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Ways to turn a woman on..

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood

Waving a finger in Their face and telling them to calm down - they love to feel a man is in control and instantly want the sex!!

What else works every time?

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *oldyoudown41Man
over a year ago

caledonian

Spilling drinks over them , I mean , this really turns ladies on .. you can actually see the rush of blood

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.

Telling a woman what she wants. It might not be what she wants but if you say to her "I bet you want to ride this" and attach a dick picture, she'll want to. Women are so easily suggestible.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"Spilling drinks over them , I mean , this really turns ladies on .. you can actually see the rush of blood "

Yup - how many times do they snigger and say oooohhh yooooouuu - now you’ll have to help me out of these wet clothes!!

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London

I’m told sarcasm works. I wouldn’t know, of course.

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

Criticizing everything they say,do and wear is the best way to ensure a wet on.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"Telling a woman what she wants. It might not be what she wants but if you say to her "I bet you want to ride this" and attach a dick picture, she'll want to. Women are so easily suggestible."
exactly this - ive sent you a pic that looks like i have a cigarette hanging out my fly but it’s definitely my dick… now smoke me baby!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Describe in great detail what you would like to do to her, make it super graphic. This works better if you’ve never interacted with her before.

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By *rsMistyPeaksWoman
over a year ago

Essex

Personally it hurts my pretty little head to read too many big words. So if you could just send opening messages of one or 2 words please. And make them really small words.

Thanks.

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Calling us names like Hun, or dear, that really gets us going...

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By *oldyoudown41Man
over a year ago

caledonian


"Spilling drinks over them , I mean , this really turns ladies on .. you can actually see the rush of blood

Yup - how many times do they snigger and say oooohhh yooooouuu - now you’ll have to help me out of these wet clothes!! "

Works 60% of the time all of the time

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood

Im making notes - im thinking i might get shagged to death if im not careful!!

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London


"Criticizing everything they say,do and wear is the best way to ensure a wet on. "

And the phrase ‘a wet on’ never fails.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood

Misty - fuck now?? or too much detail

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By *oldyoudown41Man
over a year ago

caledonian


"Personally it hurts my pretty little head to read too many big words. So if you could just send opening messages of one or 2 words please. And make them really small words.

Thanks. "

Like cave man times

(SEX NOW) ?!

Finally getting the inside track

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By *ortyairCouple
over a year ago

Wallasey

Tell me to iron a shirt as he's going out with the lads... gets me so wer I almost slide of the sofa, Mrs xxx

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"Calling us names like Hun, or dear, that really gets us going... "

Exactly - if the woman you send hi hun to gets arsey - probably a bloke pretending to be a woman!!! Good info hun!!

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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago

Bristol

The clitoris is the light switch to a woman’s sexual arousal, and should be operated the same way. One flick and it’s on.

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood

Even for one of my threads you lot are naking me pmsl

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By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire

Offer tea and biscuits

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"The clitoris is the light switch to a woman’s sexual arousal, and should be operated the same way. One flick and it’s on."

Tea snort alert

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.


"Criticizing everything they say,do and wear is the best way to ensure a wet on.

And the phrase ‘a wet on’ never fails."

Or a wide on

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"Criticizing everything they say,do and wear is the best way to ensure a wet on.

And the phrase ‘a wet on’ never fails.

Or a wide on "

As long as its not Jonathon Ross describing his lawnmower

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Surely a picture of my erect penis over my uncleaned toilet is enough to make the good people of Fab weak at the knees?

Failing that, a comparison to my TV remote or can of drink? Not chilled though, that could make it look smaller than I want it to..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mansplaining always works - nothing they like more than having it all set out in detail, even better if you talk over them, they just go weak at the knees (you can tell by the deep rush of red up their neck and across their cheeks, together with the quivering of the lips and the rapidly opening and closing of the mouth with no sound coming out - talk about gagging for it)

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By *heGateKeeperMan
over a year ago

Stratford

Telling them to calm down when they get annoyed or irate. They love that.

