FabSwingers.com forum: Effort not included?

By (user no longer on site) OP
39 weeks ago

If someone offered to meet you and said they’re happy for you NOT to make an effort with your appearance/glam up/smarten up etc

Would you? Could you?

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By *loomy GirlWoman
39 weeks ago

leicester

Would make me wonder if they were gonna put any thought into making an effort. Wouldn’t want to turn up and they’d not even showered or something

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By *avexxMan
39 weeks ago

cheshire

nope,,

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By *ris GrayMan
39 weeks ago

Dorchester

No effort no me

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By *hil most chillMan
39 weeks ago

South East & Europe

Seems like an odd thing to say. There's a standard amount of effort I'll always put in regardless, would be weird if someone was happy with me putting no effort in.

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By *rHotNottsMan
39 weeks ago

Dubai & Nottingham

If someone said that it would be a red flag to me, like they are a real slob or desperate

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By (user no longer on site) OP
39 weeks ago

To be clear if asking if you would meet someone who says YOU don’t need to make a big effort.

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By *eliWoman
39 weeks ago

I think they'd be trying to make me feel comfortable or relaxed or similar and could appreciate the intent behind it. Like a kind of 'hey you don't need to make all that effort for me'. Sweet but I'm not going to listen to it.

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

That would sound very odd, if someone said that to me.

Suppose I wouldn’t need to iron my shirt, which is a bonus

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

That would ring alarm bells, I would be concerned what they are going to turn up looking like.

It would be unquestionable to meet someone without making an effort, I just couldn’t do that even if asked.

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By *ellinever70Woman
39 weeks ago

Ayrshire

I'd think they were just a little bit awkward and trying too hard

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By *andynecklaceWoman
39 weeks ago

West Brom

That's quite strange and I'd make an effort anyway

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By *ellhungvweMan
39 weeks ago

Cheltenham

"I think they'd be trying to make me feel comfortable or relaxed or similar and could appreciate the intent behind it. Like a kind of 'hey you don't need to make all that effort for me'. Sweet but I'm not going to listen to it.

That’s what I would mean if I said it - basically I want you to be comfortable rather than spend hours on something you do really want to do. If you want to spend hours because it makes you comfortable then

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By *ily WhiteWoman
39 weeks ago

It depends, I've been on social meets in the past that were hikes in the countryside - obviously I wasn't going to go to those all glammed up. I've always gone to meets dressed appropriately for the venue and/or activity, but there's always been an underlying standard of showered and ironed.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
39 weeks ago

East Sussex

No, I couldn't. I apply lipstick to take the rubbish out

The effort I'm making is as much for me as them so we probably wouldn't be compatible.

That said I did agree to leave my tiara and opera gloves at home once.

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

There's a difference between looking clean and tidy or being glammed up. I'd assume they meant the former. Fine with me. I'm not the glam up type.

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

Definitely not that’s a red flag right there ugh

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

I couldn’t. I wouldn’t feel as confident as I would putting an effort into my appearance.

Plus, I’m sure he would quickly regret saying that when I turn up

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By *agneto.Man
39 weeks ago

Bham

I certainly appreciate the effort and wouldn't discourage it.

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
39 weeks ago

chichester

"If someone offered to meet you and said they’re happy for you NOT to make an effort with your appearance/glam up/smarten up etc

Would you? Could you? "
m

Absolutely

I rarely doll up for social meets anyway

When I goto clubs I rarely bother with any makeup etc as I like saunas / hot tubs

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By *eekyMan
39 weeks ago

Perton

Maybe they're wanting to connect with the raw unpretentious person under any facades we may usually display, however over or understated.

Assuming they're clean, I imagine it could be an interesting psychological experience.

However if you turn up and they're dolled up, they're a cunt.

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By *rill PhilMan
39 weeks ago

Crediton

I never expect anyone to make an effort for me but, I would always make some kind of effort.

I might not wear a suit but, I also wouldn't show up to a meet wearing baggies and a t-shirt!

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By *a LunaWoman
39 weeks ago

South Wales

I’d say ok! What time do you want me?!

I would wash my fanny though. Even I have my slovenly limit.

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By *inochioMan
39 weeks ago

Derbyshire

I just wouldnt occur to me to not make an effort. Call me old fashioned but thats how i was brought up. Have respect for myself and others. Sadly lacking in todays supposedly enlightened and modern society.

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

"I’d say ok! What time do you want me?!

I would wash my fanny though. Even I have my slovenly limit."

I love your style

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By *otSoPoshWoman
39 weeks ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

I make an effort regardless of what they say. But I make it for me.

I mean... it might not be a good effort, or impress anybody, but I try.

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

Glad I don't have too

The joys of being ugly

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

"If someone offered to meet you and said they’re happy for you NOT to make an effort with your appearance/glam up/smarten up etc

Would you? Could you? "

Nooo I find it a HUGE turn off. There’s been a few times when I’ve told people I can’t meet “right now” because I need to have a shower. It’s gross the amount of people who say “that doesn’t matter. Just come”.

Instant turn off! Would never meet anyone that’s happy to meet others with poor hygiene etc. grim.

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago

"If someone offered to meet you and said they’re happy for you NOT to make an effort with your appearance/glam up/smarten up etc

Would you? Could you? "

I once had a meet where I definitely made the effort. Guy rocked up wearing a well worn tee shirt, cargo shorts amd sliders. I was not impressed and told him so and drove off!

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By *inAndTonic21Couple
39 weeks ago

Merseyside

It’s nice when someone says they just like you as you are but we always make an effort for each other or for events so why not for a meet?

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
39 weeks ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"If someone offered to meet you and said they’re happy for you NOT to make an effort with your appearance/glam up/smarten up etc

Would you? Could you? "

Do I already know this person though?

Good friends? It wouldn't bother me at all what they wore. I've met some straight from their work in all manner of clothing.

A first time meet with someone would be different. Not necessarily going all out as if was compulsory to be wearing their best lingerie and a dress, but smart casual at the minimum. First impressions are generally quite important.

That said. I'd want them to be 100% comfortable in whatever they decided to wear rather than stressing about it.

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By *929Man
39 weeks ago

newcastle

Being male there is really zero difference between making an effort and not, I have to put clothes on to leave the house anyways and bathing regular is something everyone should do regardless of meeting or not hsha

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By *mf123Man
39 weeks ago

with one foot out the door

I dont make an effort anyway my mentality was take me as i am or il do something else with my day

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
39 weeks ago

chichester

"I’d say ok! What time do you want me?!

I would wash my fanny though. Even I have my slovenly limit."

If it’s a social you don’t need to

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By *ittle miss sunshineWoman
39 weeks ago

south sheilds

I’d be more than happy to meet I hate having to find something to wear every day. I’ve got tons of clothes that I know I look sexy in.

If they say don’t put effort in then I won’t

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