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By *eli OP   Woman
42 weeks ago

.

working.

Let's say you received that from a fellow Fabber. How would you respond/feel?

How would you tell someone it's not working?

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By *heGateKeeperMan
42 weeks ago

Stratford

I would respect the honesty. Sometimes it just doesn’t work, despite how much you (both) might want it to.

You just have to be grown up and respectful about it and decide if there’s any chance that it’s salvageable, or whether to cut ties, hug and wish each other the best

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago

No right or wrong way.

Take it on the chin.

Their loss.

Move on life is for fucking

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago


"working.

Let's say you received that from a fellow Fabber. How would you respond/feel?

How would you tell someone it's not working? "

If I didn’t care I would be alright with it, and probably think it’s not working anyway.

Bit if I care, it would hurt me deeply if I thought we were working out.

But that’s it when two people are involved one half might think one thing and the other might think another.

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By *iasubTV/TS
42 weeks ago

Ilkeston

Honestly i would have a lot of respect for them as its harder to say that than keep going and not enjoy it. We are all here to have an enjoyable experience so its better to stop than continue.

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By *ad NannaWoman
42 weeks ago

East London

I'd probably already have an idea something was up.

I'd say thank you for telling me, and not ghosting like everyone else does.

I've never had to tell anyone it wasn't working, as they usually bail before it gets to that point.

If I was going to do the bailing I'd say something like I've had a great time but I'm not feeling it any more, or words to that effect.

Fab relationships aren't usually very deep, so "splitting up" isn't difficult.

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By *eli OP   Woman
42 weeks ago

.


"I would respect the honesty. Sometimes it just doesn’t work, despite how much you (both) might want it to.

You just have to be grown up and respectful about it and decide if there’s any chance that it’s salvageable, or whether to cut ties, hug and wish each other the best "

Hug and wish each other the best sounds quite final doesn't it? I think I'm quite soft and don't like giving up on or hurting people but perhaps being honest and direct is showing more respect? Maybe.

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago

I ended up listening to Pictures of You by The Cure a lot and then making a bit of an arse of myself

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By *ad NannaWoman
42 weeks ago

East London


"working.

Let's say you received that from a fellow Fabber. How would you respond/feel?

How would you tell someone it's not working?

If I didn’t care I would be alright with it, and probably think it’s not working anyway.

Bit if I care, it would hurt me deeply if I thought we were working out.

But that’s it when two people are involved one half might think one thing and the other might think another. "

I'm going to call myself lucky here, as, I can care about someone and not feel pain when they go.

I might miss the sex, but that can be found quite easily.

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By *luebell888Woman
42 weeks ago

Glasgowish

I would either agree or ask if it's worth fixing depending on how I felt about the person who made the comment.

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By *eli OP   Woman
42 weeks ago

.


"No right or wrong way.

Take it on the chin.

Their loss.

Move on life is for fucking "

Life isn't for fucking but my throat and quim is. :D

No, I know what you mean.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
42 weeks ago

Paradise, Herts

I’d appreciate the honesty and be fine with it. I’ve always seemed to have the mindset that if someone doesn’t want me I immediately don’t want them. Needs to be mutual for me. Yeah I can think aw that’s a shame I liked them but I wouldn’t pine.

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By *ruceyyMan
42 weeks ago

London


"working.

Let's say you received that from a fellow Fabber. How would you respond/feel?

How would you tell someone it's not working? "

Honestly I think the most cunty thing to do is overreact and treat them like shit.

No one is for everyone. They're not being rude, they don't want to have sex with you.

You can't expect people to want to have sex with you all the time!

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By *estarossa.Woman
42 weeks ago

Flagrante

I would hope I had some clue, and not be blind-sided.

That said, it totally depends on the dynamic.

Hopefully there is mutual respect, so we can just let it be with no hard feelings.

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By *ymAndIcedCoffeeWoman
42 weeks ago

Worcester

Anyone isn’t fine with it shouldn’t really be here.

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By *eli OP   Woman
42 weeks ago

.


"working.

Let's say you received that from a fellow Fabber. How would you respond/feel?

How would you tell someone it's not working?

If I didn’t care I would be alright with it, and probably think it’s not working anyway.

Bit if I care, it would hurt me deeply if I thought we were working out.

But that’s it when two people are involved one half might think one thing and the other might think another. "

Yes that's true. I think normally there are hints, feelings on both sides but sometimes both can see it differently.

I think how much you care will definitely affect how you feel receiving/sending it. If you don't really it's a quick done and dusted message. I feel like people deserve more if there is a level of care there.

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago

I'd much rather a message like that than be ghosted/slow faded.

I really value directness and honesty. If someone isn't feeling it, but respects me enough to be forthright about it I can wish them well and move on with my dignity intact. I might feel sad for a bit, but that's just part of life and will pass soon enough. The confusion and anxiety caused by a slow fade or ghosting is far more unpleasant.

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago

Oh, I forgot the second question. Soz, Meli...

I'd say something along the lines of "this is no longer working for me/I dont think we're compatible..."

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago

I'd be gutted, but ultimately ripping the plaster off for short term pain is better.. Hard to accept at the time though

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago

Thank you

Goodbye

*block*

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By *mf123Man
42 weeks ago

with one foot out the door

Id ask whats not working?

How important is it that whatever it is works?

What could be done to repair whats not working?

When did it work best?

