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"Their bumhole didn't squeak the Spiderpig song. " Even if it’s a bumpussy? I would ¥ in an indecent proposal style arrangement. | |||
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"Their bumhole didn't squeak the Spiderpig song. Even if it’s a bumpussy? I would ¥ in an indecent proposal style arrangement. " I like that xx
I'd shag the person below, if only they stopped insisting I shag all their best friends too  . | |||
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"They weren’t so far away. I’m sure there must be a fab term coined for this conundrum. Mrs TMN x" I think it's called the Fab conundrum! I'd shag the person below if only they'd stop eating fish fillets during coitus. | |||
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I'd fuck the person below I'd they weren't so far out my league *sigh | |||
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"Distance is so unfair
I'd fuck the person below I'd they weren't so far out my league *sigh"No one's out of anyone's league young lady x. I'd shag the person below, if only their bumpussy flaps were disconnected from the National Grid for 20 minutes   . | |||
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"I'd shag the person below, if only for the sunshine, moonlight, good times." I’d blame it on the boogie. But I’d be lying. It’d be the boaby. | |||
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"If they give me a lift to shop afterwards " I've got a car, big boy, and the back seats flip down. Just saying... So, I'd shag the person before if it weren't for their habit of reciting Poe while doing you from behind. And that bloody raven keeps shittimg all over my bedroom! 😟 | |||
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"Sorry about that! If they are ok with minimal effort and buying me a McDonald’s afterwards, for the inconvenience. " Deal 👍🏻 I’d engage in lewd acts with the person below me if only they’d send me a video of themselves standing atop a washing machine wearing nothing but a top hat and cane….whilst tap dancing… | |||
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"Sorry about that! If they are ok with minimal effort and buying me a McDonald’s afterwards, for the inconvenience. Deal 👍🏻 I’d engage in lewd acts with the person below me if only they’d send me a video of themselves standing atop a washing machine wearing nothing but a top hat and cane….whilst tap dancing…" Again Sensual? What was wrong with the first 3? I'd shag the person below me, if only they cleared the slugs off their sexy bits. | |||
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"They're leeches, actually. It's how I drain the blood when it all gets a bit too engorged from being turned on so much. I'd cavort carnally with the person below if only they had a bag of dolly mixture and a photo of Eva Green..." I will bring the Dolly Mixture 😘 | |||
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"They're leeches, actually. It's how I drain the blood when it all gets a bit too engorged from being turned on so much. I'd cavort carnally with the person below if only they had a bag of dolly mixture and a photo of Eva Green... I will bring the Dolly Mixture 😘" I will shag the person below if I don't have to shave my legs | |||
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"They're leeches, actually. It's how I drain the blood when it all gets a bit too engorged from being turned on so much. I'd cavort carnally with the person below if only they had a bag of dolly mixture and a photo of Eva Green... I will bring the Dolly Mixture 😘 I will shag the person below if I don't have to shave my legs" Done, Id shag the person below if they bring the lord of the ring trilogy with them. | |||
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"They're leeches, actually. It's how I drain the blood when it all gets a bit too engorged from being turned on so much. I'd cavort carnally with the person below if only they had a bag of dolly mixture and a photo of Eva Green... I will bring the Dolly Mixture 😘 I will shag the person below if I don't have to shave my legs" Deal 😁 I will shag the person below if they make lunch | |||
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"They didn't have an Octopus for a wife." Are you psychic? 
I'd shag the person below me, only if they'd let me knob their left nostril too.
That's my left, not theirs. | |||
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"Their name is Victoria " That can be arranged. They don't have hairy feet | |||
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"They can sing opera when they orgasm" I love a cosy fanny, is that close enough ?
I would shag the person below me, if only they didn't get those really long nails and teeth every full moon. | |||
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"They moisturise everyday" Which I do
If they kiss passionately. | |||
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"They moisturise everyday Which I do
If they kiss passionately. "How well do I kiss? I don’t know | |||
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"They moisturise everyday Which I do
If they kiss passionately.
How well do I kiss? I don’t know "People don't kiss and tell | |||
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"Yhere not wonko " bend over big boy | |||
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"I would shag the person below... if she bloody woke up!! Would be arrestable otherwise " You have my permission I'd shaggy the person below if they didn't mind getting the booby prize (,y,) | |||
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"I would shag the person below... if she bloody woke up!! Would be arrestable otherwise You have my permission I'd shaggy the person below if they didn't mind getting the booby prize (,y,)" They were half as good looking as the person above… | |||
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"They had a vagina "for you we could true
If they dressed in fishnets | |||
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"I would!" I wish | |||
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"I wish " Is my command | |||
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"They didn’t have long toenails " Their nipples didn't wink at me x | |||
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"They didn’t have long toenails Their nipples didn't wink at me x" Their flares and wide lapels didn’t get in the way xxx | |||
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"They didn’t have long toenails Their nipples didn't wink at me x Their flares and wide lapels didn’t get in the way xxx" They would let me be in the pics | |||
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"If they came to fix the washing machine first" But then you would be a clean pair and not a dirty pair | |||
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"I'd definitely shag the person below me if they cleaned the bogies off their curtains first. I only wipe my knob on clean(ish) curtains 😤." Only if they stop flicking bogies at my nice clean curtains | |||
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"I'd definitely shag the person below me if they cleaned the bogies off their curtains first. I only wipe my knob on clean(ish) curtains 😤. Only if they stop flicking bogies at my nice clean curtains" It was either the curtains or the bedding | |||
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"Well, I'm hungry when I wake up. 🤷♀️ I'd shag the person below if only they'd renounce all worldly possessions and let me lead them around while they wore a sloth suit and a spiky collar with the name "Fifi" on it. "Is the suit fuchsia with gold glitter? In 👊. I'd shag the person below, if only their vagina hadn't sealed itself up through under use 🤷. | |||
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"I'd shag the person below if only they weren't set to go off like a nuclear bomb after 30 seconds " Excuse me …. I can last at least a minute … | |||
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"I'd happily shag the person below if only they weren't so busy!" For you I’m sure any busy person would make time | |||
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" I'd happily shag the person below if only they weren’t attending the AGM of the Donald Trump trumps appreciation society. " Fids I’ll give up my Trump loving antics for you
I’ll shag the person below if they put their Ballbag in my mouth | |||
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I'll shag the person below if they have a ford fiesta!! | |||
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I'll shag the person below if they have a ford fiesta!! "Mine is smaller than that. I would shag the person below if they bring the chat. | |||
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"
I'll shag the person below if they have a ford fiesta!!
