higher earner now and don’t need to stay married.

Couples who have been together a long time were of the generation where the woman would give up her career to look after the family and home.

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By *ev257Man
2 weeks ago

cardiff

Youngsters are brought up with the attitude of we live in a throw away society.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
2 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

"Youngsters are brought up with the attitude of we live in a throw away society."

So long as they don't see their potential for happiness as something to throw away for the sake of a marriage that isn't working for them it's all good 💜

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By *aitonelMan
2 weeks ago

Liverpool

"Youngsters are brought up with the attitude of we live in a throw away society."

Or they have seen what their parents and grandparents (you) mistakes were and thought fuck that nonsense, I'll take my chances doing it my own way.

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By *ad NannaWoman
2 weeks ago

East London

What age group are we talking about?

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By *hagTonight OP Man
2 weeks ago

From the land of haribos.

[Removed by poster at 13/01/25 21:35:49]

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By *hagTonight OP Man
2 weeks ago

From the land of haribos.

"What age group are we talking about?

"
I am not sure, but I would think in their 30s and over 60s range too

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
2 weeks ago

North West

My Dad is 86 and has been married and divorced 4 times.

Something, something younger people. Blah blah.

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By *hagTonight OP Man
2 weeks ago

From the land of haribos.

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By *eavenscentitCouple
2 weeks ago

barnstaple

I got married at 21, did I know what I was doing - probably not but, I did love him and him me. I would not do it again because I no longer see it relevant to my life. If it had survived both our stupid behaviour it would have been fantastic. Ms

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