FabSwingers.com forum: Better at the sex: Part 1

By *enk15 OP Man
3 weeks ago

Evesham

As a mediocre shagger I've decided to embark on a quest to become better at the sex by putting forth sex surveys to you good folk!

Part 1: “And then I went and spoiled it all by saying something stupid like…”

Sex talk. What has someone whispered into your ear during the throes of passion that has made you throw them off of you or killed the mood? Just so I know what not to say

Please and thanks 😉

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By *osey WalesMan
3 weeks ago

Did you put the bins out ?

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By *osey WalesMan
3 weeks ago

"Did you put the bins out ?"

I laughed so much, it proper killed the mood

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By *avidretfordMan
3 weeks ago

retford

My MOT is due today

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By *adbod2godbodMan
3 weeks ago

Manchester

.....that was textbook intercourse

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By *cLovin2Man
3 weeks ago

Reading

The house is going to be repossessed today

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By *ags73Man
3 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

Mediocre?

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By *cLovin2Man
3 weeks ago

Reading

You know your mum's better at this

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By (user no longer on site)
3 weeks ago

You've not done anything on the sex to do list yet that you promised me

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By *enk15 OP Man
3 weeks ago

Evesham

"Did you put the bins out ?

I laughed so much, it proper killed the mood"

Did you put the bins out though?

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By *eeliciouschaosWoman
3 weeks ago

Wherever

„Cum for daddy”

🤢

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By *cLovin2Man
3 weeks ago

Reading

I've just signed us all up to become Mormons.

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By *enk15 OP Man
3 weeks ago

Evesham

"Mediocre?"

Yes. No judgement please.

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By *cLovin2Man
3 weeks ago

Reading

"„Cum for daddy”

🤢"

Would you prefer mummy?

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By *ags73Man
3 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"Mediocre?

Yes. No judgement please."

Self improvement bud.

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By *osey WalesMan
3 weeks ago

"Did you put the bins out ?

I laughed so much, it proper killed the mood

Did you put the bins out though?"

No, i dont think i had !

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By *enk15 OP Man
3 weeks ago

Evesham

"Mediocre?

Yes. No judgement please.

Self improvement bud."

I’ve been trying “self improvement” since I was 14… hasn’t gotten me far.

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By *enk15 OP Man
3 weeks ago

Evesham

"„Cum for daddy”

🤢"

*makes notes*

No daddy talk, got it.

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By (user no longer on site)
3 weeks ago

"My ex used to do that..."

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By *enk15 OP Man
3 weeks ago

Evesham

"I've just signed us all up to become Mormons.

Sounds pretty sexy to me…

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By *idnightcowboy69Man
3 weeks ago

ciren

Are you in yet?

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By *quirrel!Man
3 weeks ago

“Feel the wrath of Krull the warrior king, evil wench maiden”!

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By *ameisnawtyMan
3 weeks ago

anywhere

The results of that tests not back yet

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By *ags73Man
3 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"Mediocre?

Yes. No judgement please.

Self improvement bud.

I’ve been trying “self improvement” since I was 14… hasn’t gotten me far."

Good effort, but you’re probably doomed

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By *enk15 OP Man
3 weeks ago

Evesham

"“Feel the wrath of Krull the warrior king, evil wench maiden”!"

Wait… have we shagged?

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By *enk15 OP Man
3 weeks ago

Evesham

"Mediocre?

Yes. No judgement please.

Self improvement bud.

I’ve been trying “self improvement” since I was 14… hasn’t gotten me far.

Good effort, but you’re probably doomed "

Probably. Luckily I have an average personality to fall back on.

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By *quirrel!Man
3 weeks ago

"“Feel the wrath of Krull the warrior king, evil wench maiden”!

Wait… have we shagged?"

Wench? Is that you?

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By *ags73Man
3 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"Mediocre?

Yes. No judgement please.

Self improvement bud.

I’ve been trying “self improvement” since I was 14… hasn’t gotten me far.

Good effort, but you’re probably doomed

Probably. Luckily I have an average personality to fall back on."

Good good.

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By *enk15 OP Man
3 weeks ago

Evesham

"“Feel the wrath of Krull the warrior king, evil wench maiden”!

Wait… have we shagged?

Wench? Is that you?

I thought I recognised those nipples!!!

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By *elix SightedMan
3 weeks ago

Cloud 8

“That reminds me, I need to unclog the drains tomorrow.”

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By *riar BelisseWoman
3 weeks ago

Delightful Bliss

"You dirty cunt" made my vag tighten up and spit him out quicker than a bullet train...

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By *orny PTMan
3 weeks ago

Peterborough

What was that? Then scratch away at the pubes.

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By *enk15 OP Man
3 weeks ago

Evesham

"“That reminds me, I need to unclog the drains tomorrow.”"

Was this ⬇️ said after this ⬆️?

""You dirty cunt" made my vag tighten up and spit him out quicker than a bullet train..."

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By *enk15 OP Man
3 weeks ago

Evesham

"What was that? Then scratch away at the pubes."

Pube scratching was part of my aftercare routine, but I guess that’s out now 🙄

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By *oxy-RedWoman
3 weeks ago

pink panther territory

Did you let the cat in

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By *illie HardigainMan
3 weeks ago

Newport/Cardiff

Is it in yet ?

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By *illionsandbillionsMan
3 weeks ago

Gwent

"Have you got the heating on"

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By *enk15 OP Man
3 weeks ago

Evesham

"Did you let the cat in

Was it a euphemism?

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By *utieBootyPatootieWoman
3 weeks ago

Here or There abouts

"Where do you want daddies cummies babygirl?"

After that sentence, nowhere lol it was the word cummies that put me off more than anything 🤢

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By *enk15 OP Man
3 weeks ago

Evesham

""Have you got the heating on""

Oh that just sounds like you made them hotter than a jalapeño in a sauna wearing a winter coat.

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By *reggSausageMan
3 weeks ago

derby

What’s that squelchy noise

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By *a LunaWoman
3 weeks ago

South Wales

Asked if I fancied a FFM threesome.

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By *enk15 OP Man
3 weeks ago

Evesham

""Where do you want daddies cummies babygirl?"

After that sentence, nowhere lol it was the word cummies that put me off more than anything 🤢 "

Daddies

Cummies (this is a new one for me)

Babygirl

None of it sounds good.

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By *illionsandbillionsMan
3 weeks ago

Gwent

Either that or i did have it on lol

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By (user no longer on site)
3 weeks ago

Pss-pss-pss-pss

I don’t know what he was trying to summon. Poor guy.

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By *ortySwitchMan
3 weeks ago

london

"Asked if I fancied a FFM threesome.

Wel? Did you?

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By *ags73Man
3 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"Pss-pss-pss-pss

I don’t know what he was trying to summon. Poor guy. "

Like noises for a cat or something.

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By *icolasHidalgoDeCorazonMan
3 weeks ago

St Leonards

"But I really do think the Vimle will work better with the shape and light of the room than the Landskrona..."

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By *ffervescentMan
3 weeks ago

winfrith

someone called me by the wrong name once ,not good .

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By *nomeforyourboneWoman
3 weeks ago

Birmingham

Good girl, it's not cute.

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By *enk15 OP Man
3 weeks ago

Evesham

"Good girl, it's not cute."

I’ve turned off many a porn because the dude can’t stop saying this.

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By *cLovin2Man
3 weeks ago

Reading

I did tell you that I've got herpes...

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By (user no longer on site)
3 weeks ago

"someone called me by the wrong name once ,not good ."

Ah my ex did this, probably not wise on his part when his penis was near my mouth.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
3 weeks ago

East Sussex

"the police are coming to get you".

The guy turned very weird and the meet did not go well.

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By *midnight-Woman
3 weeks ago

...

Settled in for a BJ at the end of a 3-hour session and suddenly the guy gets all chatty and asks are you really your fab age?? It gave me the giggles, so I sat up and said oh do you just want to have a chat instead

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By *aitonelMan
3 weeks ago

Liverpool

"someone called me by the wrong name once ,not good .

Ah my ex did this, probably not wise on his part when his penis was near my mouth.

Becky is not that difficult to remember

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By *enk15 OP Man
3 weeks ago

Evesham

""the police are coming to get you".

The guy turned very weird and the meet did not go well. "

And there was no role play involved?

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By *ulieScrumptiousWoman
3 weeks ago

North West

""But I really do think the Vimle will work better with the shape and light of the room than the Landskrona...""

That's the sort of thing I might say. 🫣🤣

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By *icolasHidalgoDeCorazonMan
3 weeks ago

St Leonards

""But I really do think the Vimle will work better with the shape and light of the room than the Landskrona..."

That's the sort of thing I might say. 🫣🤣"

You realised you've just crushed my fantasies about you Julie 😥😭😫

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By *cLovin2Man
3 weeks ago

Reading

The ceiling needs painting...

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By *ags73Man
3 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"The ceiling needs painting..."

That’s positive though as she’s on top.

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By *enk15 OP Man
3 weeks ago

Evesham

"The ceiling needs painting..."

That’s just an invitation for some painting sex up a ladder.

2 birds 1 stone.

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By *oubleSwingCouple
3 weeks ago

N. Wales

He said "BOOM" for a laugh, while he was inside me. I think it was a quote from a film we'd just watched. We laughed so much, it killed it for a while. I just could not stop thinking about it and giggling 🙈

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By *ai Hard 2 - Dai HarderMan
3 weeks ago

Manchester / Cardiff

Two times in my life I have been in the throws and their husband/partner have come home early/unannounced. I don't remember the exact wording but needless to say, on both occasions, what was said at that point definitely killed the mood.

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