Asking them if they are going out dressed like that when they’ve spent 3 hours getting ready. They love that.

Taking them out and then ordering for them. They love that.

Kitchen and sandwich jokes are always a guaranteed panty dropper. They love that

Honestly don’t rush to thank me

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"Mansplaining always works - nothing they like more than having it all set out in detail, even better if you talk over them, they just go weak at the knees (you can tell by the deep rush of red up their neck and across their cheeks, together with the quivering of the lips and the rapidly opening and closing of the mouth with no sound coming out - talk about gagging for it) "

Masterclass right here ^

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By *abtastic Mr FoxMan
over a year ago

A den in the Glen

Walking up to her and slapping her arse hard. When she turns around in utter disbelief wink and say in your best cockney accent "awight darlin'"

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"Walking up to her and slapping her arse hard. When she turns around in utter disbelief wink and say in your best cockney accent "awight darlin'" "

… if you add ‘ where’s me breakfast?’ They love that you feel a commitment to them …

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By *illy IdolMan
over a year ago

Midlands

Ask them if it's that time of the month? They love that, they're like putty in your hands

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By *heVonMatterhornsCouple
over a year ago

Lincoln

Don't forget to call them a slag if you feel that they're not giving you enough attention. Treat them mean, keep them keen

LvM

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"Don't forget to call them a slag if you feel that they're not giving you enough attention. Treat them mean, keep them keen

LvM"

Would that be ‘… a filthy slaaaag!!’ Or is that special occasions, anniversaries/birthdays/valentines day??

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

One should stick two fingers up at her before licking in a decidedly vulgar and exaggerated manner between them to clumsily simulate cunnilingus.

The recipient lady will be instantly rendered wetter than an otters pocket and the sex stuff shall inevitably, immediately follow

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"One should stick two fingers up at her before licking in a decidedly vulgar and exaggerated manner between them to clumsily simulate cunnilingus.

The recipient lady will be instantly rendered wetter than an otters pocket and the sex stuff shall inevitably, immediately follow "

No way has this guy not been snapped up!!

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By *etefromderbyMan
over a year ago

Derby

Come on guys you should know better surely by now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"One should stick two fingers up at her before licking in a decidedly vulgar and exaggerated manner between them to clumsily simulate cunnilingus.

The recipient lady will be instantly rendered wetter than an otters pocket and the sex stuff shall inevitably, immediately follow "

True that

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By *ady SuzieXXXWoman
over a year ago

Chichester

Telling me how much I am enjoying being fucked!

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By *aith SkynbyrdWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere else


"Waving a finger in Their face and telling them to calm down - they love to feel a man is in control and instantly want the sex!!

What else works every time? "

This, naturally, also mansplaining is even hotter than man-spreading on the subway / tube. And man-spreading is *swoons, falls over, and needs the smelling salts*

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London


"True that "

Now now. Just because that works for you doesn’t mean it will work for everyone.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *aith SkynbyrdWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere else


"Mansplaining always works - nothing they like more than having it all set out in detail, even better if you talk over them, they just go weak at the knees (you can tell by the deep rush of red up their neck and across their cheeks, together with the quivering of the lips and the rapidly opening and closing of the mouth with no sound coming out - talk about gagging for it) "

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"Telling me how much I am enjoying being fucked! "

Youre loving this thread- aint ya baby? …. Lovin it!!

I actually just thought - all those threads about how do i turn a woman on on the forums…. If it’s in this thread….. don’t do it and you might just get lucky

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"True that

Now now. Just because that works for you doesn’t mean it will work for everyone."

Yes it does - all women like the same stuff / everyone knows that!!

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By *rsMistyPeaksWoman
over a year ago

Essex

Oh and please don’t talk *to* me. At me or in the third person (baby/slut/woman/bitch) every time.

