FabSwingers.com forum: face pics

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I've seen a few profiles where they say something like "send a face pic with your first message or I will delete you".

I get why people want to see your face but is it fair when they don't have one on there profile to begin with?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But how do you know that they don't have one? Could be private and therefore you would not see it in public or friends only pictures.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For example me, I may have a hidden profile but I do also have my pics set to private at the moment and I have a face picture available on request.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you feel the profile is genuine and you are genuine in wanting to meet I don't see there being much of a problem tbh.

Just my opinion tho.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Maybe its me, I just don't think its fair

They want a picture to see if they find you attractive but you have to message them without knowing what they look like

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Maybe its me, I just don't think its fair

They want a picture to see if they find you attractive but you have to message them without knowing what they look like"

Someone has to take the first step or else no meets would ever happen!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There would probably be more meets if everyone practised what they preached

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

its all a gamble. even if you send one and theres interest you might not like the other persons face in return

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

"There would probably be more meets if everyone practised what they preached "

Most people seem to go for the first contact sends first pic rule, so if I send the first message to someone of attach a pic so they can decide if they want to message back. If they contact me first then they can attach one so I can decide x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There would probably be more meets if everyone practised what they preached "

Having looked at your profile, you have no face picture public (which is fine), and no friends only pictures so how on earth can you say that, I'm supposed to be a mind reader then and guess you have a face picture available

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By *odareyouMan
over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

"There would probably be more meets if everyone practised what they preached "

If something in their profile interests you enough to message them sooner or later someone has to bite the bullet, my thoughts are If I make first contact I send mine first,, (that normally stops all meets

You can always wait for the ladies or couples to contact you with a picture,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There would probably be more meets if everyone practised what they preached

probably available privately.?!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There would probably be more meets if everyone practised what they preached

probably available privately.?!

F*ck me! They could be

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Maybe its me, I just don't think its fair

They want a picture to see if they find you attractive but you have to message them without knowing what they look like"

It is a matter of power and control and (generally) we all want it.

We can discuss it til the cows come home but what it amounts to is for whatever their reasons, people want you to compromise your own position without wanting to compromise their own.

Sometimes it is a matter of discretion i.e. potential that they may know you

Sometimes it is a matter of they want to see if they fancy you before they show themselves.

This generally goes along the lines of if they fancy you, you may get a pic back, if they don't, a no thanks without a pic, a delete or a block (or sometimes all 3)

Sometimes it is simply someone fancying a wank at your expense.

Whatever the reason, there is no changing it.

The only solution is if their approach doesn't fit how you wish to proceed, then just click back and move on to the next profile.

Problem solved !

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Maybe its me, I just don't think its fair

They want a picture to see if they find you attractive but you have to message them without knowing what they look like

It is a matter of power and control and (generally) we all want it.

We can discuss it til the cows come home but what it amounts to is for whatever their reasons, people want you to compromise your own position without wanting to compromise their own.

Sometimes it is a matter of discretion i.e. potential that they may know you

Sometimes it is a matter of they want to see if they fancy you before they show themselves.

This generally goes along the lines of if they fancy you, you may get a pic back, if they don't, a no thanks without a pic, a delete or a block (or sometimes all 3)

Sometimes it is simply someone fancying a wank at your expense.

Whatever the reason, there is no changing it.

The only solution is if their approach doesn't fit how you wish to proceed, then just click back and move on to the next profile.

Problem solved ! "

Good answer

And so what if i don't have a face pic for public or friends. I'm not demanding people send me one first . Which is the point I was originally making

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

it is only fair and common sense if you are contacting someone with the hope of meeting them you send a face pic so they can see who they are talking to, cant see your point at all about it it not been fair after all it isnt blind date.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Maybe its me, I just don't think its fair

They want a picture to see if they find you attractive but you have to message them without knowing what they look like"

No,you don't have to. you may chose to but that's your choice. If you feel its not fair don't mail them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Maybe its me, I just don't think its fair

They want a picture to see if they find you attractive but you have to message them without knowing what they look like"

Simple answer is, DON'T MESSAGE THEM THEN!! Or do you you think, "mmm, nice tits, that'll do for me"!?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A top tip is to ensure your face pic is not anything you'd be embarrassed about if your mother saw it - i.e. attached to a pic of you stark bollock naked!!

Allows for 'plausible deniability' should it ever fall into the wrong hands as you can claim it's simply been lifted off bookface or t'internet and used by some deranged pervert (no - not you - another one!) to set up a fake profile!

Keep a clear line between the rude and the normal. And chop your head off any starkers/play pics.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A top tip is to ensure your face pic is not anything you'd be embarrassed about if your mother saw it - i.e. attached to a pic of you stark bollock naked!!

Keep a clear line between the rude and the normal. And chop your head off any starkers/play pics.

Your mother would be so proud

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If your happy to send a face pic via message then I'm happy if not sling your hook my hearties

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By *hoosy_strumpetCouple
over a year ago

W S AREA

dont you think its best to see people on cam before a meet?...ive had a LOT of messages with pics only to find out when ive seen them on cam the pics they have on there profile are about 10 years old!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"dont you think its best to see people on cam before a meet?...ive had a LOT of messages with pics only to find out when ive seen them on cam the pics they have on there profile are about 10 years old!

Maybe in theory. But not everyone on here is comfortable going on cam, or can't due to not having one. I'm only ever on here using my phone and it doesn't integrate cams.

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By *hoosy_strumpetCouple
over a year ago

W S AREA

Maybe in theory. But not everyone on here is comfortable going on cam, or can't due to not having one. I'm only ever on here using my phone and it doesn't integrate cams."

it was only a thought

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By *rDigital_CurvygirlCouple
over a year ago

Stroud Area

It doesnt matter what the profile or pic says it can all be faked for a number of different reasons.

To this end we socialise and meet in a club atmosphere only.

Its safe, secure, no fakers, all there for the same reason and you know your activities stay in the club and arent shared with the world on a porn site.

The other person may not be what you want, you simply move on and have a good time, but if they are genuine and nice you could end up with some wonderful sexy friends.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe in theory. But not everyone on here is comfortable going on cam, or can't due to not having one. I'm only ever on here using my phone and it doesn't integrate cams.

it was only a thought

Lol, maybe we could ask the person to hold up a newspaper with that days date on it just like kidnappers do, lol,

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By *hoosy_strumpetCouple
over a year ago

W S AREA

Maybe in theory. But not everyone on here is comfortable going on cam, or can't due to not having one. I'm only ever on here using my phone and it doesn't integrate cams.

it was only a thought

Lol, maybe we could ask the person to hold up a newspaper with that days date on it just like kidnappers do, lol,

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"I've seen a few profiles where they say something like "send a face pic with your first message or I will delete you".

I get why people want to see your face but is it fair when they don't have one on there profile to begin with?"

People may ask for whatever they like on their profile, just as you have the choice to avoid - can't see the problem myself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe in theory. But not everyone on here is comfortable going on cam, or can't due to not having one. I'm only ever on here using my phone and it doesn't integrate cams.

it was only a thought

Lol, maybe we could ask the person to hold up a newspaper with that days date on it just like kidnappers do, lol,

Don't joke!!!

I've been asked to do that before!

I didn't - just said "wouldn't it be easier just to say hi on Skype?". Luckily they agreed as I haven't bought a newspaper in years!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe in theory. But not everyone on here is comfortable going on cam, or can't due to not having one. I'm only ever on here using my phone and it doesn't integrate cams.

it was only a thought

Lol, maybe we could ask the person to hold up a newspaper with that days date on it just like kidnappers do, lol,

Don't joke!!!

I've been asked to do that before!

I didn't - just said "wouldn't it be easier just to say hi on Skype?". Luckily they agreed as I haven't bought a newspaper in years!!"

Really?!

I thought men of your age relied on page 3 of the Sun

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Let's face it, this is what I actually look like after a day down the pit

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe in theory. But not everyone on here is comfortable going on cam, or can't due to not having one. I'm only ever on here using my phone and it doesn't integrate cams.

it was only a thought

Lol, maybe we could ask the person to hold up a newspaper with that days date on it just like kidnappers do, lol,

Don't joke!!!

I've been asked to do that before!

I didn't - just said "wouldn't it be easier just to say hi on Skype?". Luckily they agreed as I haven't bought a newspaper in years!!"

I did it once, but only paper the shnp had left was the daily sport! Was told to 'get to fuck ya perv'! You can't win eh!

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By *imjohnCouple
over a year ago

Clacton on sea, Essex

"I've seen a few profiles where they say something like "send a face pic with your first message or I will delete you".

I get why people want to see your face but is it fair when they don't have one on there profile to begin with?"

We always find they are the ones themselves that don't provide facial pics.

It is nice to see facial pic's of who you are looking/going to meet,its understandable they might be in their private pics but they should understand that yours might be too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do people ask for face pics but not have one to send in reply whether its be email, or proivately on here?

Just cos you make the initial contact doesn't mean your obligued then to meet them.. Just means you like the sound of their profile and mail them to find out more.. Is that not how things work?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've seen a few profiles where they say something like "send a face pic with your first message or I will delete you".

I get why people want to see your face but is it fair when they don't have one on there profile to begin with?

We always find they are the ones themselves that don't provide facial pics.

It is nice to see facial pic's of who you are looking/going to meet,its understandable they might be in their private pics but they should understand that yours might be too."

If they ask to see a face pic if your going to mail them then I guess they are completely understandable that your face pic maybe private and you need to attach it to the message..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

See I dunno about this, I can't really have a face pic publicly because of my job.

I can send it privately, if the person I'm sending it too isn't affiliated with my job.

But if I don't see their face, I won't know!

And then if I'm sending the face pic with every new message I send, then I may as well have a public face pic!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There would probably be more meets if everyone practised what they preached "

I personally think who ever sends the first message should attach the face pic first

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"See I dunno about this, I can't really have a face pic publicly because of my job.

I can send it privately, if the person I'm sending it too isn't affiliated with my job.

But if I don't see their face, I won't know!

And then if I'm sending the face pic with every new message I send, then I may as well have a public face pic! "

see I don't get this, if someone on here, and works in same field, unlikely to say anything to you if they recognise you, as they also using the site.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"See I dunno about this, I can't really have a face pic publicly because of my job.

I can send it privately, if the person I'm sending it too isn't affiliated with my job.

But if I don't see their face, I won't know!

And then if I'm sending the face pic with every new message I send, then I may as well have a public face pic! "

publically anyone on the site can see it.. privately you can choose wisely who you send it to...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've seen a few profiles where they say something like "send a face pic with your first message or I will delete you".

I get why people want to see your face but is it fair when they don't have one on there profile to begin with?"
my profile asks for face pic so I can see if I like the look of them and I will always send one in return whether I do or dont like the look

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"See I dunno about this, I can't really have a face pic publicly because of my job.

I can send it privately, if the person I'm sending it too isn't affiliated with my job.

But if I don't see their face, I won't know!

And then if I'm sending the face pic with every new message I send, then I may as well have a public face pic! "

This is my thoughts exactly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"See I dunno about this, I can't really have a face pic publicly because of my job.

I can send it privately, if the person I'm sending it too isn't affiliated with my job.

But if I don't see their face, I won't know!

And then if I'm sending the face pic with every new message I send, then I may as well have a public face pic!

This is my thoughts exactly"

as i said.. its far from public when it is private.. as you can choose who sees it.. if there isnt enough info on someones profile for you to judge if it is a safe to send the pic.. pass them by,.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

see I don't get this, if someone on here, and works in same field, unlikely to say anything to you if they recognise you, as they also using the site."

It's not colleagues I'd be worried about!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

as i said.. its far from public when it is private.. as you can choose who sees it.. if there isnt enough info on someones profile for you to judge if it is a safe to send the pic.. pass them by,."

Yah, that's what I do.

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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago

glasgow

Why would sending a face pic,showing you fully clothed,be any problem.

I know it's a swingers site,but it's not compulsory to get your kit off for every pic.

Ps if your a hot chic,disregard above.

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By *oulou45Woman
over a year ago

Bucks

"Maybe its me, I just don't think its fair

They want a picture to see if they find you attractive but you have to message them without knowing what they look like

Someone has to take the first step or else no meets would ever happen!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

as i said.. its far from public when it is private.. as you can choose who sees it.. if there isnt enough info on someones profile for you to judge if it is a safe to send the pic.. pass them by,.

Yah, that's what I do. "

So what's the problem with sending a face pic with your message then

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

My original point was, is it fair for someone to demand a face pic with the initial first message when they don't have a public face pic for you to see first?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My original point was, is it fair for someone to demand a face pic with the initial first message when they don't have a public face pic for you to see first?"

But that isn't fair expecting others to have a public face picture when you yourself do not!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My original point was, is it fair for someone to demand a face pic with the initial first message when they don't have a public face pic for you to see first?"
If that's their choice, yes it's fair. I've no problem with that. The other person/s can decide whether to reply and send a pic if they think it will go further than the initial message. Quite simples really.

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By *uncpl2015Couple
over a year ago

Bridgend Area

"I've seen a few profiles where they say something like "send a face pic with your first message or I will delete you".

I get why people want to see your face but is it fair when they don't have one on there profile to begin with?"

Yes but they are not insisting that you have a face pic on your profile, if they were then they should have one. But if their profile requests face pic with message they will more than likely have one to send you in their reply. And this is perfectly acceptable.

If you dont want to be the first one to send a pic then leave them alone and find someone else.

If they dont like your photo they probably wont send you theirs as there is no point. whats the point sending face pic to a guy you are not attracted to and not going to meet just so that when he takes offence to being rejected (an awful lot do) you have given him ammunition to have a go at you with.. and they do.

What would be good on fab was if everyone just concentrated on their own profile and finding people whose profile and intetests and even requests matched theirs. Rather than going through the site and getting nit picky and concentrating on the profiles and people who do or say or request hell even demand things they dont agree with or that they think unfair.

Surely this site is supposed to be for fun, so be better for people to stop stressing about things that others insist on and find the ones that think along the same lines as them. surely both parties singing from the same sheet make much better music ?

Thats the way it seems to us anyway.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 04/04/13 09:09:01]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What they said.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you don't like the face, DOGGIE!! Lmao

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By *uncpl2015Couple
over a year ago

Bridgend Area

"If you don't like the face, DOGGIE!! Lmao"

sadly we have chatted to what seems really nice guys and the bits they have on show look good all seems fine.. then get a face pic.. and well 'taff wars' spring to mind.. now i like doggie style alot but no way knowing that its being given by a cast member of star wars and i dont mean the humans...

That is not applied to anyone who has sent us pics recently by the way lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pics are hardly the most reliable medium anyway. I've met plenty of folk on here who've looked cracking on photos but dog rough in real life. On the other side of the coin, I look terrible on photos but fabulous in real life ...... ish, I think, maybe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yah, that's what I do.

So what's the problem with sending a face pic with your message then"

Because when profiles are demanding a pic without showing themselves, I can't contact them in case they cause probs for me at work now or in the future when I have to look after their or other's kids.

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By *uncpl2015Couple
over a year ago

Bridgend Area

Yah, that's what I do.

So what's the problem with sending a face pic with your message then

leave them alone then and contact people who dont require face pic sent.. not everyone does.

Or if its really too dodgy being on here and being recognised maybe its not a good idea.

we put the webcam on with a guy we look to meet so we can both see faces before we meet.

Or just go to a social and meet people there if you dont like what you see speak to someone else ! This works quite well for us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Had a couple send us a massage with a face pic attached once and we sent them a very polite " no thaanks".

They then replied that as we had seen their pic, we should send them ours anyway to make it equal!

sigh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yah, that's what I do.

So what's the problem with sending a face pic with your message then

Most of us have to be discrete for one reason or another..

Just remember that if they are on here they have a lot of questions to answer aswell and if they are on here they are hardly going to think badly of you being on here.

As others say, just ignore those who want a face pic first..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Or if its really too dodgy being on here and being recognised maybe its not a good idea.

we put the webcam on with a guy we look to meet so we can both see faces before we meet.

Or just go to a social and meet people there if you dont like what you see speak to someone else ! This works quite well for us."

You might be right about not being on here, I have just used it mainly for the forums now after I rejoined.

Maybe faces only is just the way it rolls on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yah, that's what I do.

So what's the problem with sending a face pic with your message then

It might just be me but I like to meet people off here to have sex with them, not look after their kids

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yah, that's what I do.

So what's the problem with sending a face pic with your message then

but the point been they ask for a face pic, they dont say the have a public pic anywhere, so you check profile you think you match what they are looking for so you message with face pic attached, they open message check profile see you match what they want and reply with a facepic attached, or they see you dont match what they are looking for so they delete your message no harm done, really cant see where the problem is.

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