FabSwingers.com forum: If you cheat on your spouse

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

And they don't stick to the 'for worse' part of their wedding vows, do you have any right to be angry or upset and hold it against them?????

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By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Dorchester

Of course no excuses

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, you have no rights at all. I have cheated on my partner many times and if she held it against me I would just suck it up!

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By *weet and SpiceCouple
over a year ago

Around the Midlands

No because the wedding vows are also "forsaking all others"!

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By *eordieJeansCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

Cheating is disgusting. If you cheat you deserve all the shit that comes with it.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Person A cheats and gets angry because person B won't stick by them through 'worse' or because person B gets upset about the cheating?

Person A broke their vows first is all I'll say

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By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

On Holibobs

Not at all.

As Infidelity is a sin in the church's eyes and they are unforgivable to anyone who had a religious wedding.

In some religions Infidelity is punishable by death...

Now if the person who married them wasn't ordained, then its a different matter

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just lie. Shaggy did it and everything was ok

You don’t have to deal with the consequences of your actions and ruin a perfectly good marriage by telling the truth, that’s inconsiderate

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No because the wedding vows are also "forsaking all others"!"

Depends on the vows. A lot of couple write their own, and imagine swingers …. Do they look at that and think the same?

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Nope, actions have consequences.

The person who cheated broke the vows, so why should their spouse stick by them.

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By *or7Man
over a year ago

bath

"Cheating is disgusting. If you cheat you deserve all the shit that comes with it."

Many people would say swinging is cheating and equally disgusting .

I prefer not to judge what anyone else's does with their life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nah that ain’t it yall

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By *enk15Man
over a year ago

Evesham

I don't see how the person doing the cheating would ever have the right to be angry or upset with their partner for reacting to the infidelity.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wedding vows were created by man, not necessarily by nature.

Why did you cheat in the first place? Did they already cause the ‘for worse’ part for you to have cheated?

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By *eordieJeansCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

"Cheating is disgusting. If you cheat you deserve all the shit that comes with it.

Many people would say swinging is cheating and equally disgusting .

I prefer not to judge what anyone else's does with their life."

Swinging isn’t cheating though so that argument doesn’t really hold any weight.

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

"Cheating is disgusting. If you cheat you deserve all the shit that comes with it.

Many people would say swinging is cheating and equally disgusting .

I prefer not to judge what anyone else's does with their life."

Swinging is the opposite of cheating

Both people are involved and consent to it

With cheating one person is left out and isn't consenting, so it's not quite the same.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If a little cheating ruins a marriage, was it that strong of a marriage to start with anyways?

I’d always cheat just to see how loyal they really are. Sort the quitters from the keepers. It’s a great filter

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By *rispyDuckMan
over a year ago

Chinese Takeaway near you

"No because the wedding vows are also "forsaking all others"!"

This

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

I wouldn't want to play with someone who was cheating.

However, I wouldn't especially judge them as a person, either. Every case is an individual one and we seldom know the full story.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wish my wife would cheat

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Also, there's the usual double standard with these things.

Female on here cheating - more folk will accept it's a loveless marriage, only staying together because whatever and fair play for enjoying themselves as life is too short.

Male in the same boat - a very different reaction.

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By *cnugatugMan
over a year ago

Chatham

Cheating is cheating no matter the situation it's a horrible thing to do to a supposed loved one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Divorce, babe, divorce- Adele

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If a little cheating ruins a marriage, was it that strong of a marriage to start with anyways?

I’d always cheat just to see how loyal they really are. Sort the quitters from the keepers. It’s a great filter "

Please tell me you're being sarcastic.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If a little cheating ruins a marriage, was it that strong of a marriage to start with anyways?

I’d always cheat just to see how loyal they really are. Sort the quitters from the keepers. It’s a great filter

Please tell me you're being sarcastic."

He is lmao

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If a little cheating ruins a marriage, was it that strong of a marriage to start with anyways?

I’d always cheat just to see how loyal they really are. Sort the quitters from the keepers. It’s a great filter

Please tell me you're being sarcastic.

He is lmao"

It's almost as funny as the loopholes people have come out with above!

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

Swinging is not cheating… as long as boundaries have been discussed and agreed beforehand.

Cheating and then expecting someone to take you back because they made vows with a person who is a lying piece of shit is more than just cake and eat it.

It’s called being a cunt. Pure and simple

Ps. Don’t get my started on liars… not today. Thanks for listening

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had my fingers crossed at the time.