I don’t need to be getting ideas above my station. What could follow is horrifying. Like reading or something.

Runs off to find something to clean quickly …

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"Oh and please don’t talk *to* me. At me or in the third person (baby/slut/woman/bitch) every time.

I don’t need to be getting ideas above my station. What could follow is horrifying. Like reading or something.

Runs off to find something to clean quickly …"

Xzzzzxippp - found something!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Waving a finger in Their face and telling them to calm down - they love to feel a man is in control and instantly want the sex!!

What else works every time? "

Slap on the arse or the words, that’s what she said to any comment she makes.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tell a woman you need to fuck another woman one last time before you fuck her.

Works a fucking treat on me.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"Tell a woman you need to fuck another woman one last time before you fuck her.

Works a fucking treat on me."

Could you give me a lift to her place then wait in the car for me??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tell her to put your name in her status

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Tell a woman you need to fuck another woman one last time before you fuck her.

Works a fucking treat on me.

Could you give me a lift to her place then wait in the car for me?? "

Fucking walk!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take them cake

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Question her about why she won't display your verification or write you one.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"Tell a woman you need to fuck another woman one last time before you fuck her.

Works a fucking treat on me.

Could you give me a lift to her place then wait in the car for me??

Fucking walk!"

*waves finger* calm down!!! ( this might be my last ever post!!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like it when they ask you to not interact with them in the forums in case it upsets someone else.

He's a keeper!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rsMistyPeaksWoman
over a year ago

Essex


"Tell a woman you need to fuck another woman one last time before you fuck her.

Works a fucking treat on me.

Could you give me a lift to her place then wait in the car for me??

Fucking walk!"

With 2 broken legs??!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *illy IdolMan
over a year ago

Midlands


"Question her about why she won't display your verification or write you one."

But why won't you? Are you embarrassed of me?

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By *oldyoudown41Man
over a year ago

caledonian


"Question her about why she won't display your verification or write you one.

But why won't you? Are you embarrassed of me?"

I’m embarrassed hearing it

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"Tell a woman you need to fuck another woman one last time before you fuck her.

Works a fucking treat on me.

Could you give me a lift to her place then wait in the car for me??

Fucking walk!

With 2 broken legs??! "

Harsh but fair in the circumstances xx

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *oldyoudown41Man
over a year ago

caledonian


"Tell her to put your name in her status"

I hope you did , always a good way to start the day

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling


"I like it when they ask you to not interact with them in the forums in case it upsets someone else.

He's a keeper!

"

You sure it's incase it upsets somebody else? Maybe just ashamed of you!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rsMistyPeaksWoman
over a year ago

Essex

I may be ejected from the Guild Of Fucktoys for this one… but.

Send me a message titled “Chunky Monkey”. Then invite me for pizza & fucking. 200 miles away. Because we have to work for it remember.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I like it when they ask you to not interact with them in the forums in case it upsets someone else.

He's a keeper!

You sure it's incase it upsets somebody else? Maybe just ashamed of you! "

Probably that too.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Call her a cumbucket and ask her if she wants to be filled up !! How can she refuse an offer like that. Or tell her that you'll finger bang her into submission!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I may be ejected from the Guild Of Fucktoys for this one… but.

Send me a message titled “Chunky Monkey”. Then invite me for pizza & fucking. 200 miles away. Because we have to work for it remember.

"

Don't forget that you have to be grateful as well!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

I love it when a man gives me the wrong directions and then gets all moody because we’re going the wrong way.

Makes me wetter than an otter’s pocket.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"I may be ejected from the Guild Of Fucktoys for this one… but.

Send me a message titled “Chunky Monkey”. Then invite me for pizza & fucking. 200 miles away. Because we have to work for it remember.

"

Pizza….AND afuck??? Jeez someone has a fanclub xxx

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If she's online she's already horny and Up For It.

