FabSwingers.com forum: Single men of the forum. How much effort do you put into trying to get meets from Fab specifically?

By *ymClassDropout OP Man
14 weeks ago

Berkshire

I tend to rely on parties and the occasional club visit for my meets. Also dating apps as they seem to work surprisingly well for me for NSA type meets.

I think I have a lot of offer. I look after myself physically. I am articulate. I look okay.

However I find trying to instigate a meet from here is just very difficult. I do all of the ‘correct’ things but harbouring any genuine interest seems to be difficult.

I have had one meet where I was the instigator. Even then I felt like I was the ‘plan B’ option.

So please don't interpret this as a ‘feel sorry’ for me thread as it’s genuinely not. Like I have said I do okay.

I am just curious how other single blokes find it on fab ?

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By *ags73Man
14 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

Im trying to do clubs and socials.

Messaging locally seems a waste of time.

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By *vonne5exMan
14 weeks ago

Doncaster

"I tend to rely on parties and the occasional club visit for my meets. Also dating apps as they seem to work surprisingly well for me for NSA type meets.

I think I have a lot of offer. I look after myself physically. I am articulate. I look okay.

However I find trying to instigate a meet from here is just very difficult. I do all of the ‘correct’ things but harbouring any genuine interest seems to be difficult.

I have had one meet where I was the instigator. Even then I felt like I was the ‘plan B’ option.

So please don't interpret this as a ‘feel sorry’ for me thread as it’s genuinely not. Like I have said I do okay.

I am just curious how other single blokes find it on fab ?"
totally agree I can go into town and pull a lot easier, I also love that first eye contact, why am I on here, because the naughtiness is so exciting and the social side is brilliant, I've gone to Quest often just to have a chat.

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By (user no longer on site)
14 weeks ago

These days none

I got the message that I'm unmeetable many years ago

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By *hrek101Man
14 weeks ago

Herts

I put none in unless someone suggests they might be interested...which is no one 🤣🤣🤣

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By *illy IdolMan
14 weeks ago

Midlands

When I was meeting, I found the more effort I put in, the more successful I were at finding potentially compatible women. A decent profile, good pictures and being positive/proactive on the forums made a huge difference on the amount of messages I would receive.

I also have age on my side which seems to help.

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By *rHotNottsMan
14 weeks ago

Dubai & Nottingham

I do like the place on here & put the effort in to regularly meet people after anything like 3 months to 3 years!

But I also like the thrill of a pulling on a night out out or group social., it’s different. Clubs would be my least favourite , feel like a piece of meat !

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By *NormalMan01Man
14 weeks ago

Harrogate

None. Wouldn’t make a difference either way 😂😂

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By *electableicecreamMan
14 weeks ago

The West

"I tend to rely on parties and the occasional club visit for my meets. Also dating apps as they seem to work surprisingly well for me for NSA type meets.

I think I have a lot of offer. I look after myself physically. I am articulate. I look okay.

However I find trying to instigate a meet from here is just very difficult. I do all of the ‘correct’ things but harbouring any genuine interest seems to be difficult.

I have had one meet where I was the instigator. Even then I felt like I was the ‘plan B’ option.

So please don't interpret this as a ‘feel sorry’ for me thread as it’s genuinely not. Like I have said I do okay.

I am just curious how other single blokes find it on fab ?"

My experience is pretty much the same as yours.

In terms of fab the effort I make is in keeping my profile fresh and having the craic in the Irish forum. It's a much smaller community in Ireland so engaging there carries into the social seen quite well.

It's very rare I'd send a message.

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By *NormalMan01Man
14 weeks ago

Harrogate

"None. Wouldn’t make a difference either way 😂😂"

I’m joking, obviously. But I put in what’s reciprocated and I think that’s all you can ask.

There’s very little to no point putting effort in to some one who gives short, sharp answers.

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By *eeliciouschaosWoman
14 weeks ago

Wherever

This is a really long title.

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By *inceIlkestonMan
14 weeks ago

Ilkeston

"These days none

I got the message that I'm unmeetable many years ago "

I used to get meets, these days I rather stay home with wine and Netflix than piss about on here day and night.

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By *gent CoulsonMan
14 weeks ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

Since I hit 60, I found there wasn't much point.

So very little effort now

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By *onnyGibbMan
14 weeks ago

Peterborough

Right now, I'm not putting in any effort.

Given my experiences at Cita last year in PDI, I think I present better in the flesh as it were. So when I'm ready, I'll start going to socials and the club nights that don't make it too difficult for single guys.

In the meantime I'm happy meeting guys which way easier.

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By *emboy AlexMan
14 weeks ago

Chadderton, Manchester

Not alot really, I just kinda message women and about 30% of the ones I do message either give a polite rejection or we end up hanging out.

Fab is easy for me.

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By *ir tootMan
14 weeks ago

Burton-on-Trent

"Not alot really, I just kinda message women and about 30% of the ones I do message either give a polite rejection or we end up hanging out.

Fab is easy for me. "

Honeslty taking fab not so seriously has done wonders for me.

And I've met some awsome people.

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By *emboy AlexMan
14 weeks ago

Chadderton, Manchester

"Not alot really, I just kinda message women and about 30% of the ones I do message either give a polite rejection or we end up hanging out.

