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"I can injure myself just laying in bed
...next..."Don't grab it so hard next time and you wouldn't have....  | |||
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"I can laugh, sneeze, cough, fart and shit my pants at the same time......it's an artform" ...ha....never done that....ahem  | |||
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"We have to warn out knees we are going upstairs"
I make 'ooh'and 'ah' noises getting out of bed | |||
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"[Removed by poster at 19/02/24 20:21:23]" Cartilage removed by poster | |||
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 luckily kneeling is okay | |||
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"I didn't warn my knees screamed in pain and pressed delete by mistake " I feel your pain. Tying shoelaces is a bugger as well | |||
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"I tripped doing the light fantastic "Fall in to my arms you luscious Welsh raven  | |||
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"I can't wait to hit 50. Sounds epic! "Wait until you hit 51! Free sanatogen on tap  | |||
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"Proud to say I have never tripled crowned on parade " Ten Guinness and a few southern comforts should sort that | |||
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"of course I'm going to put on a cardigan to put out the bins." A fine mohair one for a lady of your class | |||
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"of course I'm going to put on a cardigan to put out the bins. A fine mohair one for a lady of your class "Naturally | |||
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"Snapped my banjo string when partner got to rough! " Go easy.....your skin loses elasticity | |||
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"of course I'm going to put on a cardigan to put out the bins. A fine mohair one for a lady of your class
Naturally "I bet you donned your high heels too | |||
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"I’ve just realised have been wearing my tee shirt inside out all day. " I got undressed the other day and realised I’d had my boxers on back to front all day  | |||
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"I’ve just realised have been wearing my tee shirt inside out all day. I got undressed the other day and realised I’d had my boxers on back to front all day "As long as there was no skiddies, all good | |||
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"I’ve just realised have been wearing my tee shirt inside out all day. I got undressed the other day and realised I’d had my boxers on back to front all day
As long as there was no skiddies, all good "Hardly any. But they were on the outside (it was day two) | |||
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"I’ve just realised have been wearing my tee shirt inside out all day. I got undressed the other day and realised I’d had my boxers on back to front all day
As long as there was no skiddies, all good
Hardly any. But they were on the outside (it was day two)"Plenty of wear in those yet fella | |||
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"If you sneeze with your mouth open do your teeth fly out? " You're presuming they're false. Trick is not to bite your tongue and fart at the same time | |||
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"If you sneeze with your mouth open do your teeth fly out? You're presuming they're false. Trick is not to bite your tongue and fart at the same time " and to never trust a fart | |||
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"If you sneeze with your mouth open do your teeth fly out? You're presuming they're false. Trick is not to bite your tongue and fart at the same time
and to never trust a fart"If it feels wrong, check, quickly | |||
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"I’m gen z, of course I don’t ask to speak to a manager " I'm a manager. What's gen z?  | |||
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"My knees click going up the stairs" If they make a tune, I'm interested | |||
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"My knees click going up the stairs If they make a tune, I'm interested "depends how fast or slow I go up the stairs | |||
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"My knees click going up the stairs If they make a tune, I'm interested depends how fast or slow I go up the stairs"Make it sound like Baby D or the Prodigy and it's a date | |||
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"My knees click going up the stairs If they make a tune, I'm interested depends how fast or slow I go up the stairs"Guess I'm lucky I live on the ground level now so I don't have that problem lol | |||
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"I fell out of bed. Sober." tha't ll teach ya. | |||
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"No one ever told me you have to start shaving inside your nose" And ears. Pesky bastards | |||
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"I can injure myself just laying in bed
...next..."The best tunes come from the 80’s! | |||
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"No one ever told me you have to start shaving inside your nose" Aw man, shouldn’t have said, need some stuff to keep those in their forties on their toes | |||
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"Not quite 50, but able to click joints randomly and audibly." Like a pair of castanets. Viva espana you red fox | |||
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"I’m gen z, of course I don’t ask to speak to a manager I'm a manager. What's gen z? "No idea. I got up to millennials. | |||
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"Slip.on sketchers.. !!!!!!" Comfort before style. Now get a Volvo | |||
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"I check my front door 3 times to make sure I've locked it, even though the key is still in my hand " Waggle that handle | |||
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"Not quite 50, but able to click joints randomly and audibly. Like a pair of castanets. Viva espana you red fox " | |||
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"I now have youngsters bombarding my inbox with "Mummy" fantasies "
Come on over to mine and we can do your fantasies | |||
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"I now have youngsters bombarding my inbox with "Mummy" fantasies "Hey, kiddies, leave the lady alone! | |||
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"I now have youngsters bombarding my inbox with "Mummy" fantasies
Come on over to mine and we can do your fantasies "As long as you promise never to call me any parental derivative | |||
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"I now have youngsters bombarding my inbox with "Mummy" fantasies
Come on over to mine and we can do your fantasies
As long as you promise never to call me any parental derivative "Grandma? | |||
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"I now have youngsters bombarding my inbox with "Mummy" fantasies
Come on over to mine and we can do your fantasies
As long as you promise never to call me any parental derivative
Grandma? "Being under 50, means I can still tell you to go fuck yourself, tho, rigght? | |||
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"I now have youngsters bombarding my inbox with "Mummy" fantasies
Come on over to mine and we can do your fantasies
As long as you promise never to call me any parental derivative "ew I promise | |||
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"I now have youngsters bombarding my inbox with "Mummy" fantasies
Come on over to mine and we can do your fantasies
As long as you promise never to call me any parental derivative
Grandma?
Being under 50, means I can still tell you to go fuck yourself, tho, rigght? "I'd rather you did something else to me | |||
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"I'm over 50 and can't figure out why I leave my phone in the fridge when I make a cuppa "Do you leave the milk out | |||
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"I'm over 50 and can't figure out why I leave my phone in the fridge when I make a cuppa
Do you leave the milk out "Just had to check.... I don't have milk in Earl Grey, or so my carer says.. | |||
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"This is like the anti-sexy thread "Maybe, at over 50, not being sexy is the new sexy ?? | |||
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"Wehey!!! I think I've just pulled..... Another muscle whilst typing.. "That's all I can pull I'm good at that lol | |||
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"I’m gen z, of course I don’t ask to speak to a manager I'm a manager. What's gen z? "The terms Gen X, Gen Y, Gen Z, and Gen Alpha refer to different generations of people. The years of birth for each generation are as follows: Baby Boomers: Born from 1946 to 1964. Gen X: Born from 1965 to 1980. Gen Y: Born from 1981 to 1996. Gen Z: Born from 1997 to 2012. Also called millennials Gen Alpha: Born from early 2010s to 2025. I have cricked me neck in bed asleep, because some numpty had a car crash on the other side of the estate, and that land bang woke me up with a really bad jolt. | |||
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"This is like the anti-sexy thread "So, why are you here? | |||
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