FabSwingers.com forum: When do you know your marriage is failing

By *axman82 OP Man
36 weeks ago

Bromley

I dunno, kids, work - do you lose your mojo? When do you quit?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *riendly BiMan
36 weeks ago

When you're questioning everything.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *agnar73Man
36 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

For me, I didn’t see it at the time, bits working, kids, doing what needed doing, you talk, argue, sometimes roll over away from each other.

A few months later, it’s in the door, basically grunting at each other and you know it’s too far gone.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *axman82 OP Man
36 weeks ago

Bromley

What about when you think it’s a blip, when everything feels like if can go wrong and it does, but they don’t get it, I’m on the floor of the kids bedroom now

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *agnar73Man
36 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"What about when you think it’s a blip, when everything feels like if can go wrong and it does, but they don’t get it, I’m on the floor of the kids bedroom now"

Never think it’s a blip. Better talking to her than us to be honest. If you can fix it tonight by talking

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

For the long hall, not momentarily:

- when 1/both's priority isn't the success of you both as a unit

- when 1/both of you mentally checks out

- when 1/both of you breaks the trust or the boundaries

- when 1/both of you start living in your resentments of each other

- when 1/both of you is abusive in any way

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *etal and KinkMan
36 weeks ago

Malice

When your brain has tied you to the bed once more, and you can't move because of the weight of your thoughts. When every day is filled with sadness. When you look at her and all you ask yourself is why.

When that happens it's time to join fab and shake that shit off.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
36 weeks ago

East Sussex

What would love look like on your own,? Better?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
36 weeks ago

East Sussex

^^ life but it's an apt typo

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *weetiepie99Woman
36 weeks ago

cardiff

I'm confused. Does your wife know you're on here?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *axman82 OP Man
36 weeks ago

Bromley

Thanks!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *axman82 OP Man
36 weeks ago

Bromley

U been through it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
36 weeks ago

East Sussex

"U been through it"

Use reply+quote we'll know who you're replying to

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andybeachWoman
36 weeks ago

In the middle

When you think it’s better all round to divorce him rather than spend the rest of your life waiting for things to get better knowing they never will

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ivemealadybonerWoman
36 weeks ago

somewhere

2nd marriage here, first one we just knew the time was up, we married young and just grew up.

2nd marriage recently hit a very rocky patch, all down to me but we worked through it, we had a trial separation and I have to say it worked wonders for us, well me really as I had time to work out stuff in my head, we recently reconciled, some of the issues are still there and wouldn't say we are completely out of the woods yet but we are in a better place than we were 6 months ago, good luck OP x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *naswingdressWoman
36 weeks ago

Manchester (she/her)

"For the long hall, not momentarily:

- when 1/both's priority isn't the success of you both as a unit

- when 1/both of you mentally checks out

- when 1/both of you breaks the trust or the boundaries

- when 1/both of you start living in your resentments of each other

- when 1/both of you is abusive in any way"

Very much this

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *agnar73Man
36 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"U been through it"

Me? Let’s just say I’m life experienced and yeah, been there done that and bought the tshirt.

Better to have an awkward conversation than regret not speaking. Good luck to you bud.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aters139Man
36 weeks ago

Sheffield

I didn't till I was told it was over, but looking back:

-she didn't want to engage in conversation when we were apart (over phone etc)

-she only seemed excited about her plans, not our plans.

-Planning more on her own, putting you off coming along.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hrimper36Couple
36 weeks ago

Central France dept 36

I knew it was over when I drove her to the airport but for me life became so much better and wasn’t over but had just begun but only you know when your marriage is over.

Marriages end but life goes on.

Best of luck op.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *TG3Man
36 weeks ago

Dorchester

When you can't talk about the problems, when the sex dries up, when you just don't care anymore.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *laytonAMan
36 weeks ago

newport

For me it was when we stopped wanting the same things, life became separate and there wasn't a desire to spend time together in any regard. We tried but ultimately we had grown apart as things changed around us, was never my or her intent but didn't spot it until we couldn't go back.

We are really good friends now but just don't have the same goals, desires or any attraction.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ilthycoupleabzCouple
36 weeks ago

Aberdeen

"When you can't talk about the problems, when the sex dries up, when you just don't care anymore. "

This. Mostly when you just don't care.

When I stopped asking/talking/discussing/trying or even arguing back, he thought life was good. I was disengaging and mentally moving on.

When you just don't care enough to try and fix it, it is too late to fix.

MrsAbz

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *elticGent2024Man
36 weeks ago

Kempston

I’m on the floor of the kids bedroom now

You can’t stay there. You either get back in the room with your wife, or in a room in a separate house. You’re in the zombie zone.

Seriously, have a real discussion with your wife. Be frank, open and honest. Do it soon.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
36 weeks ago

East Sussex

I’m on the floor of the kids bedroom now

You can’t stay there. You either get back in the room with your wife, or in a room in a separate house. You’re in the zombie zone.

Seriously, have a real discussion with your wife. Be frank, open and honest. Do it soon.

Very sound advice.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ot to giggleWoman
36 weeks ago

Coventry

I’m on the floor of the kids bedroom now

You can’t stay there. You either get back in the room with your wife, or in a room in a separate house. You’re in the zombie zone.

Seriously, have a real discussion with your wife. Be frank, open and honest. Do it soon.