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania

"Wish my wife would cheat "

I think you should be careful what you wish for.

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By *ustamanMan
over a year ago

weymouth

"And they don't stick to the 'for worse' part of their wedding vows, do you have any right to be angry or upset and hold it against them?????

No, you have no right to be angry or even annoyed

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By *rozac_fairyCouple
over a year ago

tamworth

I'd actively discourage anyone saty with a cheating partner.

Cheating isn't just cheating. It's also showing a lack of respect, a lack of love and a lack of care. Noone should ever have to live in that and those willing to do that deserve a shower of shit

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By *ezandCCouple
over a year ago

Telford

Cheating breaks trust which is an essential part of a relationship, not sure how easy it would be to get that back.

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By *lym4realCouple
over a year ago

plymouth

Some on here get confused between the meaning's of the words "Cheating" and "Swinging" it seems and nope cheating is never good and Mrs4 is dealing with the fall out with one of her friends being cheated on ( repeatedly) and not very nice at all......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If a little cheating ruins a marriage, was it that strong of a marriage to start with anyways?

I’d always cheat just to see how loyal they really are. Sort the quitters from the keepers. It’s a great filter

Please tell me you're being sarcastic."

Not at all. How loyal are you really if a little cheating ruins a perfectly good marriage

It’s just selfish to let that get in the way

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

" Some on here get confused between the meaning's of the words "Cheating" and "Swinging" it seems and nope cheating is never good and Mrs4 is dealing with the fall out with one of her friends being cheated on ( repeatedly) and not very nice at all......

What if you're on a swinging site with your spouse but you cheat on them through your single profile, you know...proper shag someone behind their back, they have no clue about it.

Is that swinging or cheating?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If a little cheating ruins a marriage, was it that strong of a marriage to start with anyways?

I’d always cheat just to see how loyal they really are. Sort the quitters from the keepers. It’s a great filter

Please tell me you're being sarcastic.

Not at all. How loyal are you really if a little cheating ruins a perfectly good marriage

It’s just selfish to let that get in the way "

I don't know whether to mouth what the fuck on reading that comment or laugh.

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

What if you're on a swinging site with your spouse but you cheat on them through your single profile, you know...proper shag someone behind their back, they have no clue about it.

Is that swinging or cheating?

Cheating. 100%.

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By *ags73Man
over a year ago

glasgow-ish

Cheated on in a relationship, at time, I sorta knew, didn’t want it confirmed and it ended up tearing things apart. Worse was later knowing the guy was doing it as he’d been dumped by his wife.

Swinging with consent, agreement, discussion a whole different thing

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By *leanandkeenMan
over a year ago

jarrow

Am I cheating if my wife has told me to get my sexual needs met else where but she doesn’t want to know about it or have anyone come to the door ?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Am I cheating if my wife has told me to get my sexual needs met else where but she doesn’t want to know about it or have anyone come to the door ?

No because she knows.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cheating breaks trust which is an essential part of a relationship, not sure how easy it would be to get that back. "

The trust is easy to return to. *just my opinion but!!!

Just try and return to that respect you once had the privilege having. The one where you were the only person that had never hurt them. That’s the bitch right there, that’s the one that keeps you up at night, that’s the one where you can’t hold your head up high and be proud. Thats the one where you ch*ke when you look at the person who once had your back. That’s the respect you lost and won’t ever return.

Trust is an easy thing to establish. Respect is gone for good. Again, just my opinion.

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania

"Cheating breaks trust which is an essential part of a relationship, not sure how easy it would be to get that back. "

It can he done, but it requires total commitment and willingness from both parties, and some couples counselling can be extremely helpful.

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By *essaMayWoman
over a year ago

Fairytale Wood

On these threads you will always get opposing views. People will always find their own justification and seek validation, whether it is cheating or opposed to cheating or judging.

Saw it earlier "Forsaking All Others" isn't swinging in its very essence, breaking at least that marriage vow. Consensual or not.

Guys do get a much harder time over it than women, many will postulate about the immorality of cheating in forum/chat if it is guy, but wouldn't give it a second thought to a women if it got them on their pants and into bed. Seen it so many times over the years.

Just being devils advocate.

"Do no judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you."

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By *enk15Man
over a year ago

Evesham

"If a little cheating ruins a marriage, was it that strong of a marriage to start with anyways?

