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"Dear Santa, Would you be kind enough to bring me a top of the range Bissell carpet cleaner this year? As you may recall, last year you managed to walk reindeer shit all over my lovely cream carpet - the resulting stains which I never managed to get out! PS. I’ve left a shit scoop out for you instead of any mince pies this year and don’t expect any more sodding carrots for your bloody animals; I’ve seen the results! " Hahaha | |||
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"Dear Santa, Can you make me a real girl? I'd be ever so grateful. (There's a blowjob in it for you, or if you prefer, we could do it reindeer style) Yours D" PS - if you can do this for me, could I ask if Mrs C is bi, at all? | |||
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"Dear Santa can you bring me cuddles thanks " Hopefully you will | |||
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"Dear Santa Dont even try it. I'm armed, the dogs are roaming free. Fuck around and find out, you big jolly prick. " Can I fuck around and find out ?? | |||
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"Dear Santa, Every year you have the perfect opportunity to take a few people out, please ensure that this year you make the most of this. PS. I have a list. " To Nando’s!? You mean taken out to Nando’s right??? Right?? Can anyone know this meme?? Please? | |||
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"Dear Santa, Would you be kind enough to bring me a top of the range Bissell carpet cleaner this year? As you may recall, last year you managed to walk reindeer shit all over my lovely cream carpet - the resulting stains which I never managed to get out! PS. I’ve left a shit scoop out for you instead of any mince pies this year and don’t expect any more sodding carrots for your bloody animals; I’ve seen the results! " Very funny | |||
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