Very sound advice."

^^^^^^ what they say and dont forget the impact of this on your children? talk - even if its to say how your feeling, and if its not heard, then you need to get a bed somewhere

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
36 weeks ago

East Sussex

I’m on the floor of the kids bedroom now

You can’t stay there. You either get back in the room with your wife, or in a room in a separate house. You’re in the zombie zone.

Seriously, have a real discussion with your wife. Be frank, open and honest. Do it soon.

Very sound advice.

^^^^^^ what they say and dont forget the impact of this on your children? talk - even if its to say how your feeling, and if its not heard, then you need to get a bed somewhere "

I think people often assume children have no idea what's going on with their parents. They do.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

When you discover they are cheating

When you are cheating

When they don't stop lying to you

When the sex stops.

When they treat you like sh*t

When they won't go to therapy

When they stop telling you they love you

When they are abusive

When they are bleeding you dry financially

When they are just a general c*nt

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

My kids were way happier once I threw my ex husband out.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

I’m on the floor of the kids bedroom now

You can’t stay there. You either get back in the room with your wife, or in a room in a separate house. You’re in the zombie zone.

Seriously, have a real discussion with your wife. Be frank, open and honest. Do it soon.

Very sound advice.

^^^^^^ what they say and dont forget the impact of this on your children? talk - even if its to say how your feeling, and if its not heard, then you need to get a bed somewhere

I think people often assume children have no idea what's going on with their parents. They do. "
Yes, I certainly remember my parents arguments when we had gone to bed every evening until my Mother finally left us . It was a horrible time for us kids .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he turned me GreyCouple
36 weeks ago

Warwick and Coventry

"I dunno, kids, work - do you lose your mojo? When do you quit?"

When your in the divorce courts and the CSA has attached your earnings

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

When you join a swinging site without your partners knowledge

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

"I dunno, kids, work - do you lose your mojo? When do you quit?

When your in the divorce courts and the CSA has attached your earnings

Mr "

It's possible to agree it all amicably if both are able to be grown up and out kids first. Sadly often one party isn't... lucky for me on my second divorce we agreed Ed everything without lawyers.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *WB85Man
36 weeks ago

Staffordshire

"When you join a swinging site without your partners knowledge "

Surely nobody would do such a thing.......

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *agatoXXXMan
36 weeks ago

Gone and completely forgotten.

"I dunno, kids, work - do you lose your mojo? When do you quit?"

When she decks you with a saucepan. Or maybe just before then.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he turned me GreyCouple
36 weeks ago

Warwick and Coventry

"I dunno, kids, work - do you lose your mojo? When do you quit?

When your in the divorce courts and the CSA has attached your earnings

It's possible to agree it all amicably if both are able to be grown up and out kids first. Sadly often one party isn't... lucky for me on my second divorce we agreed Ed everything without lawyers. "

I know it possible, tongue in cheek comment

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

When you fall asleep with your dick in your hand, you wake up to her taking pictures of you for evidence and your left eye, catches babe station still on the bedroom telly!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ragonbaitCouple
36 weeks ago

Reading and Aberdare

When I stopped asking/talking/discussing/trying or even arguing back, he thought life was good. I was disengaging and mentally moving on.

When you just don't care enough to try and fix it, it is too late to fix.

MrsAbz"

This is so true. When I told my kids, one of them said they were surprised it was now - if it had been a couple of years earlier they wouldn't have been surprised.

So yeah, we were getting on ok on a friend level, but there was no intimacy (his choice!) and it was killing me.

I knew I had to accept it was over when I went on dating sites and started chatting to men.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he Flat CapsCouple
36 weeks ago

Pontypool

OP - you haven't posted in a while. Please let everyone know that you are OK. DM one of us, at least.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

When you do anything to avoid going home after work

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rettyflamingoWoman
36 weeks ago

Where the flamboyance of flamingos live

When you’re no longer working as a team

When you stay later and later at the office no wanting to go home

When you have nothing to say and aren’t interested in what they say

I basically shut down, disengaged and silence took over

Slept in desperate rooms for months and it took my husband 7 months before he even asked me why I wouldn’t sleep with him

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

"When you do anything to avoid going home after work"

Yup- long way home including a stop out of the way for a cig then steel yourself to head in.

A similar example would be if you have to fire someone when do you know? When you know you have to.

If you’re thinking it’s over then it probably is.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *parkle1974Woman
36 weeks ago

Leeds

It's time to quit when you join fab

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *TG3Man
36 weeks ago

Dorchester

"It's time to quit when you join fab "
true dat

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *istr3ssWoman
36 weeks ago

Stockton-on-Tees

"When you think it’s better all round to divorce him rather than spend the rest of your life waiting for things to get better knowing they never will

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

When she wouldn't go to RELATE or family Dr ,told to to bathroom and have a fecking wank .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ames250122Man
36 weeks ago

Worcester

"I dunno, kids, work - do you lose your mojo? When do you quit?"

Mmmm, probably best seeking the help of a marriage councillor after some research and they feel that they are the right councillor to advise you. You can then talk more in-depth about things that are relevant to your specific situation and marriage to give you the best advice and guidance.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
36 weeks ago

Leeds

When you join a swinging site and pay random women compliments and attention instead of your wife.

The mr

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *key1980Man
36 weeks ago

Okehampton

When she kicks you out?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread