FabSwingers.com forum: Fate??

By *essaMay OP Woman
47 weeks ago

Fairytale Wood

It is funny how conversations and comments can trigger thoughts also helped by a couple of proseccos, so.

Is our fate predetermined? or do or do we actually determine our own fates? Are we truly masters of our own destiny?

People thinking OMG on a Friday. Anyway the thought came about looking at major turning points in my life. If they were put there to ultimately put me on the path I'm on, my fate!!

Major turning points and events:

My first sexual encounter with another woman.

Walking out on a very bad marriage.

Meeting a guy who helped me discover my strength, my self awareness helped me become the person I really am.

Into what seems to be so far a perfect friendship with another woman.

All those years ago I could never imagined or considered.

No right or wrong, just interested in peoples thoughts and discussions

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By *rozac_fairyCouple
47 weeks ago

Birmingham

I like to think fate isn't determined for us. Otherwise wow, so many people literally just destined to suffer awfully and live a life of trauma.

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By *ags73Man
47 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

“As Merlin always taught us, is inexorable. Life is a jest of the Gods, Merlin liked to claim, and there is no justice. You must learn to laugh, he once told me, or else you'll just weep yourself to death.”

Bernard Cornwell

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
47 weeks ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

I think it's actually a mix.

Yes, in many ways you can try to determine your own fate through your actions. Often this works, sometimes it doesn't of course.

But there are times when your fate is absolutely beyond your control and steered by the actions and decisions of others, with no input or sway from yourself. Change can come out of the blue and be so unexpected that it hits you for six.

Accepting that sometimes things happen in life that are not what you expected, wanted or ever thought may occur can be a struggle and extremely difficult.

It's what you do when fate deals you those cards that is important and how you move on.

Nothing us ever guaranteed in life. You'll experience the good and the bad. That's reality and it's important to recognise that.

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By *ellhungvweMan
47 weeks ago

Cheltenham

"I think it's actually a mix.

Yes, in many ways you can try to determine your own fate through your actions. Often this works, sometimes it doesn't of course.

Accepting that sometimes things happen in life that are not what you expected, wanted or ever thought may occur can be a struggle and extremely difficult.

It's what you do when fate deals you those cards that is important and how you move on.

Nothing us ever guaranteed in life. You'll experience the good and the bad. That's reality and it's important to recognise that. "

I agree with this. The world works in probabilities and you can often change those probabilities towards where you want to go but chance still happens and you have to prepare for that.

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By *elix SightedMan
47 weeks ago

Cloud 8

Complex area, this. My thoughts:

There is no such thing as fate or destiny, just what happens based on the most intricate model of human behaviour.

Firstly, nature means I am predisposed to certain traits and actions. Then nurture moulds my personality and behaviour.

Then an infinite number of interdependencies determine what happens to me in a daily basis. ie if I leave the house now and drive to town, nothing occurs outside my plan. But if I leave it five minutes then leave the house, I encounter someone that crashes into my car. Fate? No. It wasn’t ‘meant’ to happen, it’s just random. And an infinite number of possibilities led to that person being there at that time, and the same for them to an infinite degree.

We can influence our lives by making specific decisions ie who to date, where to go, which job to pursue etc, but we don’t end up doing ‘what we were always supposed to do’.

Life and human interaction is fascinating. Much is in our control, much is set by our genes and upbringing, everything else is determined by an infinite number of random events.

I believe people use fate as an explanation because it’s easy. With 6 billion people in the world, there cannot be a grand plan.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
47 weeks ago

East Sussex

Fate as in our lives are predestined? That would be some complicated spreadsheet wouldn't it.

I think it's random chance influenced very slightly by our personalities and other people.

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By *TG3Man
47 weeks ago

Dorchester

"It is funny how conversations and comments can trigger thoughts also helped by a couple of proseccos, so.

Is our fate predetermined? or do or do we actually determine our own fates? Are we truly masters of our own destiny?

People thinking OMG on a Friday. Anyway the thought came about looking at major turning points in my life. If they were put there to ultimately put me on the path I'm on, my fate!!

