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63 years old and put out to pasture

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By *orthwestbikerxx OP   Man
over a year ago

lancs

is it just me ,just after menopause

Wife went totally off sex

Which I understand totally

But obviously I still enjoy sex

But at 63 like being put back in box .

Plenty bi guys about and I've had odd couple meets

But where are the mature ladies must be some in fab world

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By *avexxMan
over a year ago

cheshire

get yourself out of that box buddy,,

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By *usie pTV/TS
over a year ago

taunton

You have joined a massive club and for some it is a living hell.

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By *ocktoplaywithMan
over a year ago

Derby

I’m in there too but I joined in my early fifties

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By *JB1954Man
over a year ago

Reading

Join the club. I am a widower and yes 69. So finding a female to even , chat with . Let alone have sex with . The odds are very much against happening. Yes do as posted have a lot younger female friend. So may happen with her . Treat her as friend if people understand.

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By *inkygentkentMan
over a year ago

Maidstone

Me too - at 48!

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By *oontzMan
over a year ago

Nantwich

I find that women generally place a higher value on intimate relationships and need

to be emotionally supported. Whereas men place a much higher value on sexual intimacy than women and as a consequence, and in answer to your question, mature women are less likely to seek out sex with a man (stranger) just to gratify some sexual urge. I think that's why so many men in your (our) position seek sexual intimacy with other other men to satisfy some kind of primal urge that has existed since time began. We want the sex without the emotional baggage and commitment. I doubt that you'll ever find what you're looking for but good luck anyway....

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By *ocktoplaywithMan
over a year ago

Derby


"I find that women generally place a higher value on intimate relationships and need

to be emotionally supported. Whereas men place a much higher value on sexual intimacy than women and as a consequence, and in answer to your question, mature women are less likely to seek out sex with a man (stranger) just to gratify some sexual urge. I think that's why so many men in your (our) position seek sexual intimacy with other other men to satisfy some kind of primal urge that has existed since time began. We want the sex without the emotional baggage and commitment. I doubt that you'll ever find what you're looking for but good luck anyway.... "

I’d be quite happy with intimacy and no sex, maybe even some hugs and cuddles. But despite us getting on better than we ever have, we do none of these, even a kiss is a rarity

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"I find that women generally place a higher value on intimate relationships and need

to be emotionally supported. Whereas men place a much higher value on sexual intimacy than women and as a consequence, and in answer to your question, mature women are less likely to seek out sex with a man (stranger) just to gratify some sexual urge. I think that's why so many men in your (our) position seek sexual intimacy with other other men to satisfy some kind of primal urge that has existed since time began. We want the sex without the emotional baggage and commitment. I doubt that you'll ever find what you're looking for but good luck anyway.... "

I was with you up until the word 'baggage' ....

What most seem to need here is a pro ztitute... So pay ffs.... no one will blame you for it.

But NOOOOOOOOOOO men don't want to pay. They want the woman to 'want' them .... funny old world - a world full of rotating tables it seems....

It was the word baggage that caught my eye. It's only baggage when women want it.

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By *JB1954Man
over a year ago

Reading


"I find that women generally place a higher value on intimate relationships and need

to be emotionally supported. Whereas men place a much higher value on sexual intimacy than women and as a consequence, and in answer to your question, mature women are less likely to seek out sex with a man (stranger) just to gratify some sexual urge. I think that's why so many men in your (our) position seek sexual intimacy with other other men to satisfy some kind of primal urge that has existed since time began. We want the sex without the emotional baggage and commitment. I doubt that you'll ever find what you're looking for but good luck anyway.... "

My thought on this . I read profiles and not all mature females . But a very high percentage on their profile want younger than them . Even if their age range is say open to include me . Plus females which in posts by others many times in forums state. Females can choose as males outnumber females many times over.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Struggling to see how lack of libido equals emotional baggage - it could be down to a range of things including hormonal imbalance, stress etc but also the specific man.

