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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Hi I've been interested in the swinging for most of my adult life, I've had a profile on here for a while and didn't put to much effort into it as I was just curious I've already been to chams with a friend and she has now been going with her boyfriend for a while now. I told my wife I was interested and would like us to try it or at least have some fun with it, she was shocked that I was even thinking about it the conversation was "am I not enough for you?" However she told me she needs time to think about it as it was something she'd never thought about doing. What I would like to know is how you guys first started out?

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By *ll-Knight-longMan
over a year ago

Derby/Notts(Long Eaton)


"Hi I've been interested in the swinging for most of my adult life, I've had a profile on here for a while and didn't put to much effort into it as I was just curious I've already been to chams with a friend and she has now been going with her boyfriend for a while now. I told my wife I was interested and would like us to try it or at least have some fun with it, she was shocked that I was even thinking about it the conversation was "am I not enough for you?" However she told me she needs time to think about it as it was something she'd never thought about doing. What I would like to know is how you guys first started out? "

Started out with my ex wife in very much the same way ....then she got really interested in exploring her bi side....more than anything it opened up my / our honesty wife sex the " taboo subject "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had been curious for quite a few years but never had the chance because i was in a relationship and she was not interested so i just let it go.But when we broke up i told myself to just go and enjoy myself so did a bit of research and watched a few swingers videos on the net.

Fast forward a year and i'm having the time of my life and definitly not going back anytime soon its so addictive...or i have a problem

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

good luck, hope it works out for you both

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I used to bring the idea of swinging up when were having sex with scenarios etc and she would get really turned on.

Then suggested that we try it for real and she agreed and we have not looked back .

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

All positive how about any bad sides or stories?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I used to bring the idea of swinging up when were having sex with scenarios etc and she would get really turned on.

Then suggested that we try it for real and she agreed and we have not looked back ."

I've done the same she's always said wish you had another pair of hands or 2 cocks lol but until now she's always thought I was joking when I said we should try it

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By *ll-Knight-longMan
over a year ago

Derby/Notts(Long Eaton)


"All positive how about any bad sides or stories? "

You have to be totally honest and open and not to expect to own your partners body but more the case of share our experiences . Keep away from jealousy as the green monster can break rocky relationships. The fun should be equal over the course of time where both parties have a reward from the fun and a part of the meet decisions

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"All positive how about any bad sides or stories?

You have to be totally honest and open and not to expect to own your partners body but more the case of share our experiences . Keep away from jealousy as the green monster can break rocky relationships. The fun should be equal over the course of time where both parties have a reward from the fun and a part of the meet decisions "

We would be taking it slow as we have never been with anyone but our selves for 21 years we're not jealous people but its never been tested to the extreme what my greatest fear is, is that we get to the point of joining someone or us and things go wrong is there anything we should look out for? Or just trust our own instinks ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"All positive how about any bad sides or stories? "

Ok being negative - you need to be honest. And you are on here as a single verified male who admits to going to a club with someone that isn't his wife. Whatever spin on it that is far from honest and open.

And without meaning to be judgemental swinging rarely saves a struggling relationship. Not saying yours is but deceit is rarely a sign of a secure relationship.

Out of interest why do you want your wife to swing?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi I've been interested in the swinging for most of my adult life, I've had a profile on here for a while and didn't put to much effort into it as I was just curious I've already been to chams with a friend and she has now been going with her boyfriend for a while now. I told my wife I was interested and would like us to try it or at least have some fun with it, she was shocked that I was even thinking about it the conversation was "am I not enough for you?" However she told me she needs time to think about it as it was something she'd never thought about doing. What I would like to know is how you guys first started out? "

OP, the one thing that comes over from what you have said, is that you are clearly at completely different points on the 'journey' into swinging. If you put ANY pressure on her in ANY way, you will blow it (no pun int!). The two of you need to talk and talk until you have reached a decision together. And if that decision is not to your liking, you have to accept that. I have seen too many couples come to grief when one or other is doing it to 'please' the other. It rarely ends well....

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"All positive how about any bad sides or stories?

Ok being negative - you need to be honest. And you are on here as a single verified male who admits to going to a club with someone that isn't his wife. Whatever spin on it that is far from honest and open.

And without meaning to be judgemental swinging rarely saves a struggling relationship. Not saying yours is but deceit is rarely a sign of a secure relationship.

Out of interest why do you want your wife to swing?

I set the profile up and I couldn't add my wife to the profile later and I'm on as married verified because one of those friends are on here and now with couple profile, eyes I've been to cams with another women well there was 4 of us all curious about what happened I know I was being dishonest by going but I needed to know before I could bring up the subject for real I'm really glad I went it helped so much to change my _iews of what I've seen and herd about swingers. I want my wife to be a part of this or what's the point? My idea of swinging is to add something special to our relationship. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 22/03/13 20:51:22]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP-i may have this wrong but if youve been on here a while and have been to a club, surely it would be at best awkward and probably damaging for your relationship if you were recognised etc when you started to swing together (if she decided it was something she wanted as well).

