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If you had 30 mins alone with me…

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago

What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it

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By (user no longer on site)
46 weeks ago

Sleep, I'm knackered.

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By (user no longer on site)
46 weeks ago

I'd tell you everything I know about...

T

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
46 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it "

Have a nice cup of tea and a biscuit. I make excellent tea. Plus it helps clear my mouth out after the blowjob.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"Sleep, I'm knackered."

Do I have to be quiet?

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
46 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

Um.

Eat cupcakes and dick?

(You only have to partake in the former as long as you provide the latter)

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
46 weeks ago

Glasgow / London

30 minutes? That’s barely long enough for a first pint. I’d be telling you to stay for another round.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"I'd tell you everything I know about...

T"

….My future???

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By *izzy.Woman
46 weeks ago

Stoke area

Snog. I haven't had a good kissing session for ages

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By *ruceyyMan
46 weeks ago

London

Sink 2 pints and trade stories and opinions on the wenches in here!

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By (user no longer on site)
46 weeks ago


"Sleep, I'm knackered.

Do I have to be quiet?"

Yes, shut up!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"Um.

Eat cupcakes and dick?

(You only have to partake in the former as long as you provide the latter) "

Narrator - We see Woody frantically rummaging through his baking cupboard for ingredients and utensils as the oven is already on pre-heat….

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By (user no longer on site)
46 weeks ago

Buy me a double gin and then we see

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"30 minutes? That’s barely long enough for a first pint. I’d be telling you to stay for another round."

Exactly…. And the answer is yes

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By *aughty Couple ABCCouple
46 weeks ago

West Bromwich

Just 30 mins?

If it's really good, can we have longer?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"Sleep, I'm knackered.

Do I have to be quiet?

Yes, shut up!"

Shouts- “ I can’t hear you, I’m in the other room!”

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By *aughty Couple ABCCouple
46 weeks ago

West Bromwich

Just 30 mins?

If it's really good, can we have longer?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"Sink 2 pints and trade stories and opinions on the wenches in here! "

2 pints??? 30 minutes not two hours

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By *obilebottomMan
46 weeks ago

All over

Get naked and run round and round the table till we were knachered, collapse on the chair, burst out lauqhing and pour ourselves a brandy and wish one another happy new year

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"Buy me a double gin and then we see "

I’ve got a feeling down south they’re more expensive

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By *ddie1966Man
46 weeks ago

Paper Town Central, Essex.

Even my psycho therapist only give me 15 minutes.

You're generous

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"Just 30 mins?

If it's really good, can we have longer? "

30 minutes, is always really good

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"Get naked and run round and round the table till we were knachered, collapse on the chair, burst out lauqhing and pour ourselves a brandy and wish one another happy new year "

Naked naked?? do you know how cold is it?

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By *illy IdolMan
46 weeks ago

Midlands

I'd join you for a couple of pints with the others^

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By *luebell888Woman
46 weeks ago

Glasgowish

Do you have an apple pie to go with the squirty cream?.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"Do you have an apple pie to go with the squirty cream?."

Eye, I sure would for the wee lass!!

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By *obilebottomMan
46 weeks ago

All over


"Get naked and run round and round the table till we were knachered, collapse on the chair, burst out lauqhing and pour ourselves a brandy and wish one another happy new year

Naked naked?? do you know how cold is it? "

Ok, you can keep your thermals on

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By *ris GrayMan
46 weeks ago

Dorchester


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it "

a microwave meal leave it to sit for 24 minutes

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By (user no longer on site)
46 weeks ago


"Buy me a double gin and then we see

I’ve got a feeling down south they’re more expensive "

Could be worth the effort

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it a microwave meal leave it to sit for 24 minutes "

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By *ensuallover1000Man
46 weeks ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

I would serenade you with romantic song before hand in hand we would stroll idly along a random deserted beach as a 1980’s film style, sexy scene, saxophone soundtrack will play mysteriously from an unknown source, over the romantic setting

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By *aitonelMan
46 weeks ago

Liverpool

Ask for a refund

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan
46 weeks ago

St Leonards

Well, no more than two minutes showing you the places in your kitchen that are better options for storing squirty cream than the front of jeans.

Then twenty three minutes with some low-risk counselling about the whole squirty cream/jeans axis. We wouldn't go too deep in that time. No childhood stuff. Just a few coping strategies, more CBT than depth analysis, as it were.

Then I'd need the last five minutes to declutter from the counselling session, otherwise I run the risk of some squirty cream/jeans transference taking hold in my psyche.

If there were a few seconds left over, I'd say "Woody - get thee to a swingers club in '24".

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"Ask for a refund "

all sales are final

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"Well, no more than two minutes showing you the places in your kitchen that are better options for storing squirty cream than the front of jeans.