I am not sure it necessarily applies to mature women (whatever age that is meant to include) as women can be mature at 20 and immature at 60.

I would want a connection with a man to fully enjoy intimacy - not love, long term commitment but at the very least respect and an affinity. And.... I have always sought more than a quick shag behind the bike shed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My wife doesn't understand me" story as old as the hills...

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I always wonder what the spouse being spoken about would say about the situations being portrayed.

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire


"I find that women generally place a higher value on intimate relationships and need

to be emotionally supported. Whereas men place a much higher value on sexual intimacy than women and as a consequence, and in answer to your question, mature women are less likely to seek out sex with a man (stranger) just to gratify some sexual urge. I think that's why so many men in your (our) position seek sexual intimacy with other other men to satisfy some kind of primal urge that has existed since time began. We want the sex without the emotional baggage and commitment. I doubt that you'll ever find what you're looking for but good luck anyway.... "

Would say not all men and not all women fit that assumption..

The Op mentioned menopause which is a time of change of course but like all the things couples/partners go through in life it's about open and honest understanding what the other half is going through..

It seems to be some sort of an excuse with some men when women go through that, do wonder how much a lack of communication plays in such reasoning..

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By *lexm87Man
over a year ago

Various


"I always wonder what the spouse being spoken about would say about the situations being portrayed."

Is it an unwillingness to discuss things openly that leads people to points like this?

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish


"I always wonder what the spouse being spoken about would say about the situations being portrayed.

Is it an unwillingness to discuss things openly that leads people to points like this? "

Yes.

I was going to type a lot but it's not anyone's business. But yes, and if you're lucky you can start to communicate openly and honestly before you reach the point of no return.

J

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 31/12/23 12:24:47]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I always wonder what the spouse being spoken about would say about the situations being portrayed.

Is it an unwillingness to discuss things openly that leads people to points like this?

Yes.

I was going to type a lot but it's not anyone's business. But yes, and if you're lucky you can start to communicate openly and honestly before you reach the point of no return.

J

Is the point of NO return when you whinge about your wife on a swinger site whilst looking for casual sex? "

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By *phialtesMan
over a year ago

Beyond the Wall

Get a hobby, join a club?

There are plenty of things you can do in life besides trying to fuck someone, especially if the rejections or lack of start affecting your wellbeing.

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish


"I always wonder what the spouse being spoken about would say about the situations being portrayed.

Is it an unwillingness to discuss things openly that leads people to points like this?

Yes.

I was going to type a lot but it's not anyone's business. But yes, and if you're lucky you can start to communicate openly and honestly before you reach the point of no return.

J

Is the point of NO return when you whinge about your wife on a swinger site whilst looking for casual sex? "

It's got to be pretty close. But it would depend on the woman and whether both parties can be honest with themselves and each other about what has brought them to that point. And whether both parties are prepared to put in the hard work to repair things.

J

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I always wonder what the spouse being spoken about would say about the situations being portrayed.

Is it an unwillingness to discuss things openly that leads people to points like this?

Yes.

I was going to type a lot but it's not anyone's business. But yes, and if you're lucky you can start to communicate openly and honestly before you reach the point of no return.

J

Is the point of NO return when you whinge about your wife on a swinger site whilst looking for casual sex?

It's got to be pretty close. But it would depend on the woman and whether both parties can be honest with themselves and each other about what has brought them to that point. And whether both parties are prepared to put in the hard work to repair things.

J"

I think we can safely say the male party isn't putting in the hard work as he's here without her knowledge. Same would go for cheating women before anyone comes for me!

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I always wonder what the spouse being spoken about would say about the situations being portrayed.

Is it an unwillingness to discuss things openly that leads people to points like this?

Yes.

I was going to type a lot but it's not anyone's business. But yes, and if you're lucky you can start to communicate openly and honestly before you reach the point of no return.

J

Is the point of NO return when you whinge about your wife on a swinger site whilst looking for casual sex?

