FabSwingers.com forum: Dating…

By *arky76 OP Man
50 weeks ago

Doncaster

Dating apps being generally crap, what’s anyone’s go to for trying to meet a potential partner? Moreso if you’re into the scene and traditional apps mainly being for traditional people off scene ?????

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

Either tell the truth on your dating profile that you want to date but have a ‘liberal’ attitude to sex orrrrrr stay on here and find the sugar cube in the salt cellar

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

Fab.

It’s how I met my partner. Best of both worlds: sexual compatibility, and we were both single.

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By *ilybethWoman
50 weeks ago

Leeds

I’ve given up hope

dating apps are terrible but that’s mostly because people are terrible. Nobody seems to want to date anymore.

I could see myself going to the clubs still if I had a partner that was into it too but not sure I’d want to involve other people.

Have resigned myself to dying alone at this point!

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

"I’ve given up hope

dating apps are terrible but that’s mostly because people are terrible. Nobody seems to want to date anymore.

I could see myself going to the clubs still if I had a partner that was into it too but not sure I’d want to involve other people.

Have resigned myself to dying alone at this point! "

This

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By *eroLondonMan
50 weeks ago

Mayfair

I use Fab. I'm an old romantic and find this platform is a magnet for those who are in denial for being courted and woo'd and dated.

It works for me. Piff paff poff to all the other extraneous apps!

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By *ornycougaWoman
50 weeks ago

Wherever I lay my hat

I just use Fab (or Tinder when out of the UK). I have tried a couple of dating apps when I thought that might be what I wanted but found that the behaviour of the guys was no different to on here so gave up and I now save myself the admin hassle of multiple sites. At least everyone knows the score here

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By *weetkitten65Woman
50 weeks ago

Halifax

A lot like here, chat for a while, then they disappear or arrange to meet & they don't turn up..

As my status says dating when over 40 is like hide & see, except no-one is looking for you...

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

Go to Thailand

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By *heekyDemandCouple
50 weeks ago

Leicester

We met through the scene, now a proper couple, it's possible

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By *arky76 OP Man
50 weeks ago

Doncaster

Thanks everyone

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By *reya73Woman
50 weeks ago

Whitley Bay

I use Bumble, OKC and Feeld. I'm open about being ethically non monogomous. I can have loving comitted relationship/s with people with similar outlooks..and am free to do as I please with my body and time.

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By *hippy200Woman
50 weeks ago

leeds

Here. Met my last 3 partners here.

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By *rixie_BlondeWoman
50 weeks ago

London (She/Her)

Dating apps are awful because (in my experience) the men will say anything just to get laid and it can be incredibly painful realising that.

The number of times I got accused or dismissed as being prudish and too innocent because I refused to talk about sex before we had a vanilla connection. So I came back on here, it’s more honest on here.

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By *ilverjagMan
50 weeks ago

swansea

It's not the dating apps, or indeed dating sites that are a waste of time, it's the majority of people on there that are a problem. Apart from the difficulty finding someone where you have a meeting of minds, who is not narrow minded or judgemental of those of us who have explored the pleasures of eroticism that most on here have, and they can get their heads around it, nobody on darting apps come with their CV, mental health history, and experian credit report, so you don't find out about their mortgage arrears and maxed out credit cards, or their bi polar condition, or their eccentricities and religious beliefs, or their thieving kids nicking everything that isn't nailed down to fund their substance abuse, etc etc, until after you've seen the whites of their eyes, and in extreme cases, woke up next to them. That does narrow down the field a bit.

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

"I’ve given up hope

dating apps are terrible but that’s mostly because people are terrible. Nobody seems to want to date anymore.

I could see myself going to the clubs still if I had a partner that was into it too but not sure I’d want to involve other people.

Have resigned myself to dying alone at this point!

This

Damn, this resonates so much right now.

*pours another cup of coffee and sighs.

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By *rHotNottsMan
50 weeks ago

Dubai & Nottingham

I use this site & tinder. If you do your profile right on tinder you’ll meet the right people , kink and ENM is very popular everywhere.

