FabSwingers.com mobile

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

What is the first thing you do when you get to your hotel room

Jump to newest
 

By *usman 199 OP   Man
over a year ago

Stockport

Evening everyone

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I check in the bathroom and wardrobe to make sure there is nobody there

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ask for more milk.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Check out the coffee and biscuit selection. Or better still wine and choclates.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ed VoluptaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral.

Have a wee.

Then unpack.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *he Oral masterMan
over a year ago

Lytham

Check for spy cameras.....lol

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

Have a bounce on the bed. Always

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Open the room door.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *rimson_RoseWoman
over a year ago

Tamworth

Test the mattress.

Well, technically, put down my bag.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Then i get all the extra bedding out

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ictoria_1976TV/TS
over a year ago

Bodmin

Check the bed out, put the Tele on & open a beer!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Light goes on, bags dropped to the floor and then I give him a kiss. Finally I sit on the bed and bounce on it or star fish it. That it really

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *unflirtycoupleCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

Check the bed sheets make sure there's no nasty surprises

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lock the door

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *heVonMatterhornsCouple
over a year ago

Lincoln

Drop bags and lie on the bed to rest my back

LvM

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *avexxMan
over a year ago

cheshire

check under the bed some weirdos about

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I stay in hotels most weeks, so maybe im unusual, but the first thing I do is check for an iron.

Sad but true.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *esafinadOHolyNightMan
over a year ago

Belfast

Usually check how comfortable the bed is before I look for hidden cameras lol true story

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

Check the door locks

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *inger_SnapWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

Look out of the window, to see if there's a good view.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 12/11/23 20:51:46]

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Put some music on and have a long hot bath

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I stay in hotels most weeks, so maybe im unusual, but the first thing I do is check for an iron.

Sad but true. "

That to me is the measure of a good hotel, iron and ironing board and I’ll return..lol

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *orphia2003Woman
over a year ago

Tonypandy.

Check bed and bathroom are clean. Bounce on bed.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

I tend to check the room overall for cleanliness. Mrs immediately checks the tea and coffee and moans about there never being enough milk and can I go down to reception and get some more.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Fill the kettle and boil it

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Turn all the lights off and torch light all the furniture checking for bed bugs

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *hePerkyPumpkinTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol

Naked

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ozing24Man
over a year ago

kettering

Complain

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ownwithafeatherMan
over a year ago

Watford

Put the key card in the slot so the lights work.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *he AmbassadorMan
over a year ago

IRLANDA. / Prague. / Cil Dara

Check the mini bar hoping for a decent Whiskey

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Check the kettle for piss or shit. But that goes under the banner of checking for cleanliness. X

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Check if the kettle works..

Sanitize the t.v. remote with a wet wipe..

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unpack and have a wank

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *arry001Man
over a year ago

Oldbury

Get naked

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *iggy5Man
over a year ago

Northamptonshire

Four different hotels in the last week.

Drop bags on spare bed.

Have a peek out the window.

Take a shower/bath.

Pop the kettle on.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

I check the view. Then check how comfy the bed is. Then make sure bathroom is clean.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *osey WalesMan
over a year ago

.

Drop bags.

Check/test the bed

Adjust the room temperature.

Lately they all seem to be set to the stiffling hot room setting.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *peak and SpellCouple
over a year ago

Greenwich, SE LONDON

Probably check for bed bugs now!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Change in to my feminine gear and start looking for guys if I haven't got one or more lined up

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Check to see if the room has a bath Mr

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

As a big fan of Four In A Bed, I immediately lift up the toilet cistern for a thoroughly unreasonable inspection and rub my fingers around the toilet bowl before deducting points based upon cleanliness.

