FabSwingers.com mobile

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Can you...

Jump to newest
 

By *eli OP   Woman
40 weeks ago

.

trust again - once trust is chipped at/broken, can you trust that person again?

Is it important for you to be able to trust people on Fab? Do you trust easily or are you more cautious?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
40 weeks ago

First

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *aitonelMan
40 weeks ago

Liverpool

[Removed by poster at 18/12/23 14:44:37]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
40 weeks ago

No but I’ve never lost trust in someone.

And then yes. Trust is important on here.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *aitonelMan
40 weeks ago

Liverpool

Context! Depends on situation.

Yes it's possible to, and in some cases you would be better for it. But not all.

Or course it's important to be able to trust on fab, but at the same time it's one of the hardest places to truly trust also.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *wist my nipplesCouple
40 weeks ago

North East Scotland, mostly

It depends.

Helpful

Mrs TMN x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eli OP   Woman
40 weeks ago

.


"First"

Would you like a gold star? I'm happy to give you one.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
40 weeks ago

Agree it's down to context.

I think you can build back trust stronger once you understand why it was broken in the first place.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
40 weeks ago


"First

Would you like a gold star? I'm happy to give you one. "

Yes. Yes actually I would

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eli OP   Woman
40 weeks ago

.


"No but I’ve never lost trust in someone.

And then yes. Trust is important on here. "

You never ever have? You're either blessed or... I was going to say a word beginning with y but I didn't want to do you dirty like that.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *atnip make me purrWoman
40 weeks ago

Reading

No once broken its very hard to get back.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
40 weeks ago


"No but I’ve never lost trust in someone.

And then yes. Trust is important on here.

You never ever have? You're either blessed or... I was going to say a word beginning with y but I didn't want to do you dirty like that."

Not romantically. But when I think about other types of relationships I suppose I’ve experienced that and my answer is no I can’t trust them again.

And I hope that word isn’t young

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uriousscouserWoman
40 weeks ago

Wirral

In real life I do trust relatively easily. On here I don't even trust myself and my own motives. It's very easy for me to become cynical if I spend too much time here.

I find it hard to get past a true breach of trust - it takes me a lot of time to build trust again. Whether the relationship can recover depends on whether I think it's worth squashing down my doubts while the trust is rebuilt.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *avinaTVTV/TS
40 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania

Yes! If you're both prepared to communicate, put in the work, and seek help if necessary, then you can build a relationship that's even stronger.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *heGateKeeperMan
40 weeks ago

Stratford

Once it’s gone, it’s gone.

It will never be the same IMO

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eli OP   Woman
40 weeks ago

.


"Context! Depends on situation.

Yes it's possible to, and in some cases you would be better for it. But not all.

Or course it's important to be able to trust on fab, but at the same time it's one of the hardest places to truly trust also. "

Leaving something open to interpretation keeps it interesting; I want to read the myriad of ways people interpret.

It is one of the hardest places isn't it? I think that's why I possibly hold on too long to the idea that trust can grow back.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ee04Man
40 weeks ago

Thurrock

It all depends on you and whether you really want to. Also how bad was the trust eroded with out being able to compare it very difficult to say.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
40 weeks ago


"trust again - once trust is chipped at/broken, can you trust that person again?

Is it important for you to be able to trust people on Fab? Do you trust easily or are you more cautious?"

Me. No. The slightest lie and trust is completely gone. It's vital to have honesty on Fab as much as in real life. I am completely open with people. I may appear confusing or muddled at times if asked something I have but thought about before, but I tell the truth.

I trust other people 100% from the start. I may not ask questions to find out certain things (are you married?), but that's my choice. As long as what I know is true, that's fine.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *imi_RougeWoman
40 weeks ago

Portsmouth

No, it's never the same.

People in here... To some level, but not completely, as they're not a major part of my life.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *aitonelMan
40 weeks ago

Liverpool

Trust is a choice.

Often a difficult one to make, heavily influenced by fear and pain of it happening again. And yes a large number of people can't be trusted with things again, they prove that. However what stops us from trusting again? Ourselves. The options are already there, and they may not be instant but nobody is stopping it but yourself.

Trusting blindly is dangerous.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ildo_swagginsthe3rdWoman
40 weeks ago

Wales

I feel like, trust is an essential part of the connection with someone. It allows me to feel safe in their presence and completely comfortable with them.

