FabSwingers.com forum: Funniest local update right now

By *hil most chill OP Man
50 weeks ago

South East & Europe

Share your funniest local update.

For me it is

"I’ve decided to be a lesbian men are time wasters from dating to sex. All wasting my time I’m like bye !! So only women message me"

It's cool that sexuality is so easy to choose, like selecting the difficulty in a videogame

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By *iss.BellaWoman
50 weeks ago

Wales

This one guy who's very horny and just needs one lady to come and bounce on him and leave a good verification

he promises they won't be disappointed.

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By *ruceyyMan
50 weeks ago

London

"This one guy who's very horny and just needs one lady to come and bounce on him and leave a good verification

he promises they won't be disappointed. "

Is that me? I feel attacked

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By *iasubTV/TS
50 weeks ago

Ilkeston

"This one guy who's very horny and just needs one lady to come and bounce on him and leave a good verification

he promises they won't be disappointed. "

That is an offer one cant turn down

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By *iss.BellaWoman
50 weeks ago

Wales

"This one guy who's very horny and just needs one lady to come and bounce on him and leave a good verification

he promises they won't be disappointed.

Is that me? I feel attacked

Oops, sorry

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man
50 weeks ago

BRIDPORT

"This one guy who's very horny and just needs one lady to come and bounce on him and leave a good verification

he promises they won't be disappointed. "

What are you waiting for?

This could be your lucky day

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By *ake and BeckyCouple
50 weeks ago

Gravesend

No funny ones, just lots of terrible grammar and spelling.

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By *r TriomanMan
50 weeks ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

Not a funny update but this rang true for me:

"Giving a lovely sensual massage is almost as rewarding as receiving one. Almost!!

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By *he MinionMan
50 weeks ago

None that are funny. Just the usual cryptic, thanks for a great night/weekend/hour, 30 seconds, you know who you are type stuff.

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By *rispyDuckMan
50 weeks ago

Chinese Takeaway near you

[Removed by poster at 04/03/24 08:50:42]

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By *rispyDuckMan
50 weeks ago

Chinese Takeaway near you

Locked herself out the house in just her nightie, now cold and horny standing by the door lol

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By *he MinionMan
50 weeks ago

"No funny ones, just lots of terrible grammar and spelling. "

Soz, ill delet mine know

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By *iss.BellaWoman
50 weeks ago

Wales

"This one guy who's very horny and just needs one lady to come and bounce on him and leave a good verification

he promises they won't be disappointed.

What are you waiting for?

This could be your lucky day

Already messaged him

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By *abtastic Mr FoxMan
50 weeks ago

A den in the Glen

It was taken down a day or so ago..

"Legs are staying firmly shut for now thanks to a dirty cock. If you say your cock is clean, make sure it is!"

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
50 weeks ago

Glasgow / London

I spotted one here saying she recognised so many people’s pics on Fab that “it’s like the Tinder bargain basement”.

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By *ruceyyMan
50 weeks ago

London

"This one guy who's very horny and just needs one lady to come and bounce on him and leave a good verification

he promises they won't be disappointed.

Is that me? I feel attacked

Oops, sorry

To be fair I would just really like great sex myself. That's all! That's all!

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By *hil most chill OP Man
50 weeks ago

South East & Europe

"It was taken down a day or so ago..

"Legs are staying firmly shut for now thanks to a dirty cock. If you say your cock is clean, make sure it is!""

This is absolute gold. Why would anyone want to overshare like this??

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
50 weeks ago

Glasgow / London

"To be fair I would just really like great sex by myself. That's all! That's all!

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By *hil most chill OP Man
50 weeks ago

South East & Europe

"This one guy who's very horny and just needs one lady to come and bounce on him and leave a good verification

he promises they won't be disappointed. "

Honestly this sounds like a once in a lifetime opportunity for a lucky lady. Any lady by the sound of it. I imagine he's balls deep right now!

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By *ruceyyMan
50 weeks ago

London

"To be fair I would just really like great sex by myself. That's all! That's all!

I decided I couldn't stoop any lower so it's all guns blazin now!

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By *oiluvfunMan
50 weeks ago

Camden

“Come and spunk in wife’s knickers now”

I mean; I can’t do it ‘now’ because it will take me 45 minutes to get there, so I’ll be too late……

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By *oiluvfunMan
50 weeks ago

Camden

"This one guy who's very horny and just needs one lady to come and bounce on him and leave a good verification

he promises they won't be disappointed.

Honestly this sounds like a once in a lifetime opportunity for a lucky lady. Any lady by the sound of it. I imagine he's balls deep right now!"

Well; you know how easy it is for a guy to find women in Fab……

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By *oiluvfunMan
50 weeks ago

Camden

"It was taken down a day or so ago..

"Legs are staying firmly shut for now thanks to a dirty cock. If you say your cock is clean, make sure it is!""

Omg! She didn’t suck it first? Amateur…..

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
50 weeks ago

Central

So many keepers here, if only they were local.

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

"Women getting an attitude cause they want to see you is a real thing."

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By *ittleMissMinionWoman
50 weeks ago

La La Land

I've got some interesting ones this morning

'Breakfast out'

'Stunt cock available for your pleasure'

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By *TG3Man
50 weeks ago

Dorchester

None of mine are funny

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By *inister_SpinsterWoman
50 weeks ago

Manchester(ish).

I love a rummage through my local updates, there's always something to make me chuckle.

Aside from the horny now, fun now, and explicit sex toy vs gentials pictures.

There's a guy looking for a window fitter.

Of all the places to seek someone to sort your fixtures, I can't imagine using fab for this.

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By *hil most chill OP Man
50 weeks ago

South East & Europe

There was a series of comical updates from a woman asking to borrow someone's PS5 for 2 weeks

Then there were a few annoyed posts ranting how guys kept letting her down regarding the PS5. I couldn't resist posting a status saying how I was enjoying playing my PS5

Apparently she's now playing Final Fantasy so this one seems to have a happy ending.

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By *he MinionMan
50 weeks ago

"There was a series of comical updates from a woman asking to borrow someone's PS5 for 2 weeks

Then there were a few annoyed posts ranting how guys kept letting her down regarding the PS5. I couldn't resist posting a status saying how I was enjoying playing my PS5

Apparently she's now playing Final Fantasy so this one seems to have a happy ending."

Wonder if it will be returned after the 2 weeks ?

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By *ravelling_WilburyMan
50 weeks ago

Beverley

Amongst some absolutely turgid photos was this beauty

"Looking for some one to pretend to be a insurance broker for life insurance to come to mind tomorrow night for some fun"

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By *hil most chill OP Man
50 weeks ago

South East & Europe

"There was a series of comical updates from a woman asking to borrow someone's PS5 for 2 weeks

Then there were a few annoyed posts ranting how guys kept letting her down regarding the PS5. I couldn't resist posting a status saying how I was enjoying playing my PS5

Apparently she's now playing Final Fantasy so this one seems to have a happy ending.

Wonder if it will be returned after the 2 weeks ?"

I will keep you updated!

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