FabSwingers.com forum: Quotes on Fab that make you laugh

By *r Analytic OP Man
34 weeks ago

Nuneaton

Right ladies , gents and they thems.

What quotes make you laugh on peoples bios and some how contradicts that quotes somewhere on their profile?

My entry is "I'm picky and I don't sleep my way through everybody on Fab"

They have been on Fab 5 months with 50 different meet reviwes.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
34 weeks ago

Leeds

Lick for hours.

Heavy cummer.

Professional so can't show pics.

Will fill in later (joined over a year ago)

Mrs

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By *ohn.Wick.Man
34 weeks ago

The Continental

“I’m sick of time wasters and fake, I’m fuckin leaving this place today”

Quoted 17weeks ago

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By *elloWoman
34 weeks ago

alpha centauri

Love to eat pussy for hours.

You are doing it wrong if you have to spend hours going down on a lady, she's probably a sleep by then

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By *r Analytic OP Man
34 weeks ago

Nuneaton

"Lick for hours.

Heavy cummer.

Professional so can't show pics.

Will fill in later (joined over a year ago)

Mrs "

100% them lot

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By *elloWoman
34 weeks ago

alpha centauri

Fill in later.

*Joined over a year ago

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By *r Analytic OP Man
34 weeks ago

Nuneaton

"“I’m sick of time wasters and fake, I’m fuckin leaving this place today”

Quoted 17weeks ago"

Seen this posted soooooooo many times

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By *ohn.Wick.Man
34 weeks ago

The Continental

"Love to eat pussy for hours.

You are doing it wrong if you have to spend hours going down on a lady, she's probably a sleep by then "

I have to do it for hours to make up for my D lasting 15 seconds.

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By *r Analytic OP Man
34 weeks ago

Nuneaton

"Fill in later.

*Joined over a year ago "

Still waiting for the update..........

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By *r Analytic OP Man
34 weeks ago

Nuneaton

"Love to eat pussy for hours.

You are doing it wrong if you have to spend hours going down on a lady, she's probably a sleep by then

I have to do it for hours to make up for my D lasting 15 seconds. "

Mr Wick I know a guy if you need help haha

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By (user no longer on site)
34 weeks ago

[Removed by poster at 07/05/24 17:42:51]

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By (user no longer on site)
34 weeks ago

On bio - 'We / I are only attracted to white people, just a preference.'

Then sends me a friend request..

-They must have some sort of colour chart on their wall.

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By *till gameMan
34 weeks ago

Oldham

No one over 30 contact me !

Age preference 18-99

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By *arry monk40Man
34 weeks ago

Telford

Location somewhere far away,startecking across the universe hogwarts blah blah I can see your in essex

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By *heekyFlirtyCoupleCouple
34 weeks ago

Stockport

Send a face pic with your 1st message

From a profile with no pics or info on it

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By *r Analytic OP Man
34 weeks ago

Nuneaton

"On bio - 'We / I are only attracted to white people, just a preference.'

Then sends me a friend request..

-They must have some sort of colour chart on their wall."

Wow thats bad

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By *elloWoman
34 weeks ago

alpha centauri

"Location somewhere far away,startecking across the universe hogwarts blah blah I can see your in essex"

Yeah I hate people who list their location as off world

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By *r Analytic OP Man
34 weeks ago

Nuneaton

"Send a face pic with your 1st message

From a profile with no pics or info on it "

This one really does make me think cat fish

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By *uckurcumMan
34 weeks ago

Bishop Auckland

Can't keep away ......

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By *r Analytic OP Man
34 weeks ago

Nuneaton

"Location somewhere far away,startecking across the universe hogwarts blah blah I can see your in essex

Yeah I hate people who list their location as off world

What about planet pleasure?

And yes i have seen this on a profile

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By *ot to giggleWoman
34 weeks ago

Coventry

Straight and all veri are tv or guys

Sends friend request and they have no pics

Cant send face pic but request one

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By (user no longer on site)
34 weeks ago

"On bio - 'We / I are only attracted to white people, just a preference.'

