FabSwingers.com forum: What is the worst thing you could say to a lift full of people

By *usman 199 OP Man
32 weeks ago

Stockport

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By *ohn.Wick.Man
32 weeks ago

The Continental

Can you hear that snapping sound?

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By *ohn.Wick.Man
32 weeks ago

The Continental

“ im sorry Shaun……………………….”

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By *ellhungvweMan
32 weeks ago

Cheltenham

Sorry but I had a really hot curry for lunch.

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By *andyandmickCouple
32 weeks ago

chilwell

Last time I was in here got stuck for 6 days

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By *ansoffateMan
32 weeks ago

Sagittarius A

I picked the wrong day to eat lentils.

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By *till gameMan
32 weeks ago

Oldham

“ is anyone else on the cabbage soup diet “

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By (user no longer on site)
32 weeks ago

What’s that smell.

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By *TG3Man
32 weeks ago

Dorchester

Going down rapidly

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By *icolasHidalgoDeCorazonMan
32 weeks ago

St Leonards

Allahu Akbar.

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By *till gameMan
32 weeks ago

Oldham

"Allahu Akbar."

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By *till gameMan
32 weeks ago

Oldham

"Allahu Akbar.

Does my bomb look big in this ?

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By *ansoffateMan
32 weeks ago

Sagittarius A

"“ is anyone else on the cabbage soup diet “"

Apologies I didn't mean to steal your thunder.

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By *ohn.Wick.Man
32 weeks ago

The Continental

“Pop quiz hotshot….”

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By *eeliciouschaosWoman
32 weeks ago

Wherever

“I want to play a game.”

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By *till gameMan
32 weeks ago

Oldham

"“ is anyone else on the cabbage soup diet “

Apologies I didn't mean to steal your thunder."

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By *ad NannaWoman
32 weeks ago

East London

During the war...

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By *elloWoman
32 weeks ago

alpha centauri

"You! You're first" as I start to undress myself

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By *avexxMan
32 weeks ago

cheshire

always seem to get a power cut this time of day

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By *till gameMan
32 weeks ago

Oldham

""You! You're first" as I start to undress myself

Hope you were looking at me

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By *avexxMan
32 weeks ago

cheshire

""You! You're first" as I start to undress myself

"
..

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By *naswingdressWoman
32 weeks ago

Manchester (she/her)

Oh god, I've got to change my Depends

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By *heelerMan
32 weeks ago

Northants

Room for a little one

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By *ohn.Wick.Man
32 weeks ago

The Continental

Oops that one felt a bit less gas, and a touch more liquid.

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By *oveToPlay.Couple
32 weeks ago

Yorkshire

Can I smell you

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By *elloWoman
32 weeks ago

alpha centauri

'Ground floor perfumery,

stationery and leather goods,

wigs and haberdashery

kitchenware and food...going up'

Only 1 other person would laugh and the rest of the lift would wonder what is wrong with these 2 old people , what are they talking about.

I'm old

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By (user no longer on site)
32 weeks ago

Did anyone watch the Towering Inferno last night

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By *cottish guy 555Man
32 weeks ago

London

"'Ground floor perfumery,

stationery and leather goods,

wigs and haberdashery

kitchenware and food...going up'

Only 1 other person would laugh and the rest of the lift would wonder what is wrong with these 2 old people , what are they talking about.

I'm old

I could hear the tills and the tune as I read it.

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By *eepBlueSeaMan
32 weeks ago

sandy place

[Removed by poster at 24/05/24 14:51:08]

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By *eepBlueSeaMan
32 weeks ago

sandy place

Nobody minds if I cut my toe nails do they?

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
32 weeks ago

The Town by The Cross

Hmmmmmm ........ the plaque says , 42 stone limit so even if you are alone it won't shift .

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By *till gameMan
32 weeks ago

Oldham

"'Ground floor perfumery,

stationery and leather goods,

wigs and haberdashery

kitchenware and food...going up'

Only 1 other person would laugh and the rest of the lift would wonder what is wrong with these 2 old people , what are they talking about.

