FabSwingers.com forum: No intimacy

By *ust jizz OP Man
over a year ago

stockport

Not had sex with my wife for a very long time. I’ve thought of sex on here with other women as cheating but I really really really am missing a warm pussy to be inside.

Can anyone help

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By *ittlemissFlirtyCouple
over a year ago

3rd Rock from the sun

Talk to her ...

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By *rozac_fairyCouple
over a year ago

tamworth

I'd recommend couples therapy tbh.

Or talk to her, ya know, like partners do when they have difficulties in their relationship.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

You could always grow a back bone.

The mr

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By *a1970Man
over a year ago

East cork

Yes talk to here.... Step up the romance a bit.... Let her know you need her... You need her touch.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

get yourself a pussycat hot water bottle, and talk to your wife?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Consider how you’d feel if you caught her on here

Really consider that

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By *r_reusMan
over a year ago

Coventry

"Talk to her ..."

It is interesting how people so often consider cheating before talking about their relationships?

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By *ink vixenCouple
over a year ago

Medway

She’s probably missing some cock and thinking of fucking some other guy as well to be fair.

Hope you both get to enjoy yourselves in 2024.

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By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

Bliss

Maybe let her know that you are meeting men for sex on here first

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Talk to her and if you can't sort it out go your separate ways , this is not the place to solve your problem .

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Talk to her ...

It is interesting how people so often consider cheating before talking about their relationships?"

I find it interesting that people on the forum tend to assume that people considering cheating haven't already tried the talking, the therapy, everything they can think of.

Some people are just stuck in an awful situation. And leaving isn't always an option.

That's not true for everyone though.

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By *rsMistyPeaksWoman
over a year ago

Essex

"Talk to her ...

It is interesting how people so often consider cheating before talking about their relationships?

I find it interesting that people on the forum tend to assume that people considering cheating haven't already tried the talking, the therapy, everything they can think of.

Some people are just stuck in an awful situation. And leaving isn't always an option.

That's not true for everyone though."

This!!!!!

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Talk to her ...

It is interesting how people so often consider cheating before talking about their relationships?

I find it interesting that people on the forum tend to assume that people considering cheating haven't already tried the talking, the therapy, everything they can think of.

Some people are just stuck in an awful situation. And leaving isn't always an option.

That's not true for everyone though."

Yes! Also if a woman were to say she was missing the intimacy of sex with her husband I would hazard a guess that her in box would overflow and a good proportion of responses on the thread would be sympathetic. I doubt anyone would suggest showing her husband affection or doing the washing up.

I wonder when the next thread telling us to be kind or expressing shock at the decline in men's mental health will pop up...

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

Just stick with fucking men. I'm sure that'll be much less hurtful for her to find out about

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Talk to her ...

It is interesting how people so often consider cheating before talking about their relationships?

I find it interesting that people on the forum tend to assume that people considering cheating haven't already tried the talking, the therapy, everything they can think of.

Some people are just stuck in an awful situation. And leaving isn't always an option.

That's not true for everyone though.

I wonder when the next thread telling us to be kind or expressing shock at the decline in men's mental health will pop up..."

It's a wonder, isn't it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Try a fleshlight

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"Talk to her ...

It is interesting how people so often consider cheating before talking about their relationships?

I find it interesting that people on the forum tend to assume that people considering cheating haven't already tried the talking, the therapy, everything they can think of.

Some people are just stuck in an awful situation. And leaving isn't always an option.

That's not true for everyone though."

This

. Everything is black or white though here. You must know that!

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By *ent in BlackMan
over a year ago

Silsden

"Not had sex with my wife for a very long time. I’ve thought of sex on here with other women as cheating but I really really really am missing a warm pussy to be inside.

Can anyone help"

Perhaps tell her you’re on fab looking for extra marital sex and see how better your relationship becomes….

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By *imisugarWoman
over a year ago

Rugby

Would she be hurt knowing you have an account?

Not sure how long you've been a member, after the 12 months it just shows over 1 year.

Definitely try speaking to her.

Cheating won't help your issue

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

The help you need is probably within and about your relationship - talking, counselling, and considering whether you're happy to remain if nothing changes. I'm sure you know that.

I'm afraid I did recoil at the expression "a warm pussy to be inside".

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By *a1970Man
over a year ago

East cork

This is a 1000 year old problem, smart sarcastic comments don't really help.... Genuine sound unjudgemental advice is a mature way to respond.

