FabSwingers.com forum: To be a gentleman or not be a gentleman?

By *J James OP Man
39 weeks ago

Hull

Obviously being a gentleman on here seems to be a turn off to most women as it only seems to result in not being read or immeadiatly deleted.

Somebody please restore my faith that being a pushy dick isn't the key to success on here.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
39 weeks ago

North West

What's meant by a "gentleman"?

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By *educing_EmCouple
39 weeks ago

Tipperary

"What's meant by a "gentleman"?"

I think he means being polite, non Pushy, making an effort with the first message.

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By *J James OP Man
39 weeks ago

Hull

Exactly

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

"Obviously being a gentleman on here seems to be a turn off to most women as it only seems to result in not being read or immeadiatly deleted.

Somebody please restore my faith that being a pushy dick isn't the key to success on here."

How do you know that the "pushy dicks" get replies?

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By *ealitybitesMan
39 weeks ago

Belfast

A true gent never has to remind anyone that they are one and would never consider that the actions of others are more rewarding.

Anything else is just an indication that it's no more than roleplay.

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By *ruceyyMan
39 weeks ago

London

"Obviously being a gentleman on here seems to be a turn off to most women as it only seems to result in not being read or immeadiatly deleted.

Somebody please restore my faith that being a pushy dick isn't the key to success on here.

How do you know that the "pushy dicks" get replies?

I do to be fair

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

I actually hate the word gentleman, it doesn't need to be discussed. If someone is one it will show in their actions not words so most women won't pay attention to that.

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By *ruceyyMan
39 weeks ago

London

"I actually hate the word gentleman, it doesn't need to be discussed. If someone is one it will show in their actions not words so most women won't pay attention to that."

To be fair the only action you can do here is send pictures...I can send you a picture of flowers?

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By *J James OP Man
39 weeks ago

Hull

Some of them proudly announce so and some on other platforms confess that it works. Yes they may well be lying but some buggers must be getting replies!

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By *enk15Man
39 weeks ago

Evesham

Just be who you are, don't pretend to be anything else.

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By *ruceyyMan
39 weeks ago

London

"Some of them proudly announce so and some on other platforms confess that it works. Yes they may well be lying but some buggers must be getting replies!"

DJ James big up 2k24!

Replies doesn't equal sex anyway so don't worry about it too much! Speaking from a dry penis experience!

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

I have no words.

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By *inochioMan
39 weeks ago

Derbyshire

Ive decided to wait for a couple to message me first but even when that unlikely event happens being polite and non pushy is not a successful strategem. I think i either need plastic surgery or a personality transplant. I think the forums have some entertainment value but im finding fab is a nightmare minefield for a solo male profile. Ive 218 days left of membership but i wont sign back up. Clubs and private parties are my next direction.

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By *CLM87Woman
39 weeks ago

Derbyshire

For me if the attraction isn't there and they've sent a nice message, I will generally apologise and say not for me.

I prefer the so to speak gentleman, I don't do nsa and so want someone I can hold an intelligent conversation with and someone who will respect me and not just see me as a sex object for their gratification.

Not everyone is looking for the same and some get off on degradation and being seen in that way.. but as I say.. each to their own

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By *J James OP Man
39 weeks ago

Hull

I guess there's no right or wrong approach just having a very bad week and probably ovetthinkinh things.

All the replies and comments are very appreciated

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
39 weeks ago

North West

"I have no words.

Let me open the door for you

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

"I have no words.

Let me open the door for you

Makes a change from people slamming it in my face.

Appreciated.

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By *ruceyyMan
39 weeks ago

London

"I have no words.

Let me open the door for you

Makes a change from people slamming it in my face.

Appreciated."

The only door I'm slamming shut is the hotel room door once you're in it with me.

#gentleman

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

Oh well....I'm definitely not a gentleman..

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

"I have no words.

Let me open the door for you

Makes a change from people slamming it in my face.

Appreciated.

The only door I'm slamming shut is the hotel room door once you're in it with me.

#gentleman"

Your room or mine?

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

I do feel for you OP.

