FabSwingers.com forum: What's the worst first message you've had

By *riendwithbenefits OP Man
36 weeks ago

Warwick

Mine was. "Hey, come to so and so address right now and stick your meat through the letterbox and leave"

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By *olfandtazCouple
36 weeks ago

Bristol

WUU2, fancy a fuck

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By *riendwithbenefits OP Man
36 weeks ago

Warwick

Lots of imagination there

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By *lderflower_AppleWoman
36 weeks ago

Donut City

It was something along the lines of would I be interested in hosting him and his dad for a threesome at my gaff...

🤢

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By *riendwithbenefits OP Man
36 weeks ago

Warwick

Omg that's gross. Why didn't he just invite his mum for the lols

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By *heGigglersCouple
36 weeks ago

near Birmingham

Wuu2

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By *issLickalottapusWoman
36 weeks ago

La La Land

"WUU2, fancy a fuck"

Noted

I won't send you another message of that nature

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By *mooth shaftMan
36 weeks ago

Edinburgh

Had one msg today that said ...'hey do you know where I can buy any green?'

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By *herrybakewellCouple
36 weeks ago

Staffordshire

The usual bullshit of other men thinking they can show my wife a better time than me.

One guy said I'd probably end up crying if I watched as I'd never be able to satisfy her like he can.

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By *mmaleiaWoman
36 weeks ago

Trowbridge

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
36 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

I'm going to call you Harley. You can call me J

🤢

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

1 guy said he wanted me on all 4s so he could lick my arse holewhile wanking my big stiff cock

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By *llxWoman
36 weeks ago

Near by

“The first word that pops into my head is slag”

lol not on the first message, cmooonnn. Blocked!

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

Just that.

Mrs

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By *riendwithbenefits OP Man
36 weeks ago

Warwick

Haha save that one for the spanking right lol

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By *eordieJeansCouple
36 weeks ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

“Do you even lift”

It broke my heart 😢

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By *riendwithbenefits OP Man
36 weeks ago

Warwick

Must had ejaculated before finishing

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

A tv asked me to shit on his chest

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

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By *riendwithbenefits OP Man
36 weeks ago

Warwick

One thing I've never understood

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

"A tv asked me to shit on his chest "

Did you do it lol

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By *agatoXXXMan
36 weeks ago

742 Evergreen Terrace

I honestly don't remeber bad ones. Just block, delete, move on.

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

"A tv asked me to shit on his chest

Did you do it lol"

Haha no

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

I don't get first messages

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By *weetsmellingtreatsWoman
36 weeks ago

Gloucester

I want to smash your cunt in you fat slag

Blocked

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

Yeah I hate the ‘you’ll be begging for more’ if I had to guess they’ll turn up at the door shaking like a leaf

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

"A tv asked me to shit on his chest

Did you do it lol

Haha no "

Sorry, i was just joking there.

Seriously my worst message ever was just a dot.

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

"A tv asked me to shit on his chest

Did you do it lol

Haha no

Sorry, i was just joking there.

Seriously my worst message ever was just a dot.

I knew was joking no need to apologise no offence taken haha

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

"Hey, we have kids in the same class"

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By *riendwithbenefits OP Man
36 weeks ago

Warwick

Or probably not turn up. I reckon half the people on here are the ones

Who used to call the numbers in the back of the news of the world for thrills.

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By *aomilatteCouple
36 weeks ago

Midlands

Someone offered to be used as a toilet

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By *issmorganWoman
36 weeks ago

Calderdale innit

One asking if I'd role play his sister and another from a bloke telling me he used to wank going through his mother's underwear drawer

both blocked.

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By *r Mind CandyMan
36 weeks ago

Cheshire

"Someone offered to be used as a toilet

Did you get all flushed?

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

“How do you mangage to fuck anybody, fat fucker.”

I invited his girlfriend around for a demonstration, so I could show him how it’s done properly.

He wasn’t impressed with my response

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By *eordieJeansCouple
36 weeks ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

"“How do you mangage to fuck anybody, fat fucker.”

I invited his girlfriend around for a demonstration, so I could show him how it’s done properly.

He wasn’t impressed with my response

I bet she was though

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By *endalshaggersCouple
36 weeks ago

Lake District

"The usual bullshit of other men thinking they can show my wife a better time than me.

One guy said I'd probably end up crying if I watched as I'd never be able to satisfy her like he can.

We gt this a lot. Blocked single guys from massaging but have noticed even the guys in a couple giving it the talk about their massive cock, how they're in perfect shape, my husband isn't, has a small dick, come sit on theirs etc etc.

C xoxo

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By *ife NinjaMan
36 weeks ago

Dunfermline

"The usual bullshit of other men thinking they can show my wife a better time than me.

One guy said I'd probably end up crying if I watched as I'd never be able to satisfy her like he can.

C xoxo"

Isn't it supposed to be mutual fun rather than a pissing contest?

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

"You ever get to Eatonton GA much?'

...Nah...

