FabSwingers.com forum: Are you afraid of rejection?

By (user no longer on site) OP
36 weeks ago

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By *lowupdollTV/TS
36 weeks ago

Herts/Beds/Lomdon

No.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
36 weeks ago

North West

In what regard?

Professionally - depends. E.g. can cope with not getting through an interview but don't like being overlooked for a new thing within my current role.

Here? Not massively bothered, it's the manner of the rejection that's either tolerable or not.

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By *ittlemissTinselTitsCouple
36 weeks ago

Southampton

Yes yes and thrice yes

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By *ootnootboopCouple
36 weeks ago

Cheshire

Not at all. It's just a part of life.

If you like a person, but it's not reciprocal, why get het up about it as it's never going to happen sadly and would you want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with you anyway?

Best to just feel whatever emotion you feel, and then move past it and chalk it up to a life experience

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By *weetiepie99Woman
36 weeks ago

cardiff

Not on here. Take it all with a pinch of salt. Having said that i never message first, so maybe i am contradicting myself!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
36 weeks ago

"Not on here. Take it all with a pinch of salt. Having said that i never message first, so maybe i am contradicting myself!"

Maybe you are slightly afraid. Only you know

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
36 weeks ago

North East Scotland, mostly

On fab? No. In life? Increasingly less so.

Mrs TMN x

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By *olly SwallowsTV/TS
36 weeks ago

Sexville

Nope I’m issued to it!

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By *weetiepie99Woman
36 weeks ago

cardiff

"Not on here. Take it all with a pinch of salt. Having said that i never message first, so maybe i am contradicting myself!

Maybe you are slightly afraid. Only you know"

I think maybe i am Mr Pickle

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By *reative-mindMan
36 weeks ago

Exeter

Not really, life is full of rejection. Just one of those things.

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By *unlovin72Man
36 weeks ago

BARNSLEY

No I always put on my messages at the end if I am not your type/preference good luck and enjoy.

life is too short to worry sometimes

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By *orny-DJMan
36 weeks ago

Leigh-on-Sea

No, I'm used to it

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

I’m not afraid of it, no. It doesn’t feel good when it happens though.

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By *andering Welsh GuyMan
36 weeks ago

All over the place

As a single male on here you better be ready for it or it won't go well.

Also don't get arsey and abusive if you are rejected

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

No, i don’t see it as personal. Believe it or not I’d reject a lot of folks on here too but I wouldn’t want them to feel bad about it. Preference isn’t an active choice.

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By *elboy1978Man
36 weeks ago

Fellgate

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By *hoirCouple
36 weeks ago

Clacton/Bury St. Edmunds

Depends on where and why I am being rejected.

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By *hilloutMan
36 weeks ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

No. Just a fact of life. Deal with it and move on.

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

No, I'm incredibly resilient

.... if you don't try it's definite no, but if you do try there is a world of endless possibilities!!

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By *ittle Miss TinkerbellWoman
36 weeks ago

your head

On here? No.

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By *lack Orchid 0204Man
36 weeks ago

Leeds

Nope.. lifes too short to worry about such things

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By *ig_eric_tionMan
36 weeks ago

IPSWICH

No. I'm used to it.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
36 weeks ago

Leeds

No, not everyone is going to like everyone and that's ok.

Mrs

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By *ee69Man
36 weeks ago

glasgow

No , used to be but in here and in life there no point , just go for it and if you make a cunt off it , move on

Lol

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By *riving_Home_For_MimiWoman
36 weeks ago

Hampshire/Dorset

Depends who's doing the rejecting.

But yes, massively.

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By *ot to giggleWoman
36 weeks ago

Coventry

No ... hate being made a fool of more.

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By *issBellaWoman
36 weeks ago

Wales

No, it's life. I think if it's for you, it'll happen.

