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World Autism Awareness day !!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

As you all know my 14yr old daughter has this dreadful mind altering problem. She is at the very severe end, with profound learning difficulties and no speech. As there are so many strains of Autism sometimes it's hard to know who has it or not. There are toddler tantrums and there are meltdowns both look very similar but are very different and there has to be certain ways of dealing with Meltdowns, as you can't just tell them to be quiet or even ask whats wrong because they just don't understand.

I have been asked to leave super stores because my daughter was making such a fuss, but now i stand up to them and for others around me that i have seen being hassled by shop staff.

so there are still a lot people out there that don't know what Autism is all about so please lets spread the word !!!

April 2nd is World Autism Awareness day, and lets light it up blue... Get your blue xmas lights out , wear blue on the day. If everybody did a little something we would know how much awareness is out there.... So please get that old blue jumper/Jeans out and give it an airing !!

Wouldn't it be lovely if Fabs went blue on that day

Thank you HotRuby XxxX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i work with people with autism.. so totally agree more understanding is needed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hey Hun, my 10 yr old son has Autism, not severe but mainly social and emotional!!!

I know how hard it is when your child behaves a certain way and people look at them like they're monsters!!!

My son rocks and sways, makes funny noises but I always tell him if people can't accept him for who he is then it's their problem not his!!!

Our children are not retarded they are just more special, thank u for putting this post up xxxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Hey Hun, my 10 yr old son has Autism, not severe but mainly social and emotional!!!

I know how hard it is when your child behaves a certain way and people look at them like they're monsters!!!

My son rocks and sways, makes funny noises but I always tell him if people can't accept him for who he is then it's their problem not his!!!

Our children are not retarded they are just more special, thank u for putting this post up xxxx"

I always think it's us as in people that can be retarded (apologies if that is a bit strong) These children have no worries in life and live day to day as we let them. Yes they do flap,sway and make funny sounds, but in reality so we when we get rat arsed, but no one takes any notice. So why should they do it to a child !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi

I have a 23 year old daughter with Aspergers and she is a gift but still when she cannot cope people judge but, she has grown up to feel that she has special ways and others do not understand. SO she is never upset by narrow minded attitudes.

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

bump

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hey Hun, my 10 yr old son has Autism, not severe but mainly social and emotional!!!

I know how hard it is when your child behaves a certain way and people look at them like they're monsters!!!

My son rocks and sways, makes funny noises but I always tell him if people can't accept him for who he is then it's their problem not his!!!

Our children are not retarded they are just more special, thank u for putting this post up xxxx

I always think it's us as in people that can be retarded (apologies if that is a bit strong) These children have no worries in life and live day to day as we let them. Yes they do flap,sway and make funny sounds, but in reality so we when we get rat arsed, but no one takes any notice. So why should they do it to a child !! "

People don't always understand. Not excusing them, just saying.

Stand your ground and educate them. Xx

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"bump "
into me one day

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

God daughter suffers from this. I'll be going blue

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By *ummy mummyWoman
over a year ago

southampton-ish

My 7 year old son has Aspergers and it has been my biggest challenge to get my mum to accept it and that his behavior is not that of a spoiled child,bit that of a child whose mind can not process things the same as we do,he is on the lower end if the spectrum,very high functioning but his main problems lie in the social and emotional side of things,with great anxieties. This house will be going blue that day

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"i work with people with autism.. so totally agree more understanding is needed "

me too

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Thanks for the heads up. I'll be blue too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It isn't a disability or a disorder it's a condition. And no one 'suffers' from it. They are affected by it.

Or more precisely people with autism are affected by shit for brains intolerant Joe Public!

Some put their children in clothing bearing the slogan: ‘I’m autistic: Please be understanding’. A better slogan would be. ‘I’m autistic and you’re an arse hole if you’ve got a problem with it’

Respect

x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thank you for all for that has responded, those that children in the prospective please PM me would love to have a chat. Sometimes i feel fill i am on my own esp at night . xxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"It isn't a disability or a disorder it's a condition. And no one 'suffers' from it. They are affected by it.

Or more precisely people with autism are affected by shit for brains intolerant Joe Public!

Some put their children in clothing bearing the slogan: ‘I’m autistic: Please be understanding’. A better slogan would be. ‘I’m autistic and you’re an arse hole if you’ve got a problem with it’

Respect

x

"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

I have been asked to leave super stores because my daughter was making such a fuss, but now i stand up to them and for others around me that i have seen being hassled by shop staff.