Just offer the cock... kerching!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood

I think calling her the wrong name is s good way to make her try harder… especially if its the name of a friend or relative…. ‘… ohhhh Tracy….. er Susan…. Yeah Sus… Karen… yeah baby like that!! Yeah… so many girls hard to keep up with names!!’ She’ll be fired up and want to give you the dirty stuff

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tell her you're just leaving work and will be there in an hour and divulge that you won't be showering either as you've only sat at your desk all day.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling


"I think calling her the wrong name is s good way to make her try harder… especially if its the name of a friend or relative…. ‘… ohhhh Tracy….. er Susan…. Yeah Sus… Karen… yeah baby like that!! Yeah… so many girls hard to keep up with names!!’ She’ll be fired up and want to give you the dirty stuff "

This! Becky is now my go to name actually. I have my reasons...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If she's online she's already horny and Up For It.

Just offer the cock... kerching!!"

Standard

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think calling her the wrong name is s good way to make her try harder… especially if its the name of a friend or relative…. ‘… ohhhh Tracy….. er Susan…. Yeah Sus… Karen… yeah baby like that!! Yeah… so many girls hard to keep up with names!!’ She’ll be fired up and want to give you the dirty stuff "

What if they change their fab username frequently? Maybe they'd get a new idea out of you?

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

Tell her how bad all your previous shags/ex's were then she'll try harder.

Mrs

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"I think calling her the wrong name is s good way to make her try harder… especially if its the name of a friend or relative…. ‘… ohhhh Tracy….. er Susan…. Yeah Sus… Karen… yeah baby like that!! Yeah… so many girls hard to keep up with names!!’ She’ll be fired up and want to give you the dirty stuff

What if they change their fab username frequently? Maybe they'd get a new idea out of you? "

You going with ‘ Ida Dunya’? Xx

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Tell her you're just leaving work and will be there in an hour and divulge that you won't be showering either as you've only sat at your desk all day.

"

When they make the point that *today* they will have a shower because we have a meet planned.... mmmmmm

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Waving a finger in Their face and telling them to calm down - they love to feel a man is in control and instantly want the sex!!

What else works every time? "

With a key.. We robots

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *oldyoudown41Man
over a year ago

caledonian

Sending a text after 3 years and expecting to pick up where it finished is also a novel way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Press the magic button

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sending a text after 3 years and expecting to pick up where it finished is also a novel way "

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.


"Sending a text after 3 years and expecting to pick up where it finished is also a novel way "

Why do people do that? The past two weeks I've had several people popping up again. I was tempted to blame it on the lunar cycle but it seems it happens to others as well.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sending a text after 3 years and expecting to pick up where it finished is also a novel way "

Especially when they say they've had no sex in that 3 years.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *oldyoudown41Man
over a year ago

caledonian


"Sending a text after 3 years and expecting to pick up where it finished is also a novel way

Why do people do that? The past two weeks I've had several people popping up again. I was tempted to blame it on the lunar cycle but it seems it happens to others as well. "

Believe me I was surprised to receive that text more than anything else … it took a few minutes to register correctly

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"Sending a text after 3 years and expecting to pick up where it finished is also a novel way

Why do people do that? The past two weeks I've had several people popping up again. I was tempted to blame it on the lunar cycle but it seems it happens to others as well. "

You said no strings!! ?

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tell her that you just happen to be in her area and would she like to meet you in 10 minutes at the back of the local McDonalds for a quickie in the back of your van. Throw in the offer of a big mac afterwards and she'll be putty in your hands!!

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By *ornycougaWoman
over a year ago

NORWAY Wherever I lay my hat

All the above is getting me wetter than an otters pocket. Send me over the edge by promising to fuck me like I have never been fucked before and that no woman has ever left with complaints before.

Let me tell ya hun... You have almost certainly net that woman

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By *oldyoudown41Man
over a year ago

caledonian


"Sending a text after 3 years and expecting to pick up where it finished is also a novel way

Especially when they say they've had no sex in that 3 years. "

They were getting it … but maybe they realised I was normal in an abnormal world ahahah

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"True that

Now now. Just because that works for you doesn’t mean it will work for everyone."