Then twenty three minutes with some low-risk counselling about the whole squirty cream/jeans axis. We wouldn't go too deep in that time. No childhood stuff. Just a few coping strategies, more CBT than depth analysis, as it were.

Then I'd need the last five minutes to declutter from the counselling session, otherwise I run the risk of some squirty cream/jeans transference taking hold in my psyche.

If there were a few seconds left over, I'd say "Woody - get thee to a swingers club in '24"."

I feel you might be trying to tell me something

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By *ris GrayMan
46 weeks ago

Dorchester

Yes get to a club if sex is all you're looking for hot tubs are ideal to chat up your prey

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan
46 weeks ago

St Leonards


"Well, no more than two minutes showing you the places in your kitchen that are better options for storing squirty cream than the front of jeans.

Then twenty three minutes with some low-risk counselling about the whole squirty cream/jeans axis. We wouldn't go too deep in that time. No childhood stuff. Just a few coping strategies, more CBT than depth analysis, as it were.

Then I'd need the last five minutes to declutter from the counselling session, otherwise I run the risk of some squirty cream/jeans transference taking hold in my psyche.

If there were a few seconds left over, I'd say "Woody - get thee to a swingers club in '24".

I feel you might be trying to tell me something "

It was all about those final few seconds Wuds .

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
46 weeks ago

The Town by The Cross

Well ..... for the first 5/10 mins we'd laugh n clutch ourselves n say ...... Omfgg.... ! Is that you ? OMG is it ? Jeeeeeeez you are not like I thought. I do love you though. Oh what a fucking suprise ..... Jesus ..... it's great to meet you finally ....

Then we'd get a drink and it'd go down so fast that we'd have another and then we'd say .... shit .... we've got 10 mins left ..... what shall we do ....

Then we'd just say .......well fuck me you are human .... awwwwwwww nice.

Then i'd start to leave for my train ... n we'd both go Ahhhh fuck it's all over.... Oh shitting hell .... so quick but such fun .....

Then you'd say ..... It's spoiled it all for me cos I thought you were a li'l ole lady and well .. you're not really are you ... well your old but you know ..... not a typical old lady like...

N i'd say ... quit while you're ahead Woody and then we'd go ....

Ahahahahahah Ahahahahaha Ahahahahaah

And wave till my train was out of site.

Then you'd go home for a happy wank. Not cos of me but cos of the adrenalin of course....

N that's it.

Done.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"Well ..... for the first 5/10 mins we'd laugh n clutch ourselves n say ...... Omfgg.... ! Is that you ? OMG is it ? Jeeeeeeez you are not like I thought. I do love you though. Oh what a fucking suprise ..... Jesus ..... it's great to meet you finally ....

Then we'd get a drink and it'd go down so fast that we'd have another and then we'd say .... shit .... we've got 10 mins left ..... what shall we do ....

Then we'd just say .......well fuck me you are human .... awwwwwwww nice.

Then i'd start to leave for my train ... n we'd both go Ahhhh fuck it's all over.... Oh shitting hell .... so quick but such fun .....

Then you'd say ..... It's spoiled it all for me cos I thought you were a li'l ole lady and well .. you're not really are you ... well your old but you know ..... not a typical old lady like...

N i'd say ... quit while you're ahead Woody and then we'd go ....

Ahahahahahah Ahahahahaha Ahahahahaah

And wave till my train was out of site.

Then you'd go home for a happy wank. Not cos of me but cos of the adrenalin of course....

N that's it.

Done."

Is it wrong that I read that in the style off Vicky Polard.

*I love md all if it GC

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
46 weeks ago

The Town by The Cross

Woody ........ No. Not Vicky Pollard No. I said NO.

Love her ... but look like her ? NOOOO talk like her NOOOOOOOOOOO

Just No No .....

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"Woody ........ No. Not Vicky Pollard No. I said NO.

Love her ... but look like her ? NOOOO talk like her NOOOOOOOOOOO

Just No No ..... "

Whatever…Shut it ! Why are you givin’ me evils!?! I never even said nuffin about nuffin …

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By *ookie46Woman
46 weeks ago

Deepest darkest Peru

Drink beer and chat shit

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By *oo..Woman
46 weeks ago

Boo's World

Play several rounds of Air Hockey and see who wins (me obviously)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"Drink beer and chat shit "

I really could do with this actually.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"Play several rounds of Air Hockey and see who wins (me obviously)"

You know you’re talking crazy talk now!!!

BRING IT ON!!!

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By *ools and the brainCouple
46 weeks ago

couple, us we him her.


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it "

My back needs shaving.

