FabSwingers.com forum: Hi how are you ? Whys this so offending

By *awtee OP Man
29 weeks ago

Solihull

So ive seen a number of complaints about starting a message with Hi how are you.

How are people starting off without some kind of polite _ello

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ascaIMan
29 weeks ago

Cheshire Liverpool Manchester

I don’t think it’s that it’s offensive. It’s probably just more refreshing to see something else in the inbox to respond to. Saying how you are all day would get old fast.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *EAT..85Woman
29 weeks ago

Nottingham

That's all that 95% of messages say.

If you got 100 messages a day and 95 of them said hi how are you? How fucking bored and uninspired world you be? Would you respond to them all? EVERY day... 95 hi how are you messages...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *naswingdressWoman
29 weeks ago

Manchester (she/her)

It's not offensive, it's boring.

Starting with it is fine - as long as there's more in the first message.

When I let messages in, I want to see more than something that is copy-pasted to the rest of the site.

What's offensive to me is that people don't know the difference between offensive and disliked/ unwelcome, but that's a whole other story.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
29 weeks ago

[Removed by poster at 26/04/24 13:07:52]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
29 weeks ago

It's all about the hot giant cock videos these days, OP.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ommander_StraxMan
29 weeks ago

Telford

Because I’m shit _awtee, that’s how “I” am feeling. Shit.

The weathers rubbish, I’m knackered from work, and I had to cancel tonight’s club plans. Imagine how moist the ladies get at THAT reply.

But in all seriousness, it’s because on its own it’s a bloody awful message and just boring. Plus 90% of the time when I’ve had this message, it’s either had incorrect spelling or grammar… which, when you think it’s only a few letters… is impressive.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
29 weeks ago

"That's all that 95% of messages say.

If you got 100 messages a day and 95 of them said hi how are you? How fucking bored and uninspired world you be? Would you respond to them all? EVERY day... 95 hi how are you messages... "

Chance would be a fine thing!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
29 weeks ago

Its dull and lacks Imagination or a demonstration that the sender has read my profile.

So it's always. Thanks but no thanks from me.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
29 weeks ago

That wouldn’t offend but someone sending a message saying “hi” or “hey” that’s an instant block. Can’t abide laziness.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *EAT..85Woman
29 weeks ago

Nottingham

"That's all that 95% of messages say.

If you got 100 messages a day and 95 of them said hi how are you? How fucking bored and uninspired world you be? Would you respond to them all? EVERY day... 95 hi how are you messages...

Chance would be a fine thing!

You get your fair share! How many conversations and shagging sessions can you actually realistically fit in?! Less than me that's for sure!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *glyBettyTV/TS
29 weeks ago

About 3 feet away from the fence

Because it's so generic & uninspired you're inclined to think that it's coming from an AI driven account.

If it is a real person, then it's an indication that the conversation will be moving at a glacial pace at best & I lose interest.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
29 weeks ago

"That's all that 95% of messages say.

If you got 100 messages a day and 95 of them said hi how are you? How fucking bored and uninspired world you be? Would you respond to them all? EVERY day... 95 hi how are you messages... "

Yeah imagine the responses

* great thanks *

Then it would be *wuu2 *

*not much, just browsing fab*

Then *when can we meet*

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *esthetic21Man
29 weeks ago

Birmingham/Bristol

It's because alot of people on here are so far up their own arse they think strangers owe them something like a really long well thought out message and if they don't then f off. Yea absolute cunts f them I'd never even beg a profile that said some shit like don't send a message saying hi. It's totally normal to say to someone to get their attention

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *naswingdressWoman
29 weeks ago

Manchester (she/her)

"That's all that 95% of messages say.

If you got 100 messages a day and 95 of them said hi how are you? How fucking bored and uninspired world you be? Would you respond to them all? EVERY day... 95 hi how are you messages...

Yeah imagine the responses

* great thanks *

Then it would be *wuu2 *

*not much, just browsing fab*

Then *when can we meet*

u haz pussy. I haz kok. purrfect match

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
29 weeks ago

"That's all that 95% of messages say.