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By *carlet SeductionWoman
50 weeks ago

Maidstone

I've given up trying to find anyone remotely interested in dating. I find the dating apps awful. At least on here I expect nothing at all. And that's exactly what I end up with

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By *apnDomMan
50 weeks ago

London

Just like normal? Through social circles and people you meet throughout the course of your life....

My ex-girlfriend knocked to borrow a hammer. The girlfriend before that took the same train and read the same book I was reading. The girlfriend before was the best friend of a girl my mate was interested in. Girl before that I met on a party in someone's house. etc.

Fabs and dating apps are just additional, from my end, the only real difference between them is that I get to see a lot more nudity before anything even happens. Rest is about the same.

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By *apnDomMan
50 weeks ago

London

"Dating apps are awful because (in my experience) the men will say anything just to get laid and it can be incredibly painful realising that.

So talking about sex on tinder is bad, but talking about sex on fabs is

? Don't follow the logic

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By *rHotNottsMan
50 weeks ago

Dubai & Nottingham

"It's not the dating apps, or indeed dating sites that are a waste of time, it's the majority of people on there that are a problem. Apart from the difficulty finding someone where you have a meeting of minds, who is not narrow minded or judgemental of those of us who have explored the pleasures of eroticism that most on here have, and they can get their heads around it, …."

I find many people on fab more narrow minded and judgemental than the average person. Most people I’ve met on tinder are extremely kinky and adventurous, just not many want to share their man.

That’s not being narrow minded or judgemental it’s just a choice.

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By *rixie_BlondeWoman
50 weeks ago

London (She/Her)

"Dating apps are awful because (in my experience) the men will say anything just to get laid and it can be incredibly painful realising that.

So talking about sex on tinder is bad, but talking about sex on fabs is

? Don't follow the logic"

I didn’t say anything about bad or good. My requirements from the sites are different, I’m not looking for a soul mate on here (though have been lucky enough to meet some thoroughly lovely people).

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By *ris GrayMan
50 weeks ago

Dorchester

"A lot like here, chat for a while, then they disappear or arrange to meet & they don't turn up..

As my status says dating when over 40 is like hide & see, except no-one is looking for you...

"
awwww

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By *tephanie63Woman
50 weeks ago

BRIDGWATER

"I’ve given up hope

dating apps are terrible but that’s mostly because people are terrible. Nobody seems to want to date anymore.

I could see myself going to the clubs still if I had a partner that was into it too but not sure I’d want to involve other people.

Have resigned myself to dying alone at this point!

This

Same here..

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

"Dating apps are awful because (in my experience) the men will say anything just to get laid and it can be incredibly painful realising that.

**The number of times I got accused or dismissed as being prudish and too innocent because I refused to talk about sex before we had a vanilla connection. So I came back on here, it’s more honest on here. "

** Makes me laugh when they start with the prude comments. If they start talking about sex before we've even had a coffee, I cancel everything and never meet them.

They probably just want a wank.

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By *ostindreamsMan
50 weeks ago

London

Dating apps are terrible because the profiles reflect what they want to be seen as and not what they really are. But unfortunately, the society is moving more and more towards dating app being the only way to find dates.

I am on Hinge. They have recently added an option for you to say whether you are into monogamy or not. OkCupid used to be great. They have hundreds of questions, some of which are related to your kinks - Anal, group sex, swinging, etc. Unfortunately, match .com bought the app and screwed it up big time. It was full of scammers and spammers, last I checked.

Having said that, I still like the idea of meeting someone organically. I like hiking and reading. So I am regular at a few hiking and boom clubs where I have had one date so far. Didn't work out though. But I still don't know when to bring up the topic of sexual interests and swinging in these "traditional" dates.

Personally, I am willing to give up on some sexual compatibility if I can find someone who matches me on other aspects. But that's just me.

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By *ong-leggedblondWoman
50 weeks ago

Next Door

I've currently got a profile on a few dating apps. I have a look on there but not having much luck in finding a suitable match. The ones I did matched with don't message or reply.

I would prefer to meet someone who enjoys this lifestyle like I do.

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By *ilybethWoman
50 weeks ago

Leeds

"Dating apps are awful because (in my experience) the men will say anything just to get laid and it can be incredibly painful realising that.

