FabSwingers.com forum: Bear Attack

By *ssex_tom OP Man
26 weeks ago

Chelmsford

Reports of a bear attack in Arizona, which is situated in the United States of America near he Grand Canyon. A family were staying in log cabins in the woods and one man was watching videos with the cabin door open for ventilation when the black bear strolled in as bold as brass and attacked by swiping with his sharp paws. Hearing screams, his brother ran from the other cabin and the bear then chased the brother all the way back to his cabin, saved only by slamming the door in the bears face. The bear then sat waiting on the porch, presumably planning a counter attack. Authorities arrived and hunted the bear before 'dispatching the bear' which is an American term for 'shooting the bugger dead'. Luckily nobody died but the message is clear here. Nursery Rhymes existed for a reason to warn of the dangers of wild animals. They should not be edited or given trigger warnings. Tom would have kept his cabin door shut in case of attack. Has a nursery rhyme saved your life ,?

It's all over the news

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By *rsKOTCTWoman
26 weeks ago

Leeds

Maybe it just teaches us to close doors, if that's all it took.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
26 weeks ago

Central

Man or bear?

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By *imi_RougeWoman
26 weeks ago

Portsmouth

What was the man wearing? Maybe he should just have smiled at the bear.

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By (user no longer on site)
26 weeks ago

Wtf, they shot the bear

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By *ris GrayMan
26 weeks ago

Dorchester

If you go down to the woods today be sure of a big surprise

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan
26 weeks ago

St Leonards

Little Jack Horner stuck his thumb up my bum.

I told my Mum on him.

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By *ean counterMan
26 weeks ago

Market Harborough / Kettering

Was there any porridge available at these lodges?

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By *lowupdollTV/TS
26 weeks ago

Herts

TLDR: humans invaded bears home. Killed bear.

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
26 weeks ago

Manchester-ish

What nursery rhyme teaches us about bear danger? It should probably be obvious but I can't think of a single one

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By *ssex_tom OP Man
26 weeks ago

Chelmsford

Since 199O there have been 16 Bear attacks in Arizona but three already this year before the full tourist season starts. It is not known why this spike in bear attacks is happening but more bear stacks are likely as the tourism season starts.

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By *ssex_tom OP Man
26 weeks ago

Chelmsford

"What nursery rhyme teaches us about bear danger? It should probably be obvious but I can't think of a single one

The three little pigs. Build your house strong to ward of wild animals like wolves and bears

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By (user no longer on site)
26 weeks ago

"What nursery rhyme teaches us about bear danger? It should probably be obvious but I can't think of a single one

The three little pigs. Build your house strong to ward of wild animals like wolves and bears "

Or don't go build your house in the middle of their home.

They deserved what they got. The bear didn't.

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By *rRiosMan
26 weeks ago

dublin

"Man or bear?"

Came here to say this

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
26 weeks ago

Manchester-ish

"What nursery rhyme teaches us about bear danger? It should probably be obvious but I can't think of a single one

The three little pigs. Build your house strong to ward of wild animals like wolves and bears "

Ah, fairy tales. Not being pedantic. I just have an annoyingly categorised brain.

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By (user no longer on site)
26 weeks ago

"What nursery rhyme teaches us about bear danger? It should probably be obvious but I can't think of a single one

The three little pigs. Build your house strong to ward of wild animals like wolves and bears

Ah, fairy tales. Not being pedantic. I just have an annoyingly categorised brain.

I thought of "if you go down to the woods today"...I can only think of the rude version though and not the proper one.

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By (user no longer on site)
26 weeks ago

"What nursery rhyme teaches us about bear danger? It should probably be obvious but I can't think of a single one

The three little pigs. Build your house strong to ward of wild animals like wolves and bears

Ah, fairy tales. Not being pedantic. I just have an annoyingly categorised brain.

Meanwhile, the bears have stormed in and torn everyone to shreds. The bears care not for pedants.