[Got kicked out of a softplay once. In Uttoxeter, it's shut down now (good!). for having a go at a snotty woman who was tutting at my son]

xx

Wouldn't it be lovely if Fabs went blue on that day

Thank you HotRuby XxxX"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good Call!

I work with people living with Learning & Physical Disabilities.

Autism plays a major part in many of these peoples lives and we have many an occasion when we are enjoying time out and about where we come across misunderstanding, ignorance and fear of these conditions.

The more aware we all are, the better we can all help make the lives of the Autistic and those with other Learning Disabilities.

Great stuff.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Good Call!

I work with people living with Learning & Physical Disabilities.

Autism plays a major part in many of these peoples lives and we have many an occasion when we are enjoying time out and about where we come across misunderstanding, ignorance and fear of these conditions.

The more aware we all are, the better we can all help make the lives of the Autistic and those with other Learning Disabilities.

Great stuff."

I do the same job and totally agree with this

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

It's not just the child/children that need taking care of, it's us as parents that suffer big time.

I have had some wonderful personal messages sent to me since putting the thread up and i give my up most RESPECT to all of you.

I am very lucky in the way of that i have almost everything in place for my daughter , she goes to one of the countries best schools for special needs, I have 26 respite nights a year and although my ex was a shit husband he is a fabulous father and has his girls every other weekend and a week at Easter and 2 weeks in the summer hols, often at xmas as well. (Mind you i did have to take him to court for that)

As she is getting older she is getting stronger although i have been taught to restrain her as an adult, sometimes she is just too quick for me and i end up covered in bruises.

I coped with crying my eyes out at night because the little bugger won't sleep, disinfecting walls down because of smearing etc. The day the onsies (sorry the spelling) came out was a blessing in disguise because by putting them on back to front stopped all that.

She decorates my kitchen walls every time she eats, can-not use knife/fork so its the fingers all the time.

Over the last 14 yrs i have learn't the hard way of dealing with Autism but i have also helped a lot mums/dads with information that i have picked up along the way making it slightly easier for them.

My friends and family say i deserve a medal for what i go through and say that couldn't do what i have to do.

I don't need a medal, i just get on with it and do what i have to do because i LOVE her and i wouldn't to change her at all, for she is what she is.

And for those that say i couldn't do that, yes YOU would if she was yours.

Thank you so much again for taking time out to read my thread... XxxX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 21/03/13 12:27:16]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes i do many things. Including having sex given half the chance (soz).

Without wanting to sound snotty I'm a teacher in adult ed. But fed up with the unpredictability of agency work have been a support worker for adults with autism for a year now.

Empathy is what's required with everyone needing to think 'what if it was their son or daughter?'

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

Have just began working with an autistic child...am still very much learning and a long way to go. Seen a wonderful thing that the child did which brought me to tears

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Have just began working with an autistic child...am still very much learning and a long way to go. Seen a wonderful thing that the child did which brought me to tears"

My daughter gave me her first kiss when she was 4 years old i was so excited that i phoned my "then" husband to tell him, only to be told "I can't talk about this now i am in a meeting"

All these little people take for granted it takes months even years to teach an Autistic child to achieve anything!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's not just the child/children that need taking care of, it's us as parents that suffer big time.

I have had some wonderful personal messages sent to me since putting the thread up and i give my up most RESPECT to all of you.

I am very lucky in the way of that i have almost everything in place for my daughter , she goes to one of the countries best schools for special needs, I have 26 respite nights a year and although my ex was a shit husband he is a fabulous father and has his girls every other weekend and a week at Easter and 2 weeks in the summer hols, often at xmas as well. (Mind you i did have to take him to court for that)

As she is getting older she is getting stronger although i have been taught to restrain her as an adult, sometimes she is just too quick for me and i end up covered in bruises.

I coped with crying my eyes out at night because the little bugger won't sleep, disinfecting walls down because of smearing etc. The day the onsies (sorry the spelling) came out was a blessing in disguise because by putting them on back to front stopped all that.

She decorates my kitchen walls every time she eats, can-not use knife/fork so its the fingers all the time.

Over the last 14 yrs i have learn't the hard way of dealing with Autism but i have also helped a lot mums/dads with information that i have picked up along the way making it slightly easier for them.

My friends and family say i deserve a medal for what i go through and say that couldn't do what i have to do.

I don't need a medal, i just get on with it and do what i have to do because i LOVE her and i wouldn't to change her at all, for she is what she is.

And for those that say i couldn't do that, yes YOU would if she was yours.