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By *ebauchedDeviantsPt2Couple
over a year ago

Cumbria

"Not had sex with my wife for a very long time. I’ve thought of sex on here with other women as cheating but I really really really am missing a warm pussy to be inside.

Can anyone help"

I think one of your issues may be that you talk about a lack of intimacy but then say “but I really really really am missing a warm pussy to be inside.” Intimacy doesn’t equal sex, sex can be part of intimacy in a relationship but the problem may be that it’s the only thing you consider intimate?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Talk to her ...

It is interesting how people so often consider cheating before talking about their relationships?

I find it interesting that people on the forum tend to assume that people considering cheating haven't already tried the talking, the therapy, everything they can think of.

Some people are just stuck in an awful situation. And leaving isn't always an option.

That's not true for everyone though."

Because many people seem to be incapable of fathoming a life that doesn’t match the parameters of their own; ‘this is how it is for me, so everyone must/could/should be able to do the same’.

Which is, of course, bollocks.

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By *r PantyMan
over a year ago

Morpeth

I'm not sure that sticking it into someone else will resolve any problems that you have in your relationship, in fact it's more likely to cause more problems than in your worst nightmare. You have a hand I'm assuming ? use it for the time being then talk to her properly and see if you can find out the reason why you're not getting any from her.

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By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Dorchester

Get one of them toys you fuck, flesh lite is it?

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish

"Would she be hurt knowing you have an account?

Not sure how long you've been a member, after the 12 months it just shows over 1 year.

Definitely try speaking to her.

Cheating won't help your issue"

There's a photo from 2015.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

Sex with someone else will be the nail in the coffin if caught. If that doesn’t bother you then sit down and spell it out to the wife.

Communication is the way forward, not cheating.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You do not have to be having physical sex to be cheating. If you are on here, even contemplating meeting someone else, then you have already started the cheating process unless of course she is fully aware of your presence on this site. It has been said many times over. Sit down and talk to your wife. New Year new starts new level of honesty you may well be surprised by what the discussion brings.

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By *uliette500Woman
over a year ago

Hull

Everyone is so quick to judge on here.

Nobody knows someone else's situation. We don't know what they've already tried.

Why not just let people live how they want to live, you don't need to get involved with someone who doesn't suit you but you don't need to judge the or be unkind and rude to them either.

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By *ddiesayshello2Man
over a year ago

dundalk , Monaghan,meath

"Not had sex with my wife for a very long time. I’ve thought of sex on here with other women as cheating but I really really really am missing a warm pussy to be inside.

Can anyone help"

Are yous even having oral, handjob blowjob eat pussy etc? if so not all is lost

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By *inger_SnapWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

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By *imisugarWoman
over a year ago

Rugby

"Would she be hurt knowing you have an account?

Not sure how long you've been a member, after the 12 months it just shows over 1 year.

Definitely try speaking to her.

Cheating won't help your issue

There's a photo from 2015.

Oh my I probably should have checked, I only looked to see if it was a brand new accounts.

I know if I was in a monogamous relationship I'd be hurt by this. Potentially explains the lack of intimacy.

Agree with other posters, initimacy doesn't just mean sex. Comes across very self centred! Your needs have to be met. What have you done to improve the situation at home?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not had sex with my wife for a very long time. I’ve thought of sex on here with other women as cheating but I really really really am missing a warm pussy to be inside.

Can anyone help"

I think the only person who can help you is you. Missing intimacy doesn't really match up with "missing a warm pussy to be inside" to be honest. And you've been here since at least 2015, you're fucking men and that is also cheating. If you still love your wife, consider how that might make her feel and if she senses that you're not being honest - might be responsible for the lack of intimacy from her.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You do not have to be having physical sex to be cheating. If you are on here, even contemplating meeting someone else, then you have already started the cheating process unless of course she is fully aware of your presence on this site. It has been said many times over. Sit down and talk to your wife. New Year new starts new level of honesty you may well be surprised by what the discussion brings."

50% chance of an utter shitstorm, I suspect. The many people who claim to want the truth don’t like it when they receive it.

Not suggesting the talk shouldn’t happen, it absolutely should and the shady activity should stop.

