FabSwingers.com forum: Nice or a bastard?

By *oppabear82 OP Man
2 weeks ago

near you

Why is it if you send a message to someone and you are courteous and say hello, read their profile and try to strike up a conversation you get no reply.

Should I now just start being a bastard and blunt?

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By *oxy-RedWoman
2 weeks ago

pink panther territory

"Why is it if you send a message to someone and you are courteous and say hello, read their profile and try to strike up a conversation you get no reply.

Should I now just start being a bastard and blunt?

No op,stay nice and courteous

Merry Christmas 😊

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By *issolvedOrdersMan
2 weeks ago

Bristol

Maybe you’re already a bastard and that’s why they don’t reply? I jest

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
2 weeks ago

East Sussex

Which is your true personality? Be that

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By (user no longer on site)
2 weeks ago

If people like you, they'll reply.

Simple

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By *un guy300Man
2 weeks ago

Carmarthen

"Why is it if you send a message to someone and you are courteous and say hello, read their profile and try to strike up a conversation you get no reply.

Should I now just start being a bastard and blunt? Yes agree x

No op,stay nice and courteous

Merry Christmas 😊"

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By *oppabear82 OP Man
2 weeks ago

near you

I've been told I'm too nice.....

But everyone knows ladies love the bad boy, hence why I'm screwed. Or more apt Not! Haha

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By *atandjayCouple
2 weeks ago

Brighton

Always be nice

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By *o_yeur_eyes_onlyMan
2 weeks ago

Londontown

I think couples and women on here get ALOT of messages, so your messages are likely ending up up at the bottom of the deep, dark abyss.

Don't take it personally, be yourself and try someone else who catches your eye.....

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By *rPunxMan
2 weeks ago

Hull

I can be both... just saying 😉

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By *C44Man
2 weeks ago

Ipswich

I'm a below average looking guy with a shit profile. I get maybe 10-20 messages a day from mostly men even though my profile says I'm not interested in men.

I genuinely would love to reply to each and every one thanking them for their interest (it is flattering) but that's 30 mins to an hour of my day sending messages that will go nowhere.

Now imagine how many messages a woman who you find attractive gets in a day! It's going to be an administrative nightmare that consumes their whole day. It's unreasonable to expect a reply, just be grateful for the ones you do get

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By *antasdeerideMan
2 weeks ago

winfrith

"Why is it if you send a message to someone and you are courteous and say hello, read their profile and try to strike up a conversation you get no reply.

Should I now just start being a bastard and blunt?

"
Nope that is unfortunately what many do ,you are best to ignore the ignorers and move on ,if you are worthy of something/anything you will get it eventually, if your whole focus is on sex ,you send sexual messages to strangers from the get go ,you may be in the wrong place ,be nice, be disinterested but above all be a gent at all times .

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By *egoMan
2 weeks ago

Preston

You know the answer, they aren't interested, move on.

So many abusive messages on fab, you aren't owed anything.

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By *ellinever70Woman
2 weeks ago

Ayrshire

"I've been told I'm too nice.....

But everyone knows ladies love the bad boy, hence why I'm screwed. Or more apt Not! Haha"

I think this is just a convenient lie guys tell themselves when a woman doesn't want to have sex with them

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By *oppabear82 OP Man
2 weeks ago

near you

"You know the answer, they aren't interested, move on.

So many abusive messages on fab, you aren't owed anything."

I do move on.

I was only asking a question. And as for abusive messages. I'm the one that gets the odd reply with an abusive message back. I don't send them.

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By *nkymikeyMan
2 weeks ago

Andover

It's a numbers game. Be yourself and just move on to the next.

Next please!

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
2 weeks ago

East Sussex

"I'm a below average looking guy with a shit profile. I get maybe 10-20 messages a day from mostly men even though my profile says I'm not interested in men.

I genuinely would love to reply to each and every one thanking them for their interest (it is flattering) but that's 30 mins to an hour of my day sending messages that will go nowhere.

You can block men from messaging via mail filters

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By *lowupdollTV/TS
2 weeks ago

Herts/Beds/Lomdon

Define ‘courteous’.

Some messages read like Alan Titchmarsh offering anal fisting tbf. They’re courteous. But somehow just odd.

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By *AYENCouple
2 weeks ago

Lincolnshire

"Why is it if you send a message to someone and you are courteous and say hello, read their profile and try to strike up a conversation you get no reply.

