FabSwingers.com forum: Wait a minute...

By *eli OP Woman
38 weeks ago

When it comes to Fab and meeting people, socially or more intimately, are you quite patient?

Do you prefer to erm nudge things along because you can lose interest/don't like waiting around or are you happy to be more relaxed (not sure that's quite the right word) about it?

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By *aitonelMan
38 weeks ago

Liverpool

Like a zen turtle

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By *imi_RougeWoman
38 weeks ago

Portsmouth

Apart from one person, who I've been chatting to since I joined, I have absolutely zero patience and I lose interest very quickly! I have a short attention span, you need to put the effort in and keep it flowing for me to remain involved.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
38 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

Oh. I think you know what my answer will be.

It varies

There are times I've wanted to immediately meet someone and the opportunity was there so I pushed for it. There are times I've waffled online at someone for upwards of a year before a suitable opportunity presented itself to make that step to actually meet them.

All things by mood and circumstance

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By *aith SkynbyrdWoman
38 weeks ago

Somewhere else

"Like a zen turtle"

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By *aith SkynbyrdWoman
38 weeks ago

Somewhere else

I’m at their front door before they can write a second message. Wearing only cling film.

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By *or-QueeningMan
38 weeks ago

Manchester

Patient - probably too much so. I like to be as sure as possible about the person before I meet them to reduce the liklihood of an awkward, chemisty-free meet/date. Of course I should remember that this often doesn't work, that it's very difficult to assess chemistry virtually, and that my natural awkwardness will make it awkward regardless of how smoothly the online conversation has gone!

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By (user no longer on site)
38 weeks ago

Don’t take much to actually meet. Social 1st is fine . There are so many that string people along and make excuses.

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By (user no longer on site)
38 weeks ago

"Like a zen turtle"

Positively catatonic, so my

should be upside down having a little siesta

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By *eli OP Woman
38 weeks ago

"Like a zen turtle"

You do have strong turtle energy.

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By *rozac_fairyCouple
38 weeks ago

Tamworth

Patient I guess.

We only meet in clubs now so we have to wait for club visits or events to roll around

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By (user no longer on site)
38 weeks ago

totally depends on the person, my mood, circumstance etc. Px

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By *ellhungvweMan
38 weeks ago

Cheltenham and London

In my experience meets tend to happen quickly or they don’t happen at all.

I will happily have long chats with people I know/have met but new people tend to get lower levels of patience.

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By (user no longer on site)
38 weeks ago

I’m very patient before I get to the realisation that it’s never going to happen, and let it go.

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By *ellinever70Woman
38 weeks ago

Ayrshire

If I want to meet someone I'd suggest a where and when

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By *eli OP Woman
38 weeks ago

"Apart from one person, who I've been chatting to since I joined, I have absolutely zero patience and I lose interest very quickly! I have a short attention span, you need to put the effort in and keep it flowing for me to remain involved."

I think that effort/flow should be there regardless of how long you're talking but yes... being impatient and losing interest quickly probably makes it even more important.

What happens if you can't align diaries for a few weeks. Or longer. Do you just move on? Or return closer to when it could work?

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By (user no longer on site)
38 weeks ago

I can be very patient and I'd only nudge in terms of initiating conversation if it's gone quieter.

Some of the best fab experiences have been the ones that evolved over time. And they have stuck around in one form or another to this day.

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By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan
38 weeks ago

Gloucestershire

Im usually quite patient but, it’s easy to lose interest if I feel things are plodding along too slowly. I do love a good old chat and a laugh but, am a realist too

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By (user no longer on site)
38 weeks ago

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By *eli OP Woman
38 weeks ago

"Oh. I think you know what my answer will be.

It varies

All things by mood and circumstance

You even gave me one of those saucy little emotes! Gosh today is a good day.

Yes, I'm rather similar to you. I've never erm pushed to go straight to the fucking but if things are going well, I've met people socially after a few days of talking before.

Waffling at/with people is great fun! Never to be sniffed at.

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By *heekyDemandCouple
38 weeks ago

Leicester

Will never, ever lose hope of getting Meli, Prey, Quack all in the same room. Not in a thousand years.

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By (user no longer on site)
38 weeks ago

[Removed by poster at 27/12/23 14:28:29]

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By (user no longer on site)
38 weeks ago

Don’t want to nudge things along anymore because I don’t think people like it. I’ve been too patient in years gone by. But I’ve learned after some recent reflecting that you should only prioritise who is prioritising you. So I guess I’ll be less patient. People have valid reasons for not being able to meet etc but I’m saving my energy for those that match my energy.

Ironically my campaigner personality profile talks about how I respond to not having energy matches in romantic relationships and it’s so me.

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By *eli OP Woman
38 weeks ago

"I’m at their front door before they can write a second message. Wearing only cling film."

Cling film? Still playing the long game. Make it tinfoil, easier to rip open.

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By *aith SkynbyrdWoman
38 weeks ago

Somewhere else

"I’m at their front door before they can write a second message. Wearing only cling film.

Cling film? Still playing the long game. Make it tinfoil, easier to rip open."

This time of year it can be tinsel…

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By (user no longer on site)
38 weeks ago

I've been on and off fab over the years.. probably that in itself points to impatience...

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By *eli OP Woman
38 weeks ago

"Patient - probably too much so. I like to be as sure as possible about the person before I meet them to reduce the liklihood of an awkward, chemisty-free meet/date. Of course I should remember that this often doesn't work, that it's very difficult to assess chemistry virtually, and that my natural awkwardness will make it awkward regardless of how smoothly the online conversation has gone!

I don't think there's such a thing as too much so as long as the other person knows you're interested.

It is difficult to assess that translation of chemistry isn't it? Sometimes it's there and sometimes it's not. Maybe approaching it from a friend point of view might help cut down on some of the awkwardness*?

*no, I'm not giving a random person advice. Even I'm not *that* bad.

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
38 weeks ago

Reading

There is a balance. I don't meet until i feel comfortable but i get the impression sometimes that we will never meet.

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By *aith SkynbyrdWoman
38 weeks ago

Somewhere else

If they’re not ready to bow, scrape and kneel at a moment’s notice I forget they exist… maybe

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
38 weeks ago

Central

I take forever, so it's others who must have patience

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By *hriscooperMan
38 weeks ago

Warrington

"When it comes to Fab and meeting people, socially or more intimately, are you quite patient?

Do you prefer to erm nudge things along because you can lose interest/don't like waiting around or are you happy to be more relaxed (not sure that's quite the right word) about it?"

I'm very patient as I Know some people take a while to either pluck up the courage or to figure out what they want.

As long as I know I'm not just being strung along I don't mind waiting, especially as sometimes the build up can really make the sex that much better.

Different story if they never had the intention to even think about actually meeting up and they just want sex ting and that's it.

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By (user no longer on site)
38 weeks ago

TL:DR

Wut?

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By (user no longer on site)
38 weeks ago

Happy to be a

. Works for me.

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By *or-QueeningMan
38 weeks ago

Manchester

I don't think there's such a thing as too much so as long as the other person knows you're interested.

*no, I'm not giving a random person advice. Even I'm not *that* bad.

Yeah I suspect you're right. Try to work out if we could be friends first and see if the WB comes along naturally. And if it doesn't, hopefully I've made a FWOB, which is still a good thing to have.

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By *ad NannaWoman
38 weeks ago

East London

The slightest sign of impatience triggers my fight or flight reflex, but it does depend on how they word it.

If I feel pressure on me I'll run and hide, or become Ms Sardonic.

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By *eyond PurityCouple
38 weeks ago

Lincolnshire

When everyone is on the same page and the connection is there then we want to be like Marvin and ‘let’s get it on’

When people just keep spinning plates then the interest just goes and we can’t be bothered.

Some people like their ego stroked - we want to meet the walkers not the talkers

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By (user no longer on site)
38 weeks ago

"When it comes to Fab and meeting people, socially or more intimately, are you quite patient?

Do you prefer to erm nudge things along because you can lose interest/don't like waiting around or are you happy to be more relaxed (not sure that's quite the right word) about it?

I'm very patient as I Know some people take a while to either pluck up the courage or to figure out what they want.

As long as I know I'm not just being strung along I don't mind waiting, especially as sometimes the build up can really make the sex that much better.

Different story if they never had the intention to even think about actually meeting up and they just want sex ting and that's it. "

this is perhaps more along my line of thinking..

Ultimately I'm after a meet.. also I'm more open to socials than I use to be, getting a gander at one another before either of us decides to do anything, is an idea that's become more appealing...that might be more to do with caution than patience though

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By *eli OP Woman
38 weeks ago

"Don’t take much to actually meet. Social 1st is fine . There are so many that string people along and make excuses. "

People do but... maybe sometimes there are real reasons behind it? I think you can usually tell. Maybe.

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By (user no longer on site)
38 weeks ago

I’m happy to go down the patient route.

A couple of people I met, didn’t happen for over 12 months.

It’s nice if we can stroke while the iron is hot n all that, but it’s not a mega problem if we don’t. I don’t go off someone just because we can’t hook up in the next week.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
38 weeks ago

Leeds

I'm very patient but that's because I have to make people wait, we can't do short notice we have to plan around family etc.

Mrs

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By *heekyDemandCouple
38 weeks ago

Leicester

We had a period in the summer where apart from the odd night out at a club we had crazy on-off shifts, nights, weekends and it played hell with meeting people. We still can't accommodate as we are between properties, but hopefully next year we will actually be able to host at flexible times.

It easy to forget that other people have kids, jobs, lives x

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By *eli OP Woman
38 weeks ago

"I can be very patient and I'd only nudge in terms of initiating conversation if it's gone quieter.

Some of the best fab experiences have been the ones that evolved over time. And they have stuck around in one form or another to this day.

I love this probably because I identify with a lot of what you've typed. Sometimes things evolve and sometimes they don't. I'm not in any rush to shape how things go bar enjoying the friendship for what it is at the moment.

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