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By *BWLOVER1965Man
36 weeks ago

My Own Little World

Ha Ha

No To old grumpy now to give a flying fuck

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By *rgasmicChemistryCouple
36 weeks ago

east coast

Nope we are good with it x J

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By *J the bullMan
36 weeks ago

Washington

Rejection is fine...

What tears me appart is fear of abandonment once a connection is made

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By *ark73XXXMan
36 weeks ago

North Staffs/South Cheshire

Not in real life no - and here it’s the usual thing.

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By *emorefridaCouple
36 weeks ago

La la land

Yes and no. Think I fear the unknown when it is apparent things aren't working, than the actual rejection bit itself.

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

I'm not afraid of rejection, but some situations will affect me more than others. Being rejected by a friend, family member, or lover will hurt. Especially if they don’t tell you what's going on and play silly games because they're uncomfortable with looking like the bad guy.

On here? Not at all. I've always preferred to send a first message over being the recipient of one and being rejected is sometimes the outcome. Life carries on and I take it on the chin.

Being actively afraid of rejection can really hold a person back.

Nell

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
36 weeks ago

Leeds

Don’t talk daft.

The mr

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By *sWyldWoman
36 weeks ago

Edinburgh

Rejection is part of life, I am more worried about being a let down

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By *oxy jWoman
36 weeks ago

taunton somerset

no such is life

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By *rispyDuckMan
36 weeks ago

Chinese Takeaway near you

Nope!

Not gonna be everyone & it’s fine

Their loss haha

plenty more fish in the sea

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By *riving_Home_For_MimiWoman
36 weeks ago

Hampshire/Dorset

Please keep replies to the forum... I'm not looking for sympathy/disengenous compliments

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By *ee69Man
36 weeks ago

glasgow

Note to self don’t try and be a nice cunt lol

No everyone got agenda , just thought you should no be scared a rejection coz u s nice lady

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By *educing_EmCouple
36 weeks ago

Tipperary

I read that as fear of ejaculation at first

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By *uke OzadeMan
36 weeks ago

Ho Chi Minge City

"I read that as fear of ejaculation at first

Shots fired!

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By *ad NannaWoman
36 weeks ago

East London

No.

I was with my ex, as his mode of rejection was nasty, so I stopped asking.

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By *ts the taking part thatMan
36 weeks ago

southampton

Wouldn't be on Fab if I were.

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By *eliWoman
36 weeks ago

On here? Not from a person I don't know, no.

I suppose I can be at times if I know a person. I'm quite cautious but like people easily. If I think they're not particularly interested I have a tendency to back away because I don't want to embarrass myself nor make them think eurgh, go away.

So yes, to a certain extent I am. It's rather situational though.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
36 weeks ago

I don’t think I’m afraid of it. But I know I don’t like it and it upsets me.

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By *eliWoman
36 weeks ago

"I don’t think I’m afraid of it. But I know I don’t like it and it upsets me. "

Ah maybe it's not fear. I don't like it and protect myself. No, mine is probably fear on some deeprooted level.

Do you not think it can sometimes stop you from enjoying life?

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By *ommander_StraxMan
36 weeks ago

Telford

Oh here? Nah, not really. To put it bluntly it’s a numbers game, and somebody will either like you or not. It’s nothing personal, any more than it’s not personal I prefer my Xbox over my PlayStation. People have different likes, needs etc.

In clubs? That depends. People can be sharp, people can be rude, people can be polite. As long as people are honest that’s fine.

The hard part is when people get personal. I had one couple recently tell me I was too fat and out of shape for them. Fair enough, not what you wanted, but… there are ways to say it.

I’m married to a gorgeous woman, I have an amazing kid, I have all the toys, gadgets and things I need. I’m healthy, I’m secure in my job, I’m happy… if somebody in this lifestyle was enough to ruin that for me, then that person has gone above and beyond, and thankfully I haven’t met them yet!

Just be you. Be honest. Be happy. Because there is somebody for everybody, even this fat guy!