Then sends me a friend request..

-They must have some sort of colour chart on their wall.

Wow thats bad"

I've learned to have humour about people that can undermine their own biases.

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By *uckurcumMan
34 weeks ago

Bishop Auckland

Another gem is 'Cant accommodate ' 'Cant Travel'

That'll be another success story on here

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By *r Analytic OP Man
34 weeks ago

Nuneaton

"Straight and all veri are tv or guys

Sends friend request and they have no pics

Cant send face pic but request one"

Maybe they are in denial or confused about their sexuality

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By *r Analytic OP Man
34 weeks ago

Nuneaton

"On bio - 'We / I are only attracted to white people, just a preference.'

Then sends me a friend request..

-They must have some sort of colour chart on their wall.

Wow thats bad

I've learned to have humour about people that can undermine their own biases."

And none smoker but meet for a coffee

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By *uckurcumMan
34 weeks ago

Bishop Auckland

Not interested in single men ...

Yet they message wanting either a meet or cam wank ...

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By *r Analytic OP Man
34 weeks ago

Nuneaton

What i ment to say "wont meet smoker" then meets a smoker.

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By (user no longer on site)
34 weeks ago

I'm classy...

Followed by 20 badly taken flaps akimbo pics...

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By *rowneyedgirl.Woman
34 weeks ago

Durham

Well... My sister's boyfriend messaged me on here .(Obviously didn't know it was me!)

He is a real sleazy slimball. With turkey teeth never worked an honest day in his life.

His tag line was "class only" which made me laugh knowing he has given my sister a few unwelcome genital visitors.

He messaged saying that he had altered his DNA to make cum for a minute

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By *heelerMan
34 weeks ago

Northants

"Love to eat pussy for hours.

You are doing it wrong if you have to spend hours going down on a lady, she's probably a sleep by then "

So would i be

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By *ed VoluptaWoman
34 weeks ago

Wirral.

Not my first rodeo, know how it works

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By (user no longer on site)
34 weeks ago

Fill in later.

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By *r Analytic OP Man
34 weeks ago

Nuneaton

"Well... My sister's boyfriend messaged me on here .(Obviously didn't know it was me!)

He is a real sleazy slimball. With turkey teeth never worked an honest day in his life.

His tag line was "class only" which made me laugh knowing he has given my sister a few unwelcome genital visitors.

He messaged saying that he had altered his DNA to make cum for a minute "

Ok im one for fab life stays on fab. But that is one dumb ass. I hope there was alittle conversation about this with you sister or maybe alittle torment in person first before you spoken to your sister.

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By *r Analytic OP Man
34 weeks ago

Nuneaton

"Not my first rodeo, know how it works

Hummm i was under the impression this is a swing site not a horse rodeo site.

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By *ed VoluptaWoman
34 weeks ago

Wirral.

"Not my first rodeo, know how it works

Hummm i was under the impression this is a swing site not a horse rodeo site."

I corrected the spelling as "know" is usually spelled as "no"

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By (user no longer on site)
34 weeks ago

Oh ...and "genuine"...

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By (user no longer on site)
34 weeks ago

Ask me

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
34 weeks ago

Central

All here for the same thing

/reason

Psychic abilities proven, they know all of our desires

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By *r Analytic OP Man
34 weeks ago

Nuneaton

"Not my first rodeo, know how it works

Hummm i was under the impression this is a swing site not a horse rodeo site.

I corrected the spelling as "know" is usually spelled as "no"

Spelling is key you know that. On the Naughty step you go for 10 minutes. As you changed the spelling of the quote used.

If that was the case i would be spending days at a time for my poor spelling.

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By (user no longer on site)
34 weeks ago

Very open minded, up for anything.

Couple of messages in and they are not up for anything.

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By *rowneyedgirl.Woman
34 weeks ago

Durham

Well I did the moral thing and let my sister know, but it ment having to tell my family about why I'm on here!

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By *elloWoman
34 weeks ago

alpha centauri

"Not my first rodeo, know how it works

Hummm i was under the impression this is a swing site not a horse rodeo site."

We all enjoy a rigourous ride on this site

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By *r Analytic OP Man
34 weeks ago

Nuneaton

"Well I did the moral thing and let my sister know, but it ment having to tell my family about why I'm on here! "

You see you could of said I have a mate who sent me this. Or just talk to your sister about it and say don't tell the family. But i hope they dont judge you for it.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
34 weeks ago

Leeds

Honest, decent, genuine & respectful.

If you have to say it I'll assume you're not.

Mrs

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
34 weeks ago

The Town by The Cross

Missus doesn't want sex

Missus doesn't want to join here

Help me persuade my missus

My missus doesn't want anal how can I get her to let me.

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By *TG3Man
34 weeks ago

Dorchester

"Right ladies , gents and they thems.

What quotes make you laugh on peoples bios and some how contradicts that quotes somewhere on their profile?

My entry is "I'm picky and I don't sleep my way through everybody on Fab"

They have been on Fab 5 months with 50 different meet reviwes.

"
Probably from social meets though

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By *r Analytic OP Man
34 weeks ago

Nuneaton

"Right ladies , gents and they thems.

What quotes make you laugh on peoples bios and some how contradicts that quotes somewhere on their profile?

My entry is "I'm picky and I don't sleep my way through everybody on Fab"

They have been on Fab 5 months with 50 different meet reviwes.

Probably from social meets though

Not when you read them (not in all cases)

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By *ortyairCouple
34 weeks ago

Wallasey

Can't show face pics... maybe on here but can't wait to show you on Whattsapp, Telegram, Kik etc.

So do these sites have a feature you can't misuse face pics sent by them.

Jog on,

Mrs x

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By *rowneyedgirl.Woman
34 weeks ago

Durham

"Well I did the moral thing and let my sister know, but it ment having to tell my family about why I'm on here!

You see you could of said I have a mate who sent me this. Or just talk to your sister about it and say don't tell the family. But i hope they dont judge you for it."

My sister would ask too many questions I'd end up tying myself up in lies.

They don't really understand my situation and my brother put ME in hospital over it.

But at least I can hold my head up and say I was honest. (As lucky for me my husband knows I was on here)

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By *r Analytic OP Man
34 weeks ago

Nuneaton

"Well I did the moral thing and let my sister know, but it ment having to tell my family about why I'm on here!

You see you could of said I have a mate who sent me this. Or just talk to your sister about it and say don't tell the family. But i hope they dont judge you for it.

My sister would ask too many questions I'd end up tying myself up in lies.

They don't really understand my situation and my brother put ME in hospital over it.

But at least I can hold my head up and say I was honest. (As lucky for me my husband knows I was on here)"

That is very sad to hear

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By *till gameMan
34 weeks ago

Oldham

"Not my first rodeo, know how it works

Hummm i was under the impression this is a swing site not a horse rodeo site.

We all enjoy a rigourous ride on this site

I hope you don’t mean the bestiality kind

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By *rowneyedgirl.Woman
34 weeks ago

Durham

"Well I did the moral thing and let my sister know, but it ment having to tell my family about why I'm on here!

You see you could of said I have a mate who sent me this. Or just talk to your sister about it and say don't tell the family. But i hope they dont judge you for it.

My sister would ask too many questions I'd end up tying myself up in lies.

They don't really understand my situation and my brother put ME in hospital over it.

But at least I can hold my head up and say I was honest. (As lucky for me my husband knows I was on here)

That is very sad to hear

I'm okay though.

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By *r Analytic OP Man
34 weeks ago

Nuneaton

"Well I did the moral thing and let my sister know, but it ment having to tell my family about why I'm on here!

You see you could of said I have a mate who sent me this. Or just talk to your sister about it and say don't tell the family. But i hope they dont judge you for it.

My sister would ask too many questions I'd end up tying myself up in lies.

They don't really understand my situation and my brother put ME in hospital over it.

But at least I can hold my head up and say I was honest. (As lucky for me my husband knows I was on here)

That is very sad to hear

I'm okay though. "

Glad to hear it keep being you

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By *rowneyedgirl.Woman
34 weeks ago

Durham

"Well I did the moral thing and let my sister know, but it ment having to tell my family about why I'm on here!

You see you could of said I have a mate who sent me this. Or just talk to your sister about it and say don't tell the family. But i hope they dont judge you for it.

My sister would ask too many questions I'd end up tying myself up in lies.

They don't really understand my situation and my brother put ME in hospital over it.

But at least I can hold my head up and say I was honest. (As lucky for me my husband knows I was on here)

That is very sad to hear

I'm okay though.

Glad to hear it keep being you

But still it makes me laugh..."I've changed my DNA"

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By (user no longer on site)
34 weeks ago

Straight

Veris from dudes

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By *till gameMan
34 weeks ago

Oldham

On pics it says fab for a fuck

You see it’s been fabbed 400 times in the last week, am thinking wow her minge is going to be massacred

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By *glyBettyTV/TS
34 weeks ago

About 3 feet away from the fence

"rugby build"

Is overweight & clearly hasn't played competitive sport for several years at least

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By *offiaCoolWoman
34 weeks ago

Kidsgrove

Back again, can't stay away. Know how this site works, ask away. Had verifications on my old profile, if you recognise me get in touch....no photos.....

How, just how would someone recognise them

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By *exxyyDy11Man
34 weeks ago

Darwen

"Send a face pic with your 1st message

From a profile with no pics or info on it "

Oh that pisses me off. I used to do that and then you get no reply. I don't bother doing it with accounts that have no pics

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By *irty_little_blondeWoman
34 weeks ago

Manchester

All these are belters

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By *ittlebirdWoman
34 weeks ago

The Big Smoke

No dick pics… their profile pic is either a gaping foof or gaping asshole

I chuckle at these… and all the others above

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By *aulupforitMan
34 weeks ago

Corbridge

Professional,discrete & The best until the next one comes along lol

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By *inister_SpinsterWoman
34 weeks ago

Manchester(ish).

The bullshit legal threats and disclaimers that people insist on putting in the profiles.

Because I'm a curious nerd, I've done some investigation.

The Uniform Commercial Code (UCC) does exist but is only applicable in the USA. However the numbers of the codes in the standard text, below, don't exist.

UCC 1-103 1-308.

I've now taken to asking fabbers why they use this, purely to be a cantankerous twat.

I think the op asked what made you laugh. It amuses me, but I think I've probably bored everyone else to death.

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By *emonbuttercreamWoman
34 weeks ago

Birmingham

Live, Laugh, Anal.

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By *quirrel!Man
34 weeks ago

Nearby

[Removed by poster at 07/05/24 21:47:12]

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By *quirrel!Man
34 weeks ago

Nearby

Just saw this: “Crashed my car this morning, ache and need a rub down”

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By *rsMistyPeaksWoman
34 weeks ago

Essex

"On pics it says fab for a fuck

You see it’s been fabbed 400 times in the last week, am thinking wow her minge is going to be massacred

That made me really laugh

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By *ebauchedDeviantsPt2Couple
34 weeks ago

Cumbria

“I’m really bi I just don’t want to put people off”

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By *bwqueen74Couple
34 weeks ago

sunderland

what colour knickers u got on !

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By *quirrel!Man
34 weeks ago

Nearby

Not looking

(Just maintaining the peep!)

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By *rpeggioCouple
34 weeks ago

Baughurst

"We are a couple very much in love and not here looking to replace each other".

We can now sigh with relief that this mediocre couple is not trying to break up our marriage and we become an episode of the Wife Swap franchise.

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By *till gameMan
34 weeks ago

Oldham

"On pics it says fab for a fuck

You see it’s been fabbed 400 times in the last week, am thinking wow her minge is going to be massacred

That made me really laugh

I aim to please

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By *allipygousMan
34 weeks ago

Leicester

Anything that describes the woman of a couple as a "hot wife" and they're presumably referring to her internal thermometer.

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By *r Analytic OP Man
34 weeks ago

Nuneaton

"Anything that describes the woman of a couple as a "hot wife" and they're presumably referring to her internal thermometer."

Haha yes 100% hot wife but the camera must of been pointing at another woman who isn't ( sorry not all hot wifes are hot)

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By *uri00620Woman
34 weeks ago

Croydon

Not a specific quote but when full grown adults beg for fabs on forums/profiles, particularly if they're looking to get into the hottest photos lists.

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By (user no longer on site)
34 weeks ago

Sends photo or has photo but no verification

Irks me massively but fabswingers say no one has to be photo verified

Photos over 10 years old but reused 2024

Professional and genuine cannot show you face but full of hairy cock pics

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By (user no longer on site)
34 weeks ago

"Not a specific quote but when full grown adults beg for fabs on forums/profiles, particularly if they're looking to get into the hottest photos lists.

They do that in a thread begging for fabs or hotlist

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By *ommo87Man
34 weeks ago

Croydon

Just have to put it out there. You are absolutely gorgeous x

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By (user no longer on site)
34 weeks ago

Statuses moaning about being filtered as not my type and said no thank you

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By (user no longer on site)
34 weeks ago

"Just have to put it out there. You are absolutely gorgeous x"

How you know I am

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By (user no longer on site)
34 weeks ago

"Right ladies , gents and they thems.

What quotes make you laugh on peoples bios and some how contradicts that quotes somewhere on their profile?

My entry is "I'm picky and I don't sleep my way through everybody on Fab"

They have been on Fab 5 months with 50 different meet reviwes.

Loads here use 'picky' but puts out meet request 'meet anyone'

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By *ags73Man
34 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"Not a specific quote but when full grown adults beg for fabs on forums/profiles, particularly if they're looking to get into the hottest photos lists.

I’m bad for wanting lady fabs on ‘fab a fella fursday’ but 2 or 3 and I’m like muttley getting a medal

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By *ucka39Man
34 weeks ago

Newcastle

Been on before yet 6 months later blank bio

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By *rucking-HellMan
34 weeks ago

Northampton

"I don't consent to dick pics" always makes me chuckle on a site like this.

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By *ucka39Man
34 weeks ago

Newcastle

Not my first rodeo

Will fill in properly later and a year later (same)

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By *ensualplay69Man
34 weeks ago

slough

I don't know if this counts but when a couple say " we chose who we play with " no matter how much times I see it I unconsciously say "duh"

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By *orksRockerMan
34 weeks ago

Bradford

"I'll be respectful" as if it's something they will add rather than it being there already. That does make me laugh.

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By *ivemealadybonerWoman
34 weeks ago

somewhere

"non smoker" yet turns up stinking of Benson and hedges

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By *issmorganWoman
34 weeks ago

Calderdale innit

If you remember me, get in touch-from a blank profile with one like of text and no pics.

Been here before, know how it works-I didn't like how it worked so I deleted my profile in a strop one day.

Great meet thanks, you know who you are, no veries at all.

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By *ex HolesMan
34 weeks ago

Up North

Send a face pic or I’ll block

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By *ACOLCouple
34 weeks ago

limerick

Here for a good time not a long time

Lina.

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By *lowupdollTV/TS
34 weeks ago

Herts/Beds/Lomdon

""non smoker" yet turns up stinking of Benson and hedges

Maybe they only smoke in privet

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By *TG3Man
34 weeks ago

Dorchester

""I don't consent to dick pics" always makes me chuckle on a site like this. "
on a site like what? Why would you send a dick pic to someone you don't know and haven't chatted to?

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By *endalshaggersCouple
34 weeks ago

Kendal

"Will only meet an exceptional male" - like most people, what do you class as exceptional.

"No face picture, no chat" - from a profile with no profile pictures or pictures at all on it.

"We've been here before know how it works" - cool story, do you want a medal?