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By *ortney FoxxxWoman
36 weeks ago

Cardiff

"Mine was. "Hey, come to so and so address right now and stick your meat through the letterbox and leave""
😂 classy

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By *airyboxMan
36 weeks ago

sheffield

"One asking if I'd role play his sister and another from a bloke telling me he used to wank going through his mother's underwear drawer

both blocked. "

That’s just really creepy… no wonder you vomited

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By *ony MannMan
36 weeks ago

South Newton

"Mine was. "Hey, come to so and so address right now and stick your meat through the letterbox and leave""

Have you seen that stone, you put your hand in and if you lie the stone bites your hand off.....or they could have forgotten to feed the dog

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By *riendwithbenefits OP Man
36 weeks ago

Warwick

Haha either way I wasn't trying.

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By *exySiren01Woman
36 weeks ago

RCT

You are too fat to fck!!!

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By *MCMan
36 weeks ago

London/EA

From a couple who repeated said do not just message us hi on their profile and demanded you make effort.

Their status also was moaning about people sending poor openers at the time 😅

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By *lue-raspWoman
36 weeks ago

never ending banter in fife

Things like..

Im gonna fuck ur mouth

Will you peg me

Whats ur address me n my pal are gonna cum fuck n fill u

Then when u say no u get

U slut u whore u fat fucking bitch, who would wanna fuck a cunt like u etc etc

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By *exxyyDy11Man
36 weeks ago

North West

Saying hi when I'm making a fucming effort with the messages or emojis as a response

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By *olinOfBathMan
36 weeks ago

Corsham

"Things like..

Im gonna fuck ur mouth

Will you peg me

Whats ur address me n my pal are gonna cum fuck n fill u

Then when u say no u get

U slut u whore u fat fucking bitch, who would wanna fuck a cunt like u etc etc "

When you say "No"...? Surely, you don't turn down such wonderful offers?

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By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan
36 weeks ago

Gloucestershire

FAF

I mean come on, I’m not a piece of meat you know, let’s chat and drink tea for a while first

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

"“How do you mangage to fuck anybody, fat fucker.”

I invited his girlfriend around for a demonstration, so I could show him how it’s done properly.

He wasn’t impressed with my response

I bet she was though

Naturally.

I was a goddamned sexual tyrannosaurus that night.

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

“Skank”

He then immediately blocked me. 🤣

Or the absolute copy & paste fail where he’d left the profile names of his previous messagees in it… I couldn’t stop laughing

Or my actual favourite. Many pictures of a very scary looking fella, in the background were loads & loads of ceramic clowns. You know when you just foresee yourself ending up in black bin bags….

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By *riendwithbenefits OP Man
36 weeks ago

Warwick

Noted, bin the clowns lol

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
36 weeks ago

Central

"“Skank”

He then immediately blocked me. 🤣

Or the absolute copy & paste fail where he’d left the profile names of his previous messagees in it… I couldn’t stop laughing

Or my actual favourite. Many pictures of a very scary looking fella, in the background were loads & loads of ceramic clowns. You know when you just foresee yourself ending up in black bin bags…."

It's when they tell you they've got the bags ready and have worked out where you are, that it gets more uncomfortable. Blocks here are wonderful

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

Any message is better than none for a male on here

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

"FAF

I mean come on, I’m not a piece of meat you know, let’s chat and drink tea for a while first

Coffee please 🤣😘

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By *ord500Man
36 weeks ago

Glasgow

Must be mine am totally hopeless unless am face to face with potential playmate,need to see to hem Inthe flesh, really hopeless x

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By *exyScientistsCouple
36 weeks ago

Castlebar

Are you on the pill

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By *oiluvfunMan
36 weeks ago

Birmingham

"Wank/suck fun?"

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By *ggdrasil66Man
36 weeks ago

Saltdean

Yeah, but not that fuckin rough!

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By *radleywigginsMan
36 weeks ago

northwest

The one from my dad was pretty cringey

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By *ames 13Man
36 weeks ago

Cronton

Just had this convo with a couple...

Them: "You on snap"

Me: "Yup"

Them: "what's your username?"

Me: "Why?"

Them: "To share on there. But don't worry, we are looking for someone polite"

Then blocked me; literally 2 minutes ago

Like wtf. Why would I give my snap immediately to a random profile?? I am clearly so impolite

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By *pinningfasterWoman
36 weeks ago

Birmingham

"Phone sex now"

No thanks

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

Too many too count but

Todays

What's your address and what's your post code

Empty profiles too.

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By *n at the DeeP endCouple
36 weeks ago

Manchester

"You look like u suk dik good"

The only frustrating thing about it was the spelling

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By *ames 13Man
36 weeks ago

Cronton

Not Fab, but the apps...

The amount of girls who open with, "...How much do you earn?"... is crazy

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By *ir tootMan
36 weeks ago

Raccoon city

How do you shit?

Was my first

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By *haiababeWoman
36 weeks ago

North devon

Hi, I'm currently balls deep in my wofe but looking at pictures of you

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

‘Asda car park now. Bring condoms as Steve’s infection has nearly cleared.’

I’d never met anyone in Asda (Dover) let alone ‘Steve’. I guess it didn’t bother them that I’m straight, as well!

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By *loriouscurvesWoman
36 weeks ago

wild west lothian

Would you take a dump on me?

No!

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By *YDB75Man
36 weeks ago

Beverley

Got one today “ Will ya let me sniff ya wifes dirty knickers “

Not even a please or anything

To be fair if he wants to sniff them then he’s a braver man than me

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

[Removed by poster at 09/10/24 23:12:22]

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By *siancouplehantsCouple
36 weeks ago

K-PAX

"I would destroy you"

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