If you got 100 messages a day and 95 of them said hi how are you? How fucking bored and uninspired world you be? Would you respond to them all? EVERY day... 95 hi how are you messages...

Yeah imagine the responses

* great thanks *

Then it would be *wuu2 *

*not much, just browsing fab*

Then *when can we meet*

u haz pussy. I haz kok. purrfect match"

Meet now

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ascaIMan
29 weeks ago

Cheshire Liverpool Manchester

"Yeah imagine the responses

* great thanks *

Then it would be *wuu2 *

*not much, just browsing fab*

Then *when can we meet*

Takes me back to my high school days chatting on MSN. If you take Fab out the situation

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *naswingdressWoman
29 weeks ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Yeah imagine the responses

* great thanks *

Then it would be *wuu2 *

*not much, just browsing fab*

Then *when can we meet*

Takes me back to my high school days chatting on MSN. If you take Fab out the situation

the cool kids were on ICQ

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *antastic_Mr_Fox_76Man
29 weeks ago

District 13

It’s much preferred to send pics of generals whether dicks, these have numerous names, or gaping gashes, these too have numerous names, followed with vulgar messages

However I can not guarantee any success meeting your preferred species with these actions

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ascaIMan
29 weeks ago

Cheshire Liverpool Manchester

"Yeah imagine the responses

* great thanks *

Then it would be *wuu2 *

*not much, just browsing fab*

Then *when can we meet*

Takes me back to my high school days chatting on MSN. If you take Fab out the situation

the cool kids were on ICQ"

I’m questioning just how uncool I was now

I don’t even know what that is.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iscean_dreamMan
29 weeks ago

Llanelli

Try mixing it up a bit, something like "have you ever been naked on a horse in a beautiful meadow and fallen off into a cowpat"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
29 weeks ago

Far too common, we expect at least some thespian dication in first messages to us.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *allipygousMan
29 weeks ago

Leicester

"It's because alot of people on here are so far up their own arse they think strangers owe them something like a really long well thought out message and if they don't then f off. Yea absolute cunts f them I'd never even beg a profile that said some shit like don't send a message saying hi. It's totally normal to say to someone to get their attention"

A good point well made. If the profile was to their liking a "Hi, how are you?" only message would be sufficient to get the ball rolling methinks.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *EAT..85Woman
29 weeks ago

Nottingham

"Try mixing it up a bit, something like "have you ever been naked on a horse in a beautiful meadow and fallen off into a cowpat""

This is the way...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ris GrayMan
29 weeks ago

Dorchester

"So ive seen a number of complaints about starting a message with Hi how are you.

How are people starting off without some kind of polite _ello"
Its just doesn't show any personality for an opening message, remember couples and women get lots of messages and repitition tends to get ignored

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *amantha_JadeWoman
29 weeks ago

Newcastle

There’s nothing wrong with ‘Hi, how are you?’ if it’s followed up with additional comments, but on its own it’s boring, it’s generic and it could have been one of a hundred messages that has been already copied and pasted.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *EAT..85Woman
29 weeks ago

Nottingham

A good point well made. If the profile was to their liking a "Hi, how are you?" only message would be sufficient to get the ball rolling methinks."

Methinks you don't get 100 hi how are you messages a day to bore you to tears

It helps filter people out though

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *esthetic21Man
29 weeks ago

Birmingham/Bristol

A good point well made. If the profile was to their liking a "Hi, how are you?" only message would be sufficient to get the ball rolling methinks."
exactly then they can have a gander at your profile and message you back or block you lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *naswingdressWoman
29 weeks ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Yeah imagine the responses

* great thanks *

Then it would be *wuu2 *

*not much, just browsing fab*

Then *when can we meet*

Takes me back to my high school days chatting on MSN. If you take Fab out the situation

the cool kids were on ICQ

I’m questioning just how uncool I was now

I don’t even know what that is. "

I wasn't on it, don't worry

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ellinever70Woman
29 weeks ago

Ayrshire

I think it's a perfect reasonable message.

