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"I would have never entertained having children any younger than I did. (First at 31) I studied, I travelled, I laughed, I worked very hard and had a few tumbles in life. There was no space in my life for children then. Even when I was handed my firstborn at 31, I thought what on earth am I going to do with this little one lol. Still, we muddled through and now he is at Uni and he is the apple of my eye. my other two kids are great too and I had plenty of energy to give them what I think was a great childhood. Now they enjoy being flown around the world quite often. They are also fortunate that they have a dad who is a really, really, really good father. " I couldn't agree more. I had my son in my 40’s. Mature maternity is so sweet. | |||
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"As the child of a father who was 47 (and 49 when my brother came along), I can say it's very difficult to be expected to provide care to your elderly father (he's now 84), whilst being the parent of primary school aged children. Both my brother and I are in this position and it's impossible. We can't leave our children unsupervised when expected to drop everything. Older parents should think about this and make appropriate plans for their future care. Parents shouldn't have kids as an insurance policy for old age. Childless pensioners have to manage. " Unfortunately this isn't how it works out in reality. Parents refuse to make use of care and expect their offspring to do it. I've been woken up both weekend mornings this weekend by the alarm monitoring company. They're supposed to go out and check on my Dad when the alarm goes off, but because they see he has a "next of kin", they ring that person (me) instead. They didn't even go out this morning. My expectations for childless elderly people or those without other family to keep an eye out, is that they are left largely to struggle and don't receive adequate care, unless they make plans and/or pay for it. Needing free/subsidised care is a challenge for anyone, childless or not. | |||
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"Having done it in my 20s, doing it all again 2 decades later held no appeal " It strangely held an appeal to me and I had two kids within two years, which was a bit challenging at the beginning but they are now very close, almost like twins and it’s such a good thing to see. | |||
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"As the child of a father who was 47 (and 49 when my brother came along), I can say it's very difficult to be expected to provide care to your elderly father (he's now 84), whilst being the parent of primary school aged children. Both my brother and I are in this position and it's impossible. We can't leave our children unsupervised when expected to drop everything. Older parents should think about this and make appropriate plans for their future care. Parents shouldn't have kids as an insurance policy for old age. Childless pensioners have to manage. Unfortunately this isn't how it works out in reality. Parents refuse to make use of care and expect their offspring to do it. I've been woken up both weekend mornings this weekend by the alarm monitoring company. They're supposed to go out and check on my Dad when the alarm goes off, but because they see he has a "next of kin", they ring that person (me) instead. They didn't even go out this morning. My expectations for childless elderly people or those without other family to keep an eye out, is that they are left largely to struggle and don't receive adequate care, unless they make plans and/or pay for it. Needing free/subsidised care is a challenge for anyone, childless or not. " This makes me really sad. We’ve all rallied round my grandparents before their death as needed. But never at any point did they ask for it or expect it. They all went into residential homes and supported living earlier to reduce any burden and so they could still have more independence. My grandad earlier this year became a whiz on online ordering as he wouldn’t have us going to Tesco or collecting his Chinese for him haha Definitely agree, children aren’t carers | |||
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"I was 20 when I had my son and I waited 8 yrs before deciding to do it all again for my daughter who I sadly lost when she was just 6 months old. I’m now 47 and just waiting for the day when my son hurry’s up and makes me a nanna and I can’t bloody wait because I’m going to be able to help out when needed etc but with a sense of relief knowing I get to hand it/them back and don’t need to have to deal with the joys and not so joyful moments of parenthood 24/7, because I know I couldn’t do it all again and wouldn’t want too at my age. Also…. The term some consultants still use is really unpleasant… geriatric mother… I mean.. what’s all that about! " It's just a medical term | |||
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" Also…. The term some consultants still use is really unpleasant… geriatric mother… I mean.. what’s all that about! It's just a medical term " Some terms used are quite unhelpful though.. like 'failure to progress'. T | |||
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" I had my son in my early 20s and then two kids in my 40s. I can clearly see the difference, as well as pros and cons of my decision. This thread is a continuation of a conversation I had with someone recently. It would be interesting to hear what you think and please share your experience if you can. " I’m 32 bisexual and I do want children. This is an interesting thread. I’m yet to find a gf to settle down and have my own family. I would like it though. | |||
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