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Sexually compatible or not

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
42 weeks ago

How important is sex to you, do you have to be sexually compatible to make a relationship work or is it only a part of a relationship?

If sex is important and your partner, the love of your life, was no longer able to partake for whatever reason, maybe medical, what would you do?

For me it’s a part of it, I can go without easily, if I was with someone and they could no longer “do it” there are so many other things you can do.

If they lost interest all together and we spoke about it, sourced counselling etc the honest answer is I don’t know what I’d do

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago

I’d cross that bridge if we came to it.

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By *orthern StarsCouple
42 weeks ago

Durham

We would find a compromise where we both were happy. It isn't fair to automatically expect your partner to not have a sex life because you either can't or don't want to.

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By *stellaWoman
42 weeks ago

London

It’s important to me.

If I was in a loving relationship where my partner no longer wanted to, I’d already be able to explore that element elsewhere as I’m a relationship anarchist and not seeking monogamy.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
42 weeks ago

Paradise, Herts

If they lost interest in sex I wouldn’t go to counselling. If they don’t want me they don’t want me. I wouldn’t want them in that way anymore

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By *acksparrow99Man
42 weeks ago

London

Sex is an important part of my life and I would not be able to go without it. I would move on.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
42 weeks ago

Paradise, Herts


"Sex is an important part of my life and I would not be able to go without it. I would move on. "

That’s easier said. I really don’t think you can know unless you are or have been in that situation. As with most things.

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By *mf123Man
42 weeks ago

with one foot out the door

I like lego but sticklebricks will do

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By *rLordMan
42 weeks ago

Swadlincote

It's hard when it happens, medical reasons for my wife's loss of interest.

But play alone now , her knowing of course

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By *ealitybitesMan
42 weeks ago

Belfast

Sex has never been a vital part of my life and still isn't.

I've gone 10 years with no sexual contact at all.

I've been here nearly 8 years and never once acted like a child in a sweet shop.

I'm still extremely fussy who I choose to get naked with. Emphasis on the word "choose".

I don't have sex just for the sake of it and never have done.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
42 weeks ago

I think that for me it’s the definition of sex.

If you’re talking intercourse as meaning sex.

Maybe intimacy is a better way of looking at it. There’s a lot that can be done without actual “penetration or even with help from the that.

I guess it is also more of a “mental thing” as in you no longer find them sexually attractive.

So I could live without actual penetration but not without touch and intimacy

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago

[Removed by poster at 29/01/24 07:59:35]

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
42 weeks ago

Leeds

It's important to me but there's far more important things in a long term relationship it wouldn't be the be all and end all, there's other things that can be done and compromise that can be made.

As long as communication is open it would be fine.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago

[Removed by poster at 29/01/24 08:00:21]

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By *ymAndIcedCoffeeWoman
42 weeks ago

Worcester

I'm ethically non-monogamous so I could probably make it work if they could no longer have sex any more.

If they didn't want to have sex with me because they didn't fancy me anymore then that would be a deal-breaker.

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago


"Sex is an important part of my life and I would not be able to go without it. I would move on. "

The loving commitment is strong with you isnt it?

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago

I’m in that predicament now, happily married for years. Due to cancer treatment and going through change, has put an end to our sex life. She can’t have hrt or anything like that.

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago

Compatibility will always change during a relationship. Tiredness, health, stress, shift patterns, kids and a million other things effect drive and desire. What we both do though is recognise when we are off our game and make sure the other doesn't suffer as a result. Sometimes that can be telling the other to masturbate or just helping the other to get off with oral/hands. It never lasts long and we are back to the filthy fuck times.

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago

Faithful people on fab..

They want to bed hop,shag anything with legs and pussy.

Some want married wifes.. Everyone is different.

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By *ymAndIcedCoffeeWoman
42 weeks ago

Worcester


"I’m in that predicament now, happily married for years. Due to cancer treatment and going through change, has put an end to our sex life. She can’t have hrt or anything like that. "

It's great that you have found a solution that you're both happy with. I'm sure that you're going above and beyond to make sure she's not feeling crappy about you being here with her consent.