The hotel owners will subsequently get a massive underpayment on payment day!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *4bimMan
over a year ago

Farnborough Hampshire

Get the detector out to check for cameras and listening devices

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *obilebottomMan
over a year ago

All over

Drink the glass of champagne at reception

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Definitely hit the bathroom.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *obilebottomMan
over a year ago

All over


"Drink the glass of champagne at reception "

Oops sorry. I take it up to the room and finish it there

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Drop the bags and starfish!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pull down the cruds, sit on the floor and drag my arse about like a dog with worms.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *rispyDuckMan
over a year ago

Chinese Takeaway near you

Check if the bed ‘squeaks’ lol

If it does I’m asking for a room change, that one has seen too much action & I wanna fuck in peace later thank you

A noisy bed can put me off my rhythm

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *octor ProdMan
over a year ago

working Overseas

Out of season i run the shower on hot, leave the room amd go have a beer to reduce the risk of legionella.

An odd one, but I did facilities management and heard some horror stories from the water treatme t contractors about hotels out of season and legionella developing in water tanks (they all do it)

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ddie1966Man
over a year ago

Paper Town Central, Essex.

Check for bed bugs, then check the quality of the toilet paper.

Anything less than 3 ply, it's another hotel

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ennyleeeWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

Have an orgasm

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *amantha_JadeWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle

Check the view, feel the mattress/pillows and test for squeaky-ness, check out the bathroom.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Check the bathroom.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Put out the Do Not Disturb sign

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Call security to unlock the balcony then order a drink

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

Check to see if there's a bath or a shower, and then cry or start running one for a long soak..

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *hortishblondeWoman
over a year ago

Essex

Check the bed and of course make sure the bathroom is nice and clean

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Well obvs I've got a telly soooooo......

Close the door

Run my finger round the light switches

Look in every corner for a cobweb

Lift the mattress and look for bed bugs

See if the toilet brush has been used before

Take out the shower drain to see if it's got hair in it.

Try to open all the windows

Turn on the shower and check the flow rate

Look for the iron, the ironing board, the trouser press and the hairdryer.

See if the mirror is level with my eyeline

Take all the pillows out of their cases to see if the pillows are stained.

Check inside the travel kettle to see if anyone has shit in it

Look how many t bags there are

Open all the drawers and cupboards

Count the coat hangers

Test the t.v. set to see if it gets all channels

Lift the corners of the carpet to check the floorboards

Run my fingers around every picture frame and the bed headboard

See if any of the light sockets are loose

Check for dust on the lampshades

See if I can hear any traffic with the windows open

Call the hosts to my room just to see if they meant it when they said if there is anything I want or need

Ask them the name of the best local hotel

Place an order for four poached eggs two hard two soft for breakfast/early breakfast

See if there is any mould in the bathroom or round the window frames

Ask for another duvet

Measure the width and length of the bed

That's about it really ..... telly teaches us all the right things

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *otsossieMan
over a year ago

Chesterfield

Have a poo to mark my territory

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Have a poo to mark my territory

"

While your still in the car park ?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

Delightful Bliss

Run a bath and make a cup of tea

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

Wonder why his pants are still on

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *oneybee1001Woman
over a year ago

Around and about


"Wonder why his pants are still on "

Dayam you beat me to this, I was gonna say, immediately order him to get naked lol!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By * and R cple4Couple
over a year ago

swansea

My husband will put the kettle on and check everything is clean and I will kick my shoes off and have a vodka …

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ylonseeker2023Man
over a year ago

Harwich

Test the water pressure in the shower.

If its no good, I'm off!

Put the laptop on charge.

Take off my tie, open shirt and go to the bar and check how long the restaurant is open.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *seYou267Man
over a year ago

Coventry

Check for beg bugs! Open the curtains! Check the locks work and then immediately get naked for a visitor haha x

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *seYou267Man
over a year ago

Coventry


"Have an orgasm"
you immediately have an orgasm when entering hotel rooms? Now this I've gotta see!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ulfilthmentMan
over a year ago

Just around the corner

Go back to reception because the key card doesn’t work. (Every day this week).

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I check in the bathroom and wardrobe to make sure there is nobody there "

Switch on the tv and check the bathroom

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This entirely depends on a large number of factors.

At various times it has been --

dump the bags and go out for some food; have a shower;

lie down for a rest;

open bags to find something specific;

put the kettle on for a brew;

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *orny-DJMan
over a year ago

Leigh-on-Sea

Open the door and step inside

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *r1dayMan
over a year ago

Middlesbrough

Lock door

dump bag

check kettle and have small butchers around bathroom while filling kettle

make cuppa t

find window and enjoy brew whilst gazing upon view(if no view exchange gazing for sitting in the obligatory tub chair with your feet up somewhere and pro_ede with enjoyment of brew)

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *hatsWhatCoupleCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

Rinse kettle, refill

Boil kettle, empty

Refill kettle, boil

Have a brew

Pretty normal behaviour

Mr WW

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *om and JennieCouple
over a year ago

Chams or Socials

Am I the only one who takes photos whilst the room is tidy?

J x

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *igboobstCouple
over a year ago

barrow

Lie on the bed to test the mattress

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dump bags then check bathroom while filling kettle

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

Take her by the throat and ask, “ you know what’s going to happen?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *unner6969Man
over a year ago

Bicester

“What is the first thing you do when you get to your hotel room?”

Wish that I wasn’t alone

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *929Man
over a year ago

bedlington

Check the firmness of the mattress then see if it has a bath in the bathroom

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ulfilthmentMan
over a year ago

Just around the corner

I see nobody is admitting to being one of the people who allegedly urinate in hotel sinks and kettles.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *annessaTV/TS
over a year ago

Denham

Dunno. Never use them . . . . EVER.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *o scandalousWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

Unpack the minibar I’ve brought with me and pour a drink.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *hunky ChefMan
over a year ago

Norwich

Turn the light on.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mini bar

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I look at their eyes....but firstly I think I subconsciously check out their height....

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I look at their eyes....but firstly I think I subconsciously check out their height...."

Wrong thread.... apologies

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Test the bed out

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *uttymonkeyMan
over a year ago

devon

Check to see if anyone else is near by. Yend to get hungry and fingers get restless

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Boil the kettle.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *immy0809Man
over a year ago

redcar

Have a dump

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *unner6969Man
over a year ago

Bicester


"I see nobody is admitting to being one of the people who allegedly urinate in hotel sinks and kettles. "

Ah, maybe that is why the kettle is missing from my room?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

Wonder why he still has pants on

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Check everything out;)

T

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity


"Wonder why he still has pants on "

This wins ..The End

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *lan4FFUUNNMan
over a year ago

Genoa Italy and Liverpool

Strip naked x

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ogNMuseCouple
over a year ago

Surrey

Disassemble the trouser press

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *aith SkynbyrdWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere else


"I check in the bathroom and wardrobe to make sure there is nobody there "

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ddie1966Man
over a year ago

Paper Town Central, Essex.

I don't know about first thing I do, but the last thing I do when leaving a hotel room is remove all the fuses from the plugs..

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *octor DeleriumMan
over a year ago

Wellingborough

Look inside the tiny in-room kettle hoping to find that it is clean and functional, as opposed to discovering something skin to concealed mushroom soup (as photographed in a recent Birmingham stay).

The 'soup' may, also, have been implicated blocking the bathroom sink.

Learning Point: always check a room on arrival and go ballistic if you find it in shit state.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Backwards flop onto the bed

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ustauseerTV/TS
over a year ago

Sedgemoor

Video record of a walk through incase any charges are filed.

I also ensure the kettle amis clean, and the room is unoccupied

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *mcheshireMan
over a year ago

Cheshire

Get undressed and jump on the bed haha

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *obilebottomMan
over a year ago

All over

Pull thr curtains open to look at the view. I like a nice view, not some bloomers hanging on the washing line

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Check for bugs. I've seen Bond films. I know how it works with the USSR and Spectre

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sling me luggage on the floor, set the shower to full steam, have a good refresh then relax at a bar and people watch.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *obilebottomMan
over a year ago

All over


"Check for bugs. I've seen Bond films. I know how it works with the USSR and Spectre "

Do you spray the mattress?

Oops, sorry wrong bugs

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ust want fun 888Man
over a year ago

nearby

Unlock the door and enter

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *edeWoman
over a year ago

the abyss

Pull the duvet from the bottom of the mattress so I can let my feet dangle outside of the beg so the under bed demons can find me

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take my shoes off because I’m not a heathen

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *host63Man
over a year ago

Bedfont Feltham

Pu my things away and go out dancing which is rhe only reason I go to a hotel these days

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *uttymonkeyMan
over a year ago

devon

Today.

Have a very long shower while deciding what takeaway is open near by worth ordering from!

...

Then move the tissues to their rightful place by the bed XD

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Kiss her

Then tell thanks for coming

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wish I could lie on this.

Naked poo with door open

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Check out the bed and full bounce. Then get naked.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fuck me

Do you mean people shit in the

Kettle.

That's the worst thing I have heard .

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *itygamesMan
over a year ago

UK

check the sheets, then window view , then tele

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If with a platonic friend.... pick my bed & put my luggage on it ha...

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

Get nekkid, usually.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *reat me rightWoman
over a year ago

Rotherham

Recently in Manchester - first thing I did was close the door quietly and go back to reception. They'd given me the key for an already occupied room!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If with a platonic friend.... pick my bed & put my luggage on it ha..."

Then check the window view

Then check out bathroom

&

Then put the kettle on....but after reading some comments I'm not sure about that now....maybe I'll sterilise it a few times by boiling it several times emptying & refilling each time

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Get nekkid, usually."

Check the shower

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If with a platonic friend.... pick my bed & put my luggage on it ha...

Then check the window view

Then check out bathroom

&

Then put the kettle on....but after reading some comments I'm not sure about that now....maybe I'll sterilise it a few times by boiling it several times emptying & refilling each time "

Actually I'll just bring my own kettle.... I'll never use a hotel kettle again after what I read here ....

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West


"Get nekkid, usually.

Check the shower"

I only do that if I'm being accompanied

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ust RachelTV/TS
over a year ago

Horsham

Use the toilet.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ampWithABrainWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

Work out how to get semi Decent music through the tv set up.

Kettle on and unpack the earl grey (there’s never earl grey even in posh hotels).

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *lice AgainTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol

Clone the keycard onto a wristband...

Just me?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *use and wolfCouple
over a year ago

angus

Check the en suite or any other adjoining room

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *airytaleOfNewPorkMan
over a year ago

Cheltenham/Telford

Take my bra off.... oh, no wait...

Dump my bags and go for a drink, because normally it means I've had a long drive with work!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Look under the bed for monsters.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Check out the bathroom

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Read the emergency exit details

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *uttymonkeyMan
over a year ago

devon


"Work out how to get semi Decent music through the tv set up.

Kettle on and unpack the earl grey (there’s never earl grey even in posh hotels). "

Ahh yes! Always disappointed with "every day tea" especially if there's no hot choci as a backup or at least some nice shortbread biscuits XD

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *xydadbodMan
over a year ago

Milton keynes

Jump on the bed and do an earthquake test

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *elenaSCDTV/TS
over a year ago

Mendip

Put my lingerie on ??

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

I either eat the biscuits, or complain that there's NO BISCUITS

Cal

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *melia DominaTV/TS
over a year ago

Edinburgh (She/Her)

Check the room for nasties.

Chuck the heating on.

Find a pillow that might work or ask for extra towels to make myself a pillow.

Get naked, shower or bath preen and clean.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ittlemissFlirtyCouple
over a year ago

Southampton


"Jump on the bed and do an earthquake test "

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ampWithABrainWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow


"Work out how to get semi Decent music through the tv set up.

Kettle on and unpack the earl grey (there’s never earl grey even in posh hotels).

Ahh yes! Always disappointed with "every day tea" especially if there's no hot choci as a backup or at least some nice shortbread biscuits XD "

Absolutely, I take earl grey tea bags & hot choc sachets with me for that first cuppa. Can buy biccies at nearby shop there.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire

Check the biscuit selection.

Call down to reception and complain there's not enough.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *eneralKenobiMan
over a year ago

North Angus

For some reason, I look out the window

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *mily36CWoman
over a year ago

Bedford (or anywhere beginning with B..!?)

Turn the light on or put key card in electrical slot ... typically arrive when it's dark

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *idnight RamblerMan
over a year ago

Pershore

The first thing you SHOULD do is check the fire exit route.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Evening everyone "

Get naked dry hump a towel

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *abtastic Mr FoxMan
over a year ago

A den in the Glen

Put the upside down pineapple sticker on the door, wait patiently and never put the kettle on. Rule #1 never use the kettle.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm in a hotel room right now. First thing I did was to figure out the light switches.

Dunno why, it just seemed the thing to do.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Work away on expenses alot so Always lay down look at food/drink menus

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fall asleep, because it’s usually stupid o clock by the time I’ve arrived.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Evening everyone "

Shower, coffee.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *herry1TV/TS
24 weeks ago

northampton

Check all the usual hiding places, under bed, under bottom drawer in unit etc. Years ago would find porn mags, crusty knickers etc. but now only find the occasional pair of knickers if I’m lucky

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *inkShyWoman
24 weeks ago

near Windsor

See if I have a view, check for hidden psychopaths, have a wee, test the bed

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *adgerBeastMan
24 weeks ago

Chelmsford


"See if I have a view, check for hidden psychopaths, have a wee, test the bed"

Find out card doesn't work so turn around and go back to reception and ask for one that does lol.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ussle SproutMan
24 weeks ago

the middle


"See if I have a view, check for hidden psychopaths, have a wee, test the bed

Find out card doesn't work so turn around and go back to reception and ask for one that does lol. "

This happens to me far too often

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

24 weeks ago

East Sussex

Check out the toiletries and hospitality tray

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
24 weeks ago

Sigh...another fucking hotel room

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *WANDTGCouple
24 weeks ago

Borough of Greenwich

Put the kettle on for a cup of tea

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ittlemissFlirtyCouple
24 weeks ago

Southampton

Open the door , put the lights on then kick my shoes off

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
24 weeks ago

That all depends if I'm with anyone 😊

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *aizyWoman
24 weeks ago

west midlands

Bounce on the bed, have to check that mattress firmness.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *verageSausageMan
24 weeks ago

Flintshire

Get naked.

That way, I know that if anyone is hoping to perv through hidden cameras, they will have thrown up and turned off all the hidden cameras in the room.....

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *herrypickedWoman
24 weeks ago

Glasgow

Usually think about how it's a shame in there on my own

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ChubsMan
24 weeks ago

Ship Hotel Weybridge 13th to 16th Jan


"Usually think about how it's a shame in there on my own "

Same here

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *hePleasurerMan
24 weeks ago

Cheshire

Unlock the door.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
24 weeks ago

Brew up

And if it’s a travel tavern get the 90 seconds of free porn. We’ve all done it.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *punk n gushCouple
24 weeks ago

deal

Flip flops off kettle on then unpack the toy bag

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ripfillMan
24 weeks ago

Paris, New York, Hong Kong and Havant

Bag down, shoes off , bare feet, window open

Lay on the bed

Open up my hip flask and breathe

Enjoy the moment laid out sipping good rum - six music on

Ready for a shower …

Bring on the Evening 😬🤩🤫

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
24 weeks ago


"Brew up

And if it’s a travel tavern get the 90 seconds of free porn. We’ve all done it."

Can do a lot in 90 seconds ??¡

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *revaunanceCouple
24 weeks ago

Exeter

Work out how to sneak in another person or two

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
24 weeks ago

Tbh kneel and suck

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *aptain Caveman41Man
24 weeks ago

Home

See if the bed is comfortable

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ustful_LionessWoman
24 weeks ago

Heaven-sent

Kick off my shoes, put my case down and admire the view from the window.. then throw myself on the bed

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *oxy RedWoman
24 weeks ago

Glasgow

Take my bra off!💃

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *arkbigcock300Man
24 weeks ago

LONDONDERRY

funny the first thing i do is get my cock and have a good hard wank

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *itnakedladMan
24 weeks ago

London Bridge

See what the windows face for any good perving or flashing opportunities

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *illhouse555Man
24 weeks ago

Carlisle

Get naked

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 
 

By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
24 weeks ago

Leeds

Put the card in the slot so the electric works.

The mr

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
back to top