It is very difficult for single guys to get replies on here and the reason is couples and single ladies

Especially get bombarded with messages from single guys ranging from very polite and well written to down right rude and disgusting…. The problem is we get so many that it becomes exhausting and tedious to even attempt to answer them all. When we first joined fab we spent ages replying to anyone that had clearly put effort in and read our profile even if it was just to say thank you but your not for us.. we found this was taking up so much of our time that we soon lost interest in doing so… it’s unfortunate that decent polite guys do get ignored. I’d say your best bet for getting to meet people is going to a club and chatting to people at a bar or in a hottub etc if your a polite nice guy then you will stand a chance there… or wait till you see a status from someone asking to meet single guys then you may have more chance.. hope that clarifies things for you and maybe helps… sorry for such a long winded reply lol

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

Op.Rejection runs rife here.

Just because we send messages

Do they get read

Did you send a polite message.

Do we connect

Are we compatible

We all interpret messages in our own way.

Being rejected ..no message reply.It is not required to respond.Irks me that

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By *ruceyyMan
39 weeks ago

London

"I have no words.

Let me open the door for you

Makes a change from people slamming it in my face.

Appreciated.

The only door I'm slamming shut is the hotel room door once you're in it with me.

#gentleman

Your room or mine?"

Preferably yours. I like the feminine scents

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By *J James OP Man
39 weeks ago

Hull

No your reply actually helps

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

"I actually hate the word gentleman, it doesn't need to be discussed. If someone is one it will show in their actions not words so most women won't pay attention to that.

To be fair the only action you can do here is send pictures...I can send you a picture of flowers?"

I'm not looking for a gentleman that's why I wanna see the peen.

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

"Obviously being a gentleman on here seems to be a turn off to most women as it only seems to result in not being read or immeadiatly deleted.

Somebody please restore my faith that being a pushy dick isn't the key to success on here."

Had lots of pushy messages but some messages melted my heart

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By *eyond PurityCouple
39 weeks ago

Lincolnshire

To get replies, you’ve got to come across as interesting, appealing, intriguing. Your profile needs to be interesting, your pics intriguing and your messages appealing.

It’s not anyone’s fault why people don't get replies, except your own.

Your status update is very negative and not gentlemanly. Negativity breeds negativity.

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

"…

Somebody please restore my faith that being a pushy dick isn't the key to success on here."

Some women like me to push my dick…

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By *ittlemissTinselTitsCouple
39 weeks ago

Southampton

"…

Somebody please restore my faith that being a pushy dick isn't the key to success on here.

Some women like me to push my dick…

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

Personally for me.

I was respectful but with an edge.

Too 'nice' is boring (I'm here to fuck, afterall)

But going in with 'I wanna tear your cunt apart' doesn't do it for me either haha.

I don't think your issue is being a gentleman. It's more the ocean of men you are getting lost in.

It's not personal

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

"Personally for me.

I was respectful but with an edge.

*Want respectful.

(Not was)

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

I want a gentleman before and after but during

Nope I want animistic

I am not your wife I am just some broad your screwing so screw me like it

All jokes aside

Being a gentleman isn’t something you can turn off or on it it is then it’s fake your only acting that way to get some sex

Being nice and considerate and careing should come naturally even if sex isn’t on the table

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

I want some conversation. I never engage in talking " dirty" and I want more than someone looking to get their dick wet ! I am really really hard work though! So I understand if someone gets bored and wanders off !

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By *eeliciouschaosWoman
39 weeks ago

Wherever

Your OP screams negativity and passive aggressiveness which is a major turn off for many.

The website FAQ states clearly no reply means not interested so maybe it’s not about how gentlemanly one is or isn’t, maybe it’s because people just simply aren’t interested.

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By *ario1972Man
39 weeks ago

Guildford

"Just be who you are, don't pretend to be anything else.

I am well and truly ficked!

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By *eroLondonMan
39 weeks ago

Mayfair

Bumping this for all the cads, bounders, rapscallions, unholy knights and unprincipled chevaliers and chancers and those oft-forgotten ungentlemanly genital-men. •·

·•

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

I’m happy to be the gent I am on the streets and you know the rest

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By *agnar73Man
39 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"Your OP screams negativity and passive aggressiveness which is a major turn off for many.

The website FAQ states clearly no reply means not interested so maybe it’s not about how gentlemanly one is or isn’t, maybe it’s because people just simply aren’t interested. "

This.

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By *rill PhilMan
39 weeks ago

Crediton

Just be who you are, and if it doesn't go well for you you can either blame everyone else by implying they're wrong for not wanting you, or accept that maybe you need to work on yourself.