Major turning points and events:

My first sexual encounter with another woman.

Walking out on a very bad marriage.

Meeting a guy who helped me discover my strength, my self awareness helped me become the person I really am.

Into what seems to be so far a perfect friendship with another woman.

All those years ago I could never imagined or considered.

No right or wrong, just interested in peoples thoughts and discussions

"
You definitely shape your own destiny, i left my job today and it hasn't phased me one bit in fact its a relief summers coming and i shall look forward to that

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
47 weeks ago

Reading

Its very very complicated. So many factors play into everything we do. Our subconcious probably interferes far more than we think. Free will is an illusion.

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By *ags73Man
47 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

Can’t cheat death. Can’t undo things you’ve done good or bad.

Got to make the best of every minute of every day, there’s not another now.

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By *essaMay OP Woman
47 weeks ago

Fairytale Wood

Loving all the responses,like seeing different takes. They say that all myths and legends have some foundation in truth. Fates etc.

Line in a film i watched the other day "You are where you are meant to be" won't say the film as don't want to give any spoilers.

I could descibe my current friendship, but as things unravel (not just clothes

) it was a chance meeting by the beach, one could say completely random? Why this person? Am i where I'm supposed to be?

Just postulating and no not a euphemism for some sexual act

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
47 weeks ago

ashford

Great belive in fate! X

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By *eavilMan
47 weeks ago

Stalybridge

Does a belief in fate mean that no matter what we do the end result will always be the same? Seems a bit defeatist.

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By (user no longer on site)
47 weeks ago

Oh i find it a fascinating topic, both frustrating and aha moments.... I genuinely believe if its meant to be, it will be at some stage

I often wonder how much we can control and how much is pre-determined.. And then with all the twists and turns we take on the way - do we end up where we were planned to be all along?!

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By *antricSeeker60Man
47 weeks ago

Durham

The concept of whether fate is predetermined or not remains a subject of philosophical debate with no definitive answer. Different corners and all that.

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By *essaMay OP Woman
47 weeks ago

Fairytale Wood

"Oh i find it a fascinating topic, both frustrating and aha moments.... I genuinely believe if its meant to be, it will be at some stage

I often wonder how much we can control and how much is pre-determined.. And then with all the twists and turns we take on the way - do we end up where we were planned to be all along?! "

Exactly this ^^ i listed 4 key events in which in my view i see as completely changed my life. There have been many twist and turns, sorrow and happiness along the way, but were they just preparing me for what fate has planned? Is this just another key event

. Is what fate has planned something to be worried about? Just my ponderings.

It is all philosophical i know but in everyones lives can you find key moments that could have been put there, you know the chances off?

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By *ora the explorerWoman
47 weeks ago

Paradise, Herts

"Complex area, this. My thoughts:

There is no such thing as fate or destiny, just what happens based on the most intricate model of human behaviour.

Firstly, nature means I am predisposed to certain traits and actions. Then nurture moulds my personality and behaviour.

We can influence our lives by making specific decisions ie who to date, where to go, which job to pursue etc, but we don’t end up doing ‘what we were always supposed to do’.

Life and human interaction is fascinating. Much is in our control, much is set by our genes and upbringing, everything else is determined by an infinite number of random events.

I believe people use fate as an explanation because it’s easy. With 6 billion people in the world, there cannot be a grand plan."

I can’t say it any better than this ^^

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
47 weeks ago

Central

There's no magical fate force and path, as far as I'm inclined to view life.

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By *batMan
47 weeks ago

Alicante, Spain. (Sometimes in Wales)

I can’t get behind the “everything happens for a reason”

There’s 8 billion people on the planet, (not 6 sorry!). All of them making choices, so think of the mathematical permutations of that.

There’s maths and physics, then there’s biology and culture. I think it all comes from there rather than a big plan for anyone.

You can make reasoned choices, but chance will also play a part. (Often the result of someone else’s reasoned choices!).

Gbat

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