I’d always cheat just to see how loyal they really are. Sort the quitters from the keepers. It’s a great filter

Please tell me you're being sarcastic.

Not at all. How loyal are you really if a little cheating ruins a perfectly good marriage

It’s just selfish to let that get in the way "

I'm astonished that this is anyone's stance.

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By *lowhands7Man
over a year ago

South Leicestershire (willing to travel)

"No because the wedding vows are also "forsaking all others"!"

That's the one and only answer you need

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By *enk15Man
over a year ago

Evesham

What if you're on a swinging site with your spouse but you cheat on them through your single profile, you know...proper shag someone behind their back, they have no clue about it.

Is that swinging or cheating?

"...But you cheat on them through..."

You answered your own question.

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By *heelz69Man
over a year ago

Manchester

I can't stand cheaters, I don't see the point if you want to sleep around be single, or open/poly etc.

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By *oberto7Man
over a year ago

Greenock

Let thee who hasn't sinned cast the 1st stone..

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

Is that even a question?!

Of course you don’t

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By *educing_EmCouple
over a year ago

Tipperary

Absolutely not and anybody thinking that way is a massive narcissist

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

I mean technically the logic is sound!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The issue with the cheating for me wasnt the actual sex it was all the lieing that went with it.

That's what hurt.

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By *crumdiddlyumptiousMan
over a year ago

"I can't stand cheaters, I don't see the point if you want to sleep around be single, or open/poly etc. "

^ this

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By *aith SkynbyrdWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere else

"And they don't stick to the 'for worse' part of their wedding vows, do you have any right to be angry or upset and hold it against them?????

You can feel any way you like but you don’t have the right to punish them for something you did.

I think that’s what you’re asking?

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

No. Relationships are built on trust and if that trust is broken then what is left? The burnt out ruins of a relationship that’s what.

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By *ddie1966Man
over a year ago

Paper Town Central, Essex.

Absolutely not.

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By *usie pTV/TS
over a year ago

taunton

Has anyone got a copy of the marriage contract, have never seen mine and long ago forgot what was said on the day, must be an opt out clause in the small print some where for partners who have served a number of years of forced celibacy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You cheat, that vow has already been broken anyway.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No because the wedding vows are also "forsaking all others"!"

For suck all others ? Comfused here ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fishy fingers n chips yes

Cheats ? No ...

Tiger bread . Yes please

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By *heelz69Man
over a year ago

Manchester

"Has anyone got a copy of the marriage contract, have never seen mine and long ago forgot what was said on the day, must be an opt out clause in the small print some where for partners who have served a number of years of forced celibacy."

Yeah it's called a divorce

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By *inger_SnapWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

What if you're on a swinging site with your spouse but you cheat on them through your single profile, you know...proper shag someone behind their back, they have no clue about it.

Is that swinging or cheating?

Cheating... Swinging is about open communication and being transparent. It really is the lowest of the low and shows what little respect you have for someone. I don't know why on earth you'd think someone should stick to their vows after you've destroyed the trust.

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By *ab FunstersCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

"Just lie. Shaggy did it and everything was ok

You don’t have to deal with the consequences of your actions and ruin a perfectly good marriage by telling the truth, that’s inconsiderate "

Something is wrong with the marriage if you feel the need to cheat and lie to your partner.

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By *unCycleGymRepeatMan
over a year ago

Greater London

I have 2 friends, who in the last year have been cheated on by their husband and wife.

The friend-guy is now on anti-depressants and fighting hard to see his kids for 2 days per week.

The friend-girl, was cheated on by her husband with her friend. They got 3 kids and she was also on anti-depressents.

It's the lying, gas-lighting that goes with the cheating which uttly ruins people's lives. It takes years to reach a resolution for all parties, without a thought for the people affected the most, the children.

The kids will effectively be moved around to homes finding their own way in this mess.

Cheating is utterly tragic for all concerned, regardless if you are caught or not, relationships between parents and children will change.

The deverstation is horrendous.

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

"Just lie. Shaggy did it and everything was ok

You don’t have to deal with the consequences of your actions and ruin a perfectly good marriage by telling the truth, that’s inconsiderate

Something is wrong with the marriage if you feel the need to cheat and lie to your partner."

As much as I dislike cheats it’s probably fair to say most know that’s is the case, something is very wrong

But maybe they don’t know what to do to fix it and are too scared to leave.

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By *aith SkynbyrdWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere else

Cheating is for cowards.

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