And there's a moral in this story. But that would probably then be a fable so doesn't count for this particular thread.

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By *weet and SpiceCouple
26 weeks ago

Around the Midlands

"Has a nursery rhyme saved your life ,?"

I didn't go up that hill for some water after hearing about both Jack and Jill on the same day!

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By *lan157Man
26 weeks ago

a village near Haywards Heath in East Sussex

I'm smarter than the average bear.

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By *ear in the chairMan
26 weeks ago

yeah there

Grrrr

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
26 weeks ago

Manchester-ish

"What nursery rhyme teaches us about bear danger? It should probably be obvious but I can't think of a single one

The three little pigs. Build your house strong to ward of wild animals like wolves and bears

Ah, fairy tales. Not being pedantic. I just have an annoyingly categorised brain.

Meanwhile, the bears have stormed in and torn everyone to shreds. The bears care not for pedants.

And there's a moral in this story. But that would probably then be a fable so doesn't count for this particular thread."

I think "the bears care not for pedants" would make an awesome t-shirt. I might get one made.

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By (user no longer on site)
26 weeks ago

"What nursery rhyme teaches us about bear danger? It should probably be obvious but I can't think of a single one

The three little pigs. Build your house strong to ward of wild animals like wolves and bears

Ah, fairy tales. Not being pedantic. I just have an annoyingly categorised brain.

Meanwhile, the bears have stormed in and torn everyone to shreds. The bears care not for pedants.

And there's a moral in this story. But that would probably then be a fable so doesn't count for this particular thread.

I think "the bears care not for pedants" would make an awesome t-shirt. I might get one made.

Get one made, upload a picture and we'll make it top of the hot pics.

The first Tom related number one.

Apart from that thread about piss.

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By *ot to giggleWoman
26 weeks ago

Coventry

bear with it - im sure i can find the right nursery rhyme!

wouldnt be red riding hood - nope that was definitely the manwolf

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By *estLondonDeepMan
26 weeks ago

London

So are some women still choosing a bear over a man?

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By *ris GrayMan
26 weeks ago

Dorchester

"TLDR: humans invaded bears home. Killed bear. "
humans invade everything why should the woods be any different

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan
26 weeks ago

St Leonards

"So are some women still choosing a bear over a man? "

From what I can make out so far, only if it pisses on their t-shirt.

But I'll admit I'm not following this too well.

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By *hunky GentMan
26 weeks ago

Maldon and Peterborough

It wasn't me - just saying

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By *heRazorsEdgeMan
26 weeks ago

Wales/ All over UK

"What was the man wearing? Maybe he should just have smiled at the bear."

If he didn’t want to get attacked by a bear he shouldn’t have been dressed as if he wanted a bear’s attention

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By *oquars19458Man
26 weeks ago

sheffield

Its just the bear necessities….

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By *ssex_tom OP Man
26 weeks ago

Chelmsford

The victim sufferers from a genetic disease of the mind and his cries were barely audible. A tragedy was avoided by his very brave brother who distracted the evil bugger before someone was killed. At the very least he should be congratulated by he President and presented with a medal

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By *ripfillMan
26 weeks ago

havant

I hoped it was Donald Trump - … get out of that one you you narcissistic clown

( not biased in any way )

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By *nnCeeWoman
26 weeks ago

East of Eden, West of Hell

"What nursery rhyme teaches us about bear danger? It should probably be obvious but I can't think of a single one

The three little pigs. Build your house strong to ward of wild animals like wolves and bears

Ah, fairy tales. Not being pedantic. I just have an annoyingly categorised brain.

Meanwhile, the bears have stormed in and torn everyone to shreds. The bears care not for pedants.

And there's a moral in this story. But that would probably then be a fable so doesn't count for this particular thread.

I think "the bears care not for pedants" would make an awesome t-shirt. I might get one made.

Yes! Yes! Yes!

Want!