If trust is broken, then, ultimately my view of that person tends to change from what it once was. I go into self protection mode and they become a potential 'danger'.

I trust most people until they show otherwise.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eli OP   Woman
40 weeks ago

.


"It depends.

Helpful

Mrs TMN x"

NipNips.

First you don't bring down the holy grail of baked goods.

Now, when I'm making an effort to reply (which is rare) I get...

nothing. Again.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
40 weeks ago

It takes me a long time to trust someone and if they break that trust then it will never be the same again

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
40 weeks ago

No

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
40 weeks ago

King's Crustacean

Immediate response NO. I would have had expectations of them and put my faith and trust in them. It's not hurt but realisation that they can't have my faith and trust.

Thought out response. MAYBE. It may be the only mistake they have made in a long long friendship - I mean you don't throw the whole dog out in the cold cos he did one pee in the car. It'd take some time for total trust to be rebuilt though.

Final thought. Very much context dependent. Some folk I'd die for and others I can dismiss so very easily. Funnily enough .... there are some I dislike that I could 'be' a gullible fool for. When trust is broken and they are retained for other reasons , they'd be unaware that I was aware but I'd be aware that....... you know what I mean.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eli OP   Woman
40 weeks ago

.


"Agree it's down to context.

I think you can build back trust stronger once you understand why it was broken in the first place. "

Yes perhaps. No, I know it can be done. You've both got to be prepared to listen and talk to each other authentically though and quite oft emotions can seep through and hinder clear communication. It can happen though.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
40 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

Honestly, I don't think so.

I'm currently in a situation where I'm willing to see if it's possible to rebuild once that foundation has been severely cracked. But I'm not sold on it. And I'm annoyed at myself for not walking away.

I don't trust people before I think I know them. It can be built from nothing without issue for me. It's the rebuilding from damaged trust that I struggle with the idea of.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
40 weeks ago

little house on the praire

First one depends on who it is and if I think the relationship is worth rebuilding.

On here I give basic trust thats all I need to give as I'm not having a deep and meaning full relationship with them

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
40 weeks ago

I’m trusting. First and foremost I trust someone. Much to my error sometimes, but I’d rather start someone in a good light, and let them be themselves than not trust them, and watch every move they make, and how long for? Do they have to go through a test period? Do they have to do something specific? So, I trust everyone until I don’t.

Yes, I can trust someone again. Easily, because people grow, and learn, and we are human.

What is difficult to get back is respect. My experience is once you break someone’s trust, they won’t ever respect you the same ever again.

So my advice to everyone, let someone trust you, and don’t ever break that trust.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eroLondonMan
40 weeks ago

Mayfair

Trust is like soufflé. It just cannot be reheated (reclaimed). Well, rarely reclaimed anyway.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
40 weeks ago


"Trust is like soufflé. It just cannot be reheated (reclaimed). Well, rarely reclaimed anyway."

Brilliant analogy

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *mf123Man
40 weeks ago

with one foot out the door

Trust aint really an issue anymore i find if you keep people at arms length you dont need to trust them so dont get affected by anything they do unless it affects you directly

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
40 weeks ago

Takes a long time to build for me, I don't trust easily so once it's broken there's no coming back from it. I've only ever trusted one person completely and that backfired, I won't make the same mistake again as sad as that is.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *issYeuxBleusWoman
40 weeks ago

My boudoir - S Wales

I used to be able to trust again, these days I’ve got zero tolerance. Cut off straight away. I can’t deal with people who think it’s ok to break my trust once.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
40 weeks ago

If the trust is broken/chipped then no that relationship is gone if they did something to break it.

I am quite cautious for my own protection.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *emorefridaCouple
40 weeks ago

La la land

I'm normal quite cautious. I don't tend to trust people, but I do think depending on the situation you can trust people who've broken your trust. Sometimes you realise that that broken trust was a massive misunderstanding and you can work around it. This has only happened in the context of 2 of my friends. Who I thought I wouldn't trust again, but then there were other circumstances that I was unaware of at the time. And time and talking has resolved the issue.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *eavilMan
40 weeks ago

Stalybridge

Yes. I need to believe that not everyone is as bad as the last negative experience. Life would be so sad otherwise.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top