That kind of thing

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By *oodmessMan
42 weeks ago

yumsville


"working.

Let's say you received that from a fellow Fabber. How would you respond/feel?

How would you tell someone it's not working? "

Things usually come to a natural conclusion, they are not usually a surprise "good bye" text. Getting a text like that is usually the result of weeks or months of previous doubt, laboured conversations and build up of something being a bit off. Whist it's better to say in person, "it's not working" is not usually sent off the cuff - if it were I'd be a bit gutted and want explanation.

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By *hYouNaughtyKittenWoman
42 weeks ago

Fife

I had to do exactly this last week. A message along the lines of “I’m not feeling this anymore”.

It was not received well

Zero regrets to no longer meeting him but I do feel bad that he was hurt. Didn’t think he would be remotely bothered so I was surprised at his reaction.

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago


"I'd much rather a message like that than be ghosted/slow faded.

I really value directness and honesty. If someone isn't feeling it, but respects me enough to be forthright about it I can wish them well and move on with my dignity intact. I might feel sad for a bit, but that's just part of life and will pass soon enough. The confusion and anxiety caused by a slow fade or ghosting is far more unpleasant."

Exactly.

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By *mf123Man
42 weeks ago

with one foot out the door

Oh you mean the end

Erm i didnt react well at all as most people who know me probly saw as i selfishly went a tad nuts and threw a 3 year denial fuelled tantrum that shook the foundations of the earth and a little bit of a mental break

But in my defence that was no simple fab fling to me so all in all im not right good at all this mushy touchy feely nonesense

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By *lexm87Man
42 weeks ago

Various


"I would hope I had some clue, and not be blind-sided.

That said, it totally depends on the dynamic.

Hopefully there is mutual respect, so we can just let it be with no hard feelings."

This is a gorgeous reply. It says so much in so few words.

Life is too short to waste on the wrong people. Move on, have a biscuit, do something new that challenges you.

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By *allandathleticMan
42 weeks ago

Asgard

Response "no worries. Happy fabbing!"

How would I tell someone.

"It's nothing personal but I don't feel like this is something I can continue pursuing. I think your an amazing human being and I hope you find whatever it is your looking for, happy fabbing."

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By *educing_EmCouple
42 weeks ago

Tipperary


"Response "no worries. Happy fabbing!"

How would I tell someone.

"It's nothing personal but I don't feel like this is something I can continue pursuing. I think your an amazing human being and I hope you find whatever it is your looking for, happy fabbing.""

Ohhhh he's back

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By *allandathleticMan
42 weeks ago

Asgard


"Response "no worries. Happy fabbing!"

How would I tell someone.

"It's nothing personal but I don't feel like this is something I can continue pursuing. I think your an amazing human being and I hope you find whatever it is your looking for, happy fabbing."

Ohhhh he's back "

Well hello Em. I hope your well

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By *eli OP   Woman
42 weeks ago

.


"I ended up listening to Pictures of You by The Cure a lot and then making a bit of an arse of myself "

Oh this is a bit sad. At first I thought you were joking and then I reread it and realised you might not have been.

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By *lder.Woman
42 weeks ago

Not Local

I would have sensed and overthought it long before the words ever needed saying

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago


"I ended up listening to Pictures of You by The Cure a lot and then making a bit of an arse of myself

Oh this is a bit sad. At first I thought you were joking and then I reread it and realised you might not have been."

We live and learn. Thankfully not had that experience again

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By *ecadent_DevonMan
42 weeks ago

Okehampton

From a fellow fabber? What couldn’t be working? I suppose I’m struggling to understand the “this”, but as a general rule of thumb, if someone wants “out”, then that’s cool, no need to be hurt by it, they have their reasons, no need to over analyse, we are all ships that pass in the night, the further away from each other we get, the dimmer the light of presence becomes.

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago

Triggering

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By *olfandtazCouple
42 weeks ago

Bristol

I'd be open and honest about things not working. Especially on here where there needs to be some kind of connection

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago

I had it from a guy I met for a few dates recently. "I don't want to see you for now". No explanation. A bit blunt for my liking but hey ho. If he'd been nicer about it I'd have been fine. (And I told him that)

I'd say "You seem really nice, but I'm just not feeling it. I don't think we are a good match. I wish you all the best finding what you're looking for".

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
42 weeks ago

Reading

I would thank them for telling me and wish them luck.

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
42 weeks ago

Reading

Oh I would also delete them from any messaging apps so I'm not tempted to contact them.

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By *VineMan
42 weeks ago

The right place

I’d want to check the reason given for it not working.

I’d want to check there wasn’t a misunderstanding of something said. But assuming there wasn’t, then I would just accept it. I have no desire to be with someone that doesn’t want to spend time with me.

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By *eli OP   Woman
42 weeks ago

.


"I'd much rather a message like that than be ghosted/slow faded.

I really value directness and honesty. If someone isn't feeling it, but respects me enough to be forthright about it I can wish them well and move on with my dignity intact. I might feel sad for a bit, but that's just part of life and will pass soon enough. The confusion and anxiety caused by a slow fade or ghosting is far more unpleasant."

Ach but the slow fade after trying is my thing. The last time I was very direct and said something wasn't working it was taken... very poorly. I'm tempted to stick with the slow fade method but I also know directness is what I like. What a quandary.

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By *eli OP   Woman
42 weeks ago

.


"Triggering "

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
42 weeks ago

chichester

Just say ok and goodbye

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