I'm old

Especially if you asked if anyone had seen mrs slocomes pussy

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By *nitterWoman
32 weeks ago

the land of tall tales and yarn

I just burst into song when I'm in a lift, freaks most people out but I love the ones that join in

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
32 weeks ago

Leeds

Pull my finger.

The mr

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By *rucking-HellMan
32 weeks ago

Northampton

ALLAHU AKBAR!!!

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By *lexA68Man
32 weeks ago

Durham

Did you hear about Tower one?

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By *estman for the jobMan
32 weeks ago

Lincolnshire

Oh no I think I'm going to puke ??

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By *our TV fantasyTV/TS
32 weeks ago

Waterloo, Liverpool

I do this very occasionally. If you are stepping into a busy lift just don't turn back round to face the doors. Just stare at everyone else.

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
32 weeks ago

Reading

I never knew there would be so much blood in the man.

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By *cLovin2Man
32 weeks ago

Reading

I've been holding in this fart for the whole meeting for 3 hours, now I'm letting rip, oh god it feels like a tornado coming out, oh god!

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By *TG3Man
32 weeks ago

Dorchester

"I just burst into song when I'm in a lift, freaks most people out but I love the ones that join in"
i chat to people or ask them which floor they want

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By *ambertMan
32 weeks ago

Cheltenham

GO AWAY! `BAITIN

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By *ittlemissFlirtyCouple
32 weeks ago

Southampton

Start mentioning the tensile strengths of the cables holding it

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By *oozleMan
32 weeks ago

high wycombe

The last lift I was in, nobody survived!, want to help me make this my second

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By *ools and the brainCouple
32 weeks ago

couple, us we him her.

"guy's look I don't want to concern anyone but this little plaque says max load 4 person's or350kgs, there's ten of us in here and me and my mate weigh 110kgs each.

So unless you lot are alot lighter than you look we are fucked"

Twang!

"IM I THE ONLY ONE WHO HEARD THAT,HELLLLLPPPPPP WE ARE ALLL GOING TO DIE GET ME OUT,GET ME OUT........"

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By (user no longer on site)
32 weeks ago

It's true you do get to live out your death over and over .......

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By *rBobbMan
32 weeks ago

Birmingham

I wonder if that spare part they were waiting for turned up.

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By *2000ManMan
32 weeks ago

Worthing

[Removed by poster at 24/05/24 16:56:47]

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By *2000ManMan
32 weeks ago

Worthing

Hope it's not like the lift scene in Omen II.

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By *ools and the brainCouple
32 weeks ago

couple, us we him her.

How are we going up to the 13th floor?

This building only has 1 floor

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By *elloWoman
32 weeks ago

alpha centauri

As you lift doors close , SCREAM, and don't stop until the doors reopen,

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By (user no longer on site)
32 weeks ago

""You! You're first" as I start to undress myself

That is 100% not the worst thing you could say

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By *TG3Man
32 weeks ago

Dorchester

I have irritable bowl syndrome

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By *hatsWhatCoupleCouple
32 weeks ago

Northampton

Are you on Fab?

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By *coobyABCMan
32 weeks ago

Aberdeen

Egg sandwich anyone? Then open the tub

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By *aulhornyladMan
32 weeks ago

Sunderland

Allah akbah

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By *ools and the brainCouple
32 weeks ago

couple, us we him her.

I can't help thinking about Marvin the manic depressed Robot in hitchhiker's.

That's me in a lift.

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By *BWLOVER1965Man
32 weeks ago

My Own Little World

More do then say went to coarse in London coming back from Holborn some dirty git farted was absolutely disgusting pushed him and his backpack away from me and this woman absolutely horrific

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By *agatoXXXMan
32 weeks ago

Gone and completely forgotten.

"Who wants to pull my finger?"

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By *he Silver FuxMan
32 weeks ago

Uttoxeter

I had a visibly very pregnant colleague who was a great friend and in a crowded lift in a ‘loud’ whisper so that everyone could hear I said “when are you going to tell your husband it’s mine?”.

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By *he Silver FuxMan
32 weeks ago

Uttoxeter

"Allah akbah"

…Whilst wearing a rucksack and holding up a switch with wires running into your sleeve?

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By *andering Welsh GuyMan
32 weeks ago

All over the place

Oops I've followed through

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By *issYeuxBleusWoman
32 weeks ago

My boudoir - S Wales

*takes pants off*

“Right then, who’s going down?”

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By (user no longer on site)
32 weeks ago

“Can you spare some change please?”

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By *iaisonseekerMan
32 weeks ago

Liverpool

"Still waiting for my reinforced rubber underwear to arrive."

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By *oweliktrMan
32 weeks ago

Buckingham

-Cough-It’s not contagious I promise-cough cough

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By *ex HolesMan
32 weeks ago

Up North

Now I have a machine gun, ho ho ho

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By (user no longer on site)
32 weeks ago

“Sorry folks, this lift is out of order. Please use the stairs, sorry for the inconvenience, thanks for your cooperation”

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By (user no longer on site)
32 weeks ago

Anyyyyy seconnndddd nowwwww…

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By *ot to giggleWoman
32 weeks ago

Coventry

"'Ground floor perfumery,

stationery and leather goods,

wigs and haberdashery

kitchenware and food...going up'

Only 1 other person would laugh and the rest of the lift would wonder what is wrong with these 2 old people , what are they talking about.

I'm old

I could hear the tills and the tune as I read it.

^^^^^^^^^ hahaha same

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By (user no longer on site)
32 weeks ago

Sorry about that fart I always get nervous when I'm erect

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By *aygallaMan
32 weeks ago

newton aycliffe

Your floor or mine

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By *rispyDuckMan
32 weeks ago

Chinese Takeaway near you

My uncle Bin Laden once said ___

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

"Have you accepted our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ, into your life?"

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By *cLovin2Man
31 weeks ago

Reading

""Have you accepted our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ, into your life?""

No but I'm interested in the phone number of Maria Magdalena

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By *ympha LuxuriaWoman
31 weeks ago

La La Land

I think I'm going to be sick

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By *ohn.Wick.Man
31 weeks ago

The Continental

Jesus Bob……what button did you push?

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By *aizyWoman
31 weeks ago

west midlands

Hello

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

Fancy a bum?

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By *rBobbMan
31 weeks ago

Birmingham

"Jesus Bob……what button did you push? "

It wasn't me. I didn't push anything

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By *ohn.Wick.Man
31 weeks ago

The Continental

"Hello"

You win the internet today.

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By *partharmonyCouple
31 weeks ago

Ruislip

"I think you'll find that one was silent but deadly."

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By *ornLordMan
31 weeks ago

Wiltshire and London

""Have you accepted our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ, into your life?""

That stuff used to embarrass me even when I espoused some sort of faith...

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By *ingu and The ApeCouple
31 weeks ago

The Igloo

Anyone ever watch any of the Final destination films?

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By *TG3Man
31 weeks ago

Dorchester

[Removed by poster at 31/05/24 14:05:42]

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By *TG3Man
31 weeks ago

Dorchester

It wasn't me

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By *edbiker6Man
31 weeks ago

Scarborough

To cough then say don’t worry I don’t think it’s contagious

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By *aulhornyladMan
29 weeks ago

Sunderland

Alah akbar

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By *uckingFutzMan
29 weeks ago

Plymouth

Pardon me, I farted!

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By *hortishblondeWoman
29 weeks ago

Essex

Have you watched that film you know the one where they all die in the lift

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By *he turned me GreyCouple
29 weeks ago

Warwick and Coventry

We've got at least 10 mins of Air left..

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By *allandathleticMan
29 weeks ago

Asgard

I've lost my boomslang snake.

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By *rucking-HellMan
29 weeks ago

Northampton

"Who here is on Fab?"

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