Thank you so much again for taking time out to read my thread... XxxX "

I work in a respite home and so many times we have parents who go through the same as you feeling guilty leaving their child with us because they think they have failed their child. We always say they have never failed , there is either one or two parents who cope at home whereas we have a whole team to cope. Parents should never feel guilty about leaving their child they need me time and in getting that their child also gets their time when back home.

I'm not very good at writing what I mean I just hope that comes across the way I intend it too xxx

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

I will be wearing blue too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll be blue blue....

X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My son is the most loving genuine person I have ever had the pleasure of knowing.

This is true of many autistic people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My son is the most loving genuine person I have ever had the pleasure of knowing.

This is true of many autistic people. "

Same here. My boy is on the spectrum but high functioning. Such a sweet, loving boy, but finds it hard to make friends because of his inflexibility and is too "in your face". I used to be called a soft parent as people thought I was spoiling him, but I knew how genuinely upset he would get about things that appear small to us. Can't imagine how challenging it must be for those of you with children at the other ends of the spectrum, hats off to you xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One of my friends has a 13 year old with severe Autism. And he's now been placed in a School in Devon. He will only be allowed home for 4 weeks a year and its so heartbreaking for all involved

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By *urvyfanMan
over a year ago

Salisbury

My Daughter is 7 and has autism. She is very loving, very caring, very honest, very literal and at times very difficult to deal with.

This morning she found a school crayon in her cardigan pocket and was mortified that she had "taken school property home, because the crayon belongs to the school and I must take it back Daddy" The crayon was old, scraggy and had been sharpened within a few centimetres of its life so school wouldn't have even noticed it missing. But to her it was a crayon that she got from the pot on her desk so it should stay there in its place.

Have had plenty of tears out of frustration and overwhelming joy. The rewards soon make you forget the last meltdown.

I could rattle on for hours about the good and bad times, the things she loves, the things she can't do, the things she obsesses over and her life so far. What you would learn is that I feel absolutely priveledged to be her Dad.

My advice to anyone with an autistic child is to persevere through trial and error to find what strategies work for your child. There isn't a one size fits all strategy so you will need to be very very very patient. And if a strategy that once worked but doesn't anymore - start trying others again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 21/03/13 13:53:14]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"One of my friends has a 13 year old with severe Autism. And he's now been placed in a School in Devon. He will only be allowed home for 4 weeks a year and its so heartbreaking for all involved "

Fortunately I can only imagine what it must be like. My heart goes out to them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My Daughter is 7 and has autism. She is very loving, very caring, very honest, very literal and at times very difficult to deal with.

This morning she found a school crayon in her cardigan pocket and was mortified that she had "taken school property home, because the crayon belongs to the school and I must take it back Daddy" The crayon was old, scraggy and had been sharpened within a few centimetres of its life so school wouldn't have even noticed it missing. But to her it was a crayon that she got from the pot on her desk so it should stay there in its place.

Have had plenty of tears out of frustration and overwhelming joy. The rewards soon make you forget the last meltdown.

I could rattle on for hours about the good and bad times, the things she loves, the things she can't do, the things she obsesses over and her life so far. What you would learn is that I feel absolutely priveledged to be her Dad.

My advice to anyone with an autistic child is to persevere through trial and error to find what strategies work for your child. There isn't a one size fits all strategy so you will need to be very very very patient. And if a strategy that once worked but doesn't anymore - start trying others again."

Wise words indeed. Every minute I spend in the company of my chuildren (not just the good times) is priceless. Nothing (and I mean nothing) has ever brought me half as much pleasure.

Digressing slightly. And it must be at least 3 years ago now via the car radio I heard that they were close to being able to detect autism in ultrasound scans of babies. Baron-Cohen was in on it.

The thought that anyone would choose not to have a baby just because (s)he might be like my son was the most upsetting thing ever for me. It was a good job I was stationary at the traffic lights when I broke down in tears.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I don't think i could ever give up on a child no matter what the disability. At my daughters school they have every disability going and next door they have an ordinary secondary school whose pupils often go in and help, with shows, sports days etc. Some of them even go on to become teachers or LEA's.

I think that children who are disruptive constantly in class, should spend at least one day helping in a school like my daughters, just to show them how hard life can be for others.

Recently My daughter was nominated for an achievement award, which she won and we had to go to a local theater in Chelmsford to get this award. Now knowing how unpredictable she can be i was dreading being beaten up by her in front of one and all. All went well she loved the music and dancing that was put on and then when her name was called she taken by her LEA to the stage to meet the Mayor (was holding my breath big time at this point thinking please don't nut the mayor lol) She took the award from him and instead of shaking his hand she went in to give him a kiss much to his surprise and mine. She was sat next to him and everytime he clapped for another pupil again she kissed him.

