Join us FREE, we're FREE to use
Web's largest swingers site since 2006.
Already registered?
Login here
Join us FREE, we're FREE to use
Web's largest swingers site since 2006.
Already registered?
Login here
 | Back to forum list |
| Back to The Lounge |
| Jump to newest |  |
 | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"I can't count how many times that has happened to me, get used to it." Maybe a abacus might help you there? I'd rather just find someone with a backbone than get used to that shid | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Welcome to FAB 🤣🤣🤣🤣" Not exclusive to FAB unfortunately | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Was the flowing conversation sexual? " Not limited to, no. Like genuine get to know conversation covering any topic that we touched on. Flirty, light hearted and banterful. I could understand if it was just sexual but I wouldn't be interested in solely sexual conversation, boring to say the least. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"There are people who this never happens to. There are people who this frequently happens to. Maybe the people who it frequently happens to should liase with the people who it never happens to, find out what the people it never happens to are doing, or not doing, and then the people who it frequently happens to will no longer have it happen to them." The reason it never happens to me is because I don’t get people interested in meeting me in the first place  | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"There are people who this never happens to. There are people who this frequently happens to. Maybe the people who it frequently happens to should liase with the people who it never happens to, find out what the people it never happens to are doing, or not doing, and then the people who it frequently happens to will no longer have it happen to them. The reason it never happens to me is because I don’t get people interested in meeting me in the first place "Nice flex Pickle! 😎 | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"There are people who this never happens to. There are people who this frequently happens to. Maybe the people who it frequently happens to should liase with the people who it never happens to, find out what the people it never happens to are doing, or not doing, and then the people who it frequently happens to will no longer have it happen to them. The reason it never happens to me is because I don’t get people interested in meeting me in the first place
Nice flex Pickle! 😎"Thank you, Julie. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"I can't count how many times that has happened to me, get used to it. Maybe a abacus might help you there? I'd rather just find someone with a backbone than get used to that shid" perhaps there should be a "not looking for invertebrates" preference? | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"There are people who this never happens to. There are people who this frequently happens to. Maybe the people who it frequently happens to should liase with the people who it never happens to, find out what the people it never happens to are doing, or not doing, and then the people who it frequently happens to will no longer have it happen to them. The reason it never happens to me is because I don’t get people interested in meeting me in the first place "You say that a lot, Stephen, that no-one ever wants to meet you. Is it true? You're very popular in the forums, does that popularity not manifest into meets where you're not just socialising? Asking for a friend. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"OP, that is really frustrating, I'm sorry that happened. People on this site get cold feet for all sorts of reasons. And you do get some people pretending to be something they're not as it's a way to get attention and replies. " Cold feet, change of plans is all fine and afterall a womans perogative, I understand that but like to ignore, block and disappear is my issue. Just communicate that its not what you want and I'll understand. Not like I'm going to kick off, I'll make other plans, not a issue at all. Probably a 40 year old man with yellow whatsit fingers who lives in his mums basement 🤣 | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"There are people who this never happens to. There are people who this frequently happens to. Maybe the people who it frequently happens to should liase with the people who it never happens to, find out what the people it never happens to are doing, or not doing, and then the people who it frequently happens to will no longer have it happen to them. The reason it never happens to me is because I don’t get people interested in meeting me in the first place
You say that a lot, Stephen, that no-one ever wants to meet you. Is it true? You're very popular in the forums, does that popularity not manifest into meets where you're not just socialising? Asking for a friend."Hardly popular on here. Familiar. But no people interacting with me in the forums don’t equal meets. We’re all single guys at the end of the day. Struggle is the same. I’ve got lovely platonic friends on here that I meet and catch up with. But sex seems hard to find for guys on here in general. Forum ‘popularity’ is certainly not something that makes it any easier. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"There are people who this never happens to. There are people who this frequently happens to. Maybe the people who it frequently happens to should liase with the people who it never happens to, find out what the people it never happens to are doing, or not doing, and then the people who it frequently happens to will no longer have it happen to them. The reason it never happens to me is because I don’t get people interested in meeting me in the first place
You say that a lot, Stephen, that no-one ever wants to meet you. Is it true? You're very popular in the forums, does that popularity not manifest into meets where you're not just socialising? Asking for a friend.