If their profile appealed, I'm okay with trying to get some conversation going

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eroLondonMan
29 weeks ago

Mayfair

"....How are people starting off without some kind of polite _ello"

•

You say "Salutations, dear lady, and a warm and congenial afternoon to your goodself. May I enquire how you are?"

Followed by "...{redacted} Nero's intellectual property on introductions© ® ™ withheld {redacted}...".

Alternatively, don't message women. They will message you in due course.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *olly_chromaticTV/TS
29 weeks ago

Stockport

It's because alot of people on here are so far up their own arse they think strangers owe them a reply to a message that they've put zero effort into constructing, and if they don't, get twattish about it. Yea absolute cunts f them I'd never even beg a profile that did some shit like sending a message just saying hi then getting angry at being ignored. It's totally normal to open a face-to-face conversation with a polite "_ello" to get their attention, but if you received a written letter from an unknown person that just said "hi", all you would do is chuck it in the bin...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
29 weeks ago

Hi, how are you is fine as a first message.

I check out the profile and if it looks interesting, I’ll reply.

Is it a little boring and repetitive, yes, but if the conversation flows easily after that, I have no issues.

Sometimes profiles don’t give a great deal to go on when reaching out and trying to come up with something interesting to get the ball rolling doesn’t always work.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *issmorganWoman
29 weeks ago

Calderdale innit

It's not offensive and if the sender has a decent profile, I'd take time to reply.

Hi, how's u, from a blank profile means I delete, as its boring on both counts.

So it's not always what's said that's important, it's the overall profile and message.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
29 weeks ago

It's not offensive, just dry. And usually follows up with I'm goof thanks, you free today to jump on this strangers willy.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ools and the brainCouple
29 weeks ago

couple, us we him her.

It's too familiar.

If you know someone and you ask them that's fine because there's history.

However as an introduction it's lazy and boring,it tells us nothing about you and your personality other than you can't be bothered to make any effort.

Pretty simple really.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *allipygousMan
29 weeks ago

Leicester

A good point well made. If the profile was to their liking a "Hi, how are you?" only message would be sufficient to get the ball rolling methinks.

Methinks you don't get 100 hi how are you messages a day to bore you to tears

It helps filter people out though

If I did I'd simply look at the profile and if it piqued my interest I'd respond. I wouldn't delete without looking at the profile.

C'mon, be honest. Have you ever had a well thought out initial message, looked at the profile and thought "Naaaaah" and just deleted it?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *EAT..85Woman
29 weeks ago

Nottingham

A good point well made. If the profile was to their liking a "Hi, how are you?" only message would be sufficient to get the ball rolling methinks.

Methinks you don't get 100 hi how are you messages a day to bore you to tears

It helps filter people out though

If I did I'd simply look at the profile and if it piqued my interest I'd respond. I wouldn't delete without looking at the profile.

C'mon, be honest. Have you ever had a well thought out initial message, looked at the profile and thought "Naaaaah" and just deleted it?"

To be sure I have. I rarely have my message settings open, but they have been today and I've responded to zero new people that didn't come off the back of another forum post. I've had a couple of well thought out messages that I've deleted amongst the dross too.

The main issue is, if I respond saying no thank you (which I used to do when green on here) it means that when I lock down my message settings again, they can still message me as I have previously responded to and unlocked the gate so to speak.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
29 weeks ago

Me love you long time. Me so HORNY.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
29 weeks ago

Leeds

I'm fine, I'm always fine, it's a tedious conversation.

Mrs

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *weetiepie99Woman
29 weeks ago

cardiff

Nothing wrong with it at all as a starting message.

If there is interest on both sides, the conversation can flow from there.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *BWLOVER1965Man
29 weeks ago

My Own Little World

To be fair try to put a bit thought in to a first message if I message first and read there profile

If don’t get message back then normally means no don’t persist

Have made few good friends on hear lovely women sometimes just want a chat and nothing sexual

Fab is fab nothing changes except the names

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
29 weeks ago

Only so many times i can reply im fine thanks you? Before i reply absolutely peed off and bored out my mind how are u?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *naswingdressWoman
29 weeks ago

Manchester (she/her)

A good point well made. If the profile was to their liking a "Hi, how are you?" only message would be sufficient to get the ball rolling methinks.

Methinks you don't get 100 hi how are you messages a day to bore you to tears

It helps filter people out though

If I did I'd simply look at the profile and if it piqued my interest I'd respond. I wouldn't delete without looking at the profile.

C'mon, be honest. Have you ever had a well thought out initial message, looked at the profile and thought "Naaaaah" and just deleted it?

Exactly.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ondiego85Man
29 weeks ago

nottingham

I guess it’s simple because it’s boring and unimaginative. And a woman that gets hundreds of messages probably want something a bit more interesting.

When I took the time and put the effort to write a good and thoughtful message, I received replies. Not all of them led to meets, mind

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *mber and FireCouple
29 weeks ago

Carmarthenshire

We're so totally up our own arses that all we want is a break from the mundane conversations we have at work. Every. Single. Day.

How dare we expect a little bit of thought and effort showing they acknowledge us as actual people, and not just something to fuck.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *allipygousMan
29 weeks ago

Leicester

A good point well made. If the profile was to their liking a "Hi, how are you?" only message would be sufficient to get the ball rolling methinks.

Methinks you don't get 100 hi how are you messages a day to bore you to tears

It helps filter people out though

If I did I'd simply look at the profile and if it piqued my interest I'd respond. I wouldn't delete without looking at the profile.

C'mon, be honest. Have you ever had a well thought out initial message, looked at the profile and thought "Naaaaah" and just deleted it?

I thought what was being discussed on this thread was folk sending "Hi, how are you?" initial messages, which I was defending. You don't have to say thanks but no thanks, just go ahead and delete I'd you're not interested, which the now veteran you is doing

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uliette500Woman
29 weeks ago

Hull

It's fine if that's how you start a message it's when that's the only thing the message says that it's the problem.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *enisorousMan
29 weeks ago

sunderland

How about "hi,i like your titties,can i fuck your fanny " or is that no good either ?..haha

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *antastic_Mr_Fox_76Man
29 weeks ago

District 13

[Removed by poster at 26/04/24 14:39:03]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *antastic_Mr_Fox_76Man
29 weeks ago

District 13

Why not send whatever intro and message you like to who ever you like and fuck it

Delete sent message and if you get a response great but if you don’t again fuck it

It’s all bolocks anyway

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *glyBettyTV/TS
29 weeks ago

About 3 feet away from the fence

The message system is a written-word communication medium. It's specifically designed for longer, more verbose exchanges with other users.

Nobody is going to have sustainable interest in conducting a conversation 3-4 words at a time, when you have the option of writing many more words, without it becoming tedious very very quickly.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
29 weeks ago

It's not offensive, just not to everyone's tastes, given how they approach fab.

Those that are on your level & into you, will appreciate it/reply. Those that aren't, won't.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
29 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

It's not offensive.

It's just tedious when there's 83 messages of just that and nothing else sat in the inbox to trawl through before one that actually says something.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *naswingdressWoman
29 weeks ago

Manchester (she/her)

Why do people use the word offensive to mean anything negative, rather than what it actually means?

Is this a culture war thing? Have some segments of the media warped the meaning of the word offensive to mean anything we don't like? Can we throw hardback dictionaries at them?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rgasmatron1970Man
29 weeks ago

Bromley

"Far too common, we expect at least some thespian dication in first messages to us."

I extend my felicitations

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
29 weeks ago

The Town by The Cross

"So ive seen a number of complaints about starting a message with Hi how are you.

How are people starting off without some kind of polite _ello"

Starting ???

Behave. Most say Hi and ONLY hi. That's all people complain about .... they don't complain about decent messages that begin with hi, how are you.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ony MannMan
29 weeks ago

New York City New York USA

Read the profile, start with something that may interest the recipient or if you noticed them in the forum try starting on that subject.

Perhaps I should stop giving advice to men, my recipients get enough mail that I am hidden in. Lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andPextraCouple
29 weeks ago

North West

Its not offensive. Its boring, likely to to be cut and paste, more often than not from someone who hasnt read the profile.

I can GUARANTEE if I post a new photo i’ll get this. Quite often from the same people, who must stalk the photo galllery and send it to every new photo.

They sont even realise they’ve sent the mesaage multiple times to me.

So, if i can read a message without having to open it, i just bin it.

I’d like to think im worth a) a bit of effort and b) a personalised message

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *mber and FireCouple
29 weeks ago

Carmarthenshire

"Why do people use the word offensive to mean anything negative, rather than what it actually means?

Is this a culture war thing? Have some segments of the media warped the meaning of the word offensive to mean anything we don't like? Can we throw hardback dictionaries at them?"

I'd say so, yeah. Everything portrayed to us is about offense. Not offending people, not offending sensibilities. It's the extreme end of the 'political correctness' scale. Ultimately though, it's about that big old divide in politics; it's just another front to drum in the message that is being shared.

A little too conspiratorial? I'm not attacking anyone, it's just that when we're bombarded by the media with what they want shown, the the talking points they want heard - it doesn't leave much room for actual conversation and sharing opinion, instead of arguing opinion.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *naswingdressWoman
29 weeks ago

Manchester (she/her)

[Removed by poster at 26/04/24 14:59:47]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *naswingdressWoman
29 weeks ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Why do people use the word offensive to mean anything negative, rather than what it actually means?

Is this a culture war thing? Have some segments of the media warped the meaning of the word offensive to mean anything we don't like? Can we throw hardback dictionaries at them?

What I see is a flattening of language. Things aren't undesirable, they aren't boring, they aren't unappreciated. They're offensive.

And offensive is everything from a message containing only one X to denying the Holocaust.

Everything offensive is the same. Therefore it's all as trivial as a stupid message on Fab. Therefore all injustice is overblown.

(Except when it happens to them, and they get offended uh I mean they bravely display indignation against their enemies and defend civilisation because their manly man fee fees were hurt

)

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *elloWoman
29 weeks ago

alpha centauri

"So ive seen a number of complaints about starting a message with Hi how are you.

How are people starting off without some kind of polite _ello"

Seeing 'hi how are tou' on the message teaser doesn't make me rush to open and read it. I'm first opening the ones that start with a knock knock joke.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *mber and FireCouple
29 weeks ago

Carmarthenshire

"Why do people use the word offensive to mean anything negative, rather than what it actually means?

Is this a culture war thing? Have some segments of the media warped the meaning of the word offensive to mean anything we don't like? Can we throw hardback dictionaries at them?

What I see is a flattening of language. Things aren't undesirable, they aren't boring, they aren't unappreciated. They're offensive.

And offensive is everything from a message containing only one X to denying the Holocaust.

Everything offensive is the same. Therefore it's all as trivial as a stupid message on Fab. Therefore all injustice is overblown.

(Except when it happens to them, and they get offended uh I mean they bravely display indignation against their enemies and defend civilisation because their manly man fee fees were hurt

No disagreement here. Language is getting ridiculously lazy and that offends me.

I do like the idea of launching dictionaries at people... too much to hope contact would cause an instant download to their brain?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ondiego85Man
29 weeks ago

nottingham

"Why do people use the word offensive to mean anything negative, rather than what it actually means?

Is this a culture war thing? Have some segments of the media warped the meaning of the word offensive to mean anything we don't like? Can we throw hardback dictionaries at them?

What I see is a flattening of language. Things aren't undesirable, they aren't boring, they aren't unappreciated. They're offensive.

And offensive is everything from a message containing only one X to denying the Holocaust.

Everything offensive is the same. Therefore it's all as trivial as a stupid message on Fab. Therefore all injustice is overblown.