Fab is easy for me.

Honeslty taking fab not so seriously has done wonders for me.

And I've met some awsome people.

Exactly! I just come on here to talk about nerd shit or browse forums and since then the site has been good to me.

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By *ir tootMan
14 weeks ago

Burton-on-Trent

"Not alot really, I just kinda message women and about 30% of the ones I do message either give a polite rejection or we end up hanging out.

Fab is easy for me.

Honeslty taking fab not so seriously has done wonders for me.

And I've met some awsome people.

Exactly! I just come on here to talk about nerd shit or browse forums and since then the site has been good to me. "

The fab curse is really though.😭

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By *ilverfox for youMan
14 weeks ago

Hull

The older I am the more invisible I become !! I do keep trying though but get nowhere .clubs aren’t for everyone .hence this site ! Still I put it down to my age .but magnetic not as it seems to be happening to all of us !

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By *eroLondonMan
14 weeks ago

Mayfair

It's a two-pronged answer from me: I put a significant amount of effort into arranging meets and also very little in most respects.

Most of my meets have been on the back of women sending the first message. Granted, not all messages lead to meets (men are allowed to be discerning too!), but when there is some mutual interest and attraction I put a lot of time and effort in getting to know that person. Most of meets are arranged months in advance (blame that, amongst other things, on The Fab Curse™).

I don't do clubs. I don't use dating apps.

I very much enjoy attending socials but that's usually to make friends, increase my exposure and maintain my nexus of forum-dwellers. I don't use them to pick up women - although I should because this seems to be the modus operandi on some of the more recent socials. (Clearly I didn't get the memo!)

The only "parties" I attend these days tend to have lashings of ginger beer, sherbet, cakes and ice cream.

Plan B...and Plan C....I've been there. I refuse to be anyone's Plan 'x'.

OP, I didn't interpret this as a ‘feel sorry’ for you thread. I think your post makes perfect sense and it's a good 'ask'. The trouble is that it's a numbers game and women, in particular, are inundated with the good, the bad and the ugly in their ever-increasing inboxes.

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By *ir tootMan
14 weeks ago

Burton-on-Trent

"It's a two-pronged answer from me: I put a significant amount of effort into arranging meets and also very little in most respects.

I don't do clubs. I don't use dating apps.

The only "parties" I attend these days tend to have lashings of ginger beer, sherbet, cakes and ice cream.

Plan B...and Plan C....I've been there. I refuse to be anyone's Plan 'x'.

I do hope I can eventually meet you sir, hopefully next year will be a bright one.

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By *ellhungvweMan
14 weeks ago

Cheltenham

I am kind of the same as Nero. If I try to get meets they tend not to happen. If I stop forcing things and just focus on being myself then it gets easier.

Fab is going to do what fab is going to do and you just have to try and ride the wave when it is going in your direction.

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By *hilloutMan
14 weeks ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

I never had difficulty getting meets from fab, most of which involved the sex.

Did it require effort? Yes, absolutely. Every single one came about from my initiative. Not once did I meet someone as a result of being spontaneously messaged first. I also met people at socials and clubs, again, the result putting effort in through messaging, investing in the profile and having an appealing online presence.

As I'm retired again, this is no longer a concern 😁😂

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By *enk15Man
14 weeks ago

Evesham

I’ve retired from messaging first.

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By *ommy trucker1Man
14 weeks ago

south wales

I'm a keen dogger vouyer so to speak and have met a good few cpls and single fems from fab. So my efforts in trying to arrange meets is minimal as I know that for every cpl or single meet status goes up there's at least 100 other men trying to get it first ? I've had a few good meets from twitter /x also telegram too.

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By (user no longer on site)
14 weeks ago

This site now comes second now , im on other dating apps which I find work much better ,just yesterday I had a meet from match.com , and we both want nsa ,so meeting Thursday,

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By *iss_Juicy79Woman
14 weeks ago

Edinburgh

At least you guys make an effort there's so many that don't.

Profiles are so boring little to no descriptions and no pics or dick pics only

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By (user no longer on site)
14 weeks ago

I'm not male, honest.

But I don't bother trying to meet anyone anymore off here, since when did sex become so bloody hard!?

You have to be enthusiastic, but not too enthusiastic. You have to be sexually confident but not too confident. You have to be this or that or whatever the fuck he wants. Just no. No. No. No.

I'm not competitive and I refuse to compete for any guy which is how it always seems on here.

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By *ealitybitesMan
14 weeks ago

Belfast

Zero effort. I haven't sent a single introductory message in almost 5 years and haven't met anyone new in almost as long.

I'm not a big fan of the social scene and we don't have clubs here that you can just rock up to. They are invitation only.

I'm not actively looking to meet here or anywhere else and it wouldn't bother me if I never had another new meet.

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By *ymClassDropout OP Man
14 weeks ago

Berkshire

"I'm not male, honest.

You have more balls than some of the dues on here so you get a pass.

