FabSwingers.com forum: Replies from a message

By *exytimeCool OP Man
39 weeks ago

swadlincote

Does everyone on here find that when you see a profile that you like and read to your liking send a message yet not often ever get a reply back? Lets face it be nice to get something back for sure

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By *gent CoulsonMan
39 weeks ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

Women get hundreds of messages a day.

Just take as a not interested and move on

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

You have to remember that the average woman online these days has to deal with a ton of messages every day. We outnumber them a minimum of 10:1 and that's being extremely generous lol.

Even after some patience, you might never get a reply. Just forget and move on. Create that closure yourself, take their silence as "No thanks" and it gets much easier.

Nowadays, I don't really care too much anymore. It's depressing if you let it get to you. You can't control the actions of others, so focus on something that you CAN control instead.

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

You haven't asked for profile advice so I won't give

But......hint hint

Majority of people will not respond to blank profile

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By *ros40Man
39 weeks ago

Bedford

Send all messages with hope

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By *igtatsMan
39 weeks ago

gravesend

I like to be polite and compliment but never expect anything back lol

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By *revaunanceCouple
39 weeks ago

Exeter

Hello OP,

A lot of people will use having a blank profile pic as a filter, and not look any further.

Put it this way, would you be interested in meeting with a silhouette?

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By *ou only live onceMan
39 weeks ago

London

No reply is a reply.

I know that can feel harsh, especially when on the receiving end, but pretty standard and just saves everyone time in the long run.

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By *ong-leggedblondWoman
39 weeks ago

Next Door

It's is nice to get a reply, even if it's just thank you. But too many men think this is more than a kind thank you reply and then bombard you will messages.

Then whinge that they get blocked for no reason!

So no, it's not rude not to reply

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By *olfandtazCouple
39 weeks ago

Bristol

Or they just bombard you for no reason!

We get messages daily, even more when we post up for a meet. Running the inbox becomes a full time job! I can only imagine what it's like for a single woman on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

If i am lucky enough to get a msg or wink or fab i try my best to send a thank you msg and leave it at that.

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By *viatrixWoman
39 weeks ago

Redhill

I send a “I’m not interested in the slightest”, OP. Would you prefer that?

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
39 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

Many take a no thanks as a personal insult. Or any response at all as enough of an opening to launch into the rest of their spiel.

I usually do send a no thanks. But the sensible choice honestly would be to just not and block and delete the people who don't interest me.

I get upwards of 30 messages a day from people my profile says I'm not interested in. Even spending a minute on each would add up to hours every week.

I appreciate it's nice to get a response when you reach out to someone. But when there's nothing of interest or nothing to connect to why should someone lose that time for what is probably a bland copy paste or 3 word nothing message to any viable orifice?

People aren't being rude to you by not responding. Just making better use of their time

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By *eyond PurityCouple
39 weeks ago

Lincolnshire

What would you like them to reply?

If there’s no response, then assume it’s a no.

Unless they specifically asked for your message then it’s unsolicited - in which case you’ve decided to send it, so there should be no expectation to reply.

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

"Hello OP,

A lot of people will use having a blank profile pic as a filter, and not look any further.

Put it this way, would you be interested in meeting with a silhouette?"

This. I just delete messages with a shadow profile pic.

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By *TG3Man
39 weeks ago

Dorchester

We out number women by 96.15 so its a full time job trying to keep up with messages

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By *TG3Man
39 weeks ago

Dorchester

"We out number women by 96.15 - 1 so its a full time job trying to keep up with messages

"
yo

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By *egDaySkipperMan
39 weeks ago

Liverpool

I have met ladies who have over 1k messages in their inbox.

If I have more than 4, I log off because I can't be bothered to read and reply to them all

I have 0 expectations for a reply even if they message me first

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By *omKsubSMan
39 weeks ago

Newton

Personally I get far more replies than I thought I would.

While I have a generic message, I try to tailor and include mutual interests and anything that stands out from their profile or pictures.

I don't expect a reply, prefer the message is deleted if no interest and always say thank you to a rejection (unless they are being insulting, then I report and block).

Mind you, I am also very clear in what I am looking for... although coming up to my birthday (and a huge decrease in responses as a result) I am looking for something a bit different.

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By *hrek101Man
39 weeks ago

Herts

Wait, what??? People can reply???...

Who knew

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By *omKsubSMan
39 weeks ago

Newton

"Wait, what??? People can reply???...

Who knew"

They do yes... and it's not always a 'fuck off' either

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By *TG3Man
38 weeks ago

Dorchester

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
38 weeks ago

Leeds

"You haven't asked for profile advice so I won't give

But......hint hint

Majority of people will not respond to blank profile

This, the 1st thing I do when someone messages is look at their profile to see if we are compatible if there's nothing there then we won't reply.

Mrs

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By *iss DevilWoman
38 weeks ago

Bedford

You may have liked them but they obviously didn't like you and/or your message.

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By *issmorganWoman
38 weeks ago

Calderdale innit

"You haven't asked for profile advice so I won't give

But......hint hint

Majority of people will not respond to blank profile

This, the 1st thing I do when someone messages is look at their profile to see if we are compatible if there's nothing there then we won't reply.

Mrs "

Same

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By *TG3Man
38 weeks ago

Dorchester

"You may have liked them but they obviously didn't like you and/or your message. "
harsh he seems like a nice chap

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By *ascaIMan
38 weeks ago

Cheshire Liverpool Manchester

Like others have said it’s easy for your message to get lost in amongst the hundreds of dick pics women are sent on a daily basis. It’s best to just accept it and have a little cry before bed. Works for me.

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By *uffnmuffCouple
38 weeks ago

London

"Does everyone on here find that when you see a profile that you like and read to your liking send a message yet not often ever get a reply back? Lets face it be nice to get something back for sure "
we have over 200 unopened messages in our in box I do try to respond to them all but as fast as I answer them more come in I just don't have the time it's like a full time job. X

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By *TG3Man
38 weeks ago

Dorchester

"Does everyone on here find that when you see a profile that you like and read to your liking send a message yet not often ever get a reply back? Lets face it be nice to get something back for sure we have over 200 unopened messages in our in box I do try to respond to them all but as fast as I answer them more come in I just don't have the time it's like a full time job. X"
exactly my services are available at a very reasonable £#@ per hour

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By *coobyBoobyDooWoman
38 weeks ago

Markfield

Think of your message arriving in a ladies inbox like her getting a takeaway menu thru her letter box, if there’s nothing there that she likes the sound of she won’t ring and order and will probs just pop the menu in the recycling and not bother to look at it again, sorry x

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By *TG3Man
38 weeks ago

Dorchester

"Think of your message arriving in a ladies inbox like her getting a takeaway menu thru her letter box, if there’s nothing there that she likes the sound of she won’t ring and order and will probs just pop the menu in the recycling and not bother to look at it again, sorry x "
I just chuck all of them in the bin without looking so don't really understand your logic

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By (user no longer on site)
38 weeks ago

Some people get lots of messages daily. You can’t expect them to reply “no thank you” to every single one.

If I leave our inbox to build up over a few days there’s sometimes over 100 messages there. People I want to talk to even get lost and end up deleted.

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By *TG3Man
38 weeks ago

Dorchester

"Some people get lots of messages daily. You can’t expect them to reply “no thank you” to every single one.

If I leave our inbox to build up over a few days there’s sometimes over 100 messages there. People I want to talk to even get lost and end up deleted. "
that is the never ending problem of fab the genuine guys who youve got a vibe going with their messages get missed

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By *iasubTV/TS
38 weeks ago

Ilkeston

"Some people get lots of messages daily. You can’t expect them to reply “no thank you” to every single one.

If I leave our inbox to build up over a few days there’s sometimes over 100 messages there. People I want to talk to even get lost and end up deleted. "

Same as me i do think it would be easier to hire a PA

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By *rill PhilMan
38 weeks ago

Crediton

I used to feel this way too. Now, I'm just glad if my messages get read!

Best advice I can give... expect nothing. That way, ANY interaction you get will seem like a win. Even if it's as simple as having a message get read.

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By (user no longer on site)
38 weeks ago

"Some people get lots of messages daily. You can’t expect them to reply “no thank you” to every single one.

If I leave our inbox to build up over a few days there’s sometimes over 100 messages there. People I want to talk to even get lost and end up deleted.

Same as me i do think it would be easier to hire a PA

It can be overwhelming. I think people also forget that if you reply to every message, that then opens the door for them to contact you in the future if you decide to change your filters.

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By *TG3Man
38 weeks ago

Dorchester

"Some people get lots of messages daily. You can’t expect them to reply “no thank you” to every single one.

If I leave our inbox to build up over a few days there’s sometimes over 100 messages there. People I want to talk to even get lost and end up deleted.

Same as me i do think it would be easier to hire a PA

"
lol

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By *iasubTV/TS
38 weeks ago

Ilkeston

"Some people get lots of messages daily. You can’t expect them to reply “no thank you” to every single one.

If I leave our inbox to build up over a few days there’s sometimes over 100 messages there. People I want to talk to even get lost and end up deleted.