So true. They immediately want to talk about sex, which I refuse to do on a dating app. It’s soul destroying.

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By *ilybethWoman
50 weeks ago

Leeds

"I’ve given up hope

dating apps are terrible but that’s mostly because people are terrible. Nobody seems to want to date anymore.

I could see myself going to the clubs still if I had a partner that was into it too but not sure I’d want to involve other people.

Have resigned myself to dying alone at this point!

This

Damn, this resonates so much right now.

*pours another cup of coffee and sighs.

Shit isn’t it?

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By *Cups32Woman
50 weeks ago

Colne

"Dating apps are awful because (in my experience) the men will say anything just to get laid and it can be incredibly painful realising that.

So true. They immediately want to talk about sex, which I refuse to do on a dating app. It’s soul destroying. "

It's quite a relief to know I'm not the only one in this boat and feels like this.

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By *ineapple_PrincessWoman
50 weeks ago

in the waves

Same here

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By *aughtyPeepzMan
50 weeks ago

London

Pfft the dating scene nowadays is soo fickle. But I'm still trying ha

In between having fun whilst im looking, I'm on bumble, hinge,and feeld.

But It feels like most people on them want to be swiped for validation, or instagram followers, than really wanting to meet for anything. Still hopeful

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

[Removed by poster at 02/12/23 00:39:46]

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

"Dating apps are awful because (in my experience) the men will say anything just to get laid and it can be incredibly painful realising that.

So true. They immediately want to talk about sex, which I refuse to do on a dating app. It’s soul destroying.

It's quite a relief to know I'm not the only one in this boat and feels like this.

I feel exactly the same!!

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By *eroLondonMan
50 weeks ago

Mayfair

"[Romantic Date removed by poster at 02/12/23 00:39:46]"

•

You leave a winding path from the fragments of broken hearts and shattered dreams...

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By *ittlebirdWoman
50 weeks ago

The Big Smoke

I don’t do dates OP. Prefer “the sex” with a friend tbh

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

"Dating apps are awful because (in my experience) the men will say anything just to get laid and it can be incredibly painful realising that.

OMG. The times I've been called a prude by guys who are dreaming about the things I've done and seen in the scene... because I want to talk about books and shared values and life, and actually build a connection and start a friendship before sharing my bed and my dirty secrets.

I'm poly and kinky but I'm also a whole person, and a damn interesting one if they wanted to bother to find out.

I've found a very lovely play partner since joining fabs a few months ago. And at least the guys looking for animated fleshlights make themselves very obvious here and easy to miss.

I used get great matches on OKC and met some very good people there. But since it added the swipe feature it got progressively worse and you have to pay premium to use the most useful filters to find really compatible people. I don't like any swipe based apps, swipe culture is too superficial I need real compatibility. I want to be wanted for more than my body too. And the swipes just encourage that flesh first mentality.

Excuse the rant/essay. I have a lot of opinions on this topic lol

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

"I just use Fab (or Tinder when out of the UK). I have tried a couple of dating apps when I thought that might be what I wanted but found that the behaviour of the guys was no different to on here so gave up and I now save myself the admin hassle of multiple sites. At least everyone knows the score here"

Totally this!! Used to use Tinder and Feeld a few years ago, tried Bumble and Hinge. But it’s all the same - a lot of guys who just want sex, who is married, who pretend to want to date but have no real intention. Plus they are expensive and takes so much time!

And I found that people I generally click with end up admitting to be on Fab too hahaha.

As others have said, either state or on your profile here or put ‘kink friendly’ or ‘not vanilla’ in your bio on tinder and see what happens

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By *ong-leggedblondWoman
50 weeks ago

Next Door

Update, I've deleted my profiles on the apps.

No one really taking fancy and the ones who I matched with don't message.

Dating these days is so hard.

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By *melie LALWoman
50 weeks ago

Peterborough

POF and here. I live in hope.

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By *ris GrayMan
50 weeks ago

Dorchester

"Dating apps being generally crap, what’s anyone’s go to for trying to meet a potential partner? Moreso if you’re into the scene and traditional apps mainly being for traditional people off scene ?????

