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"My favourite is 'this sounds like a you problem, not a me problem' " My husband uses this phrase all the time, so annoying!!! | |||
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"Message “hi. How are you” My reply: “Not been too good” I go off on some random spiel and totally make them wish they never asked " I was just about to type the same thing | |||
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"My favourite is 'this sounds like a you problem, not a me problem' My husband uses this phrase all the time, so annoying!!! " I used it a lot in previous jobs when I knew I was leaving. I also signed off my emails with ZFG* *(Zero Fucks Given). Nobody ever questioned it. | |||
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"At Cornell University in America they have an incredible piece of scientific equipment known as the tunnelling electron microscope. Now, this microscope is so powerful that by firing electrons you can actually see images of the atom, the infinitesimally minute building blocks of our universe. If I were using that microscope right now, I still wouldn't be able to locate my interest in your problem. Now - fack orff." Rolls off the tongue, Felix. (It's great though!) | |||
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"On answer to the "how long is a piece of string statement". "Twice as long as half of it". Sit back and watch the cogs turn." Twice the distance from the middle to the end, is my reply to that! | |||
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"When they ask “why the hell you’re single?” I usually respond “probably because I’m fat, ugly, broken and mentally unstable”. I never hear from them again. " Wish I had the inbox to make a retort like that | |||
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"Message “hi. How are you” My reply: “Not been too good” I go off on some random spiel and totally make them wish they never asked " Love this one. | |||
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"When they ask “why the hell you’re single?” I usually respond “probably because I’m fat, ugly, broken and mentally unstable”. I never hear from them again. Wish I had the inbox to make a retort like that " In my case it actually the truth so me being unapologetically honest saves anyone’s time before they got to find out in person. Win win. | |||
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"When men send a message saying "mmmmm" I ask why they are making microwave noises." Gonna have to remember that one | |||
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"When they ask “why the hell you’re single?” I usually respond “probably because I’m fat, ugly, broken and mentally unstable”. I never hear from them again. Wish I had the inbox to make a retort like that In my case it actually the truth so me being unapologetically honest saves anyone’s time before they got to find out in person. Win win. " Fair points if true ... But you maybe underselling yourself x | |||
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"I would squish u to death! When asked would u sit on my face! x" Can think of worse ways to climb the curtain and join the choir invisible | |||
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