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"I try to be the best version of myself for me. Not necessarily for other people 💜" This ⬆️ | |||
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"Do you and try and be the best you you could possibly be? People tend to look up to and idolise someone they see as a barometer of the good and great, but no one is perfect. And that's fine, it's human. I'm not talking about myself (obviously as I'm a twat), but just a bastion of good in a fucked up world. No, I'm not religious, and yes - I really am a twat, but do you have an internal barometer or expectation? " I'm a work-in-progress, always at least trying to better myself one way or another. Not always succeeding, evidently, but I do try. | |||
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"I try to be the best version of myself for me. Not necessarily for other people 💜" Yeah, I guess authenticity is the best someone can get. No one looking up to you for guidance? | |||
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"I try to be the best version of myself for me. Not necessarily for other people 💜 This ⬆️" No kids? | |||
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"I try to be the best version of myself for me. Not necessarily for other people 💜 Yeah, I guess authenticity is the best someone can get. No one looking up to you for guidance?" I like to help the people around me. I've heard friends say they want to be more like me before. But they need to find their own best them, not just an imitation of someone they respect. | |||
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"Do you and try and be the best you you could possibly be? People tend to look up to and idolise someone they see as a barometer of the good and great, but no one is perfect. And that's fine, it's human. I'm not talking about myself (obviously as I'm a twat), but just a bastion of good in a fucked up world. No, I'm not religious, and yes - I really am a twat, but do you have an internal barometer or expectation? I'm a work-in-progress, always at least trying to better myself one way or another. Not always succeeding, evidently, but I do try." Yeah man, it never really ends. | |||
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"I try to be the best version of myself for me. Not necessarily for other people 💜 Yeah, I guess authenticity is the best someone can get. No one looking up to you for guidance? I like to help the people around me. I've heard friends say they want to be more like me before. But they need to find their own best them, not just an imitation of someone they respect." So you can't read a book and learn anything from it because you didn't write it? | |||
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"No. I don’t really try. I just am. Hard to explain. I am me and I think I’m a good person without a need for actually trying. " It's not about trying, though. Good for you.  | |||
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"I've sort of stopped trying to be constantly "better" in recent years, as I had unrealistic expectations of myself and would repeatedly burn out and get very ill. Instead I've accepted my limitations and work within what's reasonably achievable, and I'm much happier for it. As a result, I've got more energy to give to others. It's a bit of a contradiction, really." Hah! That's actually very realistic to me. There's definitely a happy medium. | |||
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"I try to be the best version of myself for me. Not necessarily for other people 💜 Yeah, I guess authenticity is the best someone can get. No one looking up to you for guidance? I like to help the people around me. I've heard friends say they want to be more like me before. But they need to find their own best them, not just an imitation of someone they respect. So you can't read a book and learn anything from it because you didn't write it?" I can't become Harry Potter. Even if I really enjoyed the book. (Fucking terrible example, but I don't know where the literary level is here and that's a well known one.) | |||
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"No. I don’t really try. I just am. Hard to explain. I am me and I think I’m a good person without a need for actually trying. It's not about trying, though. Good for you. "Maybe I read it wrong. I thought it said do you try to be the best person. I’ll double check | |||
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"I don’t want to be someone who would look down on who I am now. But I do want to be someone who would encourage the person I was to try harder. " You have no idea how much I like your posts. | |||
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"Absolutely not. I just do me and don’t worry about other people or what they think of me. That’s not to say I’m not nice, I just don’t make a conscious effort to be more nice. I’m me and people get what they get. Luckily I’m fucking fantastic in every way." This is kinda what I meant. Apart from the last bit | |||
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"My personality stops me from ever being the best version of me." Yeahhh... you aren't the only one (me too). It's really do think it's fine. At least you're conscious of that. | |||