Just a thought.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"All positive how about any bad sides or stories?

Ok being negative - you need to be honest. And you are on here as a single verified male who admits to going to a club with someone that isn't his wife. Whatever spin on it that is far from honest and open.

And without meaning to be judgemental swinging rarely saves a struggling relationship. Not saying yours is but deceit is rarely a sign of a secure relationship.

Out of interest why do you want your wife to swing?

I set the profile up and I couldn't add my wife to the profile later and I'm on as married verified because one of those friends are on here and now with couple profile, eyes I've been to cams with another women well there was 4 of us all curious about what happened I know I was being dishonest by going but I needed to know before I could bring up the subject for real I'm really glad I went it helped so much to change my _iews of what I've seen and herd about swingers. I want my wife to be a part of this or what's the point? My idea of swinging is to add something special to our relationship. "

Does your wife know you are on here? And that you went to chams? If so then I take it back.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Hi I've been interested in the swinging for most of my adult life, I've had a profile on here for a while and didn't put to much effort into it as I was just curious I've already been to chams with a friend and she has now been going with her boyfriend for a while now. I told my wife I was interested and would like us to try it or at least have some fun with it, she was shocked that I was even thinking about it the conversation was "am I not enough for you?" However she told me she needs time to think about it as it was something she'd never thought about doing. What I would like to know is how you guys first started out?

OP, the one thing that comes over from what you have said, is that you are clearly at completely different points on the 'journey' into swinging. If you put ANY pressure on her in ANY way, you will blow it (no pun int!). The two of you need to talk and talk until you have reached a decision together. And if that decision is not to your liking, you have to accept that. I have seen too many couples come to grief when one or other is doing it to 'please' the other. It rarely ends well....

I'm pretty sure that people who are interest in swinging don't have the idea at the same time but yes I understand the pressure bit and we are talking, the journey is already fun though, and thanks for replies "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you wife doesn't want to swing will you continue?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"All positive how about any bad sides or stories?

Ok being negative - you need to be honest. And you are on here as a single verified male who admits to going to a club with someone that isn't his wife. Whatever spin on it that is far from honest and open.

And without meaning to be judgemental swinging rarely saves a struggling relationship. Not saying yours is but deceit is rarely a sign of a secure relationship.

Out of interest why do you want your wife to swing?

I set the profile up and I couldn't add my wife to the profile later and I'm on as married verified because one of those friends are on here and now with couple profile, eyes I've been to cams with another women well there was 4 of us all curious about what happened I know I was being dishonest by going but I needed to know before I could bring up the subject for real I'm really glad I went it helped so much to change my _iews of what I've seen and herd about swingers. I want my wife to be a part of this or what's the point? My idea of swinging is to add something special to our relationship.

Does your wife know you are on here? And that you went to chams? If so then I take it back.

"
yes

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If you wife doesn't want to swing will you continue? "
no I don't think I will there are enough men on here that lie about there relationship status however a bridge to cross if it happens

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So why did she ask if she wasnt enough for you when she already knew that you had been going to chams etc?

Im sure if you have an honest conversation things will become clearer!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"All positive how about any bad sides or stories?

Ok being negative - you need to be honest. And you are on here as a single verified male who admits to going to a club with someone that isn't his wife. Whatever spin on it that is far from honest and open.

And without meaning to be judgemental swinging rarely saves a struggling relationship. Not saying yours is but deceit is rarely a sign of a secure relationship.

Out of interest why do you want your wife to swing?

I set the profile up and I couldn't add my wife to the profile later and I'm on as married verified because one of those friends are on here and now with couple profile, eyes I've been to cams with another women well there was 4 of us all curious about what happened I know I was being dishonest by going but I needed to know before I could bring up the subject for real I'm really glad I went it helped so much to change my _iews of what I've seen and herd about swingers. I want my wife to be a part of this or what's the point? My idea of swinging is to add something special to our relationship.

Does your wife know you are on here? And that you went to chams? If so then I take it back.

yes "
but not until I found the right time to ask her about it

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"OP-i may have this wrong but if youve been on here a while and have been to a club, surely it would be at best awkward and probably damaging for your relationship if you were recognised etc when you started to swing together (if she decided it was something she wanted as well).

Just a thought."
been once 2 months ago and there was only 6 of us there I've never spoken to anyone from here until now, ironically but intend to delete this profile and set a couple one up together when the times right which could be ages, good point though I have thought about it but I've told her I've been now so all sorted plus didn't play while I was there

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thank you all for your advise sort of straying from the original question a bit but thanks anyway, hope you have fun now and have a nice weekend x

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