I have chosen the second path.

That's not exactly working out any better for me in the sex department but, I feel I know who I am better so, I guess that's good?

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By *entInEssexMan
39 weeks ago

Grays

I would say that being your true self is better than pretending to be someone or something you aren’t.

If you have to chose between either being, or not being a gentleman then are you are neither. Manners, respect and being polite are totally free of charge the same as being yourself

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
39 weeks ago

East Sussex

"Obviously being a gentleman on here seems to be a turn off to most women as it only seems to result in not being read or immeadiatly deleted.

Somebody please restore my faith that being a pushy dick isn't the key to success on here."

Do you want to meet women who are daft enough to respond to 'pushy dicks'?

Most women want a man they get on with. All this stuff about women only want a bad boy is rubbish. Women want men not boys.

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By *agneto.Man
39 weeks ago

Bham

I think you need to be a middle ground. The pushy dicks will get recognised as pushy dicks. The 'nice' guys who are trying too hard to be nice and caring that it seems like a ploy with be identified.

Those normal people in the middle, who can be a playful and fun but still be respectful and not take the piss will probably have a better chance of hitting it off. If they fit in the other person's preferences.

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By *rHotNottsMan
39 weeks ago

Dubai & Nottingham

"What's meant by a "gentleman"?

I think he means being polite, non Pushy, making an effort with the first message. "

That’s just being a decent human isn’t it ? This gentleman stuff seems so old school like being decent is some kind of USP? It’s a minimum requirement

I’m not pushy at all but if I want someone I let them know it, I wouldn’t faff around pretending I want to talk about pizza and opening doors when I’m thinking about pinning them against a wall and kissing them

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
39 weeks ago

East Sussex

Also being a gentleman and being nice doesn't entitle anyone to sex.

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By *naswingdressWoman
39 weeks ago

Manchester (she/her)

If someone is polite and I'm not interested I'll delete.

If someone is impolite I'll delete and possibly block regardless of whether I'd otherwise be interested.

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By *oxy jWoman
39 weeks ago

taunton somerset

its a attraction rejection scene if no ones interested then quite simply no one is interested ... being a gentleman means nothing its just words if the attraction is not there ....i find it strange people hide behind this just accept most people wont be interested as in normal life but 100 times harder due to the volume of men..

if no ones interested then you simply have to wait until hopefully someone is but one thing for sure on this scene there is simply NOT someone for everyone far to few women and couples for that to be remotely close to happening

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By *ecadent_DevonMan
39 weeks ago

Okehampton

Be you. Warts and all

Er on second thoughts, oh you know what I mean I’m sure

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By *ouples_EroticaXXXCouple
39 weeks ago

manchester

"Obviously being a gentleman on here seems to be a turn off to most women as it only seems to result in not being read or immeadiatly deleted.

Somebody please restore my faith that being a pushy dick isn't the key to success on here."

Gentleman or attempted white knight. There is a huge different. Also being a gentlemen doesn’t mean you’ll be found anymore attractive!

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By *oxy jWoman
39 weeks ago

taunton somerset

"Obviously being a gentleman on here seems to be a turn off to most women as it only seems to result in not being read or immeadiatly deleted.

Somebody please restore my faith that being a pushy dick isn't the key to success on here.

Gentleman or attempted white knight. There is a huge different. Also being a gentlemen doesn’t mean you’ll be found anymore attractive!"

ahh the white knight ...massive turn off too

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
39 weeks ago

Central

Most people just will not be a match for most others. And this will include that some will dislike the dishonest, rude and devoid of charm. By being yourself, you get to make it easier for others to meet the right person. It should go without saying that everyone should be respectful and there's perhaps nothing that any gender is unable to do, such that they are courteous, charming and seductive, in the right ways, at the right time.

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By *TG3Man
39 weeks ago

Dorchester

You can't win either way so i can't give you any further clues

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
39 weeks ago

chichester

You just need huge hanging balls to win at fabswingers That’s the cheat code

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By *rooperRedMan
39 weeks ago

Littlehampton

The road to Fab is littered with men who thought they deserved attention simply because they wrote a nice message. It doesn't work that way here. You can toil forever and then unexpectedly get plucked from obscurity only to find yourself right back in the pit with the rest of us as someone else takes their fancy.