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
42 weeks ago

Reading

I would.seek a solution with my partner. I think if we were still.intimate kissing etc I could get by with my wand. if even that goes then yes i would seek it elsewhere with the blessing of my partner.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
42 weeks ago

I think that maybe I am naive, I love to see that sparkle in their eye, their body react to a touch.

I also need chat, not just sexual, but something that makes my mind spin a little.

I don’t want to feel life becomes a “chore” when with someone, yes life can get in the way, but try and remember that initial attraction and spark.

So yes probably naive or a dreamer that comparability, for me, is more than sex. If I looked at me now compared to 30 years ago or even 10 years ago well let’s just say I have started to like a fry up more

So yes, it’s a complete “package” for me

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By *acksparrow99Man
42 weeks ago

London


"Sex is an important part of my life and I would not be able to go without it. I would move on.

The loving commitment is strong with you isnt it? "

Fucked enough women in all kinds of relationships to know commitment is a temporary thing.

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By *ris GrayMan
42 weeks ago

Dorchester

If they lost interest in sex i would have to have counselling

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By *parkle1974Woman
42 weeks ago

Leeds

Sex has so many forms. I would still be happy with them even if we couldn't have penetrative sex (there are plenty of possibilities still available).

If it was due to them not being interested in me anymore then that's a whole different kettle of fish. We'd talk, try find out what the issue is and make a decision as to what happens going forward x

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
42 weeks ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

It does help

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By *arlot o scaraWoman
42 weeks ago

Hell

Sex is an important part of life, but a partner losing their sex drive is often symptomatic of other problems - that’s the part that lots of people just don’t seem to understand

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
42 weeks ago

East Sussex

In a long relationship you're going to encounter all sorts of problems. Some can be resolved to the satisfaction of both and some can't. The strength of the relationship has more influence on whether the partners can live with any lack of resolution rather than sexual compatibility.

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By *ris GrayMan
42 weeks ago

Dorchester


"Sex has so many forms. I would still be happy with them even if we couldn't have penetrative sex (there are plenty of possibilities still available).

If it was due to them not being interested in me anymore then that's a whole different kettle of fish. We'd talk, try find out what the issue is and make a decision as to what happens going forward x"
How could anyone not be interested in you

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By *eroLondonMan
42 weeks ago

Covent Garden


"Faithful people on fab..

They want to bed hop, shag anything with legs and pussy.

Some want married wifes.. Everyone is different."

•

Faithless people on Fab..

They want to bed hop,shag anything with legs and cock.

Some want married husbands.. Everyone is different.

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By *parkle1974Woman
42 weeks ago

Leeds


"Sex has so many forms. I would still be happy with them even if we couldn't have penetrative sex (there are plenty of possibilities still available).

If it was due to them not being interested in me anymore then that's a whole different kettle of fish. We'd talk, try find out what the issue is and make a decision as to what happens going forward xHow could anyone not be interested in you "

Cos I'm almost 50, boobs are at my knees and I've more wrinkles than an old man's ball sack

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By *erdyCurvyInkedPervyWoman
42 weeks ago

West Yorkshire


"How important is sex to you, do you have to be sexually compatible to make a relationship work or is it only a part of a relationship?

If sex is important and your partner, the love of your life, was no longer able to partake for whatever reason, maybe medical, what would you do?

For me it’s a part of it, I can go without easily, if I was with someone and they could no longer “do it” there are so many other things you can do.

If they lost interest all together and we spoke about it, sourced counselling etc the honest answer is I don’t know what I’d do "

My husband and I don't have sex. He us asexual and much prefers being intimate in other ways. I do miss sex with him because I fancy the pants offa him but our relationship is much more than sex. He's a good man, an excellent father to my children, a good provider. He makes me happy, and I him. We have loads of shared experiences and have been through several difficult times, and come out the other side stronger, together. We have a lot of fun. There's lots of cuddles, hand holding, kissing. I love him dearly and we have a good life together. We just don't have sex.

I get that need fulfilled elsewhere.

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By *ris GrayMan
42 weeks ago

Dorchester


"Sex has so many forms. I would still be happy with them even if we couldn't have penetrative sex (there are plenty of possibilities still available).

If it was due to them not being interested in me anymore then that's a whole different kettle of fish. We'd talk, try find out what the issue is and make a decision as to what happens going forward xHow could anyone not be interested in you

Cos I'm almost 50, boobs are at my knees and I've more wrinkles than an old man's ball sack "
really i never noticed

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By *parkle1974Woman
42 weeks ago

Leeds


"Sex has so many forms. I would still be happy with them even if we couldn't have penetrative sex (there are plenty of possibilities still available).

If it was due to them not being interested in me anymore then that's a whole different kettle of fish. We'd talk, try find out what the issue is and make a decision as to what happens going forward xHow could anyone not be interested in you

Cos I'm almost 50, boobs are at my knees and I've more wrinkles than an old man's ball sack really i never noticed "

Distraction techniques work wonders

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
42 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

I'm happily poly. I don't need any one person to fill every need. And that's how I like things to be

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By *erdyCurvyInkedPervyWoman
42 weeks ago

West Yorkshire


"I'm happily poly. I don't need any one person to fill every need. And that's how I like things to be "

Yes, this too!

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By *eroLondonMan
42 weeks ago

Covent Garden

Sex and intimacy is very important to me in a relationship, and inherently intrinsic for it to thrive (for me). My relationship wavered and eventually failed to thrive which lead to the disintegration of our compatibilities.

Intimacy is important to me. I wouldn't be here otherwise.

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By *ilsaGeorgeCouple
42 weeks ago

kent

Sex is important to me, but less so than love and commitment. If you stay with someone for long enough, you will encounter all kinds of difficulties, emotional and physical and financial, and all of these things can impact your sex life. If you’re prepared to walk away when things change, it was never love to begin with. Sharing your life with someone means being there when things become difficult. I would even say, you don’t even know if it’s love until things go wrong. So no, I don’t want to live without sex, and at the moment I don’t have to, as we are both free to meet others if we wish, but if our circumstances were to change, I would definitely choose Ailsa over my sex life.

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By *parkle1974Woman
42 weeks ago

Leeds

Sorry to go off tangent but for those saying sex is important to them.....

What if it were you who couldn't have sex?

Just curious x

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By *ris GrayMan
42 weeks ago

Dorchester


"Sorry to go off tangent but for those saying sex is important to them.....

What if it were you who couldn't have sex?

Just curious x"
omg is their a voluntary euthanasia option

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
42 weeks ago


"Sorry to go off tangent but for those saying sex is important to them.....

What if it were you who couldn't have sex?

Just curious x"

This is my point, if you were with someone for years or months and something happened where they couldn’t have sex, most probably medically related, would people end that relationship on those grounds or seek alternate ways to pleasure each other

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago

Clearly sex is important to people on Fab! I wouldn't want to be in a relationship (again) where we were sexually incompatible. It's important to me. I'd like an ENM relationship from the start where both of us can meet sexual needs from others as needed.

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By *aith SkynbyrdWoman
42 weeks ago

Somewhere else


"Sorry to go off tangent but for those saying sex is important to them.....

What if it were you who couldn't have sex?

Just curious xomg is their a voluntary euthanasia option "

I’ll take you to Switzerland, Fred.

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By *ris GrayMan
42 weeks ago

Dorchester


"Sorry to go off tangent but for those saying sex is important to them.....

What if it were you who couldn't have sex?

Just curious xomg is their a voluntary euthanasia option

I’ll take you to Switzerland, Fred."
really i love Switzerland

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By *parkle1974Woman
42 weeks ago

Leeds


"Sorry to go off tangent but for those saying sex is important to them.....

What if it were you who couldn't have sex?

Just curious xomg is their a voluntary euthanasia option

I’ll take you to Switzerland, Fred."

I've booked his ticket

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
42 weeks ago

East Sussex


"Sorry to go off tangent but for those saying sex is important to them.....

What if it were you who couldn't have sex?

Just curious x

This is my point, if you were with someone for years or months and something happened where they couldn’t have sex, most probably medically related, would people end that relationship on those grounds or seek alternate ways to pleasure each other "

Seem alternate ways to pleasure each other.