Mine is smaller than that.
I would shag the person below if they bring the chat."Okay I can do that. Id they can bring me a lovely milkshake | |||
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I'll shag the person below if they have a ford fiesta!!
Mine is smaller than that.
I would shag the person below if they bring the chat.
Okay I can do that.
Id they can bring me a lovely milkshake"I know where to find the best chocolate milkshake in London I'd if they are good at dirty talk using telepathy | |||
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"Did you pick up my latest thought transmission? Can breathe through their ears and treat me with respect." No problem. If they can last for 3 hours 😜 | |||
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"Did you pick up my latest thought transmission? Can breathe through their ears and treat me with respect. No problem. If they can last for 3 hours 😜" They had the tits of the poster above me! | |||
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"If they can last for 3 hours 😜 They had the tits of the poster above me!" If one or more of their veris had urged me to not miss out! | |||
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"They don't mind me eating pigs in blankets while they lick my pussy" I've got some downstairs! They come over and watch lord of the rings with me. | |||
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"They don't mind me eating pigs in blankets while they lick my pussy I've got some downstairs! They come over and watch lord of the rings with me. "Now you're Tolkien sunshine .
I would humpity-hump the human below,
If only their bottom didn't burp so | |||
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"They'd let me say "Jim's Mum" with every thrust, and I could bellow "GORGONZOLA!" when I came. Ta muchly 😘💜💙." Yeah, whatever, I'd wear ear plugs anyway. I'd shag the person below if only they'd sing the theme to "The Love Boat" while I bounced up and down on them. 🛳 | |||
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"Dear god just no" If he wasn't so judgemental | |||
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"Dear god just no If he wasn't so judgemental " I got this! xx | |||
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"If she said please. " If I can play with their Lego | |||
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"If she said please. If I can play with their Lego "Deal - as long as your nips are Lego-connectable Titzy 😘. I'd absolutely shag the person below, if only they could gargle my jizz to the Mission Impossible theme? | |||
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"If she said please. If I can play with their Lego
Deal - as long as your nips are Lego-connectable Titzy 😘.
I'd absolutely shag the person below, if only they could gargle my jizz to the Mission Impossible theme?"I'll try mate I'll try I'll shag yhe person below if they can bring some snacks with them. | |||
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"If she said please. If I can play with their Lego
Deal - as long as your nips are Lego-connectable Titzy 😘.
I'd absolutely shag the person below, if only they could gargle my jizz to the Mission Impossible theme?"Can only do it to the flight of the bumble bee 😂 I'd absolutely shag the person below, if they beat me in a game of thumb wars blindfolded | |||
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"I'll shag the person below if they can give me a hand finishing off my painting! 👍 Deal? "My home decorating skills are a little....idiosyncratic. You'll regret this! I WOULD shag the person below, if only Chris Rea finally made it home and we could all stop worrying about him. | |||
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"I'll shag the person below if they can give me a hand finishing off my painting! 👍 Deal?
My home decorating skills are a little....idiosyncratic. You'll regret this!
I WOULD shag the person below, if only Chris Rea finally made it home and we could all stop worrying about him."... ... Chris rea isn't making it home .. he took a wrong turning and is now on the road to hell... I'd shag the person below if only they would shag me right after it ... | |||
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I don't get it... you can't Say why you would or wouldn't shaggy the person below because you can't see who's going to be below you  and it can't be a mistake because it's in capital letters BELOW, am I being slow here | |||
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" I don't get it... you can't Say why you would or wouldn't shaggy the person below because you can't see who's going to be below you and it can't be a mistake because it's in capital letters BELOW, am I being slow here "I wouldn't shag him ⬆️ as he's too slow but the person below if they are quicker and a woman. | |||
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"If they bring the malteasers" See pics. I have Maltesers but also a penis Has a crate of real ale handy. | |||
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"If they bring the malteasers See pics. I have Maltesers but also a penis Has a crate of real ale handy." The penis is unimportant as long as you have maltesers. I have some craft beers but no real ales. Doesn't mind me watching countdown while we do the deed. | |||
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"If they bring the malteasers See pics. I have Maltesers but also a penis Has a crate of real ale handy. The penis is unimportant as long as you have maltesers. I have some craft beers but no real ales. Doesn't mind me watching countdown while we do the deed. " If the deed is eating Maltesers and watching the Rachel Riley version whilst drinking Brewdog. In. Not having a cock helps. | |||
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"They can burp the alphabet " I get stuck at J Can help me complete today's crossword | |||
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"They could do a double Pirouette" If they could pirouette in that open bodysuit 😊 | |||
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"They wernt a couple" Oh . hey
If they playbattleships with me. | |||
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"They wernt a couple" If they were Not so far away in the north east | |||
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"They can burp the alphabet " *I've pulled 💥💥. And I can burp it backwards too. I have skills. *not in one breath though - only Vikings/Geordies can do that, obvs .
I would shag the person below, if only they cleaned their bumpussy a little more attentively 😬. | |||
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