She has the most amazing personality when she uses it, and has had us in stitches from time to time.

But i could go on for ever telling you about her antics lol

If you want a laugh and would like to know then please say !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Excellent comments about disruptive secondary school children. I’ve done some cover supervisor work in them and it would certainly bring them down a peg or three and do them the world of good.

My son’s picture was on the local MENCAP Year Book at the end of last year carrying the Olympic torch for his school. I also acquired two tickets for the Paralympics from the school. It was inspirational to say the least and he loved London eye etc. as well.

Like you I could go on, and on. As I’ve said: priceless

xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


" Excellent comments about disruptive secondary school children. I’ve done some cover supervisor work in them and it would certainly bring them down a peg or three and do them the world of good.

My son’s picture was on the local MENCAP Year Book at the end of last year carrying the Olympic torch for his school. I also acquired two tickets for the Paralympics from the school. It was inspirational to say the least and he loved London eye etc. as well.

Like you I could go on, and on. As I’ve said: priceless

xx

"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Soz if I’ve hijacked your post somewhat babe. I almost PMed you to say that. Was gonna put a post on here just to keep it in the fore but you’ve beat me to it.

Sounds like you’re gonna have such a good time on Saturday. Wish I was going with you. Or seeing to you there

xx

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By *owlmMan
over a year ago

Wakefield

[Removed by poster at 22/03/13 21:58:02]

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By *owlmMan
over a year ago

Wakefield


"[Removed by poster at 22/03/13 21:58:02]"

I will say adult autistic people do worry me a bit. I worry for their lives because we live in such a superficial pretentious world full of hate and lacking diversity. 'i just wan to work with someone i can have a drink with' was something a relative of mine said. this seems to be indicative of the type of people who run our establishments. shallow and cruel. its difficult to be autistic in this world where managers prefer a dd escort for a secretary instead of a productive intelligent albeit quirky autistic person. its only at times of war when everyone clubs together that we pool are intelligence. the rest of the time we are fluffing each other up trying to climb the greasy pole.

My mind is very dark. can someone enlighten me????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"[Removed by poster at 22/03/13 21:58:02]

I will say adult autistic people do worry me a bit. I worry for their lives because we live in such a superficial pretentious world full of hate and lacking diversity. 'i just wan to work with someone i can have a drink with' was something a relative of mine said. this seems to be indicative of the type of people who run our establishments. shallow and cruel. its difficult to be autistic in this world where managers prefer a dd escort for a secretary instead of a productive intelligent albeit quirky autistic person. its only at times of war when everyone clubs together that we pool are intelligence. the rest of the time we are fluffing each other up trying to climb the greasy pole.

My mind is very dark. can someone enlighten me????"

In times of war: interesting. Winston Churchill was on the spectrum, of course.

"I have nothing to offer you but blood, sweat, tears and toil" and all that.

He called his dark moods Black Dog

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Strange to make the supposition 'of course' in relation to Winston Churchill being autistic. I've read and studied a great deal about him and his handling of WW2 and I've never heard anyone suggest he had ASC any point on the spectrum. He was, in fact, sociable and flexible.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"Strange to make the supposition 'of course' in relation to Winston Churchill being autistic. I've read and studied a great deal about him and his handling of WW2 and I've never heard anyone suggest he had ASC any point on the spectrum. He was, in fact, sociable and flexible. "
He was not on the autistic spectrum at all. He had depressive episodes. Very different from the diagnosis of autism.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know very little tbh and ok maybe should have said 'is suspected by some to have had autistic tendencies'. And there was no such thing until 1943.

None of us are perfect and the great man made many boo-boos in his earlier life, didn't he?

I sincerely believe that the innovators: the ones who are capable of thinking outside the box; the ones who move society forwards in a positive way, are essentially 'different'. Albeit not always with a formal 'placed neatly in a box' diagnosis. I think most truly great people don't do all that good in formal education.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"I know very little tbh and ok maybe should have said 'is suspected by some to have had autistic tendencies'. And there was no such thing until 1943.

None of us are perfect and the great man made many boo-boos in his earlier life, didn't he?

I sincerely believe that the innovators: the ones who are capable of thinking outside the box; the ones who move society forwards in a positive way, are essentially 'different'. Albeit not always with a formal 'placed neatly in a box' diagnosis. I think most truly great people don't do all that good in formal education. "
I would agree with you there, often people with autistic traits including Aspergers and the whole spectrum, are not coping well with the traditional education system because they are indeed "wired" differently. And yet they are often capable of really great things.

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