"
The library or dance classes i mean youve seen the shenanigans on strictly haven't you?

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By *toC Thats MeWoman
50 weeks ago

Sheffield

Just fab for me, don’t do dating apps. Would rather meet people in a club setting.

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

I'm not looking to date so I don't use anything.

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

"Dating apps are terrible because the profiles reflect what they want to be seen as and not what they really are. But unfortunately, the society is moving more and more towards dating app being the only way to find dates.

Personally, I am willing to give up on some sexual compatibility if I can find someone who matches me on other aspects. But that's just me."

Good idea for the hobby groups. Find people with similar interests.

Dating sites are just full of tick boxes. Don't tick all the boxes... bin it and move on to the next tick box meat.

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
50 weeks ago

chichester

Dating as a Trans woman is almost impossible especially once you are 40+

I removed all my dating stuff maybe next year I’ll have a try again at networking socially offline with people the old ways

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By *a LunaWoman
50 weeks ago

South Wales

I’m no longer looking. If it’s meant to be, it will be. I’ll meet them when I’m supposed to meet them and not before, if I’m meant to meet them.

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

"I’m no longer looking. If it’s meant to be, it will be. I’ll meet them when I’m supposed to meet them and not before, if I’m meant to meet them.

it’s how I see it, kind of.

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By *inacolada3Couple
50 weeks ago

kettering

We are new to fab but not new to swingging.

We use this for club / friend contacts but.

Do people use it as a dateing site ?

We are into partner swapping and using a third person for our enjoyment , are there not better sites for dateing ?

Not judging anyone just curious x

And yes my dpelling is crap

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

On match, tried bumble, tinder, hinge,etc,

Feeld was a complete waste of time .

I must be too ugly and have a crap personality ??.

Unfortunately in an industry with little chance to meet women.

I'll keep trying though ??

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

Fab only for me

As crude as some off the message are at least they up front and honest about it

Not fill your head with false promises off the world only to hump ghost and tell everyone

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By *BWLOVER1965Man
50 weeks ago

My Own Little World

On two bbw dating websites

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

Dating is so 2022

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

I think dating apps are worse. I have no joy whatsoever.

But I've given up hope on an Fwb scenario I'd like and can't find.

And I find myself thinking about coming off if the apps and sites altogether and just resigning myself to the wand for a little excitement and trips out alone which I quite enjoy anyway.

Let's face it I get binned off anyway. Might as well cut the crap out and save myself the binned feeling.

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By *orksguy1965Man
50 weeks ago

Howden

I'm looking for a long-term friend with benefits

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
50 weeks ago

chichester

"I think dating apps are worse. I have no joy whatsoever.

But I've given up hope on an Fwb scenario I'd like and can't find.

And I find myself thinking about coming off if the apps and sites altogether and just resigning myself to the wand for a little excitement and trips out alone which I quite enjoy anyway.

Let's face it I get binned off anyway. Might as well cut the crap out and save myself the binned feeling."

Come hang out with me and we can be grumpy together

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

From easy to hardest

Real life / pub club where ever

Dating apps

Fabs

If you’re a guy and dating apps aren’t working, fab won’t work.

If you can’t pull in person, then the apps won’t work

Go for whatever works for you, usually the easiest option

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

From easy to hardest

Real life / pub club where ever

Dating apps

Fabs

If you’re a guy and dating apps aren’t working, fab won’t work.

If you can’t pull in person, then the apps won’t work

Go for whatever works for you, usually the easiest option

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

Met my partner on a dating app we both had disabled children so had that in common highs and lows been together 3 years now so just be honest and you can’t go wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

"I think dating apps are worse. I have no joy whatsoever.

But I've given up hope on an Fwb scenario I'd like and can't find.

And I find myself thinking about coming off if the apps and sites altogether and just resigning myself to the wand for a little excitement and trips out alone which I quite enjoy anyway.

Let's face it I get binned off anyway. Might as well cut the crap out and save myself the binned feeling.

Come hang out with me and we can be grumpy together

I would...DM me.

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By *uckOfTheBayMan
50 weeks ago

Mold

"Either tell the truth on your dating profile that you want to date but have a ‘liberal’ attitude to sex orrrrrr stay on here and find the sugar cube in the salt cellar

And the sugar cube is the one that rattles around when you shake it

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

"I think dating apps are worse. I have no joy whatsoever.