Same as me i do think it would be easier to hire a PA

It can be overwhelming. I think people also forget that if you reply to every message, that then opens the door for them to contact you in the future if you decide to change your filters. "

I didnt even think about that. Explains why sometime people get through mine then

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By *hriscooperMan
38 weeks ago

Warrington

Like most have said, your profile is key. Your pics and bio should have been done with a bit of care and thought etc.

Looks like you've already added some pics which will help you. I'd add more pics too, get creative.

Maybe alter what I assume is a typo and correct your height from 5 foot to 6? I apologise if I'm wrong.

Try and make your message stand out and only message ladies that are looking for what you are.. In other words is someone says they only want BBC, or only want a couple, don't think you can chance your arm and perseude them. Otherwise..

If does tickle me up though when ladies want you to spend time and write a well thought out message telling them this, that and the other for them to just either hit delete or block because they have too many messages to read.. Maybe they should be a bit more ruthless with the old filters to only allow those they may be interested in to message them? I do think that some use it as a massive ego boost, especially when some put on thier update or start threads on here with the title something along the lines of "how many messages have you got today?"

Other than that, if they don't reply, don't let it get to you and move on as most don't have the time or inclination to reply to everyone.

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By *coobyBoobyDooWoman
38 weeks ago

Markfield

"Think of your message arriving in a ladies inbox like her getting a takeaway menu thru her letter box, if there’s nothing there that she likes the sound of she won’t ring and order and will probs just pop the menu in the recycling and not bother to look at it again, sorry x I just chuck all of them in the bin without looking so don't really understand your logic

Equivalent of Block and delete

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By *TG3Man
38 weeks ago

Dorchester

"Think of your message arriving in a ladies inbox like her getting a takeaway menu thru her letter box, if there’s nothing there that she likes the sound of she won’t ring and order and will probs just pop the menu in the recycling and not bother to look at it again, sorry x I just chuck all of them in the bin without looking so don't really understand your logic

Equivalent of Block and delete

"
lol

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By *elboy1978Man
38 weeks ago

Fellgate

I very rarely get a reply and when I do it’s one to say not interested don’t know where I am going wrong

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By *aizyWoman
38 weeks ago

west midlands

I sent a thanks but not for me type msg once, he sent back a 10 question questionnaire he wanted me to answer, about how he could improve his profile. I hate questionnaire's so I don't bother anymore.

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By *rill PhilMan
38 weeks ago

Crediton

"I sent a thanks but not for me type msg once, he sent back a 10 question questionnaire he wanted me to answer, about how he could improve his profile. I hate questionnaire's so I don't bother anymore."

Look. I don't know how many times I have to apologise for this but, without taking the time to research, how am I supposed to find the magic formula to manipulate... I mean... charm women?

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By *ilsaGeorgeCouple
38 weeks ago

kent

We just sent a reply back. He isn’t for us, but he was polite and respectful and wrote a nice message. So we replied, politely and respectfully x

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By *aizyWoman
38 weeks ago

west midlands

Look. I don't know how many times I have to apologise for this but, without taking the time to research, how am I supposed to find the magic formula to manipulate... I mean... charm women? "

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By *TG3Man
38 weeks ago

Dorchester

Look. I don't know how many times I have to apologise for this but, without taking the time to research, how am I supposed to find the magic formula to manipulate... I mean... charm women? "
follow my lead

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By *omKsubSMan
38 weeks ago

Newton

Look. I don't know how many times I have to apologise for this but, without taking the time to research, how am I supposed to find the magic formula to manipulate... I mean... charm women? "

There isnt one, to charm I mean as the manipulation part is just... ick.

Saying that, the forum challenges are good, as is bringing up a common interest or part of her (or his) profile that you really like is good.

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By *rill PhilMan
38 weeks ago

Crediton

Look. I don't know how many times I have to apologise for this but, without taking the time to research, how am I supposed to find the magic formula to manipulate... I mean... charm women?

There isnt one, to charm I mean as the manipulation part is just... ick.

Saying that, the forum challenges are good, as is bringing up a common interest or part of her (or his) profile that you really like is good."

Well, it was intended as a joke! If I hadn't had some lovely chats with Daizy I wouldn't have said it but, I know she can take it!

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By *omKsubSMan
38 weeks ago

Newton

Look. I don't know how many times I have to apologise for this but, without taking the time to research, how am I supposed to find the magic formula to manipulate... I mean... charm women?

There isnt one, to charm I mean as the manipulation part is just... ick.

Saying that, the forum challenges are good, as is bringing up a common interest or part of her (or his) profile that you really like is good.

Well, it was intended as a joke! If I hadn't had some lovely chats with Daizy I wouldn't have said it but, I know she can take it! "

I gathered that from her reaction. The ick part was for when it is not in jest or prior arranged.

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By *rill PhilMan
38 weeks ago

Crediton

Look. I don't know how many times I have to apologise for this but, without taking the time to research, how am I supposed to find the magic formula to manipulate... I mean... charm women?

There isnt one, to charm I mean as the manipulation part is just... ick.

Saying that, the forum challenges are good, as is bringing up a common interest or part of her (or his) profile that you really like is good.

Well, it was intended as a joke! If I hadn't had some lovely chats with Daizy I wouldn't have said it but, I know she can take it!

I gathered that from her reaction. The ick part was for when it is not in jest or prior arranged."

Ah I see. Do people ever publicly say they want to manipulate women not in jest?

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By *omKsubSMan
38 weeks ago

Newton

Look. I don't know how many times I have to apologise for this but, without taking the time to research, how am I supposed to find the magic formula to manipulate... I mean... charm women?

There isnt one, to charm I mean as the manipulation part is just... ick.

Saying that, the forum challenges are good, as is bringing up a common interest or part of her (or his) profile that you really like is good.

Well, it was intended as a joke! If I hadn't had some lovely chats with Daizy I wouldn't have said it but, I know she can take it!

I gathered that from her reaction. The ick part was for when it is not in jest or prior arranged.

Ah I see. Do people ever publicly say they want to manipulate women not in jest?"

Unfortunately yes. I've seen a few posts and more than a few in the chat rooms.

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By *rill PhilMan
38 weeks ago

Crediton

Look. I don't know how many times I have to apologise for this but, without taking the time to research, how am I supposed to find the magic formula to manipulate... I mean... charm women?

There isnt one, to charm I mean as the manipulation part is just... ick.

Saying that, the forum challenges are good, as is bringing up a common interest or part of her (or his) profile that you really like is good.

Well, it was intended as a joke! If I hadn't had some lovely chats with Daizy I wouldn't have said it but, I know she can take it!

I gathered that from her reaction. The ick part was for when it is not in jest or prior arranged.

Ah I see. Do people ever publicly say they want to manipulate women not in jest?

Unfortunately yes. I've seen a few posts and more than a few in the chat rooms."

Oh that's depressing.

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By *host63Man
38 weeks ago

Bedfont Feltham

"Does everyone on here find that when you see a profile that you like and read to your liking send a message yet not often ever get a reply back? Lets face it be nice to get something back for sure "

It's called being a man on here and outside your chances of a positive outcome on here are microscopic.

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By *omKsubSMan
38 weeks ago

Newton

Look. I don't know how many times I have to apologise for this but, without taking the time to research, how am I supposed to find the magic formula to manipulate... I mean... charm women?

There isnt one, to charm I mean as the manipulation part is just... ick.

Saying that, the forum challenges are good, as is bringing up a common interest or part of her (or his) profile that you really like is good.

Well, it was intended as a joke! If I hadn't had some lovely chats with Daizy I wouldn't have said it but, I know she can take it!

I gathered that from her reaction. The ick part was for when it is not in jest or prior arranged.

Ah I see. Do people ever publicly say they want to manipulate women not in jest?

Unfortunately yes. I've seen a few posts and more than a few in the chat rooms.

Oh that's depressing. "

That they do it yes. What isnt depressing is the number of guys who call them out on it.

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By *rill PhilMan
38 weeks ago

Crediton

Look. I don't know how many times I have to apologise for this but, without taking the time to research, how am I supposed to find the magic formula to manipulate... I mean... charm women?

There isnt one, to charm I mean as the manipulation part is just... ick.

Saying that, the forum challenges are good, as is bringing up a common interest or part of her (or his) profile that you really like is good.

Well, it was intended as a joke! If I hadn't had some lovely chats with Daizy I wouldn't have said it but, I know she can take it!

I gathered that from her reaction. The ick part was for when it is not in jest or prior arranged.

Ah I see. Do people ever publicly say they want to manipulate women not in jest?

Unfortunately yes. I've seen a few posts and more than a few in the chat rooms.

Oh that's depressing.

That they do it yes. What isnt depressing is the number of guys who call them out on it."

That does take the sting out slightly. Still... I don't know which I find worse, the fact that guys think like that, or the fact they're prepared to say it out loud.

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By *iss DevilWoman
38 weeks ago

Bedford

"You may have liked them but they obviously didn't like you and/or your message. harsh he seems like a nice chap

Might be harsh but at least I'm not beating about the bush.

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By *ex HolesMan
38 weeks ago

Up North

I struggle so much that I need to wank myself to sleep every night

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