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By (user no longer on site)
14 weeks ago

I put quite a lot of effort in. Being 63, you have to! I try and take part in the forums and I do get a reasonable amount of replies to my polite introductory messages. Meet wise it’s slim pickings, but I’m optimistic

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By *r MzchiefMan
14 weeks ago

Derbyshire

Ive been here before, this time round ive been no more successful. A couple of meets and made a special friend along the way but I do find the negativity and abject apathy towards men in general leaves me quite dispondent. I dont approach with the thoughts of a sexual encounter, from experience i know that is a long way down the line if a conversation can be struck up. Despite this i have just signed up for another year, ever the optimist, in the pursuit of finding a partner in crime to chase a little fun with. As a single male clubs and parties i find entertaining but just as fruitless. I sometimes wonder why im doing this but have no clue so ill keep on going at least for another year.

Happy Fabbing guys.

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By *LiamMan
14 weeks ago

Midlands

Zero effort

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By *oomerangboyMan
14 weeks ago

Staffordshire

Some days I’ll make an effort, but overall fabs can be exasperating, I’ve been on and off here for a long time, so I know the score, best thing is never expect anything, even a conversation ! Take it all with a pinch of salt I say, then you can’t be disappointed….

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By *acey_RedWoman
14 weeks ago

Liverpool

For what it's worth (totally fair if that's little to nothing), I think you're approaching things the right way. Fab can be great for staying in touch with friends from clubs and socials but for actually finding people to meet, less so. In terms of searching locally, it's next to useless simply due to the sheer number of mostly blank profiles on here. I've occasionally developed a connection through the forum or just chanced upon a profile within a reasonable distance with someone compatible but it's mostly a chance thing rather than any sort of usability of the site. Fortunately I enjoy the club scene and generally can find what I'm looking for there.

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By *oomarangMan
14 weeks ago

Chester

"These days none

I got the message that I'm unmeetable many years ago "

This goes for me as well

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By *cotlad178Man
14 weeks ago

falkirk

I'm putting 1000% in to better my messages and profile, feel I'm being held back by not having a veri by meet yet, and at the moment the clubs that are close by only have stuff on when I'm not free.

Gave up with dating apps as was getting nowhere atleast here I'm getting views but no ones msging me first yet due to no veri's, just getting that sense.

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By *cottish guy 555Man
14 weeks ago

London

Not a lot.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
14 weeks ago

Leeds

"I'm putting 1000% in to better my messages and profile, feel I'm being held back by not having a veri by meet yet, and at the moment the clubs that are close by only have stuff on when I'm not free.

Gave up with dating apps as was getting nowhere atleast here I'm getting views but no ones msging me first yet due to no veri's, just getting that sense."

The verification isn't a magical inbox booster, it's easy to get one, pop on cam, pop to a club, pop to a local social and ask.

Mrs

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By *lder budweiserMan
14 weeks ago

Stirlingshire

None now, sent literally dozens of first messages after reading through profiles and messaging accordingly with face pics etc and never had a single reply

No green tick means no invites to socials or clubs either

The dating sites aren't great but effort pays off there... slightly

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By *agic.MMan
14 weeks ago

Orpington

The only effort I put is in my profile...specifically my content. I guess you could say there is a slight effort I put in my appearance (although working out and grooming is just a part of my lifestyle and comes like second nature). Other than that zero effort...I don't message anyone and haven't done that in years, and the only women I want to meet are the women that want to meet me, so on fab I have more of a reactive (rather than active) approach. I don't go to clubs other than to socialise and will not have sex with anyone I meet in a club (strange I know). The way I do it works for me, and that's all that matters. I know men that spend hours creating messages sending them to various women on here, only to be rejected over and over...and all I can think is if they would put the same amount of energy in themselves as they do in messaging they would accomplish so much more (and not just on fab).

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By *egDaySkipperMan
14 weeks ago

Liverpool

I try to reply to statuses, usually that's the best way for me to get chatting and long time ago it used to be forums

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By (user no longer on site)
14 weeks ago

Just respond to the occasional wink. It ain’t much but it’s honest work.

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By (user no longer on site)
14 weeks ago

I might send the odd message, but tend not to get a reply. Occasionally I'll go to a club, that does get me chatting to others but usually no further.

I don't expect a great deal off fab, so I really don't make an effort. No complaints from me, "you only get out, what you put in"

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By *ffervescentMan
14 weeks ago

winfrith

I don't make any effort I'm not young I'm not especially attractive, I'm not as fit as I was when younger but I do ok because I'm normal I guess and polite for many they find this attractive. The guys who just think sex all the time struggle here.

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By *enSiskoMan
14 weeks ago

Cestus 3

As one can see from my profile zero.

As usual I open my door, go out and meet the opposite sex, sometime I am successful, other times I have made a friend.

I did not have to run the gauntlet, jump through hoops, white knight, prepare photos for my profile nothing zero just go out and have a conversation.

I wonder how many women I have met on a night out, that have a profile on FAB.

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By *ornucopiaMan
14 weeks ago

Bexley

"I might send the odd message, but tend not to get a reply. Occasionally I'll go to a club, that does get me chatting to others but usually no further.

I don't expect a great deal off fab, so I really don't make an effort. No complaints from me, "you only get out, what you put in"

..Cock?

