FabSwingers.com forum: A very serious question about libido.

By *opsy Rogers OP Woman
over a year ago

London

Mine went AWOL weeks and weeks ago and I miss it. I hear gentle sobbing in the dark from my dear friend, Magic Wand, because she has been abandoned under my bed and is suffering separation anxiety.

Tell me it's coming back please? Is there anything I can do?

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Could be to do with hormonal changes, could be to do with being a little fed up in another area of life - try and remember when you last had and what that was like?

Also, libido is one thing but it needs more than the image of a bloke to make things happen I think. Maybe you are not sufficiently stimulated? Just a thought?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are you stressed, on new meds, run down from this ridiculously long winter, dehydrated, on a new eating regime....?? This and many more reasons....

Take a long look at your life for changes to patterns, identify, resolve... Job done....

Oh the joys of being simplistic...

, but actually quite serious....

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By *opsy Rogers OP Woman
over a year ago

London

The problem arises when the thought of actually getting to the point of trying a little kissy kissy makes me want to have another cup of coffee. I know my hormones are ok though.

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By *opsy Rogers OP Woman
over a year ago

London

I've actually got some really lovely stuff happening in my life right now. The sun is out, I have a smile on my face and I feel as horny as a bowl of dry spaghetti.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The problem arises when the thought of actually getting to the point of trying a little kissy kissy makes me want to have another cup of coffee. I know my hormones are ok though.

Sounds like Aphrodite is nearer the mark then... You may need something new to stimulate you...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've actually got some really lovely stuff happening in my life right now. The sun is out, I have a smile on my face and I feel as horny as a bowl of dry spaghetti.

You need more kebabs and for them to be delivererd by a man in an Italian car!

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

I know of a few friends who went through menopause early that they experienced a brief time of lacking libido but it did come back in every case.

TBH I sometimes prefer a glass of wine to the thought of sex and I think most people do (not necessarily prefer the wine but not have sex as a priority). Sometimes I think being on this site can make us think that everybody else has a 110% libido all the time and I somehow think that is as untrue as the notion that everybody else has sex 5 times a day.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

serious suggestion, forget about it! I don't mean forever but give yourself a hoilday from wondering where its gone and how to get it back...say a month and then if you still aren't drifting off to sleep to the accompaniment of serious fantasies look deeper.

Good luck

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By *opsy Rogers OP Woman
over a year ago

London

I love you guys.

Recently, I spent the night snuggled up to one of my lovely friends here and what happened? I went to sleep.

It feels like it will return and I'm ever hopeful but can someone sprinkle a little libido fairy dust my way please?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I love you guys.

Recently, I spent the night snuggled up to one of my lovely friends here and what happened? I went to sleep.

It feels like it will return and I'm ever hopeful but can someone sprinkle a little libido fairy dust my way please? "

I'm sure that person respects you and fully understands...

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"I love you guys.

Recently, I spent the night snuggled up to one of my lovely friends here and what happened? I went to sleep.

It feels like it will return and I'm ever hopeful but can someone sprinkle a little libido fairy dust my way please? "

I wonder whether the mere expectation that you "ought" to feel a particular way is a kind of self imposed pressure and that is a turn off for many. I also wonder if somebody (you know and trust) could just give you a nice massage and you both know that is all it is... and see how that might make you feel?

I am just trying to think of different perspectives... and one that keeps coming back to my mind is the essential lack of (mental) stimulation - it is so often the key to "more".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never lose my libido but last year mine vanished for about 3 months for no reason that I could think of!! It knocked me for six at the time but it came back and I soon hopped back in the saddle!

Just enjoy everything else going on in your life and don't worry about it...you will be rampant again before you know it!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

just don't think about it ....... could be whats doing it ....... you thinking you should be doing this and that ....... just be you and be happy .

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By *pecifically1Woman
over a year ago

Hull

I wonder whether the mere expectation that you "ought" to feel a particular way is a kind of self imposed pressure and that is a turn off for many. "

Absolutely correct....The expectation is often the libido killer

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

Have a lie in and get someone to do your housework and cook your tea. That's the advice Dear Deirdre always gives.

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By *opsy Rogers OP Woman
over a year ago

London

I remember her well.

Good advice Ryan, which bit do you want to do? I have a list of things that need doing, someone could massage me in bed whilst everybody else does the work! As a reward, you lot could use the rest of the house to shag in as long as somebody keeps me in coffee.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Mine went AWOL weeks and weeks ago and I miss it. I hear gentle sobbing in the dark from my dear friend, Magic Wand, because she has been abandoned under my bed and is suffering separation anxiety.

Tell me it's coming back please? Is there anything I can do? "

Had it all last year and had sex once in 12 months, yes once and had no solo play either

It will pass mine did eventually

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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

I lost all interest in sex when caring for my mum. Understandable but it did concern me whether it would return or not. I also had bad fibroids.

I was put on the mirena coil and was warned this can also affect libido. I decided to take exercise, eat better, lose weight, and took supplements like horny goats and Maca. In the event, once I got my health in check I was fine. Actually, I became rampant, and still am. I thought once I hit 50 that would be it but I'm more horny now than I ever was in my 30s and I was pretty bad then!!

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

I can Hoover if that's any good?

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By *opsy Rogers OP Woman
over a year ago

London

Thanks Choccy, it's good to hear positive stories.

My health is good and I may just look into supplements to boost my sex drive.

Ryan, you'll have to bring a Hoover, my Dyson is on its last but can you nip over before my new carpet is laid down? That way, you lot can shag on a not so gritty surface.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thanks Choccy, it's good to hear positive stories.

My health is good and I may just look into supplements to boost my sex drive.

Ryan, you'll have to bring a Hoover, my Dyson is on its last but can you nip over before my new carpet is laid down? That way, you lot can shag on a not so gritty surface. "

You forgot paint stained

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By *opsy Rogers OP Woman
over a year ago

London

Trust you you expose my standard of living! They should be thankful to get any carpet, but at least if 'other' stains are left it won't matter.

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

her indoors has zero libido.. i think its trauma from radical hysterectomy .. just does not want anything sexual at all . maybe the trauma of dealing with your mothers situation brought on the same thing . hope you get your mojo back ... at least your worried about it x

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"her indoors has zero libido.. i think its trauma from radical hysterectomy .. just does not want anything sexual at all . maybe the trauma of dealing with your mothers situation brought on the same thing . hope you get your mojo back ... at least your worried about it x"

I would guess that a radical hysterectomy would have something to do with it. It must have been an awful thing to deal with physically and emotionally.

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