Mr

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By *oo..Woman
46 weeks ago

Boo's World


"Play several rounds of Air Hockey and see who wins (me obviously)

You know you’re talking crazy talk now!!!

BRING IT ON!!! "

You're going down!! Ha ha

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"Play several rounds of Air Hockey and see who wins (me obviously)

You know you’re talking crazy talk now!!!

BRING IT ON!!!

You're going down!! Ha ha "

Sounds hot!

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
46 weeks ago

Leeds

I like you woody, you can come over to my house and fuck my sister.

The mr

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By *ittlebirdWoman
46 weeks ago

The Big Smoke


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it "

Make a cuppa.

Get the biscuits out.

Offer you a chocolate hobnob.

Quickly finish the cuppa.

Head to the pub.

* There may or may not be a BJ in there too

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By (user no longer on site)
46 weeks ago

Mario kart competition

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"I like you woody, you can come over to my house and fuck my sister.

The mr "

Sir. Yes sir!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"Mario kart competition "

I choose DonkeyKong.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it

Make a cuppa.

Get the biscuits out.

Offer you a chocolate hobnob.

Quickly finish the cuppa.

Head to the pub.

* There may or may not be a BJ in there too

"

Is BJ a cocktail?

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By *inky ChefMan
46 weeks ago

Norwich


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it "

***

Get d*unk and saying funnyish jokes.

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By *ittlebirdWoman
46 weeks ago

The Big Smoke


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it

Make a cuppa.

Get the biscuits out.

Offer you a chocolate hobnob.

Quickly finish the cuppa.

Head to the pub.

* There may or may not be a BJ in there too

Is BJ a cocktail? "

It sure is. Well it contains cock anyway

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
46 weeks ago

North West

I'll beat you at ping pong!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it

Make a cuppa.

Get the biscuits out.

Offer you a chocolate hobnob.

Quickly finish the cuppa.

Head to the pub.

* There may or may not be a BJ in there too

Is BJ a cocktail?

It sure is. Well it contains cock anyway "

2 for 1

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"I'll beat you at ping pong!"

Hahaha. Probably!! and sat down too.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
46 weeks ago

North West


"I'll beat you at ping pong!

Hahaha. Probably!! and sat down too. "

I sit down for everything

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By (user no longer on site)
46 weeks ago

Can we do this in 5 minute instalments?

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By *aurus_09Man
46 weeks ago

surrey


"Snog. I haven't had a good kissing session for ages "

Love a kissing session!

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By *ittlebirdWoman
46 weeks ago

The Big Smoke


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it

Make a cuppa.

Get the biscuits out.

Offer you a chocolate hobnob.

Quickly finish the cuppa.

Head to the pub.

* There may or may not be a BJ in there too

Is BJ a cocktail?

It sure is. Well it contains cock anyway

2 for 1 "

2 BJs? Oh ok then… you’ve twisted my arm

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
46 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it

Make a cuppa.

Get the biscuits out.

Offer you a chocolate hobnob.

Quickly finish the cuppa.

Head to the pub.

* There may or may not be a BJ in there too

"

Hey! That was my idea.

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By *agic johnsonMan
46 weeks ago

morden

I'd watch something really interesting with you that's 32 mins long and stop it at 30 so you don't see the end

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"I'd watch something really interesting with you that's 32 mins long and stop it at 30 so you don't see the end "

Hahaha. That’s evil!!!

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By *agic johnsonMan
46 weeks ago

morden

It would be something awesome too !!! Haha

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By (user no longer on site)
46 weeks ago


"I'd tell you everything I know about...

T

….My future??? "

Let me get the cards out

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By *hrista BellendWoman
46 weeks ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

Have a 29 minute, mutual cuddle and hairstoke

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By (user no longer on site)
46 weeks ago

For starters I'd put the kettle on, get out the biscuits and ask how you were.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"For starters I'd put the kettle on, get out the biscuits and ask how you were."

Coffee. No sugar. Oat milk. ….. I’m fine.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"I'd tell you everything I know about...

T

….My future???

Let me get the cards out "

I’ve not had a tarot card reading in years

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
46 weeks ago


"Have a 29 minute, mutual cuddle and hairstoke "

You have to get me at the right time of the day for that…. Right now, I just want coffee

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan
46 weeks ago

St Leonards


"Have a 29 minute, mutual cuddle and hairstoke

You have to get me at the right time of the day for that…. Right now, I just want coffee"

"Can me and my 3 girlfriends have the dirtiest sex, make love, and put on a show for you now Nicky Mr Cunt? Please?" (eyelids flutter, lip gets seductively bitten).

"Uhm...sorry...no.

Coffee.

It's coffee.

Life = coffee.

Is your name coffee?

I need coffee...."

Right...I'm off for coffee too.

L8rs .

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