Should I now just start being a bastard and blunt?

Fab is mostly about instant attraction. If you're a single man and you're a 9 or a 10 you'll do well on here, if you're a 7 or 8 you might get lucky, below that you need to start preying to one or more of the many gods available. K.

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By *luebutterflyCouple
2 weeks ago

sphincter on sea

Fab's own FAQ say, no response is a response. It's a sorry not interested. Just move on.

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By *a LunaWoman
2 weeks ago

South Wales

"I've been told I'm too nice.....

But everyone knows ladies love the bad boy, hence why I'm screwed. Or more apt Not! Haha"

I don’t like a bad boy. I have no time for drama.

I don’t like it when men have a pity party for one either just cos they’re not knee deep in Clunge!

You won’t be for everyone, so stop trying.

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By *rchitectMan
2 weeks ago

Dorchester

If you were a woman and you got 1000 messages would you really respond to everyone. It’s a lottery on FAB.

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By *a1970Man
2 weeks ago

East cork

Stay nice..... Do not be sucked in... Rise above it

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By *ags73Man
2 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"Why is it if you send a message to someone and you are courteous and say hello, read their profile and try to strike up a conversation you get no reply.

Should I now just start being a bastard and blunt?

No. Be yourself OP.

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
2 weeks ago

Manchester-ish

We get quite a few pizza menus through our door from various local takeaways. Most are very well designed, they've obviously done their marketing, understand the types of pizza topping and side dishes people like and have crafted their menus accordingly.

Almost 100% of the time, I'm not hungry, or if I am, I'm not in the mood for pizza* so those menus just sit there on the porch floor, I know they are there but I'm not going to read through them all, then call each one to discuss the options in the hope that it will put me in the mood for some luke warm, cheesy, greasy filth.

In fact, if I'm going to have pizza, I'll probably decide on a day to go to a venue, where there's lots of other types of food, and I know the the type of pizza I fancy will be available. I might get to eat the pizza there and then, sometimes I take it home, stick it in the freezer and eat it at a mutually convenient time.

*Who are we kidding 😂

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By *eroLondonMan
2 weeks ago

Mayfair

"Why is it if you send a message to someone"

Don't. Cease and desist. It's a pointless exercise. They're all mediocre here anyway.

"and you are courteous and say hello, read their profile"

You need to read their profile •before• saying hello.

"...and try to strike up a conversation you get no reply."

Most women on here can't even strike a pose.

"Should I now just start being a bastard and blunt?"

Double your efforts, OP. Be yourself.

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By *ulieScrumptiousWoman
2 weeks ago

North West

I don't really want or have time to strike up a load of conversations. I want someone to properly read my profile and say "Hello Julie, TITORGASM soundd like an excellent way to see if we have in person chemistry. When are you next at a group social?". But they never say that so my filters are closed most of the time.

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By *ooBulMan
2 weeks ago

Missin’ Yo’ Kissin’

Never be something you are not! Carry on as you are - Keep moving forward.

If I send a message I try to stand out... I'm the male equivalent of a whacky chic. So, I know I've got a 50/50 % chance of her replying.... If she does, then she does. I also send a message and delete it. That way it comes as a complete surprise if she does reply!

Fortune always favours the brave.

Think about joining a club near you in the new year perhaps?

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By *partharmonyCouple
2 weeks ago

Ruislip

"I've been told I'm too nice.....

But everyone knows ladies love the bad boy, hence why I'm screwed. Or more apt Not! Haha"

Are you told you are too nice by the people who don't respond and that's why they aren't responding?

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By *cLovin2Man
2 weeks ago

Reading

"Why is it if you send a message to someone and you are courteous and say hello, read their profile and try to strike up a conversation you get no reply.

Should I now just start being a bastard and blunt?

The short answer is there is like 500 guys on here for every woman. Bastard or polite, it's unlikely that you will beat those odds. Unless you look like brad Pitt & have the wit of Oscar Wilde, with the eloquence of Laurence Olivier. Just be nice, be yourself and don't expect things in return.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
2 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

Are those the only options? Saccharine nice or raging arsehole?

Just be you bro. Which side of the spectrum that falls on 💜

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By *ags73Man
2 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"Are those the only options? Saccharine nice or raging arsehole?

Just be you bro. Which side of the spectrum that falls on 💜"

Yeah it doesn’t have to be as stark as one or the other, being nice and polite doesn’t mean being a doormat

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
2 weeks ago

Glasgow / London

I’m a nice bastard, sometimes.