Welcome to Fab.

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By *BWLOVER1965Man
39 weeks ago

My Own Little World

"What's meant by a "gentleman"?"

Someone who doesn’t wipe there cock on you’re curtains on way out

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
39 weeks ago

chichester

"What's meant by a "gentleman"?

Someone who doesn’t wipe there cock on you’re curtains on way out

I just drag my cock across the carpet in way out to dry off

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
39 weeks ago

chichester

"The road to Fab is littered with men who thought they deserved attention simply because they wrote a nice message. It doesn't work that way here. You can toil forever and then unexpectedly get plucked from obscurity only to find yourself right back in the pit with the rest of us as someone else takes their fancy.

Welcome to Fab. "

Welcome to the meat grinder

. Men just have to throw themselves in ultimately

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By *rooperRedMan
39 weeks ago

Littlehampton

Welcome to Fab.

Welcome to the meat grinder

. Men just have to throw themselves in ultimately "

Well, you could drag it on my carpet anytime, but yeah, hop in to the meatgrinder and play the game if you want, send a thousand messages and go for it, just be aware that them's the rules... I've gone to sit on the sidelines, better use of my time.

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
39 weeks ago

chichester

Welcome to Fab.

Welcome to the meat grinder

. Men just have to throw themselves in ultimately

You could look using an AI app to send messages for you.

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

If someone is interested in you then they will reply, gentleman or not

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By *rispyDuckMan
39 weeks ago

Chinese Takeaway near you

"If someone is interested in you then they will reply, gentleman or not"

This

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By *rooperRedMan
39 weeks ago

Littlehampton

Welcome to Fab.

Welcome to the meat grinder

. Men just have to throw themselves in ultimately

You could look using an AI app to send messages for you.

Scary thing is, if AI is trained on real messages, will it just start sending dick pics?

(Apart from yours, that's a thing of not only good proportions but aesthetically pleasing, obviously.)

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By *rispyDuckMan
39 weeks ago

Chinese Takeaway near you

I’m a gentleman between 8:30am & 2pm

Rest of the time I’m a cheeky bastard haha

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By *oupleSouthEast69Couple
39 weeks ago

brighton

Do you really think you'd be more successful if you were a 'pushy dick'?

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By *naswingdressWoman
39 weeks ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Do you really think you'd be more successful if you were a 'pushy dick'?"

The thing that worries me about threads like these is that some men seem to think that being nice is something you only do if it gets results.

Why not treat people with respect and politely because it's the right thing to do?

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By *ife NinjaMan
39 weeks ago

Dunfermline

What do you want to be OP? You have to look at yourself in the morning and think 'he's a decent fella' or not

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By *iaisonseekerMan
39 weeks ago

Liverpool

Fab is a busted flush. Time to restore the courtly love paradigm.

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By *agnar73Man
39 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"What's meant by a "gentleman"?

Someone who doesn’t wipe there cock on you’re curtains on way out

Drat. I thought that was the done thing.

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By *ane Doe1000Woman
39 weeks ago

Luton

Just be yourself - write a polite message - I always try to reply to those that do even if I’m not interested, and wish them luck

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By *ueerKinkyCoupleCouple
39 weeks ago

Cambridge (She/They And They/Them)

I hate these questions.

“I’m a nice guy but women are not giving me what I want so I’m considering being coercive and nasty to them”. This sentence is not the thought process of a nice guy.

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

Literally don’t know how to be a ‘pushy dick’ but it makes no difference anyway.

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By *TG3Man
39 weeks ago

Dorchester

Actors do well here

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By *echnosonic_BrummieMan
39 weeks ago

Willenhall

"What's meant by a "gentleman"?"

What's meant by a "pushy dick"? If I don't push it, I get complaints...

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By *orksRockerMan
39 weeks ago

Bradford

"Do you really think you'd be more successful if you were a 'pushy dick'?

The thing that worries me about threads like these is that some men seem to think that being nice is something you only do if it gets results.

Why not treat people with respect and politely because it's the right thing to do?"

Agreed, if you have to make a conscious decision, you're probably not in that category already.

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By *eroLondonMan
31 weeks ago

Mayfair

Be a gentleman but not a genital man.

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

Sorry op this may seem a bit mean but it’s not ment to be

You ither are or aren’t there is no off switch if there is you only fake it

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