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By *ittlemissTinselTitsCouple
36 weeks ago

Southampton

"Oh here? Nah, not really. To put it bluntly it’s a numbers game, and somebody will either like you or not. It’s nothing personal, any more than it’s not personal I prefer my Xbox over my PlayStation. People have different likes, needs etc.

In clubs? That depends. People can be sharp, people can be rude, people can be polite. As long as people are honest that’s fine.

The hard part is when people get personal. I had one couple recently tell me I was too fat and out of shape for them. Fair enough, not what you wanted, but… there are ways to say it.

Just be you. Be honest. Be happy. Because there is somebody for everybody, even this fat guy!

Fat?? Did they need their eyes testing?! You look great to me x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
36 weeks ago

"On here? Not from a person I don't know, no.

So yes, to a certain extent I am. It's rather situational though. "

That makes sense and I reckon it’s probably how a lot of people feel

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
36 weeks ago

Reading

Does anyone actually enjoy it? Sure you can reframe it so its not painful. But i would rather not get rejected.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
36 weeks ago

"I don’t think I’m afraid of it. But I know I don’t like it and it upsets me.

Ah maybe it's not fear. I don't like it and protect myself. No, mine is probably fear on some deeprooted level.

Do you not think it can sometimes stop you from enjoying life?"

A Cinderella story is one of my favourite films from my childhood and the quote ‘never let the fear of striking out stop you from playing the game’ rings true.

I think not liking rejection can make some things difficult but I think overall it doesn’t stop you from enjoying life. I think fear does though

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By (user no longer on site) OP
36 weeks ago

"Does anyone actually enjoy it? Sure you can reframe it so its not painful. But i would rather not get rejected."

But you can not enjoy something and not be afraid of it.

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By *ommander_StraxMan
36 weeks ago

Telford

In clubs? That depends. People can be sharp, people can be rude, people can be polite. As long as people are honest that’s fine.

The hard part is when people get personal. I had one couple recently tell me I was too fat and out of shape for them. Fair enough, not what you wanted, but… there are ways to say it.

Just be you. Be honest. Be happy. Because there is somebody for everybody, even this fat guy!

Fat?? Did they need their eyes testing?! You look great to me x"

I’m certainly not thin! I don’t think I’m fat, no. I think it was more the case i wasn’t what they wanted? Like looking for BBC and along comes a white guy. It’s never going to be what you want. BUT, as I said, there are ways to go about it! Being polite never hurt anybody!

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
36 weeks ago

Reading

"Does anyone actually enjoy it? Sure you can reframe it so its not painful. But i would rather not get rejected.

But you can not enjoy something and not be afraid of it. "

Maybe but i would still avoid it so the effect is the same. Rats scare the shit out of me so not like that.

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
36 weeks ago

ashford

I think every one is to some extent x

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By *ggdrasil66Man
36 weeks ago

Saltdean

Not anymore. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve gotten used to it.

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By *ynamicnatureMan
36 weeks ago

Doncaster

Not to fussed about being rejected on here.

One door closes whilst another opens

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By *eliWoman
36 weeks ago

"I don’t think I’m afraid of it. But I know I don’t like it and it upsets me.

Ah maybe it's not fear. I don't like it and protect myself. No, mine is probably fear on some deeprooted level.

Do you not think it can sometimes stop you from enjoying life?

A Cinderella story is one of my favourite films from my childhood and the quote ‘never let the fear of striking out stop you from playing the game’ rings true.

I think not liking rejection can make some things difficult but I think overall it doesn’t stop you from enjoying life. I think fear does though"

I loved A Cinderella Story!

I think most people don't like it, not by someone they know. Why should they? It's not pleasant. I can't blame people if they occasionally are afraid of striking out because I know I am.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
36 weeks ago

East Sussex

I don't like it and I'll actively avoid situations in which is think there's more than a 60% chance of it happening. This isn't fear I don't think, it's 'self' preservation

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By *eliWoman
36 weeks ago

"I don't like it and I'll actively avoid situations in which is think there's more than a 60% chance of it happening. This isn't fear I don't think, it's 'self' preservation "

Ah that's a good way of looking at it. Yeah, even on Fab it's still an act of self preservation to not go for something if you think it's highly unlikely to happen.