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By *neoff2024Man
14 weeks ago

Sharoe Green

Absolutely zero effort now. I've had far better profiles and saw no increase in productivity, mostly don't even get my profile looked at let alone response to a well thought out message.

I often wish I was willing to fuck some of the here and now brigade, or the absolute mingers who think they're something because they get 50 messages a day. But I'm not. I try to find the nicer people who deserve a little more, sadly they rarely read a message, Absolutely never reply if they accidentally read it.

I dont mind rejection on the basis we're not compatible, nor because they don't fancy me, but rejection based on invisibility is difficult.

I'm never going to be a site supporter again, unless it becomes a pay only site. I'm convinced it's the only way to save this site

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By *abinman2Man
14 weeks ago

Llandegla

I know the feing pal

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By *2000ManMan
14 weeks ago

Worthing

Not as much as I used to. I use fab as social club to share ideas, thoughts, humour. Anything else is a bonus.

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By *abbergastedMan
14 weeks ago

Glasgow

I’ve kinda decided to leave it to fate.

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By *zeroMan
14 weeks ago

Glasgow

Messaging first on fab? Absolutely zilch.

I prefer talking to people face to face in clubs or at socials then messaging if we hit it off.

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By *.T.Man
14 weeks ago

Near the airport

Defining effort is probably the trickiest part. Will I go the extra mile for someone who has shown an interest? for sure!

Do I do all the chasing? Not when it isn't reciprocated. It takes two to tango.

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By *irldnCouple
14 weeks ago

Brighton

Bot a single guy obviously do hope you don’t mind us jumping into the thread?

Reading some of the posts, it always surprises us that some single guys (or women) use this site as a sort of no strings dating site. There are surely better places to get some 1-on-1 action?

Not saying you shouldn’t use this site however you see fit, but is it really the right target audience for all your effort? For us this is a swinger website which is different to simple NSA sex? Maybe that is just us?

I (mr) used to swing as a single guy before getting together with Mrs. I kept my swinging activity separate from my dating activity. I saw them as very different.

Again, might just be my interpretation (which is no more valid than anyone else’s) but swinging is about kink, threesomes and moresomes, specific 1-on-1 scenarios where a third party may still be involved but not present (hotwife and/or cuckold) etc. If it were me, and I was single now, I would use dating apps for casual sex and possible girlfriends (and real life too like work or bars etc) and places like Fab to try and satisfy the kinkier side.

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By *dz69247Man
14 weeks ago

Manchester

"Reading some of the posts, it always surprises us that some single guys (or women) use this site as a sort of no strings dating site. There are surely better places to get some 1-on-1 action?

This is a good quote. Fab is absolutely awful if you are after some regular vanilla sex. I could go on Tinder, Bumble etc, and after a little graft could have a met by the evening, hell I’ve had some within the hour.

Fab is absolutely shite for that, and never understand why people would think this would be the best option.

Fabs strengths however is finding more of a kink or something different. I love gangbangs, orgies, moresomes and the likes, I’m not going to find that on a dating site but fab is perfect for that.

I always say it, but to get success on fab, you have to be in the right place, at the right time. I don’t think I’ve had any success in trying to arrange a meeting in advance, but had plenty, where someone has posted “meet now”, “looking for a meet this evening” type of status.

My best advice, is use your hotlist. Search though profiles that are nearby, post often, have regular meets, and also match what you are looking for, and hotlist them. Build up your hotlist of reliable people, and hopefully one day your stars will align, and you will see a post, that you can attend or host.

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By *neoff2024Man
14 weeks ago

Sharoe Green

There's a lot of sense in the above post and I 'try' to stick to that.

I'm here for bi threesomes. I try to message only couples who are looking for that, yet still don't even get a look at 🤣

Honestly, the ignorance on here is ridiculous. I get why, but it takes literally 2 seconds to look on a profile and see if someone might be of interest, 5 or 6 seconds to block them if definitely not of interest

Most of those who whinge about being overwhelmed are either new, or encourage it. Any female who has been around for a while should be au fait with blocking, and setting filters, to a point where their inbox is manageable

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By *dz69247Man
14 weeks ago

Manchester

"There's a lot of sense in the above post and I 'try' to stick to that.

I'm here for bi threesomes. I try to message only couples who are looking for that, yet still don't even get a look at 🤣

Unfortunately you are a faceless profile, in a sea of faceless profiles, also you cannot accommodate, so look like you are maybe attached.

Couples and ladies on here, will easy get 20+ messages a time, harsh as it sounds, you don’t offer anything that a 1,000 other profiles will offer, and thus likely to be ignored/ blocked etc.

Don’t be disheartened though, it’s definitely not personal, and just part of the journey on fab. Honestly, being at the right place, at the right time is how you will find success. I’ve had a couple of bi meetings from fab, and enjoyed them very much, and that’s with me being very picky (it’s rare I’ll have a bi meeting).

All the best, keep at it and no doubt you will find success.

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By *neoff2024Man
14 weeks ago

Sharoe Green

Cheers. I do get it, understand it though.

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By *lamdaddyMan
14 weeks ago

London

You're doing the right thing. Dating apps and clubs are the way to go.

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By *urreyphotographerMan
14 weeks ago

kt16

Think your profile looks great.

I've actually met quite a few couples, chat to a few and met a few single ladies on here which to be honest is a little surprising as I have zero success on dating apps.

There's a lot of guys on here, and the feedback I get from people is that most guys don't stand a chance because they have just a few cock photos, profile isn't interesting they can't seem to write a proper message, messages seem to be copy and pasted, lack interest and imagination etc.

Couples and single ladies do get bombarded with messages, and it can be a bit of a lottery if they decide to pick your message and actually read it. I photographed a lady who then posted the photos on her profile and she messaged me back saying she had over 500 messages with in 48 hours. A lot of couples and ladies haven't got the time to read all their messages and bulk delete.

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By *HUSH-Man
14 weeks ago

London

I haven’t sent out a message for a long time on here.

I do still get some Fabs and winks and if I like the profile I’ll send them a message but rarely does it go anywhere.

I find I get more success elsewhere. The swipe kind. Not to sound like a conceited arsehole but I do coast on my appearance on those places. I just have more enthusiasm knowing there’s physical attraction from the get go.

I’ve had a meets. Social and the sex kind. Been to 2 club nights and although I’m pleased I went I don’t know if it’s my scene.

I enjoy the FAB forums. There’s a lot of really interesting, kind and cool people on here. I would make the effort to meet them in person, even if it’s platonic.

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By *ullsfan77Man
14 weeks ago

Torquay

My wife and I decided to start exploring early last year, however, she wanted to do it alone and not as a couple-she doesn’t feel comfortable about me being there when she meets guys. I would love to see her with another guy but must respect how she wants it. Unfortunately, this puts me into the “lone male who can’t accommodate “ category. This and being married will unfortunately put me to the bottom of the pile on each occasion. Whilst I am not ripped gym fit, I don’t believe that to be the main issue. I could lie but it is disrespectful.

I do send messages, which are thoughtfully constructed-a bit about myself and the type of lady and situation I am looking for. I also try to build it around the profile too-this demonstrates that I have actually read it! I don’t send messages if it is obvious that I am not what they are looking for. I have had some success on other sites-two meets in all. One was an FWB for a year but she has now returned to a committed relationship with her ex. The other was a one off.

My wife has 4 guys she sees regularly-they are all more than 20 years older than her as she likes older men. I am not desperate-I have a pretty full life , with a job, kids , going to football/ rugby matches, volunteering on a heritage railway, railway modelling and will be completing a masters degree next year, so I have plenty to keep me occupied! I just love the naughtiness of it all but I seek a regular FWB like I did have. Just met once in a great while and had a laugh too.

I don’t do vanilla sites as many of my work colleagues use them. On sites like this are fine as I could say “so what are you doing on here?”

So yes, I make the effort-haven’t ruled out clubs but I am not sure they would be the solution.

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By *afkaMan
14 weeks ago

Nottingham (ish)

Zero effort made currently, just lurking in the Forums living vicariously- too much real life stuff to deal with at the moment to faff with any of the actual sex stuff.

I'll get back into it in a while, update the profile and take a few new snapshots but it's always a pleasure, never a chore.

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By *hagTonightMan
14 weeks ago

From the land of haribos.

These days. I am not trying. I just use the forum, it is comedy gold

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By *neeyedwillieMan
14 weeks ago

Darlington

Not single and don't really try to get meets on fab now, just go to the club.

To.much effort for no reward on fab these days.

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By *uzzleMan
14 weeks ago

Hastings

Absolutely no effort whatsoever, its a waste of time but I do like the forums.

Profiles for single females in particular read like a person spefification and I can't be bothered. It's not uncommon for profiles to want a picture on first contact otherwise they will delete the message without reading it, no beards, no guys under 6 foot etc.

Plus I am fully aware of my place in society and where I fit within the pecking order. Once a face pic is requested, that is where my journey ends. Why would I want to continually put myself through getting rejected?

Craigslist was far easier before it closed. You'd respond to an add, they'd ask for a cock picture, then the meet was arranged. Far easier than this Fab lark!

Fab for me is an enterainment platform, not a realistic place to get a meet!

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By *agic johnsonMan
14 weeks ago

morden

I try and write a fresh new thoughtful polite message , and be pretty thorough and polite , but unfortunately the people here have been all put on pedestals by us men and honestly think hardly anyman is worthy

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By *ags73Man
14 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

Rewrote profile and I’m still thinking no

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By *han87Man
14 weeks ago

Birmingham

Difficult. All my messages get ignored or deleted. No one wants to reply back. im sure my profile don't seem dodgy, or does it?

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By *AYENCouple
14 weeks ago

Lincolnshire

"I tend to rely on parties and the occasional club visit for my meets. Also dating apps as they seem to work surprisingly well for me for NSA type meets.

I think I have a lot of offer. I look after myself physically. I am articulate. I look okay.

However I find trying to instigate a meet from here is just very difficult. I do all of the ‘correct’ things but harbouring any genuine interest seems to be difficult.

I have had one meet where I was the instigator. Even then I felt like I was the ‘plan B’ option.

So please don't interpret this as a ‘feel sorry’ for me thread as it’s genuinely not. Like I have said I do okay.

I am just curious how other single blokes find it on fab ?"

You may not be doing yourself any favours referring to what might be a stag/vixen dynamic as a cuckold dynamic - cuckolding has an element

of humiliation and they don't usually wholeheartedly join in. The slightest thing can put people off, maybe that's it. K.

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By *lanenakedMan
14 weeks ago

near you

Very little now, it took so much time and effort for such little replies it really wears you down on here, so I'm more content finding a lover / partner on other sites / platforms or fairly easily in the pub like it's always been because well you are both there in the flesh ! Hence a meet is where it's at but in here, such little chat never mind meeting someone. It's really just window shopping.

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By *oiluvfunMan
14 weeks ago

Penrith

I have 5 lady friends I see regularly, so many guys will say I’m lucky, but these are friends I’ve made over the years I’ve been in this scene, and don’t mean I’m not interested in meeting/making new friends

I still love using Fab, as it has been very good for me! I only message profiles I feel a genuine possibility of a connection with, and never try ‘too hard’ with my messages.

I like the forum for just general chitchatting, but my location means I am unlikely to ever make many connections through it. If you’re near a city I’m sure the forum works better for actual meets, otherwise; it’s comedy gold at times

I tried the club scene as a solo guy, but found it to be quite depressing, and soul destroying. I went to 8 clubs, to a total of 19 visits, and yes, had a couple of one-off plays, but otherwise, the clubs were just a waste of time, effort, and money. The maxim “everyone in clubs is always friendly” really is not true, unless you have a pussy…..

Overall; I do like this fun side of life Fab can bring, but the reality is; I meet more women, more easily, in Vanillaland.

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By *entleman JayMan
14 weeks ago

Wakefield

"I tend to rely on parties and the occasional club visit for my meets. Also dating apps as they seem to work surprisingly well for me for NSA type meets.

I think I have a lot of offer. I look after myself physically. I am articulate. I look okay.

However I find trying to instigate a meet from here is just very difficult. I do all of the ‘correct’ things but harbouring any genuine interest seems to be difficult.

I have had one meet where I was the instigator. Even then I felt like I was the ‘plan B’ option.

So please don't interpret this as a ‘feel sorry’ for me thread as it’s genuinely not. Like I have said I do okay.

I am just curious how other single blokes find it on fab ? totally agree I can go into town and pull a lot easier, I also love that first eye contact, why am I on here, because the naughtiness is so exciting and the social side is brilliant, I've gone to Quest often just to have a chat."

Wow. I’m coming to Doncaster. lol.

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By *entleman JayMan
14 weeks ago

Wakefield

I’m lucky in that people who I’ve met up with in the past, keep popping back up. That and the odd new single or couple.

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By *esthetic21Man
14 weeks ago

Birmingham/Bristol

Probably zero.

If a meet came along I'd meet but I'm definitely not going out of my to try and arrange a meet here I'm more for the forums and perving

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By *b03Man
14 weeks ago

Exeter

Trying to hard is not only off-putting, but bad for your psyche too. Obviously you should try and have a nice profile, and send well worded messages, but this isn't a dating site!

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By (user no longer on site)
14 weeks ago

Well worded message and face pictures and doesn't mind meeting for social first and local to me

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By (user no longer on site)
11 weeks ago

"Well worded message and face pictures and doesn't mind meeting for social first and local to me "
how I see it he will find me so not that bothered

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By *erfHerder74Man
11 weeks ago

Inverclyde

Rarely, I have to have people reach out to me a few messages then I start to show an interest to them, they usually moved on to the next man by then

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By *ohnjones3210Man
11 weeks ago

Chester

"I tend to rely on parties and the occasional club visit for my meets. Also dating apps as they seem to work surprisingly well for me for NSA type meets.

I think I have a lot of offer. I look after myself physically. I am articulate. I look okay.

However I find trying to instigate a meet from here is just very difficult. I do all of the ‘correct’ things but harbouring any genuine interest seems to be difficult.

I have had one meet where I was the instigator. Even then I felt like I was the ‘plan B’ option.

So please don't interpret this as a ‘feel sorry’ for me thread as it’s genuinely not. Like I have said I do okay.

I am just curious how other single blokes find it on fab ?"

Ewooooo! I do really well on here for a single guy and I've been back only 2-3 weeks.

Why have I done well? Because I don't act sexually and I do/say/act however I like regardless of what anyone thinks.

Even when I message women, I don't make it sexual and I couldn't care less if it leads to sex or not. Women appreciate that.

It's a swingers site too - women don't come here for sex (as such). They come here to chat, to be in an environment that dabbles with sexual issues, and they like to toy with the idea of acting like a dirty little slut.

If you're in her sights, the situation is right, and whatever, maybe on the odd occasion, if the dishes are done and if the phase of the moon is right, if Fifi has not shat all over his kennel, she might one day ask you to go round for a "coffee".

...In which case I'd firmly reply with a "no!". Or would I? I don't know! That's all part of the fun!

Anyway, for sex, it's easier to go to house parties, meet ladies and friendzone them all. They'll usually start chasing if you do that. Make them wait, etc...

This site is more of a long game. Socials, chatting, messing about, etc.. lol

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By * D 777Man
11 weeks ago

bathgate

gave up trying

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By (user no longer on site)
11 weeks ago

As much effort as the person/profile require 😉 but I definitely don’t scrimp on the message and if I get a response all is good but if not meh 😂😂

I do, however, delete my sent messages as soon as sent (advice I read on a forum once) so I can’t see if they’re read and ignored or deleted 😁 keeps me sane 😂😂😂

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By *lanenakedMan
10 weeks ago

near you

Messaging locally is a total waste of time, although I still say the odd hello and try stimulate conversation but it really is futile tbh.

You would be best to go to big organised socials or a club night. If that's not your thing then really it's not going to happen.

Personally I'd bet that you will have much more success on the regular dating apps looking for non vanilla NSA or other arrangements or relationships. You'll get lots more chat, engagement and a bigger choice of women of your 'type' or the ratio is just better to start with.

This site, really, as it says on the tin, is for swinging couples.

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By *ood manMan
10 weeks ago

wsllsall

I tried to be polite courteous well mannered follow the rules such as face photos and et cetera been an over four years mate no one not even socially that says an off a lot for me then

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By *ony MannMan
10 weeks ago

Lagos, Portugal/ Ilfracombe Devon/ Anoover

I just let it happen, I chat, stay friendly and see what happens

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By *lowupdollTV/TS
10 weeks ago

Herts/Beds/Lomdon

I no longer do clubs, and I don’t send first messages. So maybe I’m making things extra difficult for myself. But I do find it challenging even though gays are meant to find it really easy. I want to meet people I want to meet not just anyone. I’m not tranny enough for those who want their gay wrapped up like it could be woman from behind in low light, I’m not masc enough for gay guys looking for meets. Being 51 prob doesn’t help either.

But the forums are a laugh (mostly) and generally people are friendly on here. The rest I’m happy to mooch along at my own pace.

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By *oni-massage-guyMan
10 weeks ago

Fareham

A ridiculous amount which is why I generally only offer massage sessions. Have found it much better at chatting and actually meeting up with couples and single fems. Offering something different than just a dick lol definitely separates you from others. I love giving massage too...so win win

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By *exxyyDy11Man
10 weeks ago

North West

I don't bother anymore, I've met a few wonderful people on here and very thankful for that.

But majority of the messages I have sent get ignored or deleted and it is waste of my time and effort. So I spend most of the time using the forums and hope for the best. So best not to take fab too seriously.

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By *otsossieMan
10 weeks ago

Chesterfield

Zero

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By *he Silver FuxMan
10 weeks ago

Uttoxeter

Now and again but it’s rarely messages that are specifically aimed at sexual meets - they’re about forum topics, humorous observations, compliments on pictures, asking opinions on parties, hosts, clubs, holiday destinations etc. sometimes these connections and messages do result in sexual shenanigans. Most of my meets via Fab are from women and couples messaging me.

Even my messages to good friends get lost in the plethora of shit messaging from the single male hoard.

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By *arley QuimWoman
10 weeks ago

Somewhere

I send first messages fairly regularly. I don't think I've had a social that's worked out yet off the back of it though

Easier if someone messages me first, maybe 🤔

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By *lder budweiserMan
10 weeks ago

Stirlingshire

Parklife!

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By *lowercandyWoman
10 weeks ago

Lancashire

"When I was meeting, I found the more effort I put in, the more successful I were at finding potentially compatible women. A decent profile, good pictures and being positive/proactive on the forums made a huge difference on the amount of messages I would receive.

I also have age on my side which seems to help."

See this!

I have had messages from newer people and I swear they don't read, don't have photos and think Hi. is enough.

Tbf I'm feeling in a reasonable mood so I have given them some pointers but it's to do all these things.

But they literally want it to fall in their lap.

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By *eroLondonMan
10 weeks ago

Mayfair

"It's a two-pronged answer from me: I put a significant amount of effort into arranging meets and also very little in most respects.

I don't do clubs. I don't use dating apps.

The only "parties" I attend these days tend to have lashings of ginger beer, sherbet, cakes and ice cream.

Plan B...and Plan C....I've been there. I refuse to be anyone's Plan 'x'.

I do hope I can eventually meet you sir, hopefully next year will be a bright one."

•

Sorry, only just seen this. Absolutely, next year...🍸🍷🍺

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By *opinovMan
10 weeks ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

I don't put in as much effort as I used to. There came a point when it became clear it wasn't going to yield much result either way, regardless of how much or little effort was put into composing messages to introduce myself... so I stopped. Instead, I wrote everything I wanted to say in my profile and let people contact me if they liked it - which, unfortunately, they don't seem to... but hey, at least I don't have to watch my messages being deleted unread too often any more.

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By (user no longer on site)
10 weeks ago

Zero effort as women you wouldn’t even look at in the street have a sense of entitlement on here so it’s a waste of time! Not going to put any effort into chatting to a 3/10 at best

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By *mileyculturebelfastMan
10 weeks ago

belfast

Very little to be honest.

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By *mileyculturebelfastMan
10 weeks ago

belfast

"Zero effort as women you wouldn’t even look at in the street have a sense of entitlement on here so it’s a waste of time! Not going to put any effort into chatting to a 3/10 at best

Bitter much.