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"Yes, I try to be best person I can be, both in professional and personal terms. Both for personal satisfaction and as a role model to my children. Striving to be better is a work in progress, often with setbacks, but a noble goal to aspire to. " Good man. I respect that. | |||
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"Absolutely not. I just do me and don’t worry about other people or what they think of me. That’s not to say I’m not nice, I just don’t make a conscious effort to be more nice. I’m me and people get what they get. Luckily I’m fucking fantastic in every way. This is kinda what I meant. Apart from the last bit " Ah but you are reasonably fantastic | |||
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"I fucking hate starting a thread and feeling guilty for not responding to all... " A better you would respond to all of us… | |||
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"I try to be a good man, the best father I can be, a valued and reliable friend and a desirable lover to those who want me. " I think that's the most anyone could ask fupm another. | |||
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"I fucking hate starting a thread and feeling guilty for not responding to all... A better you would respond to all of us…" Yeah, well... such is the reality of life (and the fact I'm a twat). | |||
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"I fucking hate starting a thread and feeling guilty for not responding to all... " Don’t be - these forums posts are like digital fluff in the wind but it’s appreciated if you engage now and again.. Please don’t feel obliged to respond to this post 😂 | |||
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"Morality is a human construct, objectively, there is no good or bad, no right or wrong. What we have is a set of behaviours which benefit society but nothing else. I live by society's rules but I carry an awareness that it is all essentially meaningless. Stalin murdered millions, far more than Hitler, and still the sun rises and sets, dogs bark, cats prowl, the grass grows and babies still sleep soundly at night. Nothing cares and in a thousand years no one will even remember it happened at all." It's a sobering and realistic take on it all... but the whole spirit of it is - what kind of person do you want to be in your limited existence? | |||
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"Being serious for a moment, I've definitely become an enhanced version of myself recently. The past 2-3 years has been incredibly testing, yet informative as I've learned so much about who I am. I've been through a LOT of shit in my life, from a young age. I won't go into detail, but it's pretty bad. Still get the occasional arsehole who tries to ruin my life, but overall I can handle it better than ever. The biggest change came from when at the age of 40, I learned that I've had ADHD my entire life. It was like finding all the rogue bits of a puzzle and finally completing it, to reveal a picture of me. Everything makes sense now. I'm aware of so much. Behaviours, moods, thought processes, all monitored and adjusted for. Granted, I still have shit days but that knowledge about ADHD changed the game. I learned everything I could, reflecting, assessing, comparing this to that. I no longer beat myself about feeling certain ways. It's hardwired. Can't change everything, y'know. Now that's okay, I can accept it. I hated myself when I was younger, never knowing why I felt certain ways, unable to achieve any substantial goals in life, wishing I was a different person or just not here to battle constantly with it. There was a point after some trouble from a (now ex-)friend, which made me pack my bags and almost get on the bus to the nearest mental health hospital. Since then, while I haven't been able to sort certain aspects of my life out, I've completely changed in regards to my mental health struggles. It never goes away, but man, it's so much easier than before. Knowledge freed me. I'll never be able to thank one of my friends enough for showing me a huge list of spectrum behaviours and encouraging me to look if I could see myself amongst them. While reading the information on ADHD, I cried. It was the first time I've ever seen myself on paper. Tangible, there for everyone else to see as well. Always struggled explaining how I felt, to the various plethora of psychiatrist and therapists throughout my life. My mother was right about one thing. I wasn't a typical child, that's for sure. Have to give her some credit for that lol. Nowadays, while I'm still not completely happy with who I am, I do at least accept it. I see what can be changed, what can't and for the first time in 42 years on this planet, I'm feeling alright. Even with the nonsense that life still loves to throw my way (honestly, a break any time soon please lol), I'm alright. Apologies if that's too personal, admin. Feel free to delete if needed. I love to share. 😅" At 41, I've just been (in the last fews months) diagnosed as ADHD too, so a lot of that resonated with me. It's definitely interesting when you pick things apart to better understand yourself. | |||