But it’s a bit early to paint the outcome as a shower of

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By *ature male OldhamMan
over a year ago

Royton nr Oldham

"Consider how you’d feel if you caught her on here

Really consider that "

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

50% chance of an utter shitstorm, I suspect. The many people who claim to want the truth don’t like it when they receive it.

Not suggesting the talk shouldn’t happen, it absolutely should and the shady activity should stop.

But it’s a bit early to paint the outcome as a shower of

I think these kind of marital conversations are a bit like treating cancer. The side effects of cancer treatment *suck*. Really suck. But letting cancer progress unchecked is ultimately worse.

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By *istalloverCouple
over a year ago

Pays de la Loire -Normandie -Brittany borderFrance

Funnily enough

Your wife posted the type of post.

Difference is

She had over 500 offers from males

Try wine and chocolates 1st .

They are half price from today too

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By *erces LetiferMan
over a year ago

Somewhere off the edge of the map... 'ere there be monsters

"Not had sex with my wife for a very long time. I’ve thought of sex on here with other women as cheating but I really really really am missing a warm pussy to be inside.

Can anyone help"

Yeah, you. You can help. How? Communicate. Ask your wife why you've not had any sex or intimacy in a long time. Then, and here's the really important part, listen carefully to her answer(s). Assuming she is open and honest and provides any answer(s). If she's not willing to answer or talk about it, time for couple's counselling. If she's not willing to do that, time end the relationship and leave.

Or, don't do any of that and nothing will change. It's up to you. Good luck.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Can only be dealt with by you and her. You've been here for years, so presumably you are both open and honest?

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By *ust jizz OP Man
over a year ago

stockport

Thank you for the replies, many from a genuine place some just sadly off the kind expected. To put people at their ease the talks have been done and the counselling. We get on but just not there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you've fucked men then why is a woman any different when it comes to cheating?

If you've discussed it with her and nothing is happening, then you must know what your options are. You stay and cheat. You stay and settle for a sexless relationship. Or you break up and find someone else. It's a shitty situation and not an easy decision. I like to think I would just walk away, but I know it isn't that simple.

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By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

Bliss

"Thank you for the replies, many from a genuine place some just sadly off the kind expected. To put people at their ease the talks have been done and the counselling. We get on but just not there. "

Is an agreement to have an open marriage, not available to you both?

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By *erces LetiferMan
over a year ago

Somewhere off the edge of the map... 'ere there be monsters

"To put people at their ease the talks have been done and the counselling. We get on but just not there."

If the talks and the counselling have been done, what's the current understanding between you both when it comes to sex and intimacy? You say you miss it, have you told her that? What was the answer(s) from her as to why it's not happened for a long time? Are you open and honest with her about being on here for the last decade? Is she okay with you sleeping with other men?

There's very little context for us to go on if you truly want any help with this.

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish

"Thank you for the replies, many from a genuine place some just sadly off the kind expected. To put people at their ease the talks have been done and the counselling. We get on but just not there. "

In that case what help were you expecting? A long line of 'warm pussy' shouting "pick me"?

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By *imisugarWoman
over a year ago

Rugby

There's very little context for us to go on if you truly want any help with this."

Agree it is slightly vague and the OP replies aren't addressing all that's been asked. Obviously your prerogative but you won't get tailored responses to the info you've currently provided.

From my viewpoint it's coming across she is totally unaware you are on here. That may not be the case.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP I gotta ask, why don't you just tell her you're on here?

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By *ust jizz OP Man
over a year ago

stockport

Deffo no. Also not likely to happen

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Maybe let her know that you are meeting men for sex on here first "

Check mate I do believe x

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By *atureguy65Man
over a year ago

Dorchester

"Not had sex with my wife for a very long time. I’ve thought of sex on here with other women as cheating but I really really really am missing a warm pussy to be inside.

Can anyone help

Are yous even having oral, handjob blowjob eat pussy etc? if so not all is lost"

That's a surprising comment! There must be thousands of couples for whom the missionary position is their only way. Such as oral, hand job, blowjob, eat pussy, would come as a great shock to many - and for others be the unattainable icing on the cake.

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By *hrimper36Couple
over a year ago

Central France dept 36

8 years on fab which is obviously fine and indeed dandy if she knows but personally my advice is get a divorce because maybe just maybe she deserves better and walk away as friends and then possibly your click bait wow is me thread may bear fruit.