But I've given up hope on an Fwb scenario I'd like and can't find.

And I find myself thinking about coming off if the apps and sites altogether and just resigning myself to the wand for a little excitement and trips out alone which I quite enjoy anyway.

Let's face it I get binned off anyway. Might as well cut the crap out and save myself the binned feeling.

Come hang out with me and we can be grumpy together

I would...DM me."

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By (user no longer on site)
50 weeks ago

"We are new to fab but not new to swingging.

We use this for club / friend contacts but.

Do people use it as a dateing site ?

We are into partner swapping and using a third person for our enjoyment , are there not better sites for dateing ?

Not judging anyone just curious x

And yes my dpelling is crap

If someone wants to meet a partner who is kinky sexy and/ or wants someone to swing with, this is a great place to look.

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
50 weeks ago

North West

I quite like the apps.

I’ve dated off the “vanilla” ones and fab. Neither are any different IMO.

Guess it depends what your looking for

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
49 weeks ago

chichester

"I think dating apps are worse. I have no joy whatsoever.

But I've given up hope on an Fwb scenario I'd like and can't find.

And I find myself thinking about coming off if the apps and sites altogether and just resigning myself to the wand for a little excitement and trips out alone which I quite enjoy anyway.

Let's face it I get binned off anyway. Might as well cut the crap out and save myself the binned feeling.

Come hang out with me and we can be grumpy together

I would...DM me."

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By *olden RatioWoman
49 weeks ago

Buckinghamshire

I came off the apps a couple of years ago. To echo what other posters have said, OKC was great before it was bought out - I'm still in touch with a few lovely people I met there.

For the noticable majority (but not all!) I found that guys on apps like Tinder and Bumble just wanted to get laid ASAP, and weren't particularly interested in me as a person. They would eventually disclose that they didn't want to actually "date"... and that's fine, but what isn't fine is being dishonest about it and twisting their narrative purely to get their own way.

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By (user no longer on site)
49 weeks ago

The way it’s panned out for me is tinder for dating and Fab for fun and general chat.

Both seem about the same with respect to people. If I can’t be arsed not a lot happens. When I put a bit of effort in I seem to get some interest in return.

The no cv, mental health history comment resonates with me. My problem on tinder hasn’t been finding the dates, or even relationships. It’s been finding sanity and honesty.

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By (user no longer on site)
49 weeks ago

"I came off the apps a couple of years ago. To echo what other posters have said, OKC was great before it was bought out - I'm still in touch with a few lovely people I met there.

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By (user no longer on site)
49 weeks ago

Honestly I sometimes feel a bit trapped in some netherworld half way between committing totally to finding someone single and available here or focusing solely on more traditional app routes. Ultimately my issue is there are always always awesome, interesting and engaging people here but on dating apps its not that they dont exist too but finding someone whos all of the above with a deviant side and who I am physically attracted to has generally seemed illusive.

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By *ries AngelWoman
49 weeks ago

poole

I’ve recently split up from my partner (who didn’t know about my fab life) and we met on a dating app but it’s not for the faint hearted! After I’ve got my head back together I don’t think I’d use one again and will stay on Fab because at least you know where you stand x

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By *ellinever70Woman
49 weeks ago

Ayrshire

"Honestly I sometimes feel a bit trapped in some netherworld half way between committing totally to finding someone single and available here or focusing solely on more traditional app routes. Ultimately my issue is there are always always awesome, interesting and engaging people here but on dating apps its not that they dont exist too but finding someone whos all of the above with a deviant side and who I am physically attracted to has generally seemed illusive."

Sounds like you're making it too much about the sex on dating apps.

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By (user no longer on site)
49 weeks ago

Sounds like you're making it too much about the sex on dating apps. "

Definitely not about sex on dating apps. I rarely sleep with people from them. I suppose I just sometimes feel I have in my head a particular type of person that one way or another I havent met yet there or here.

Realise message mightve sounded a bit bleak and woe is me. Im definitely good with things for now just want to find more.

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