It's got to be pretty close. But it would depend on the woman and whether both parties can be honest with themselves and each other about what has brought them to that point. And whether both parties are prepared to put in the hard work to repair things.

J"

Yes. I think these hard conversations are often explosive and disrupt the relationship. But stuff like this thread are corrosive and also bring the stability of a relationship down.

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By *nozzMan
39 weeks ago

Norwich

63 to day , loving life !

Retried and happy .

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago


"I find that women generally place a higher value on intimate relationships and need

to be emotionally supported. Whereas men place a much higher value on sexual intimacy than women and as a consequence, and in answer to your question, mature women are less likely to seek out sex with a man (stranger) just to gratify some sexual urge. I think that's why so many men in your (our) position seek sexual intimacy with other other men to satisfy some kind of primal urge that has existed since time began. We want the sex without the emotional baggage and commitment. I doubt that you'll ever find what you're looking for but good luck anyway....

I was with you up until the word 'baggage' ....

What most seem to need here is a pro ztitute... So pay ffs.... no one will blame you for it.

But NOOOOOOOOOOO men don't want to pay. They want the woman to 'want' them .... funny old world - a world full of rotating tables it seems....

It was the word baggage that caught my eye. It's only baggage when women want it."

I couldn’t agree more with the comment above.

Being ‘mature’ ladies sometimes equates to not accepting 2nd best and putting yourself first.

If the males emotional commitment and connection is already elsewhere, what’s in it for me; absolutely nothing!

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By *unchalMan
39 weeks ago

Dartford

Women are hard work. Men are a lot easier.

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By (user no longer on site)
39 weeks ago


"Women are hard work. Men are a lot easier. "

Why I'll never be bi.

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By *oveboobs2000Man
39 weeks ago

North West

Men and women are both wired the same, just women aren't fused

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By *luebell888Woman
39 weeks ago

Glasgowish


"63 to day , loving life !

Retried and happy ."

Good to hear.x

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By *luebell888Woman
39 weeks ago

Glasgowish


"63 to day , loving life !

Retried and happy .

Good to hear.x"

Happy birthday.

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By *arkus1812Man
39 weeks ago

Finedon ,

I was doing fine in my 70s both on here and in the real world, but now in my mid 80s not so good.

Will keep persevering however, nothing ventured, nothing gained.

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By *arcteggMan
39 weeks ago

grays

If you love someone then you can sit down and talk. No matter how difficult the conversation.

Being open and honest is the hardest and most respected trait .

It took me 30 years to discover that

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By *unchalMan
39 weeks ago

Dartford


"Men and women are both wired the same, just women aren't fused "

I’ll remember that one.

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By *unchalMan
39 weeks ago

Dartford


"…I think that's why so many men in your (our) position seek sexual intimacy with other other men to satisfy some kind of primal urge that has existed since time began…"

That is a very reductive way of thinking about bisexuality. I don’t have sex with men because I can’t find a woman. And I would be very surprised if there are many men who have sex with other men because they don’t have an available woman.

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By *arkus1812Man
39 weeks ago

Finedon ,


"…I think that's why so many men in your (our) position seek sexual intimacy with other other men to satisfy some kind of primal urge that has existed since time began…

That is a very reductive way of thinking about bisexuality. I don’t have sex with men because I can’t find a woman. And I would be very surprised if there are many men who have sex with other men because they don’t have an available woman. "

Never, even as a last resort, would I contemplate having sex with another male.

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By *unchalMan
39 weeks ago

Dartford


"…I think that's why so many men in your (our) position seek sexual intimacy with other other men to satisfy some kind of primal urge that has existed since time began…

That is a very reductive way of thinking about bisexuality. I don’t have sex with men because I can’t find a woman. And I would be very surprised if there are many men who have sex with other men because they don’t have an available woman.

Never, even as a last resort, would I contemplate having sex with another male."

I guess the thinking might go along the lines of ‘I’m not a pervert, I’m only doing because I have to, not because I want to…’

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