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By *.R.MMan
26 weeks ago

Norfolk

I met a bear once. He growled “I’m a………………………. Bear”

So I said “ why the big pause(paws)”

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By (user no longer on site)
26 weeks ago

When I want the latest Hunters News, I always log into fabs forums first

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By (user no longer on site)
26 weeks ago

Pity they had to shoot it, if it was a person they’d offer it rehabilitation and a new house.

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By (user no longer on site)
26 weeks ago

I got attacked by a monkey in my jungle bungalow in Thailand few days ago, it saw me eating crisps on the porch. My own fault though. Still great being in middle of wild life though

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By *.R.MMan
26 weeks ago

Norfolk

"I got attacked by a monkey in my jungle bungalow in Thailand few days ago, it saw me eating crisps on the porch. My own fault though. Still great being in middle of wild life though

Did you spank your monkey for stealing your crisps?

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By *eavenNhellCouple
26 weeks ago

carrbrook stalybridge

"Pity they had to shoot it, if it was a person they’d offer it rehabilitation and a new house."
doubt it if it was a black bear !

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By *eliz NelsonMan
26 weeks ago

The Tantric Tea Shop

I rely on my satnav!! Those bear left and bear right hints are priceless...have never been mauled yet!!

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By *ea monkeyMan
26 weeks ago

Manchester (he/him)

"What nursery rhyme teaches us about bear danger? It should probably be obvious but I can't think of a single one

Goldilocks. Although that teaches us the danger of eating porridge when it’s too hot

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By *ea monkeyMan
26 weeks ago

Manchester (he/him)

Thanks Tom. I rolled my eyes so hard at your OP that it dislodged an eyelash that had been bothering me all day, so finally some good came from your continuing presence

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
26 weeks ago

North East Scotland, mostly

"Thanks Tom. I rolled my eyes so hard at your OP that it dislodged an eyelash that had been bothering me all day, so finally some good came from your continuing presence "

Ah come on, where would you get your breaking news if not for Tom highlighting the top stories of the day?!

Mrs TMN x

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
26 weeks ago

North East Scotland, mostly

Hickory dickory dock, the bear ran up the clock?

Beary, beary, quite contrary?

Mary had a little bear?

This is a puzzle, Tom.

Mrs TMN x

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By *mma29Couple
26 weeks ago

wirral

[Removed by poster at 28/05/24 16:44:44]

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By *mma29Couple
26 weeks ago

wirral

Had they booked a Bear bnb by mistake?

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By *ea monkeyMan
26 weeks ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Thanks Tom. I rolled my eyes so hard at your OP that it dislodged an eyelash that had been bothering me all day, so finally some good came from your continuing presence

Ah come on, where would you get your breaking news if not for Tom highlighting the top stories of the day?!

Mrs TMN x"

Probably from less right wing leaning vendors, like Fox

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By *ulie.your. bottom. slutTV/TS
26 weeks ago

Glasgow

Still people are more of a danger than most wildlife is to other humans. But if a animal attack, it makes good headlines.

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
26 weeks ago

Manchester-ish

"What nursery rhyme teaches us about bear danger? It should probably be obvious but I can't think of a single one

Goldilocks. Although that teaches us the danger of eating porridge when it’s too hot"

That's not a nursery rhyme though. It's a fairy tale.

(ok, maybe I am a pedant and the bears don't care for me)

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
26 weeks ago

Manchester-ish

"Hickory dickory dock, the bear ran up the clock?

Beary, beary, quite contrary?

Mary had a little bear?

This is a puzzle, Tom.

Mrs TMN x"

Baa baa black bear

Humpty Dumpty sat on a bear

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
26 weeks ago

North East Scotland, mostly

"Hickory dickory dock, the bear ran up the clock?

Beary, beary, quite contrary?

Mary had a little bear?

This is a puzzle, Tom.