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By *hrimper36Couple
over a year ago

Central France dept 36

*woe* not wow!!!!!

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By *anJenny 181Couple
over a year ago

Preston

[Removed by poster at 01/01/24 19:24:30]

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By *anJenny 181Couple
over a year ago

Preston

We simply will not meet any married man.

The Menopause can reduce a woman's sex drive and I would also recommend that you talk to each other about your needs with a view to professional help from GP / well woman clinics, possibly a sex therapist.

During the Menopause is when a woman really needs her fella to man up and support her / should she be experiencing this problem.

Sometimes it's not about sex but holding her hand, stroking her hair and telling her you love her,

Have some fun days out, give her a spa day, picnic, romantic weekend away without sex, show her love and maybe the sex will return.

It also says you are bi does she know this, that would put most women off, or does she suspect you like men ?

My main point get professional help

Talk to her - communication is key

No one on fab wants a woman scorned knocking at their door - many couples stay well away from married men.

Good luck to the both of you.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

"No one on fab wants a woman scorned knocking at their door - many couples stay well away from married men.

Not just couples. As a single woman I can tell you that having an angry wife and mother in law show up on my doorstep was a hell of a slap in the face.

Especially considering he hadn't actually warned me that was the situation.

But if he had, I still wouldn't have been cool with it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No one on fab wants a woman scorned knocking at their door - many couples stay well away from married men.

Not just couples. As a single woman I can tell you that having an angry wife and mother in law show up on my doorstep was a hell of a slap in the face.

Especially considering he hadn't actually warned me that was the situation.

But if he had, I still wouldn't have been cool with it

What did you do?

I would have told them to fuck right off. Ridiculous blaming you for the shit he was doing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not had sex with my wife for a very long time. I’ve thought of sex on here with other women as cheating but I really really really am missing a warm pussy to be inside.

Can anyone help"

Why on earth do you think a woman would fuck you out of sympathy?

A last resort for a man who needs a warm pussy. Hell no.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

"No one on fab wants a woman scorned knocking at their door - many couples stay well away from married men.

Not just couples. As a single woman I can tell you that having an angry wife and mother in law show up on my doorstep was a hell of a slap in the face.

Especially considering he hadn't actually warned me that was the situation.

But if he had, I still wouldn't have been cool with it

What did you do?

I would have told them to fuck right off. Ridiculous blaming you for the shit he was doing."

Apologised for being a part of it. Explained that I honestly didn't know and the usual red flags weren't there, and was honest about how long we'd been sleeping together and that he had definitely been with other people during that time.

So far she hasn't come back and firebombed my house. Hopefully it stays that way. I can understand her being angry in the moment and lashing out, but I certainly never asked for or knowingly engaged in that shit.

But putting me in that position was a super shitty thing to do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"To put people at their ease the talks have been done and the counselling. We get on but just not there.

There's very little context for us to go on if you truly want any help with this."
bumping this as they are a wonderfully non judgemental and curious set of questions that may help us help you find a way through this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No one on fab wants a woman scorned knocking at their door - many couples stay well away from married men.

Not just couples. As a single woman I can tell you that having an angry wife and mother in law show up on my doorstep was a hell of a slap in the face.

Especially considering he hadn't actually warned me that was the situation.

But if he had, I still wouldn't have been cool with it

What did you do?

I would have told them to fuck right off. Ridiculous blaming you for the shit he was doing.

But putting me in that position was a super shitty thing to do

Did he apologise? It's worse than super shitty. He allowed them to find your details.

Hope you are ok. Must have been awful.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

"Did he apologise? It's worse than super shitty. He allowed them to find your details.

Hope you are ok. Must have been awful."

Do apologies make up for that kind of thing?

There's been a lot of words. But as a single woman living alone, I do not need that kind of stress hanging over me and my home

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By *mf123Man
over a year ago

with one foot out the door

Its not intimacy its into me i see

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not had sex with my wife for a very long time. I’ve thought of sex on here with other women as cheating but I really really really am missing a warm pussy to be inside.

Can anyone help"

Talk to her. Tell her you’re into cock now and see how she feels about giving up her warm pussy.

It probably warm from all the other cock she’s getting elsewhere.

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By *iss LovelyWoman
over a year ago

Here and There

You’ve had lots of advice OP, but it seems that that’s not what you were looking for. Were you instead hoping for lots of warm pussy offers to take your pick from?

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