Hardly popular on here. Familiar. But no people interacting with me in the forums don’t equal meets. We’re all single guys at the end of the day. Struggle is the same. I’ve got lovely platonic friends on here that I meet and catch up with. But sex seems hard to find for guys on here in general. Forum ‘popularity’ is certainly not something that makes it any easier. "I'd disagree on the popularity aspect but thanks for answering honestly. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"OP, that is really frustrating, I'm sorry that happened. People on this site get cold feet for all sorts of reasons. And you do get some people pretending to be something they're not as it's a way to get attention and replies. Cold feet, change of plans is all fine and afterall a womans perogative, I understand that but like to ignore, block and disappear is my issue. Just communicate that its not what you want and I'll understand. Not like I'm going to kick off, I'll make other plans, not a issue at all. Probably a 40 year old man with yellow whatsit fingers who lives in his mums basement 🤣" Your last line here gives me a hint as to what possibly went wrong. Relying purely on message exchanges on here to engage with someone, chat and make plans to meet, with no additional input is fraught with risk. You're literally just exchanging words on a screen with a complete stranger. Sure, if you can see multiple recent verifications from sources that also have multiple recent veris, including maybe social meets, club visits and play meets, you can be pretty sure they're real. None or maybe one or two, often from a long time ago in a galaxy far away? That's kind of a red flag to me. Maybe try and go that extra mile in future and have a phone call, a video chat or even just arrange a meet for a coffee if they're local. That often saves any disappointment and reduces the odds on you being stood up or duped by someone who isn't who they claim to be. Asking for a phone chat costs nothing. Likewise a quick video conversation. If they're not willing to do that then it's in your hands as to whether you want to plan any physical meet, but in my head someone unwilling to speak on the phone is going to find it far easier to ghost you or string you along than than someone willing to get to know you better in a real conversation. Better luck next time OP. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"There are people who this never happens to. There are people who this frequently happens to. Maybe the people who it frequently happens to should liase with the people who it never happens to, find out what the people it never happens to are doing, or not doing, and then the people who it frequently happens to will no longer have it happen to them. The reason it never happens to me is because I don’t get people interested in meeting me in the first place "
We actually don't believe you Mr P. We all know that you are a sex god and no one can resist your charms  | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"OP, that is really frustrating, I'm sorry that happened. People on this site get cold feet for all sorts of reasons. And you do get some people pretending to be something they're not as it's a way to get attention and replies. Cold feet, change of plans is all fine and afterall a womans perogative, I understand that but like to ignore, block and disappear is my issue. Just communicate that its not what you want and I'll understand. Not like I'm going to kick off, I'll make other plans, not a issue at all. Probably a 40 year old man with yellow whatsit fingers who lives in his mums basement 🤣 Your last line here gives me a hint as to what possibly went wrong. Relying purely on message exchanges on here to engage with someone, chat and make plans to meet, with no additional input is fraught with risk. You're literally just exchanging words on a screen with a complete stranger. Sure, if you can see multiple recent verifications from sources that also have multiple recent veris, including maybe social meets, club visits and play meets, you can be pretty sure they're real. None or maybe one or two, often from a long time ago in a galaxy far away? That's kind of a red flag to me. Maybe try and go that extra mile in future and have a phone call, a video chat or even just arrange a meet for a coffee if they're local. That often saves any disappointment and reduces the odds on you being stood up or duped by someone who isn't who they claim to be. Asking for a phone chat costs nothing. Likewise a quick video conversation. If they're not willing to do that then it's in your hands as to whether you want to plan any physical meet, but in my head someone unwilling to speak on the phone is going to find it far easier to ghost you or string you along than than someone willing to get to know you better in a real conversation. Better luck next time OP. " I'm sorry but I disagree. I have one verification to prove I am real. Lots of verifications means nothing. I choose not to show any at all or even a summary. Doesn't mean I am not real. I also will not do a video call. It feels fake and false. I don't even with my family or friends so certainly not with someone I've never met. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Ignore me, just venting but I can't understand why someone would spend days of flowing conversation to then full on ghost me on the day we made plans. Whats the problem saying that you can't make it. Just seems a bit spineless to me "Welcome to the twilight world of FAB. FAB draws from the whole of society, a spectrum from the delusional loner to engaging decency and everywhere in between. Take a look at some of forum threads that start as an open, honest question or statement and watch as they decend into a quagmire of lunacy. Don't be too despondent plenty of lovely people on here, can be a bit of a trawl though.  | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"OP, that is really frustrating, I'm sorry that happened. People on this site get cold feet for all sorts of reasons. And you do get some people pretending to be something they're not as it's a way to get attention and replies. Cold feet, change of plans is all fine and afterall a womans perogative, I understand that but like to ignore, block and disappear is my issue. Just communicate that its not what you want and I'll understand. Not like I'm going to kick off, I'll make other plans, not a issue at all. Probably a 40 year old man with yellow whatsit fingers who lives in his mums basement 🤣 Your last line here gives me a hint as to what possibly went wrong. Relying purely on message exchanges on here to engage with someone, chat and make plans to meet, with no additional input is fraught with risk. You're literally just exchanging words on a screen with a complete stranger. Sure, if you can see multiple recent verifications from sources that also have multiple recent veris, including maybe social meets, club visits and play meets, you can be pretty sure they're real. None or maybe one or two, often from a long time ago in a galaxy far away? That's kind of a red flag to me. Maybe try and go that extra mile in future and have a phone call, a video chat or even just arrange a meet for a coffee if they're local. That often saves any disappointment and reduces the odds on you being stood up or duped by someone who isn't who they claim to be. Asking for a phone chat costs nothing. Likewise a quick video conversation. If they're not willing to do that then it's in your hands as to whether you want to plan any physical meet, but in my head someone unwilling to speak on the phone is going to find it far easier to ghost you or string you along than than someone willing to get to know you better in a real conversation. Better luck next time OP. " It wasn't on fab and voicenote conversations had occurred, many collaborating photos etc. Seemed genuine. I'm no fool and that last line just a quip. I guess I'll no know but I get knocked down, I get up again, ain't nobody gonna keep me down | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Probably a 40 year old man with yellow whatsit fingers who lives in his mums basement 🤣" Almost right there OP, but you got my age wrong, and the yellow fingers are from nicotine stains, whilst I keep my mum in the basement (luckily with her zimmer she cant get up the stairs) whilst I have taken over the rest of the house. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Probably a 40 year old man with yellow whatsit fingers who lives in his mums basement 🤣 Almost right there OP, but you got my age wrong, and the yellow fingers are from nicotine stains, whilst I keep my mum in the basement (luckily with her zimmer she cant get up the stairs) whilst I have taken over the rest of the house."  | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" I'm sorry but I disagree. I have one verification to prove I am real. Lots of verifications means nothing. I choose not to show any at all or even a summary. Doesn't mean I am not real. I also will not do a video call. It feels fake and false. I don't even with my family or friends so certainly not with someone I've never met." Completely agree re the veris, though I by the time I am meeting someone I will have had a call and possibly a video call or two as well. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"OP, that is really frustrating, I'm sorry that happened. People on this site get cold feet for all sorts of reasons. And you do get some people pretending to be something they're not as it's a way to get attention and replies. Cold feet and change of plans are all fine and after all a womans perogative, I understand that but like to ignore, block and disappear is my issue. Just communicate that its not what you want and I'll understand. Not like I'm going to kick off, I'll make other plans, not an issue at all. Probably a 40-year-old man with yellow whatsit fingers who lives in his mum's basement 🤣" Maybe just teenagers having a good laugh, or a low self-esteem woman who just panicked about the idea of you realising she is 20 years older or 20 kilos bigger than her photos, or somebody married who just wants to know if he/she still has it, or found already a shinier toy. They prefer to disappear than explain the awful truth behind their cold feet | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"There are people who this never happens to. There are people who this frequently happens to. Maybe the people who it frequently happens to should liase with the people who it never happens to, find out what the people it never happens to are doing, or not doing, and then the people who it frequently happens to will no longer have it happen to them. The reason it never happens to me is because I don’t get people interested in meeting me in the first place
We actually don't believe you Mr P. We all know that you are a sex god and no one can resist your charms "Ok you’re right. I am a sex God. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Mindset mindset mindset Everything is always a no until it is a yes… and that is up to and including having that person standing right in front of you! People are allowed to change there mind at any point… some people who would have been a yes have said something they may not even realise that then turns them into an instant no! People spend way too much time overanalysing everything…. Just concentrate on being your best self rather than worrying about everything else " Think everyone blowing this thread out of proportion. Not analysing anything or saying shouldn't be able change your mind. Just speak your mind, and have the decency to say rather than just block. The reason is of no interest. Everything in life is 50/50, does or doesn't, I get that. I know what I bring to the table and thats more than most. Not worrying just do not understand why, but I probably never will. So gonna take this rental car for a drive and see where I end up 🤣 | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Better luck next time OP. I'm sorry but I disagree. I have one verification to prove I am real. Lots of verifications means nothing. I choose not to show any at all or even a summary. Doesn't mean I am not real. I also will not do a video call. It feels fake and false. I don't even with my family or friends so certainly not with someone I've never met." I also don’t display my verifications, it’s nobody’s business but my own. However for safety I do need a quick video chat, usually on the way to the social just so I know it is the person I’m meeting. Weirdly I’ll watch my phone ring at all other times and then message to see what someone wanted, but I feel much happier with a quick 2 min chat on video before meeting | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"I tend not to get drawn into that process too much. If when and after we meet there's that sense of flowing conversations, that's when I start to believe there's a potential. A relationship by text is like learning to drive through youtube videos. You watch enough and you can almost convince yourself you know how to drive, without ever getting behind the wheel." Oh gosh... so this, also! It's impossible to read text in the exact way someone wrote it (the inflections and nuances) I've come undone so many times reading into words, or seeing secondary meanings which weren't there. (Plus, as an aside, this made me laugh as my cousin once informed us he knew how to drive, as he'd read the AA Book of the Car multiple times. Boarding School kids ) | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" Better luck next time OP. I'm sorry but I disagree. I have one verification to prove I am real. Lots of verifications means nothing. I choose not to show any at all or even a summary. Doesn't mean I am not real. I also will not do a video call. It feels fake and false. I don't even with my family or friends so certainly not with someone I've never met. I also don’t display my verifications, it’s nobody’s business but my own. However for safety I do need a quick video chat, usually on the way to the social just so I know it is the person I’m meeting. Weirdly I’ll watch my phone ring at all other times and then message to see what someone wanted, but I feel much happier with a quick 2 min chat on video before meeting" I agree everyone should do what feels comfortable for them. But to say no verifications or few is a red flag is a red flag to me. And video calls to me are just uncomfortable. Maybe a quick phone call sure. But that isn't a necessity for me either. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Mindset mindset mindset Everything is always a no until it is a yes… and that is up to and including having that person standing right in front of you! People are allowed to change there mind at any point… some people who would have been a yes have said something they may not even realise that then turns them into an instant no! People spend way too much time overanalysing everything…. Just concentrate on being your best self rather than worrying about everything else Think everyone blowing this thread out of proportion. Not analysing anything or saying shouldn't be able change your mind. Just speak your mind, and have the decency to say rather than just block. The reason is of no interest. Everything in life is 50/50, does or doesn't, I get that. I know what I bring to the table and thats more than most. Not worrying just do not understand why, but I probably never will. So gonna take this rental car for a drive and see where I end up 🤣 " If someone said something that turned them from an yes to an instant no.. I would cut off all communication there and then! Why open up a dialogue telling them why? So they can adjust their behaviour for the next person! (Then they are not being themselves!) People have their own processes… you have yours… I have enough respect as to not pick apart the way others do their swinging… If it comes down to comfort ability levels! then so be it | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Don't even get me started on backbones and growing a pair of balls 🤬🤬" There's all manner of other things that I'd like to get you started on and they aren't it  | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Don't even get me started on backbones and growing a pair of balls 🤬🤬 There's all manner of other things that I'd like to get you started on and they aren't it "
Oh what do you have in mind | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"OP, that is really frustrating, I'm sorry that happened. People on this site get cold feet for all sorts of reasons. And you do get some people pretending to be something they're not as it's a way to get attention and replies. Cold feet, change of plans is all fine and afterall a womans perogative, I understand that but like to ignore, block and disappear is my issue. Just communicate that its not what you want and I'll understand. Not like I'm going to kick off, I'll make other plans, not a issue at all. Probably a 40 year old man with yellow whatsit fingers who lives in his mums basement 🤣 Your last line here gives me a hint as to what possibly went wrong. Relying purely on message exchanges on here to engage with someone, chat and make plans to meet, with no additional input is fraught