Mrs TMN x

Baa baa black bear

Humpty Dumpty sat on a bear

Old King Cole was a merry old bear

Little boy blue, come blow up your bear

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
26 weeks ago

North East Scotland, mostly

"What nursery rhyme teaches us about bear danger? It should probably be obvious but I can't think of a single one

Goldilocks. Although that teaches us the danger of eating porridge when it’s too hot

That's not a nursery rhyme though. It's a fairy tale.

(ok, maybe I am a pedant and the bears don't care for me)

I’m with you in your pedantry! This is the hill I shall die on.

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By *oiluvfunMan
26 weeks ago

Penrith

I just knew this was Essex Tom.....

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
26 weeks ago

Manchester-ish

"What nursery rhyme teaches us about bear danger? It should probably be obvious but I can't think of a single one

Goldilocks. Although that teaches us the danger of eating porridge when it’s too hot

That's not a nursery rhyme though. It's a fairy tale.

(ok, maybe I am a pedant and the bears don't care for me)

I’m with you in your pedantry! This is the hill I shall die on. "

Love you twinnie!

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By *ewSkiboo1892Man
26 weeks ago

Belfast

Bear attack? Or some dopey human thinking it's ok and safe to go into known bear territory, build a holiday home and then get mauled by a hungry fkn predator cos you've plonked yourself right in its back garden!!!

Same with people who dress up as a shark's favourite grub and go surfing. What the fuck did you think was gonna happen??!! Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
26 weeks ago

"I'm smarter than the average bear. "

Yes Boo-Boo, that's part of our downfall. Truth be known, we humans are the worst animals and the best thing we can do for the world is go extinct.

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan
26 weeks ago

St Leonards

"I'm smarter than the average bear.

Yes Boo-Boo, that's part of our downfall. Truth be known, we humans are the worst animals and the best thing we can do for the world is go extinct.

But...but...who else can divert the asteroids that might hurt all the cuddly cute ones?

That's our job.

We just have to get through the "horrible cunt" phase of evolution first.

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By *ris GrayMan
26 weeks ago

Dorchester

"I'm smarter than the average bear.

Yes Boo-Boo, that's part of our downfall. Truth be known, we humans are the worst animals and the best thing we can do for the world is go extinct.

But...but...who else can divert the asteroids that might hurt all the cuddly cute ones?

That's our job.

We just have to get through the "horrible cunt" phase of evolution first."
Evolution will snuff us out eventually

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By *929Man
26 weeks ago

newcastle

Don’t see why the bear had to be hunter and killed. What did the useless cunt expect leaving the door open?

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By *antastic_Mr_Fox_76Man
26 weeks ago

District 13

Us humans are just snacks to the majority of HUGE wild animals on land or at sea

plus in effect we’re invading their worlds so “keep the fucking door closed ffs”

Just to add I am glad no one died, and I’m glad a lesson can be learnt

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By *ssex_tom OP Man
26 weeks ago

Chelmsford

"Thanks Tom. I rolled my eyes so hard at your OP that it dislodged an eyelash that had been bothering me all day, so finally some good came from your continuing presence "

Praise from Caesar.. !

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By *ssex_tom OP Man
26 weeks ago

Chelmsford

"I just knew this was Essex Tom.....

What made you think that ?

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By *lan157Man
25 weeks ago

a village near Haywards Heath in East Sussex

"Hickory dickory dock, the bear ran up the clock?

Beary, beary, quite contrary?

Mary had a little bear?

This is a puzzle, Tom.

Mrs TMN x"

Mary had a little lamb , she she also had a bear.

I have often seen her little lamb,I have never seen her bare .

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By *ortySwitchMan
25 weeks ago

london

But, I thought bears were safer than men?

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By *a LunaWoman
25 weeks ago

South Wales

Have you seen how fast they can run. Faster than me for sure!

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By *batMan
25 weeks ago

Alicante, Spain. (Sometimes in Wales)

Is man not as entitled as any other animal to live in the forest?

All this talk of invasion. Humans have been around and sharing acreage with lots of creatures for millions of years.

It’s not all about the bear you know!

Gbat

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