I guess me drifting away is stopping myself from being hurt, not from fear but from not wanting to experience it.

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By *lex46TV/TS
36 weeks ago

Near Wells

When I was young and growing up I feared rejection but I soon learned that it was probably meant to be.

I’ve spent my adult life not worrying about rejection and carrying on with life.

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By *iscean_dreamMan
36 weeks ago

Llanelli

I wouldn't say I am, sometimes it can be dissapointing but if you haven't been accepted in the past then you're only missing out on the unknown and it might not be as great as you think in your head.

Sometimes the dream is better than the reality.

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By *issy_named_cTV/TS
36 weeks ago

Edinburgh

Isn't that rejection a huge party of the whole cuckolding fantasy/ play ?

Sexually rejected, for which some people actively enjoy the tease, the denial, the chastity even, or the verbal humiliation that goes along with that scene?

Perhaps that is just the fetishisation of traumatic experiences?

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

On fab? If they ignore my message and we've never spoken then no.

If it's someone I've spoken to and I've already imagined having sex with them, I'm a tad disappointed when they change their mind/cancel.

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By *hriscooperMan
36 weeks ago

Warrington

I was married for 18 years, so rejection is 2nd nature. Haha

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

I'm more used to it than afraid

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By *ad NannaWoman
36 weeks ago

East London

I'm a "well fuck you then" kind of person.

I don't waste emotional energy on people I barely know.

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By *illy IdolMan
36 weeks ago

Midlands

I'd say I am. Not so much on here but in real life situations. On here I don't really message often, but thats more because I'm a bit lazy.

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By *ommander_StraxMan
36 weeks ago

Telford

"I'd say I am. Not so much on here but in real life situations. On here I don't really message often, but thats more because I'm a bit lazy."

If I looked like you in any way, I wouldn’t be worried about anything. I mean, I’m only getting the Batman part of you, but I don’t think you have anything to worry about

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By *illy IdolMan
36 weeks ago

Midlands

"I'd say I am. Not so much on here but in real life situations. On here I don't really message often, but thats more because I'm a bit lazy.

If I looked like you in any way, I wouldn’t be worried about anything. I mean, I’m only getting the Batman part of you, but I don’t think you have anything to worry about

I'm a wuss at heart, but thank you, you hunk of a man

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By *coobyBoobyDooWoman
36 weeks ago

at work

Always x

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By *rixie_BlondeWoman
36 weeks ago

London (She/Her)

"I'd say I am. Not so much on here but in real life situations. On here I don't really message often, but thats more because I'm a bit lazy.

If I looked like you in any way, I wouldn’t be worried about anything. I mean, I’m only getting the Batman part of you, but I don’t think you have anything to worry about

I'm a wuss at heart, but thank you, you hunk of a man"

I volunteer to give you both a reassuring hug

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By *ommander_StraxMan
36 weeks ago

Telford

"I'd say I am. Not so much on here but in real life situations. On here I don't really message often, but thats more because I'm a bit lazy.

If I looked like you in any way, I wouldn’t be worried about anything. I mean, I’m only getting the Batman part of you, but I don’t think you have anything to worry about

I'm a wuss at heart, but thank you, you hunk of a man

I volunteer to give you both a reassuring hug

Bless ya! I’m fine, I came to peace with my body and looks a long time ago. I’ve not done too bad for myself! A gorgeous wife, a beautiful daughter and I manage (occasionally!) on here!

I may not be the next David Beckham, but I know all the song lyrics in Shrek 2 and that has to count for something!

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By *adCherriesCouple
36 weeks ago

Cheshire/Northwest

No, I have thick skin - really should see someone about that.