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By (user no longer on site)
10 weeks ago

Not at all as in the real world, I have zero issues

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By (user no longer on site)
10 weeks ago

None anymore. I'm not what women are looking for which is why my block list is so long. Women don't send first messages to me so I assume that they are not interested. I just go to clubs and meet people socially now

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By *ustAnotherMan
10 weeks ago

Mids

I message when someone piques my interest. I read the profile, if I'm explicitly something they're not looking for I don't. Sometimes I wink.

Don't expect a response and don't get narky if I don't get one, can feel a bit disheartening occasionally, but I have picked up some regular chats from the forum and chatrooms. I'd like to think we might meet one day, if we do, great

put the time in, but doesn't entitle anyone to anything.

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By *abtastic Mr FoxMan
10 weeks ago

A den in the Glen

Now. Zero. Before a little over zero.

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By *ir SupremacyMan
10 weeks ago

Bolton

I do my best...but the odds are not in my favour Covid kind of distance me from all my friends with lockdown but that's the way it goes.

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By *ndrew CareyMan
10 weeks ago

Peterborough, Cambridgeshire & Lincolnshire

"I tend to rely on parties and the occasional club visit for my meets. Also dating apps as they seem to work surprisingly well for me for NSA type meets.

I think I have a lot of offer. I look after myself physically. I am articulate. I look okay.

However I find trying to instigate a meet from here is just very difficult. I do all of the ‘correct’ things but harbouring any genuine interest seems to be difficult.

I have had one meet where I was the instigator. Even then I felt like I was the ‘plan B’ option.

So please don't interpret this as a ‘feel sorry’ for me thread as it’s genuinely not. Like I have said I do okay.

I am just curious how other single blokes find it on fab ?"

There are peaks and troughs. Sometimes you get some interest and responses which may lead to something.

Other times, there are no responses and whilst no one owes anyone a response, a thanks but no thanks is better than silence. Especially when you send a photo.

I do meet people on dating apps and when I'm out and about, so that gives me some hope that I'm not hideous

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By (user no longer on site)
10 weeks ago

I find it fine.I think a problem for a lot of single guys is it becomes a numbers game so you end up with women replying that you actually have no interest in having some fun with

This tends to demoralise leading to you leaking power and that begins to show through the screen.

You must have maximum power and I can teach you the way

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By *ustAnotherMan
10 weeks ago

Mids

For only a small donation?

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By *ustincider888Man
10 weeks ago

Preston Ish

I don't put any effort in anymore.

I just be myself like I am in every day life.

If folk aren't interested, I'll lose no sleep.

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By *orthern BeardMan
10 weeks ago

Preston

I’ve generally found that the more effort I put in the more meets I have. The fact I’m now well verified helps. Sometimes it’s just luck, right time and place

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By *ealitybitesMan
10 weeks ago

Belfast

"I find it fine.I think a problem for a lot of single guys is it becomes a numbers game so you end up with women replying that you actually have no interest in having some fun with

This tends to demoralise leading to you leaking power and that begins to show through the screen.

You must have maximum power and I can teach you the way"

Assuming this isn't a wind up and you aren't a Mandalorian you might need to put a little more meat on the bones of this theory.

If it's only women they aren't interested in that are replying, why are they contacting them in the first place?

It has nothing to do with power and much more to do with self respect.

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By *ElectricityMan
10 weeks ago

Preston

Gave up some time ago

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By *opman121Man
10 weeks ago

stoke on trent

There is a lot of competition out there , just have be patient and see if u catch a fish with your rod out lol

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By *exxyyDy11Man
10 weeks ago

North West

"I’ve generally found that the more effort I put in the more meets I have. The fact I’m now well verified helps. Sometimes it’s just luck, right time and place "

Yeah I've noticed my veris have helped me also. Shows I'm genuine

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By *ittlemissFlirtyCouple
10 weeks ago

Southampton

"I don't bother anymore, I've met a few wonderful people on here and very thankful for that.

Haha you could try replying to your messages 🤣🤣

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By *os19Man
10 weeks ago

Edmonton

Occasionally I send out polite messages with a view to have a social or a meet but seldom get a reply.I guess been 56 years old puts me out of a lot of ladies and couples age range filters which is fair enough. I find do better when I go to club or spa.

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By *end1Man
10 weeks ago

southend on sea

Zero effect I'm a lazy git😂

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By *WB85Man
10 weeks ago

Staffordshire

I find it better for my ego right now, not to send any messages.

The harder search the less you seem to find.

I'm a kind hearted male that actually cares about people.....frequently told I'm too nice for this lifestyle.

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By *ony MannMan
10 weeks ago

Lagos, Portugal/ Ilfracombe Devon/ Anoover

I'm nice, I've been told. That is what attracted one woman, or so she said.

Nice is not a bad thing.

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By *hiversMan
10 weeks ago

Dinas Powys

I'm not really on here consistently at the moment, but when I was/am again, then socials are high on the agenda for me.

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By *leanandkeenMan
10 weeks ago

jarrow

If the lady or couple have a good profile and I feel I would be a good match then I’ll send them a specific message to them that relates to the them perhaps add a bit humour to the message

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