FabSwingers.com forum: Outercourse. It's not always penetration

By (user no longer on site) OP
39 weeks ago

Outercourse" includes kissing, touching, erotic massage and using sex toys specifically intended towards satisfying a woman sexually.

Many of us equate "sex" with "intercourse" and use those words interchangeably. Yet highly satisfying sex doesn't have to be limited to penetration -- and doesn't even have to include it at all.

It's important that we get out of porno view towards sex, where a woman gives blowjob and then gets fucked hard.

Realistic sex should also include foreplay, sensual play, tantric experiences, going down on a woman gentle (not with grinding teeth) and able to play with her using our tongue and fingers. Many women achieve better orgasms when sex includes such acts.

I think it's important that these discussions happen that men learn not to just think from their horny dicks but also from a sensual mindset of making sure the woman enjoys equally and 360 degree.

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By *eliWoman
39 weeks ago

I do get what you're saying OP, really I do. Regardless of gender, sex should be a mutually enjoyable experience for everyone.

I don't particularly care for the term foreplay - I use it because it's easier for shared understanding but it's quite a heteronormative term isn't it? Fore... for what? Penetrative sex?

What about women enjoying women? I don't consider oral, mutual masturbation etc foreplay then. Anyway, it's an interesting post on a Saturday morning!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
39 weeks ago

Thank you for your comment. Unfortunately English is not my first or even second language so I might have used terms that are not neutral for which I apologize. But indeed I intend the more neutral way to the experiences people have irrespective of the genders involved.

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By *ellinever70Woman
39 weeks ago

Ayrshire

It's a little condescending to all those that are happily enjoying their sex life

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By *sWyldWoman
39 weeks ago

Edinburgh

There is a whole spectrum of fuckery to me. From the flirtation, kissing, touch, seduction, exploration, massage, oral, right through to intercourse in all it's forms, group sex, gangbangs, an orgy and everything in between.

I really don't care much for labels or to ever challenge what others do or don't enjoy.

So long as the person /people I'm with at the time are mutually involved and having a great time, then that's what matters.

Pleasure comes in many forms and I want to indulge in, explore and enjoy it all.

I don't want to be limited.

Sometimes I can get just as much pleasure from kissing the right person as I could from them actually being inside me.

Sometimes I want slow, sensual and intense, probably akin to making love and sometimes I need to be fuck hard.

And sometimes I want both in the same session.

There's no right or wrong. It's about feeling our way, reading reactions and communication. With a whole lot of chemistry, passion and enthusiasm thrown in.

I think sometimes people inadvertently judge what others do and some things are deemed boring. The whole concept of "vanilla" for example.

However what's vanilla to one, may not be to someone else.

What's deemed kinky or hard-core etc to you or I might not be to others.

It's all about perspective.

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By *allySlinkyWoman
39 weeks ago

Leeds

"It's a little condescending to all those that are happily enjoying their sex life "

I didn't find it condescending

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By *a LunaWoman
39 weeks ago

South Wales

I’ve had some great sensual fun with my clothes on. I do like teasing a fella’s cock through clothing. The obvious wet patch brings me joy.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
39 weeks ago

Leeds

The actual sex is probably the thing we do least, oral, mutual masterbation, facial general foreplay we do much more than the sex.

Mrs

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
39 weeks ago

Manchester-ish

I think you're mainly preaching to the converted on here.

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By *asques and boxersCouple
39 weeks ago

Ashford and dept16

"Outercourse" includes kissing, touching, erotic massage and using sex toys specifically intended towards satisfying a woman sexually.

Many of us equate "sex" with "intercourse" and use those words interchangeably. Yet highly satisfying sex doesn't have to be limited to penetration -- and doesn't even have to include it at all.

It's important that we get out of porno view towards sex, where a woman gives blowjob and then gets fucked hard.

I think it's important that these discussions happen that men learn not to just think from their horny dicks but also from a sensual mindset of making sure the woman enjoys equally and 360 degree. "

Oh my goodness another new title whats wrong with simple Soft Swing! We've used that discription for 12 years.

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man
39 weeks ago

BRIDPORT

Foreplay?

Is that the bit when you dig her in the ribs and say ‘hey, wake-up, I’ve got a hardon’.

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By *oodmessMan
39 weeks ago

yumsville

I think it honestly depends what you like at any given point in time.

You try being over loverboy on a woman and you come across greasy. Try being over pushy and you're too forceful. Whichever in-between works, works. There's plenty to do but what someone likes one minute they wont necessarily like the next.

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By *hief_Of_AlwaysMan
39 weeks ago

London or Bedford

Dya know what I miss?

Dry Fucking

Ain’t done that on yeeeaaars

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
39 weeks ago

North East Scotland, mostly

"There is a whole spectrum of fuckery to me. From the flirtation, kissing, touch, seduction, exploration, massage, oral, right through to intercourse in all it's forms, group sex, gangbangs, an orgy and everything in between.

I really don't care much for labels or to ever challenge what others do or don't enjoy.

So long as the person /people I'm with at the time are mutually involved and having a great time, then that's what matters.

Pleasure comes in many forms and I want to indulge in, explore and enjoy it all.

I don't want to be limited.

Sometimes I can get just as much pleasure from kissing the right person as I could from them actually being inside me.

Sometimes I want slow, sensual and intense, probably akin to making love and sometimes I need to be fuck hard.

And sometimes I want both in the same session.

There's no right or wrong. It's about feeling our way, reading reactions and communication. With a whole lot of chemistry, passion and enthusiasm thrown in.

I think sometimes people inadvertently judge what others do and some things are deemed boring. The whole concept of "vanilla" for example.

However what's vanilla to one, may not be to someone else.

What's deemed kinky or hard-core etc to you or I might not be to others.

It's all about perspective.

All of this! Beautifully put

Mrs TMN x

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By *allySlinkyWoman
39 weeks ago

Leeds

" general foreplay "

Reporting for duty General Foreplay !

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
39 weeks ago

in Lancashire

"It's a little condescending to all those that are happily enjoying their sex life "

Why?

It's not going to influence you or us, it's just an opinion..

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By (user no longer on site) OP
39 weeks ago

Thanks to everyone for their opinion. Very wise and good points by most of you. And indeed , it's just an opinion I shared. It's definitely not for everyone and everyone have their own taste and interest. In the end people involved consent to what makes them happy and good. That's more important. Apologies if anyone felt hurt by my opinion.

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
39 weeks ago

Glasgow / London

"All of this! Beautifully put

Mrs TMN x"

She’s very good, isn’t she?

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By *esmdMan
39 weeks ago

Woodhall Spa

I mostly finger fuck the mrs these days

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