There's a whole lot of emotions tied up in the actual act of penetration though. Far more than you realise. That's the difficult thing to navigate rather than the practicalities

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By *aith SkynbyrdWoman
42 weeks ago

Somewhere else


"Sorry to go off tangent but for those saying sex is important to them.....

What if it were you who couldn't have sex?

Just curious xomg is their a voluntary euthanasia option

I’ll take you to Switzerland, Fred.really i love Switzerland "

We’ll go skiing first, maybe you’ll do the Sonny Bono move and the next stop on the itinerary won’t be necessary

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By *aith SkynbyrdWoman
42 weeks ago

Somewhere else

iT’s A sEx sItE

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago

Sex for me in a relationship is a must. Mr J feels the same way.

Miss S x

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By *ris GrayMan
42 weeks ago

Dorchester


"Sorry to go off tangent but for those saying sex is important to them.....

What if it were you who couldn't have sex?

Just curious xomg is their a voluntary euthanasia option

I’ll take you to Switzerland, Fred.

I've booked his ticket "

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By *ris GrayMan
42 weeks ago

Dorchester


"Sorry to go off tangent but for those saying sex is important to them.....

What if it were you who couldn't have sex?

Just curious xomg is their a voluntary euthanasia option

I’ll take you to Switzerland, Fred.really i love Switzerland

We’ll go skiing first, maybe you’ll do the Sonny Bono move and the next stop on the itinerary won’t be necessary "
i can ski but don't go anywhere cold usually I've been up mount eiger mind

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By *andynecklaceWoman
42 weeks ago

West Brom

[Removed by poster at 29/01/24 11:10:03]

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By *andynecklaceWoman
42 weeks ago

West Brom

It depends on the reason, if they can't due to health reasons or if they have a low sex drive then it's not an issue at all. Sex has never been that important to me, I could easily go without it.

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By *a LunaWoman
42 weeks ago

South Wales

It depends really. If I felt loved and I loved them then I would manage getting by on cuddles and kisses etc.

Sex is important to me and I enjoy it. A lot. I’d also like a fella who enjoys doing it with me a lot.

But if I loved and adored them and they were unable to do the sex due to illness or whatnot then I’d just have a rub more often.

If I felt they were getting their sexual needs met elsewhere and were just playing me off then they’d get the elbow.

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By *MisschiefxTV/TS
42 weeks ago

London


"How important is sex to you, do you have to be sexually compatible to make a relationship work or is it only a part of a relationship?

"

It's important but not the be all and end all. Having a mental connection is far more important to me

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By (user no longer on site)
42 weeks ago

It's very important for me. Yes I'm a lovely guy with lots going for me, but I need to know that I'm sexually desirable. There's no relationship without that confirmatory sex. A friendship yes. Peck on cheek and 'holding the distance' hug.

I'd have to live on memories if sex could not happen. But if I couldn't have sex for some reason, and a person still wanted to stay/be with me, I'd do everything I could with what I had available to me.... which might be enough. But if there was something clearly missing, like an erect penis, I would want them to go and get it elsewhere, without shame or judgement. If they didn't want to stay with me, I'd understand. Knowing that we are sexually desirable is too important a part of the human condition.

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By *hrista BellendWoman
42 weeks ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

Do you mean penetration or all sexual activity?

Before joining fab I could happily be in a sexless relationship, nowadays, not a chance, I'd end it and walk, I don't need the penetration part, but I desperately need the sensual part and choose not to live without it.

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By *erkshire8299Man
42 weeks ago

slough

Snogging and fumbling around on the sofa can be as much fun as sex...intimacy is the mwin thing.

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By *sWyldWoman
42 weeks ago

Edinburgh

It's important to me but so is chemistry, affection, matched effort, good communication, mutual respect and honesty.

For a relationship to work, I need all of those things.

Sexual compatability is important but it can also improve with time too.

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By *ecky and justCouple
42 weeks ago

Godalming

Having been in a previous marriage where all intimacy of any kind stopped, the basics of the marriage stopped as well.

Trying to cope with it caused more harm to both sides and it was easier to end the relationship. (Safer for my sanity as well)

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