FabSwingers.com forum: Catfish..what to do ?

By *ingerfizz OP Woman
43 weeks ago

london

My first ever post ...,

this probably more a cathartic rant ,than seeking a solution

Been , chatting to a photo verified couple. Chatting to the 'female' half

Despite a couple of things not quite seeming right , I persevered .

That's me... human nature ,where we want to be optimistic, that things are as they seem

Anyway, without going into detail,it is now obvious, I have been chatting to a man only , pretending to be the female of the couple

I call 'him' out on this and whole dynamic turns aggressive and rude

First question ..why !??

Second question , what can we do ?

Obviously, we can't go down the road of blocking profiles just because I get the hunch , feeling ,(actually know) I'm being catfished.. but its sooo frustrating

OK rant over

You know what? I do feel better now

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
43 weeks ago

Reading

good! Just chalk it up.to experience.

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By (user no longer on site)
43 weeks ago

Shameful this happens

I don't even want to think about the excuses they drag out for meets or what happens if it goes further

The why is probably that they think they'll have better luck and I'd like to say they won't but given this isn't instantaneous conversation it's all too easy to fake things

What you can do is ask for multiple photos of the women at different angles or start asking questions that make them guess burden shouldn't be on you I know

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By *ooking4othersMan
43 weeks ago

Here ...

Trust your insticts ... and use the block button ... your instincts may have kicked in on your current interaction but might not the next time!

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By *aizyWoman
43 weeks ago

west midlands

Glad you feel better OP, and never feel bad about blocking because of a feeling, trust your instincts.

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
43 weeks ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

Simple. If you're not sure, don't engage with them.

It's not as if there aren't hundreds of profiles on here.

Why waste time on someone you're not convinced is who they claim to be? The catfish are usually very easy to spot and avoid after all.

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By *agic johnsonMan
43 weeks ago

morden

Can't get the idea of posing as a couple ,youl be found out as soon as the meet happens then the moments ruined , it don't have a chance of working surely

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By *he Silver FuxMan
43 weeks ago

Uttoxeter

A genuine couple will most likely agree to a quick phone livestream..

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By (user no longer on site)
43 weeks ago

"first ever post ...,

….

Second question , what can we do ?

Obviously, we can't go down the road of blocking profiles just because I get the hunch , feeling ,(actually know) I'm being catfished.. …."

Yes you can.

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By *ingerfizz OP Woman
43 weeks ago

london

No , what I meant was we can't report/ get admin to block/ suspend profiles , based on say my hunch

It leaves us all at risk of petty spite then

As the very wise consensus here is leaning ...I'll just chalk it up .

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By *issmorganWoman
43 weeks ago

Calderdale innit

"No , what I meant was we can't report/ get admin to block/ suspend profiles , based on say my hunch

It leaves us all at risk of petty spite then

As the very wise consensus here is leaning ...I'll just chalk it up .

I'd still report the profile anyway op and let admin have a look at it.

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By *coobyBoobyDooWoman
43 weeks ago

Markfield

"My first ever post ...,

this probably more a cathartic rant ,than seeking a solution

Been , chatting to a photo verified couple. Chatting to the 'female' half

Despite a couple of things not quite seeming right , I persevered .

That's me... human nature ,where we want to be optimistic, that things are as they seem

Anyway, without going into detail,it is now obvious, I have been chatting to a man only , pretending to be the female of the couple

I call 'him' out on this and whole dynamic turns aggressive and rude

First question ..why !??

Second question , what can we do ?

Obviously, we can't go down the road of blocking profiles just because I get the hunch , feeling ,(actually know) I'm being catfished.. but its sooo frustrating

OK rant over

You know what? I do feel better now

I’m so pleased the rant has made you feel better

it really is good to talk! You can report and block profiles that leave you feeling uneasy but just be aware that if you’ve been chatting off site then the team in the background can’t view those convos.

Don’t use this experience as a measure of other contacts but do remember the gut feeling of suspicion and recognise it next time, there is always a next time! But there are good people here too x

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By *hismMan
43 weeks ago

Ballygonowhere

There is absolutely nothing wrong with blocking people when you get the hunch.

Here on fabswingers,the block button is more of a friend than those you have doubts about

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By *ingerfizz OP Woman
43 weeks ago

london

You know something good from this

You guys are abso -frigging-lutley lovely . All of you

Never used the forum before..I kind of like it here

Thank you all xx

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By *parkle1974Woman
43 weeks ago

Leeds

Welcome to the forums OP.

My advice: Block and move on. Chalk it up to experience.

Things like this will always happen on sites like these.

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By *RWoodyCouple
43 weeks ago

Lincolnshire

Its good to talk OP

And welcome to the forums!

You're spot on, there are indeed some lovely people on here who offer some great advice.

Trusting your instinct (wether right or wrong in the view of others) is never a bad starting point. I find sometimes things just click, sometimes they take some work, and other times make you pull a 'I'm really not so sure about this' face. Thats normally the marker here anyway.

J x

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By (user no longer on site)
43 weeks ago

Sorry to hear you were catfished OP…. It’s happened to me a few times along the way.

I realise not for everyone and not something that is done instantly before progressing the chat…

But Live Photo swap is so helpful. Or a video call.

These can obviously be done on platforms that don’t give away your personal details and will perhaps alleviate the worry/concern you might be being led on /tricked….

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By *rofessor ElementalMan
43 weeks ago

Durham

If you suspect someone is catfishing you, gather evidence, confront them calmly, and ultimately cut off contact to protect yourself from further deception. You’ve followed the booked on how the deal with those types and every one of these there’s multiple great folk so as they say chalk it up and move forward. Good luck with your search.

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By (user no longer on site)
43 weeks ago

Out of interest if a profile is photo verified can they be removed by admin as being fake as then how were they accepted as photo verified in the first place?

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By *r_PinkMan
43 weeks ago

london stratford

"My first ever post ...,

this probably more a cathartic rant ,than seeking a solution

Been , chatting to a photo verified couple. Chatting to the 'female' half

Despite a couple of things not quite seeming right , I persevered .

That's me... human nature ,where we want to be optimistic, that things are as they seem

Anyway, without going into detail,it is now obvious, I have been chatting to a man only , pretending to be the female of the couple

I call 'him' out on this and whole dynamic turns aggressive and rude

First question ..why !??

Second question , what can we do ?

Obviously, we can't go down the road of blocking profiles just because I get the hunch , feeling ,(actually know) I'm being catfished.. but its sooo frustrating

OK rant over

You know what? I do feel better now

The stupid thing is,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

You say you are looking for men on your profile so why pretend to be a couple! If your hunch is correct he must me some sort of gremlin catfisher!

It does make me wonder about some people on this site! and what motivates them to do stupid things for no reason at all!

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