FabSwingers.com forum: What is a British phrase that sounds rude but is perfectly innocent

By *usman 199 OP Man
49 weeks ago

Stockport

Been there Done that

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By (user no longer on site)
49 weeks ago

Did ye, aye?

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By *eyond PurityCouple
49 weeks ago

Lincolnshire

Put wood in t' hole

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By *lexm87Man
49 weeks ago

Various

At which point, the member rose in the chamber to discuss their early day motion.

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By *elix SightedMan
49 weeks ago

Cloud 8

She had a leaky flange

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By *ympha LuxuriaWoman
49 weeks ago

La La Land

Bus wanker

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By *aomilatteCouple
49 weeks ago

Midlands

Pork in Cider

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
49 weeks ago

ashford

Ha ha! Going away next Monday to a hotel where they have everything on offer! Pools sauna archery boules etc ! Also massages and facials! I sent my sister who I'm going with a txt just now saying u can have a facial! She won't have a clue to its naughty meaning! She's not read it yet! Looking forward to her reply!

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By *urnedoutniceagainMan
49 weeks ago

louth

They dont like it up em!

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By *tormchasingCouple
49 weeks ago

Essex

"Keep your pecker up". Apparently people used to say this without a hint of innuendo

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By (user no longer on site)
49 weeks ago

Something about crumpets

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By *viatrixWoman
49 weeks ago

Redhill

On my first job here in the UK, 20 years ago, someone at the next desk asked if I had a rubber they could borrow. I was shocked.

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By *urnedoutniceagainMan
49 weeks ago

louth

I need to take down your particulars

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By (user no longer on site)
49 weeks ago

We should have a mass debate together

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By *urnedoutniceagainMan
49 weeks ago

louth

There’s something about you but I can’t put my finger on it

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By *ardhatCharlieMan
49 weeks ago

Northwest

Pop it around the back

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By *elix SightedMan
49 weeks ago

Cloud 8

When you come over, use the back passage

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By (user no longer on site)
49 weeks ago

Once saw a strip club that had a note on the front door saying

Entrance at rear

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By *abtastic Mr FoxMan
49 weeks ago

A den in the Glen

"Did you ever come across her at all?"

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By *rucking-HellMan
49 weeks ago

Northampton

Spare us a fag?

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man
49 weeks ago

BRIDPORT

""Keep your pecker up". Apparently people used to say this without a hint of innuendo

Keep up your pecker with a Cadburys double decker

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By *elvet RopeMan
49 weeks ago

by the big field

In your best Leslie Phillips voice

‘I say! Would you like a large portion of spotted dick?’

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By *TG3Man
49 weeks ago

Dorchester

Would you mind spreading those for me

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By *ad HardcoreMan
49 weeks ago

A Chippy Near You...

Stiff Upper Lip

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By *r_reusMan
49 weeks ago

Coventry

Fag.

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By (user no longer on site)
49 weeks ago

It's squeaky bum time

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By (user no longer on site)
49 weeks ago

"Spare us a fag?"

I think "can I bum a fag" sounds worse

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By *ad HardcoreMan
49 weeks ago

A Chippy Near You...

"Spare us a fag?

I think "can I bum a fag" sounds worse

100% agree.

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By *rixie_BlondeWoman
49 weeks ago

London (She/Her)

Dry riser inlet

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By *aomilatteCouple
49 weeks ago

Midlands

On a hot summers day who doesn't like a barbecue and a spit roast?

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By *r X46Man
49 weeks ago

Liverpool

My sister in law once told me how she loved a good facial when she went to the beauty spa.

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By (user no longer on site)
49 weeks ago

Come on yer fat dick, I'll walk you to the station.

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By (user no longer on site)
49 weeks ago

"On a hot summers day who doesn't like a barbecue and a spit roast?

Not me!

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By *ad HardcoreMan
49 weeks ago

A Chippy Near You...

"On a hot summers day who doesn't like a barbecue and a spit roast?

The very term 'spit roast'...always makes me smirk

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By (user no longer on site)
49 weeks ago

What an absolute cockup!

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By *lirtyAndFunCouple
49 weeks ago

Rushden

When a cockny man asks if,

"he may enter your home?"

but it comes out as,

"can i cum in ya ars?"

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By *rucking-HellMan
48 weeks ago

Northampton

Got any crusty bloomers for sale luv?

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By *oupleus30Couple
48 weeks ago

Minster

Moist

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By *ischief in mindMan
48 weeks ago

Woking

They're coming in hot!

I do like a good shagpile

Up at the crack of dawn.

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By *onjonjon44Man
48 weeks ago

sheffield

Faggots for lunch?

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By *ynamicnatureMan
48 weeks ago

Doncaster

""Keep your pecker up". Apparently people used to say this without a hint of innuendo

"
well a pecker means dick over in Oz and that's where I was raised,

so when I first arrived into the UK, I was staying at my brothers place in London with his partner and mother in-law.

We were all in the kitchen together and I was talking about finding a job and my own pad.

The mother in-law just put her hand on my shoulder and said "you keep your pecker up", and she said it without batting an eyelid.

I turned as red as a beatroot

I couldn't believe those words just came out of that sweet old ladies mouth.

My sister in law could see how embarrassed I was and burst out laughing.

Still makes me have a chuckle to myself when I think about it

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By *ad HardcoreMan
48 weeks ago

A Chippy Near You...

...

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