Mrs

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By *rHotNottsMan
36 weeks ago

Dubai & Nottingham

No - not in the slightest, it always interests me why someone says no.

Not in a arrogant way, but genuinely interested not my type, my face, personality, not enough kink etc. useful to understand

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

Growing up when younger was hard for me as am sure for a lot young girls ,boys .

Me bad skin voted the ugliest boy not once but twice ( 3rd 4th year ) , got in to sport which helped me come out my shell not gave 2 fucks what anybody through.

Wow talk about ugly ducking story that was part my life.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
36 weeks ago

East Sussex

"I don't like it and I'll actively avoid situations in which is think there's more than a 60% chance of it happening. This isn't fear I don't think, it's 'self' preservation

Ah that's a good way of looking at it. Yeah, even on Fab it's still an act of self preservation to not go for something if you think it's highly unlikely to happen.

I guess me drifting away is stopping myself from being hurt, not from fear but from not wanting to experience it. "

I just think that if there was a good chance I'd burn my hand sticking it in a fire I wouldn't do it.

I do wonder as I get older whether taking the 40% chance might lead to some exciting adventures.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
36 weeks ago

East Sussex

"Growing up when younger was hard for me as am sure for a lot young girls ,boys .

Me bad skin voted the ugliest boy not once but twice ( 3rd 4th year ) , got in to sport which helped me come out my shell not gave 2 fucks what anybody through.

Wow talk about ugly ducking story that was part my life.

Voted ugliest boy

that's horribly unkind

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By *ittleMissCali_MrDJCouple
36 weeks ago

wonderland.

On here.. no

If it was job related would depend on why and what but I would still probably mostly just feel that there must be a reason

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By *entleman JayMan
36 weeks ago

Wakefield

No. You need the skin of a rhino on here.

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By *WB85Man
36 weeks ago

Staffordshire

No. Not at all.

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By *ittlemissTinselTitsCouple
36 weeks ago

Southampton

"No. You need the skin of a rhino on here. "

I've got the arse of one

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By *ripfillMan
36 weeks ago

Paris, New York, Hong Kong and Havant

Rejection is tough, no matter where it comes from but it’s also an enabler.

If you’re not affected by it then somewhere I think in you, you are affected but not letting it out.

One great thing about the FAB community I find is that it on the whole it is non judgemental

People pass on you of course but you can find some great people on here too,

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By *orbidden eastMan
36 weeks ago

london dodging electric scooters

Not at all

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

Nah, it is what it is

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

No its part and parcel of life.

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By *eronicaExplorerWoman
36 weeks ago

London

Yes

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By (user no longer on site) OP
36 weeks ago

"Yes"

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By *ormalfornorfolkMan
36 weeks ago

Norwich

I’ve learned to embrace it.

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By *tylebender03Man
36 weeks ago

Manchester

No it’s water of a ducks back haha

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By *avexxMan
36 weeks ago

cheshire

at my age no chance

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By *929Man
36 weeks ago

newcastle

I never chase or make first move so rejection not an issue.

rejection in the form of not getting a job I priced used to bother me but water off a ducks back these days can’t win them all haha

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By *N69Man
36 weeks ago

Yeovil

You get used to it sending the first message on here lol

It’s part of life, think depends what the rejection is.

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
36 weeks ago

chichester

Nope

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By *BWLOVER1965Man
36 weeks ago

My Own Little World

Don’t give shit

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By (user no longer on site)
36 weeks ago

I fear rejection, once I am invested.

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By *ggdrasil66Man
36 weeks ago

Saltdean

I’m a geezer, some people don’t think we should exist. They can go fuck themselves. Also im working class and proud of it. So if you don’t fancy a bit of rough, then jog on…

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By *he turned me GreyCouple
36 weeks ago

Warwick and Coventry

I'm more fearful of the feelings and emotional pain attached to rejection

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By *ife NinjaMan
36 weeks ago

Dunfermline

You get use to it. It becomes the norm

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