(Except when it happens to them, and they get offended uh I mean they bravely display indignation against their enemies and defend civilisation because their manly man fee fees were hurt

Yeah, you pretty much aced it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ony MannMan
29 weeks ago

New York City New York USA

"Why do people use the word offensive to mean anything negative, rather than what it actually means?

Is this a culture war thing? Have some segments of the media warped the meaning of the word offensive to mean anything we don't like? Can we throw hardback dictionaries at them?"

Even the BBC warp (I like that word) the meaning of words. Reporting using the wrong term or inventing offences.

What chance do we have if the BBC can't get it right. Come on BBC educate us, it's one of the three pillars of your responsibility, educate, inform and entertain.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *naswingdressWoman
29 weeks ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Why do people use the word offensive to mean anything negative, rather than what it actually means?

Is this a culture war thing? Have some segments of the media warped the meaning of the word offensive to mean anything we don't like? Can we throw hardback dictionaries at them?

What I see is a flattening of language. Things aren't undesirable, they aren't boring, they aren't unappreciated. They're offensive.

And offensive is everything from a message containing only one X to denying the Holocaust.

Everything offensive is the same. Therefore it's all as trivial as a stupid message on Fab. Therefore all injustice is overblown.

(Except when it happens to them, and they get offended uh I mean they bravely display indignation against their enemies and defend civilisation because their manly man fee fees were hurt

)

No disagreement here. Language is getting ridiculously lazy and that offends me.

I do like the idea of launching dictionaries at people... too much to hope contact would cause an instant download to their brain?"

It might be too difficult to ask.

It feels to me like some of the studies that have been done on the affects of propaganda and totalitarianism. The reduction of meaning of words is part of that playbook. But because it's piecemeal, we end up in a society where people talk past each other, using their own codes. Mutually incomprehensible languages. But also a ratcheting up of language, because some people do talk about having to defend civilisation because immigrants exist or whatnot. Almost like one side is neutralised into non-existence and one side is being prepared for civil war.

This is not a comment on this thread so much as it is on wider discourse. Which is INSANE.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *naswingdressWoman
29 weeks ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Why do people use the word offensive to mean anything negative, rather than what it actually means?

Is this a culture war thing? Have some segments of the media warped the meaning of the word offensive to mean anything we don't like? Can we throw hardback dictionaries at them?

Even the BBC warp (I like that word) the meaning of words. Reporting using the wrong term or inventing offences.

What chance do we have if the BBC can't get it right. Come on BBC educate us, it's one of the three pillars of your responsibility, educate, inform and entertain. "

The BBC aim for neutrality, but I'm not sure what that means in practice. Whether one considers language a matter of description, prescription, or a variety of the two.

Most people have neither the time nor the mental energy to parse the different nuances of words, it's just jarring when you see it in a context where the word makes no goddamn sense in context.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *mber and FireCouple
29 weeks ago

Carmarthenshire

"It might be too difficult to ask.

This is not a comment on this thread so much as it is on wider discourse. Which is INSANE."

Without pushing too much further passed the topic; America coughs and the UK sneezes. The big blonde idiots we had in charge over the freedom lovin' parts of the world capitalised on this environment already set in motion - but since then it's gone ridiculous.

'Everything' feels designed to provoke a reaction, and so many in quick succession it's exhausting to feel outraged about everything and so the obvious (highlighted on screen, paper and whatever else media of choice) becomes easy and so attractive to latch on to.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rHotNottsMan
29 weeks ago

Dubai & Nottingham

I just think it’s dull and boring rather than offensive.

If that’s all you have to say to somebody then maybe reconsider messaging them, It’s probably a indicator that you don’t actually fancy them that much

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
29 weeks ago

A - do you really care?

B - there's only so many times a day I can say I'm fine

C - I lost interest reading it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *naswingdressWoman
29 weeks ago

Manchester (she/her)

"It might be too difficult to ask.

This is not a comment on this thread so much as it is on wider discourse. Which is INSANE.

Agreed. We need to find a way to disengage.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *agic johnsonMan
29 weeks ago

morden

I always say , I hope this txt finds you well . At least you don't have to answer it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *OYFBWoman
29 weeks ago

Jersey (sometimes Notts)

"So ive seen a number of complaints about starting a message with Hi how are you.