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By *erry bull1Man
2 weeks ago

doncaster

"Why is it if you send a message to someone and you are courteous and say hello, read their profile and try to strike up a conversation you get no reply.

Should I now just start being a bastard and blunt?

"
just accept it

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By *aron Von RingsplitterMan
2 weeks ago

Mottram St Andrew

As I teach anyone new to tellesales, you have no right of a reply and to assume you do is entitled arrogance. Your message wasn't invited and is an interruption or imposition. Accept that and assume humility and you'll go a lot further.

Most women seem to be bombarded so assume you're just lost in the noise and they'll get back to you if interested.

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By *ourtney CocksWoman
2 weeks ago

Cardiff

"I’m a nice bastard, sometimes."
he is

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By *inger_SnapWoman
2 weeks ago

Hampshire/Dorset

"I've been told I'm too nice.....

But everyone knows ladies love the bad boy, hence why I'm screwed. Or more apt Not! Haha"

That's simply not true, for all women.

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By *tsJustKateWoman
2 weeks ago

London

"Why is it if you send a message to someone and you are courteous and say hello, read their profile and try to strike up a conversation you get no reply.

Should I now just start being a bastard and blunt?

Just be grown up about it and just move on.

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By *he turned me GreyCouple
2 weeks ago

Warwick and Coventry

Always be a bastard op....but remember this......your one bastard swimming in a sea of bastards, so make sure your bastardness out shines others bastardness...be a better bastard

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By *ulieScrumptiousWoman
2 weeks ago

North West

Further to my post above...

Nice is the minimum. Too nice doesn't exist. Being a doormat and thinking you're being nice exists, being perfomatively nice so others think you're nice exists. But actually genuinely nice, that's my favourite and you can't be toouch of that.

And you can be the nicest person in the world but if I don't fancy you then we ain't shagging. 😂

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By *ulieScrumptiousWoman
2 weeks ago

North West

Too much. ^^

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By *eroLondonMan
2 weeks ago

Mayfair

She ^ didn't use the word "really" that many times, this time.

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By *ags73Man
2 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"Always be a bastard op....but remember this......your one bastard swimming in a sea of bastards, so make sure your bastardness out shines others bastardness...be a better bastard

Mr "

Or a nice bastard.

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By *eordieJeansCouple
2 weeks ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

Nice guys finish last. Be a bastard.

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By *oppet22TV/TS
2 weeks ago

huddersfield

No just take it and be polite

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By *ildo_swagginsthe3rdWoman
2 weeks ago

Wales

"Always be a bastard op....but remember this......your one bastard swimming in a sea of bastards, so make sure your bastardness out shines others bastardness...be a better bastard

Mr "

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By *ildo_swagginsthe3rdWoman
2 weeks ago

Wales

🤣

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By *abtastic Mr FoxMan
2 weeks ago

A den in the Glen

Sounds like you're not being bastardly enough. Go full on turbo nuclear bastardcunt.

If that fails, dick pic.

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By *rsMistyPeaksWoman
2 weeks ago

Essex

"Why is it if you send a message to someone and you are courteous and say hello, read their profile and try to strike up a conversation you get no reply.

Should I now just start being a bastard and blunt?

Just be you.

Don’t be polite just for replies

Don’t be a bad boy to get some clunge.

Don’t be courteous out of a sense of duty.

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By *hampersDarlingWoman
2 weeks ago

Norwich

People have their types and they're entitled to that. I don't get many messages but if white males send me messages, which they often do, I sometimes reply with read my profile or just delete their message.

I don't take it personally if somebody doesn't reply to me either they have their types too.

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By *ife NinjaMan
2 weeks ago

Dunfermline

There's enough bastards already. Be a gent. Patience is key

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By *erfHerder74Man
2 weeks ago

Inverclyde

Some of us like the nice guys

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
2 weeks ago

Cheshire

Not sure if it’s been answered but if someone ignores your message, you’ve had an answer.

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By *herrybakewellCouple
2 weeks ago

Staffordshire

If they were interested, they would reply.

Sometimes, no reply is the kindest way.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
2 weeks ago

Central

If you're not compatible, you should not expect a reply. If you're a bastard, it's unlikely that it's going to magically make you compatible.

Your expectations are your own creation. You might as well make them realistic

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