"Won't sleep with anyone" - only been on the site a few weeks and has a lot of verifications which prove opposite.

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By *tsJustKateWoman
34 weeks ago

London

1.Professional - At what?

2.Heavy/Repeat Cummer - They never are!

3.I dont bite, unless you want me to - Really?

4. I'm straight - Yeah right!

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By *illybeachboyMan
34 weeks ago

Guernsey

Bi curious and has 37 verifications from men always makes me laugh.

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By (user no longer on site)
34 weeks ago

"Must have good hygiene" ... should be a given

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By *rBobbMan
34 weeks ago

Birmingham

"Need a site supporters pass"

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By *osey WalesMan
34 weeks ago

Surrey

On verifications..

1) Treat her with respect - Der, goes without needing to be said.

2) Dont let her pass you by. - Not always my choice !

3) Mess with her and you'll have me too answer too. - Oh Please...

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By *osey WalesMan
34 weeks ago

Surrey

""Need a site supporters pass""

Yes this and the fab me to fuck me pics.

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By (user no longer on site)
34 weeks ago

"Love to eat pussy for hours.

You are doing it wrong if you have to spend hours going down on a lady, she's probably a sleep by then "

No one wants to be licked for hours like a thirsty camel

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By *TG3Man
34 weeks ago

Dorchester

How pretty is my penis

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By (user no longer on site)
34 weeks ago

I'm single ....

But I can't accomodate ... and can only meet daytimes when the wife's at work

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By (user no longer on site)
34 weeks ago

"Well I did the moral thing and let my sister know, but it ment having to tell my family about why I'm on here!

You see you could of said I have a mate who sent me this. Or just talk to your sister about it and say don't tell the family. But i hope they dont judge you for it.

My sister would ask too many questions I'd end up tying myself up in lies.

They don't really understand my situation and my brother put ME in hospital over it.

But at least I can hold my head up and say I was honest. (As lucky for me my husband knows I was on here)"

Wow hope you are ok xx you did the right thing telling your sister x

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By *rpeggioCouple
34 weeks ago

Baughurst

"We take good care of ourselves, keep fit and always smell amazing, so we expect the same from you"

Are we supposed to send you across our gym routines to prove it and armpit swabs to see that you like how we smell?

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By *endalshaggersCouple
33 weeks ago

Kendal

"We don't meet men"

But their public photos show recent pictures/videos of the lady having fun labelled "not my hubby/partner/other half". And their recent verifications all come from male accounts....

Just something I find very amusing.

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By *abluesbabyMan
33 weeks ago

Gibraltar/Cheshire/London

Male profiles who go to great lengths to state they are "single" in their bio often answer "See the missus getting fucked" when asked their hottest fantasy in the forums!

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By *ark73XXXMan
33 weeks ago

North Staffs/South Cheshire

""Need a site supporters pass""

What the hell is a site supporters pass? What does it look like?

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By *ittlemissFlirtyCouple
33 weeks ago

Southampton

"On verifications..

1) Treat her with respect - Der, goes without needing to be said.

2) Dont let her pass you by. - Not always my choice !

3) Mess with her and you'll have me too answer too. - Oh Please...

Oh god I think I've had all 3

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By *ost SockMan
33 weeks ago

West Wales and Cardiff

About 12 years ago, I first saw the legendary phrase “cock snot up the fart pipe” in a forum post on here.

It still makes me laugh to this day

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By *ambertMan
33 weeks ago

Cheltenham

"I'm genuine and nice"

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By (user no longer on site)
33 weeks ago

“Must have face pics” or similar on a profile with little to no pictures. Like why the double standards?

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By *agatoXXXMan
33 weeks ago

Gone and completely forgotten.

Joined this morning- "Don't message unless you have verifications". Has no verificationsof their own.

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By *nnCeeWoman
33 weeks ago

East of Eden, West of Hell

"Bi curious and has 37 verifications from men always makes me laugh. "

"Straight", but verifications from men, also looking for TV/TS.

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