How are people starting off without some kind of polite _ello"

It doesn’t seem genuine. Do people on fab really want to know how I am?

No they don’t. Unless the answer is “I’m soaking wet, gagging for it, will take any cock, anywhere, anytime”

Try something like:

Hello, I hope you’re well and having a good day so far?

Seen your profile and I read that you’re interested in x,[show that you have a genuine interest and have taken time to read the profile] I’d love if you could have a look at my profile also and let me know if you’d be keen for us to chat and see how it goes. Look forward to hearing from you

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ris GrayMan
29 weeks ago

Dorchester

Its a great opener, well done

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ophieslutTV/TS
29 weeks ago

Central

It's probably not offensive - depending on the recipient's profile requests - but people will use profiles and 1st messages to take quick, effective decisions on which senders to block or filter out from contact.

Ask not who is offended but what the hell can you do that's better and more likely to gain interest

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *layfullsamMan
29 weeks ago

Solihull

[Removed by poster at 26/04/24 16:19:43]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *mber SkiesWoman
29 weeks ago

Cwmderi

My messages start with ‘hey’ so I would welcome a hi how are you

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *layfullsamMan
29 weeks ago

Solihull

"So ive seen a number of complaints about starting a message with Hi how are you.

How are people starting off without some kind of polite _ello"

Whaaaasuuuuppppppp like the bud advert

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *enk15Man
29 weeks ago

Evesham

"So ive seen a number of complaints about starting a message with Hi how are you.

How are people starting off without some kind of polite _ello"

I usually go with

"Haven't bothered to read your profile, but will you let me slip you one?"

100% success rate

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ony MannMan
29 weeks ago

New York City New York USA

"So ive seen a number of complaints about starting a message with Hi how are you.

How are people starting off without some kind of polite _ello

Whaaaasuuuuppppppp like the bud advert"

...how about a cold one?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
29 weeks ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

I'm pretty sure that 'Hi, how are you' is as welcome in most inboxes as 'hey, would you like some Jesus in your life' or 'can I ask you a question?'.

Originality wins. Catch someone's eye. Attract their attention and interest.

Maybe try asking them if they like raccoons or what their favourite breed of dog is?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *trueceltMan
29 weeks ago

Bristol

I make real effort to be original in an opening message..I dont do c+p or use text speak..I keep the message brief but not too brief and usually include some kind of conversation opener to be picked up by the receiver, if they wish.

Don't get me wrong, I do okay here but even when I take time and care its all I can do to get a 'fuck off' most of the time.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rHotNottsMan
29 weeks ago

Dubai & Nottingham

I don’t overthink it , i don't make any effort to be original I just say what comes out my mouth as I voice type. But I would never say how are you or anything like that.

If I have nothing in interesting to say I wouldn’t bother them.

Same for me ladies , don’t say hi or how are you ,just message one of the others instead

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *tsJustKateWoman
29 weeks ago

London

100% agree with you!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *tsJustKateWoman
29 weeks ago

London

I don't really care what the opening message is. I always check the profile before reading it and if they are not what I'm looking for I just delete.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *2000ManMan
29 weeks ago

Worthing

Maybe add a little more to the message op.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andi_kinkygramTV/TS
29 weeks ago

Northwich

"So ive seen a number of complaints about starting a message with Hi how are you.

How are people starting off without some kind of polite _ello"

It's usually because not only is it the start of the message, it is the whole message, and it's dull and repetitive to answer even if well intended. Much better to try writing something more engaging.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eliWoman
29 weeks ago

I don't find it offensive. Tad unimaginative, I guess it depends on why it's being asked OP. Who by.

I wouldn't put too much stock in what people have posted on here - even some of those who claim to really dislike it have sent messages saying "hi." "hey you, how are things" "hi, how are you *insert name*"

So what I'd do? Stick to what I want to do. You're not going to be compatible with everyone. Might as well use the site as you want to.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread