FabSwingers.com forum: Are clubs really that good

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

not gonna lie, interaction here isnt that great for guys, and I understand why, so I am wondering if clubs are any better?

Personally even being around too many horny single guys make me uncomfortable, so I cant imagine how it is for women.

Is there a better balance at the clubs?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rRiosMan
over a year ago

dublin

I think the numbers are managed in clubs by invite only for this exact reason.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think the numbers are managed in clubs by invite only for this exact reason. "

makes sense

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Each club and day is different too. Membership and attendance are probably better used more regularly, until a person is established, knows a place and others. There's no perfect club visit that can be magically made to happen. Having realistic expectations here and at clubs is essential for your well-being. Perhaps explore low or zero membership fee venues, so that you at least get a taste, if your 1st choice club has high fees or a waiting list. It's helpful to be more relaxed around liberated people, who may be sexually charged. You will be able to move around, to find your own space

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *orthernJayMan
over a year ago

LHR

As a single guy, swingers clubs can be the most daunting environment ever invented if you’re not prepared.

I’d suggest that if you’re not confident enough to approach women at a random bar and initiate a conversation out of thin air, not confident to talk to a random bloke queuing in Starbucks about whatever subject comes to mind then a club environment will increase that inability exponentially.

If you’ve limited or no experience being naked, or scantily dressed around others, again, the environment will pressure that inexplicably.

Having sex in front of strangers or with others in the space isn’t as easy as it looks!

Single guy numbers are very often limited but you’re plunging into a cohort that’s frequently ignored by couples or single girls; or has major players embedded within it whose experience has been years in the making.

That said, clubs and their chemistry are unlike anything else within the scene; just not for faint of heart single guys is all I’m saying.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"As a single guy, swingers clubs can be the most daunting environment ever invented if you’re not prepared.

If you’ve limited or no experience being naked, or scantily dressed around others, again, the environment will pressure that inexplicably.

Having sex in front of strangers or with others in the space isn’t as easy as it looks!

That said, clubs and their chemistry are unlike anything else within the scene; just not for faint of heart single guys is all I’m saying."

This.

Some people thrive and others sit in the corner or wander around all night.

Effort needs to be made to interact. Alternatively you can post a meet or on your profile to try and chat with other people going ahead of the day so you make a plan to meet there.

A combination of pre arranged and interaction on the day is the best course of action I'd say.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ainbows_can_be_metal_tooCouple
over a year ago

Darlington

Honestly it is pretty much the same as any night out. As in it can vary from time to time. My suggestion is get yourself to a munch and actually make friends with couple without the intention of sex, if the people there like you and you build enough of a rapport and reputation for being a decent human being then you will be more likely to stand out from the crowd

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"not gonna lie, interaction here isnt that great for guys, and I understand why, so I am wondering if clubs are any better?

* Personally even being around too many horny single guys make me uncomfortable, so I cant imagine how it is for women. *

Is there a better balance at the clubs?"

* If this bothers you, you will hate clubs.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *mily36CWoman
over a year ago

Beds (or anywhere beginning with B..!?)

Once in a while you can find friendly souls at clubs, it's all just luck sometimes, right?

I go as a single female now and then, and that's daunting too, but humans are just humans ...so you'll get the good, the bad and everyone inbetween

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *toC Thats MeWoman
over a year ago

Sheffield

As a regular club go-er….yes if you find the right night for you. I go to clubs for single guys. Yes it can’t be daunting for that split second but once you are inside it’s just like a liberated bar. Lots of clubs have plenty of private rooms also.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire

Mint ones are the best

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rontier PsychiatristMan
over a year ago

Coventry

I'm not a fan of online interaction. I much prefer life in the real world. People get a better a better feel for me in person and likewise I do for them. I feel I thive more in an environment where people can better see the human I am. I come across better when people can hear my voice, see my body language, look into my eyes and see my smile.

Online profiles can be a bit misleading. There are times when me and My Girl have come across people in clubs and really fancied them. But when we've got home and looked at their profile we would have said totally no just based on the profile. Likewise we've bumped into people we've seen on Fab and really liked the look of but meeting in person it's a no.

Plus a club gives you a flexibility and removes the risk of being stood up (which is so important when free time is hard). At a club you simply go at a time of your convenience and see what/who you can find.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Back in my club days I always found the guys who turned up chilled and feeling sociable did ok in terms of having a positive experience (which doesn’t have to mean sex). The ones turning up with an expectation they were entitled usually had a pretty miserable time. These things are only intimidating if you make them that way.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"not gonna lie, interaction here isnt that great for guys, and I understand why, so I am wondering if clubs are any better?

Personally even being around too many horny single guys make me uncomfortable, so I cant imagine how it is for women.

Is there a better balance at the clubs?"

If that is your perception of what a club is like… not going to lie but clubs are probably then not for you!

If that is your perception of other single guys who go… again clubs are probably not for you!

I say to people go with an opinion mind and no expectations… almost like a social club but with benefits if you get along with people!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eordiesCouple
over a year ago

newcastle

We have been going to clubs for years and love the atmosphere and vibes in them. But some are way better than others.

So it's not just a question of going to a club as a single guy, it's also the question of finding the right one which will suit you.

Some clubs you have to dress down to a towel immediately, others you can stay dressed all night.

You get a wide variety of single guys in clubs, some are really nice, confident and fun. Others are just prats who annoy single females or couples. Be one of the nice guys and you'll be successful.

But even for couples finding the right people at a club is not guaranteed and sometimes you feel like you need the Samaritans on speed-dial cos nobody likes you.

The best bet for a single guy is converse with a couple or single female on Fabs and find out if they go to clubs and if so could you tag along with them. That way you can have people to talk to and therefore remove the pressure of standing alone at the bar.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Clubs are probably the best bet for single guys because it’s place to properly showcase yourself

If your having a bad time at clubs your either unattractive or not very good socially

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rimson_RoseWoman
over a year ago

Tamworth

I love clubs but you’ve got to go with an attitude of seeing who’s there and being relaxed about what might happen. If you go thinking you’re definitely going to get laid, you’ll be disappointed if no one catches your eye.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lik and PaulCouple
over a year ago

Flagrante

Clubs are great. When I go on my own (tends to be at quieter times) I use the facilities, mainly jacuzzi, steam and sauna, relax and know that I can chat with anyone about anything because I'm amongst like minded souls.

Paul

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

Bi nights are generally more friendly and easier to get to play on the night. I tend to see more single guys in the rooms with couples and each other than on normal party nights.

As you’re straight Op, not much help for you, but if any single bi guys are reading this thread then I’d tell them to chance a night out.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread