FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Poly and swinging

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
51 weeks ago

Is there a fine line or is it very blurred?

Needing a connection is often thrown about in here over the years, I’ve said it, they’ve said it nobody said it! But there a degree of these things being the same?

I know some swing with nsa. I’m targeting answers from people who need more than just a date and time, but are happy swinging and not looking for a 1-1 monogamous relationship.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
51 weeks ago

What are the definitions?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inacolada3Couple
51 weeks ago

kettering

We just go to clubs and use people for our pleasure, never looking for relationships or anything other than sex x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
51 weeks ago


"What are the definitions?"

What do you think the definitions are?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orthernJayMan
51 weeks ago

LHR

A close swinging friend who’s spent about a decade in the scene, predominantly playing with single girls, has unshaken opinions; his primary view being all single girls who swing actually want a relationship rather than NSA.

He’ll regale you at length on the subject and agrees the definitions of relationships differ significantly, but at heart, it’s a connected relationship that women seek!

As a swinger of two decades and counting myself, I’ve never been one for single girls as such, preferring the couple dynamics, so I’ve never been able to counter argument him; that said, I’ve seen many try on many a bar stool

Ultimately, each their own

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ilva69Man
51 weeks ago

stockport

I find it tends to be swingers, keep their outside relationships to the realm of sex with other established couples, and polyamorous relationships have committed romantic partners

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rHotNottsMan
51 weeks ago

Dubai & Nottingham


"What are the definitions?"

Swinging is partner swapping, polyamory is is having love / romantic feeling for multiple partners. Poly means many, Amore means love.

But people will waffle for hours & make up their own definitions to suit their own agenda

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ellinever70Woman
51 weeks ago

Ayrshire

I think they're 2 very different things

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eliWoman
51 weeks ago

.

Well... both fall under the ethical non-monogamy umbrella so not lying and definitely not cheating are very important - you can't say you're poly if you're cheating/lying, you're not. You're a person who thinks it sounds good and wants to adopt the label.

I think that swinging is more... no feelings involved. A connection isn't the same as having feelings for another person. Poly is ethically embracing the fact that you can have deep feelings for more than one person at a time. Enjoying having that.

You can be poly and love sex - it doesn't mean that every person you meet you want to start dating or grow feelings for. But there's the possibility you can.

I think swinging you're more closed off to developing feelings for others. It's not something that crosses your mind.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orthernJayMan
51 weeks ago

LHR


"Well... both fall under the ethical non-monogamy umbrella so not lying and definitely not cheating are very important - you can't say you're poly if you're cheating/lying, you're not. You're a person who thinks it sounds good and wants to adopt the label.

I think that swinging is more... no feelings involved. A connection isn't the same as having feelings for another person. Poly is ethically embracing the fact that you can have deep feelings for more than one person at a time. Enjoying having that.

You can be poly and love sex - it doesn't mean that every person you meet you want to start dating or grow feelings for. But there's the possibility you can.

I think swinging you're more closed off to developing feelings for others. It's not something that crosses your mind.

"

Very well articulated

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hrista BellendWoman
51 weeks ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

They are separate. Poly is the emotional being for people who can fall in love and nurture relationships with multiple people at the same time. It's a state of mind, not a lifestyle choice

Swinging is a sexual activity which is adhered to any relationship.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *affeine DuskMan
51 weeks ago

Caerphilly

Extremely different things.

They can co-exist. But they are very different.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
51 weeks ago

East Sussex

Personally I think people overthink sex.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
51 weeks ago

I can’t draw a line, but I can say this

Every time I’ve met swinger couples, I’ve had no issue

Every “Poly” couple I’ve met, there’s been issues and drama

Take from that what you may

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ea monkeyMan
51 weeks ago

Manchester (he/him)

I’m a poly swinger, I love sex, I also love easily, they’re not the same thing.

I can enjoy someone’s company and enjoy having sex with them, it doesn’t mean that I want a relationship with them.

The closest reference point I can use is it’s like finding friends; not everyone that you meet will be a friend, occasionally someone who you meet will be. Being poly means that occasionally that friendship can become more, it’s about being open to it.

They’re both under the ENM umbrella, swingers don’t look to one person for their sexual fulfilment, poly folks don’t look to one person for their relationship fulfilment

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
51 weeks ago

It’s important to me to find connections of sorts but it’s not necessary. As a poly person, I am open to and at times looking for romantic connections with people. But I’m not only looking for that stuff.

I think most people that swing on this site say they want connection but they don’t really want deeper emotional ones as emotionally they’re pretty monogamous. Especially couples in my experience. I think people just don’t want to feel used and they want to be able to have a cuppa before or after the act.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
51 weeks ago

I personally think swingers are non monogamous but it’s different to being poly.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
51 weeks ago

East Sussex


"It’s important to me to find connections of sorts but it’s not necessary. As a poly person, I am open to and at times looking for romantic connections with people. But I’m not only looking for that stuff.

I think most people that swing on this site say they want connection but they don’t really want deeper emotional ones as emotionally they’re pretty monogamous. Especially couples in my experience. I think people just don’t want to feel used and they want to be able to have a cuppa before or after the act. "

I agree with you.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ea monkeyMan
51 weeks ago

Manchester (he/him)


"I personally think swingers are non monogamous but it’s different to being poly. "

I think it depends on the swingers. Some are incredibly monogamous and their swinging is all about keeping and maintaining the core relationship, others are less so

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
51 weeks ago


"I personally think swingers are non monogamous but it’s different to being poly.

I think it depends on the swingers. Some are incredibly monogamous and their swinging is all about keeping and maintaining the core relationship, others are less so"

I hear this and was actually having that discussion on a date recently . But I fundamentally think the act of swinging is inherently not monogamous. To me anyway.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *wist my nipplesCouple
51 weeks ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"I personally think swingers are non monogamous but it’s different to being poly.

I think it depends on the swingers. Some are incredibly monogamous and their swinging is all about keeping and maintaining the core relationship, others are less so"

I don't think having sex outside of your established relationship can ever be called monogamous. I hear you about some people framing it differently, though. I think it depends on the position you start from. Plus I reckon there are as many different ways to swing as there are to be poly i.e. lots x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
51 weeks ago

Really interesting replies so far. Thanks guys.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
51 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

I suppose it would be more like monoamory than monogamous.

Some people don't want to feel things for people outside of their core relationship. Some people would feel too threatened by their partner feeling for someone else. But just sex is fine.

I prefer to feel something more than a Wang. But people are different. And I do have the occasional dynamic that is purely physical when the sexual chemistry is there but personality wise we're not compatible for anything more than that.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
51 weeks ago


"Is there a fine line or is it very blurred?

Needing a connection is often thrown about in here over the years, I’ve said it, they’ve said it nobody said it! But there a degree of these things being the same?

I know some swing with nsa. I’m targeting answers from people who need more than just a date and time, but are happy swinging and not looking for a 1-1 monogamous relationship.

"

Polyamoury refers to relationships not sex

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *layfullsamMan
51 weeks ago

Solihull

Ffs I thought it was Tom from Essex post about parrots swinging

It’s all over the news you know

Sorry I’m leaving

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By * and R cple4Couple
51 weeks ago

swansea

I think it’s two separate things we like to have connections but for us that’s friendship poly is more a romantic and emotional connection..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top