with risk. You're literally just exchanging words on a screen with a complete stranger. Sure, if you can see multiple recent verifications from sources that also have multiple recent veris, including maybe social meets, club visits and play meets, you can be pretty sure they're real. None or maybe one or two, often from a long time ago in a galaxy far away? That's kind of a red flag to me. Maybe try and go that extra mile in future and have a phone call, a video chat or even just arrange a meet for a coffee if they're local. That often saves any disappointment and reduces the odds on you being stood up or duped by someone who isn't who they claim to be. Asking for a phone chat costs nothing. Likewise a quick video conversation. If they're not willing to do that then it's in your hands as to whether you want to plan any physical meet, but in my head someone unwilling to speak on the phone is going to find it far easier to ghost you or string you along than than someone willing to get to know you better in a real conversation. Better luck next time OP. I'm sorry but I disagree. I have one verification to prove I am real. Lots of verifications means nothing. I choose not to show any at all or even a summary. Doesn't mean I am not real. I also will not do a video call. It feels fake and false. I don't even with my family or friends so certainly not with someone I've never met." And that's fine of course. From the perspective of a single guy on Fab though, especially anyone that's fallen foul to ghosting, being stood up, or duped into making plans and perhaps ending up out of pocket, then going that extra mile can help. There's no right or wrong way to 'do fab'. Everyone does their own thing and if it works for them then great. If it doesn't though......... | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Really not looking for reasons just think people should do better . Makes no odds to me, I always have contingency but if you're civilised enough to make plans, should be civil enough to cancel them. To all those defending fab and saying get used to it. Manners cost f*ck all. And if you do it so you don't get abuse, then you should know better than to think I'm going kick off 🤣. Children the lot of them" OP, you started a thread asking why people might ghost. People gave answers. Sorry if you don’t like the answers. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Was the flowing conversation sexual? Not limited to, no. Like genuine get to know conversation covering any topic that we touched on. Flirty, light hearted and banterful. I could understand if it was just sexual but I wouldn't be interested in solely sexual conversation, boring to say the least. " I’ll take it as it was sexual then. Plenty of wank material for them, sorry OP. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Really not looking for reasons just think people should do better . Makes no odds to me, I always have contingency but if you're civilised enough to make plans, should be civil enough to cancel them. To all those defending fab and saying get used to it. Manners cost f*ck all. And if you do it so you don't get abuse, then you should know better than to think I'm going kick off 🤣. Children the lot of them" But as we know… stories have two sides… and we are only hearing one For example (and I am not saying this the following has happened) You may have said something, they changed their mind cutting off contact, you now start a thread painting you as a victim , and they now have to read it now has a shit ton of posts! Without knowing the whole story, all we have is a story! If as you say you have contingencies, water off a ducks back, move on! That may well be the most adult thing to do rather than dwelling | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Probably a 40 year old man with yellow whatsit fingers who lives in his mums basement 🤣" You're probably not too far off the mark. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Really not looking for reasons just think people should do better . Makes no odds to me, I always have contingency but if you're civilised enough to make plans, should be civil enough to cancel them. To all those defending fab and saying get used to it. Manners cost f*ck all. And if you do it so you don't get abuse, then you should know better than to think I'm going kick off 🤣. Children the lot of them OP, you started a thread asking why people might ghost. People gave answers. Sorry if you don’t like the answers." Lol I literally just asked about backbones but thanks for contributing your thought. All answers appreciated even if they aren't applicable regardless | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Ignore me, just venting but I can't understand why someone would spend days of flowing conversation to then full on ghost me on the day we made plans. Whats the problem saying that you can't make it. Just seems a bit spineless to me "This is your OP. Thought you were looking for answers 🤷♀️ No worries. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Ignore me, just venting but I can't understand why someone would spend days of flowing conversation to then full on ghost me on the day we made plans. Whats the problem saying that you can't make it. Just seems a bit spineless to me
This is your OP. Thought you were looking for answers 🤷♀️ No worries."Just venting really. Needed an outlet. Her reasons for ghosting is absolutely none of my business and I am not a victim, if she just said she won't be meeting, that would be fine and I still would have wished her a wonderful day but no, its fine to do and completely normalised by pretty much everyone so that makes it ok. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| Post new Message to Thread |
| back to top |  |