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"Being serious for a moment, I've definitely become an enhanced version of myself recently. The past 2-3 years has been incredibly testing, yet informative as I've learned so much about who I am. I've been through a LOT of shit in my life, from a young age. I won't go into detail, but it's pretty bad. Still get the occasional arsehole who tries to ruin my life, but overall I can handle it better than ever. The biggest change came from when at the age of 40, I learned that I've had ADHD my entire life. It was like finding all the rogue bits of a puzzle and finally completing it, to reveal a picture of me. Everything makes sense now. I'm aware of so much. Behaviours, moods, thought processes, all monitored and adjusted for. Granted, I still have shit days but that knowledge about ADHD changed the game. I learned everything I could, reflecting, assessing, comparing this to that. I no longer beat myself about feeling certain ways. It's hardwired. Can't change everything, y'know. Now that's okay, I can accept it. I hated myself when I was younger, never knowing why I felt certain ways, unable to achieve any substantial goals in life, wishing I was a different person or just not here to battle constantly with it. There was a point after some trouble from a (now ex-)friend, which made me pack my bags and almost get on the bus to the nearest mental health hospital. Since then, while I haven't been able to sort certain aspects of my life out, I've completely changed in regards to my mental health struggles. It never goes away, but man, it's so much easier than before. Knowledge freed me. I'll never be able to thank one of my friends enough for showing me a huge list of spectrum behaviours and encouraging me to look if I could see myself amongst them. While reading the information on ADHD, I cried. It was the first time I've ever seen myself on paper. Tangible, there for everyone else to see as well. Always struggled explaining how I felt, to the various plethora of psychiatrist and therapists throughout my life. My mother was right about one thing. I wasn't a typical child, that's for sure. Have to give her some credit for that lol. Nowadays, while I'm still not completely happy with who I am, I do at least accept it. I see what can be changed, what can't and for the first time in 42 years on this planet, I'm feeling alright. Even with the nonsense that life still loves to throw my way (honestly, a break any time soon please lol), I'm alright. Apologies if that's too personal, admin. Feel free to delete if needed. I love to share. 😅 At 41, I've just been (in the last fews months) diagnosed as ADHD too, so a lot of that resonated with me. It's definitely interesting when you pick things apart to better understand yourself." You’ll find a lot of engineers with ADHD, it can be beneficial, but on Fab there are a lot of ‘neurospicy’ people (I’ve heard it called). ADHD types thrive on New Relationship Energy, swinging appeals to those on the spectrum, bipolar… you name it. All types are here | |||
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". You’ll find a lot of engineers with ADHD, it can be beneficial, but on Fab there are a lot of ‘neurospicy’ people (I’ve heard it called). ADHD types thrive on New Relationship Energy, swinging appeals to those on the spectrum, bipolar… you name it. All types are here" I'm not new here and this thread isn't about that. But appreciate the your input. | |||
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". You’ll find a lot of engineers with ADHD, it can be beneficial, but on Fab there are a lot of ‘neurospicy’ people (I’ve heard it called). ADHD types thrive on New Relationship Energy, swinging appeals to those on the spectrum, bipolar… you name it. All types are here I'm not new here and this thread isn't about that. But appreciate the your input." Apologies, just realised… ☺️ | |||
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"At 41, I've just been (in the last fews months) diagnosed as ADHD too, so a lot of that resonated with me. It's definitely interesting when you pick things apart to better understand yourself." Oh, that's fantastic! 😊 I'm glad you've now got A Reason Why. That's what I see it as, not an excuse. It's a reason why. Man, it's good to know people are out there looking for answers. I'm still waiting for the final bit of faffing around prior to assessment date to be done, but everything lines up too perfectly. My GP is absolutely certain, as we've had some good chats over the years and he knows me quite well. I know, right. It's an eye opener, for sure. 😄 Good thing is, now mental health is becoming less of a taboo subject (and rightly so, considering the impact it has), there are vast amounts of tools and resources out there. If you're ever wondering what to watch one day, have a peek at the YouTube channel 'How To ADHD' and you might find some really interesting things there. I found it quite nice to hear someone else talking about their own experiences, as I reviewed my own. Also the comments sections on the videos are wonderful little neurodivergent communities, with so much support, stories and knowledge being passed around. | |||
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