Of course it will. Women are all the same remember?

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *oldyoudown41Man
over a year ago

caledonian


"Sending a text after 3 years and expecting to pick up where it finished is also a novel way

Why do people do that? The past two weeks I've had several people popping up again. I was tempted to blame it on the lunar cycle but it seems it happens to others as well.

You said no strings!! ? "

I prefer ropes …

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.


"Sending a text after 3 years and expecting to pick up where it finished is also a novel way

Why do people do that? The past two weeks I've had several people popping up again. I was tempted to blame it on the lunar cycle but it seems it happens to others as well.

Believe me I was surprised to receive that text more than anything else … it took a few minutes to register correctly "

Right? I was sorely tempted to voice note and say what the actual fuck but I've decided to #bekind. Maybe they sense when you're happy and decide to add a bit of chaos to your life.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *oldyoudown41Man
over a year ago

caledonian


"All the above is getting me wetter than an otters pocket. Send me over the edge by promising to fuck me like I have never been fucked before and that no woman has ever left with complaints before.

Let me tell ya hun... You have almost certainly net that woman"

You home yet … ahahha

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"All the above is getting me wetter than an otters pocket. Send me over the edge by promising to fuck me like I have never been fucked before and that no woman has ever left with complaints before.

Let me tell ya hun... You have almost certainly net that woman"

Took your time now get over here while i have a rummage in Your undercrackers Guessing that might have pushed you into ‘wet floor’ territory

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling

It turns out I don't actually have to do anything. It just happens. It is a gift

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By *oldyoudown41Man
over a year ago

caledonian


"Sending a text after 3 years and expecting to pick up where it finished is also a novel way

Why do people do that? The past two weeks I've had several people popping up again. I was tempted to blame it on the lunar cycle but it seems it happens to others as well.

Believe me I was surprised to receive that text more than anything else … it took a few minutes to register correctly

Right? I was sorely tempted to voice note and say what the actual fuck but I've decided to #bekind. Maybe they sense when you're happy and decide to add a bit of chaos to your life. "

I entertained the idea and wanted more against my better judgment but I know she’ll only lead me on again and disappear .. funny world

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By *eyond PurityCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

C loves it when they automatically discount me in their message - also ruining any chance of ever meeting anyway…

When they say things ‘I’d love to shove my dick down your throat’ - this is when I reply that it’s weird that it says they are straight on your profile

K

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"C loves it when they automatically discount me in their message - also ruining any chance of ever meeting anyway…

When they say things ‘I’d love to shove my dick down your throat’ - this is when I reply that it’s weird that it says they are straight on your profile

K"

Id like to shove my……. Throat…. While handing K a beer!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

offer her a date with wonko

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ruceyyMan
over a year ago

London

Telling them they are just a hot little fuck to me has worked....once.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"offer her a date with wonko"

sorry thats a major turn off

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *tanley FunseekerMan
over a year ago

stanley

I find catcalls, wolf whistles and making suggestive hand/body movements will have all women wetter than an otters pocket instantly.

Objectification is like cat nip to them, they simply can’t resist

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Spilling drinks over them , I mean , this really turns ladies on .. you can actually see the rush of blood "

I done this and she went to the restaurant bathroom it’s now been 25 minutes and she’s not back is she getting ready for me??

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"Spilling drinks over them , I mean , this really turns ladies on .. you can actually see the rush of blood

I done this and she went to the restaurant bathroom it’s now been 25 minutes and she’s not back is she getting ready for me??"

She’ll be in the stalls wondering whats taking you so long i think!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Spilling drinks over them , I mean , this really turns ladies on .. you can actually see the rush of blood

I done this and she went to the restaurant bathroom it’s now been 25 minutes and she’s not back is she getting ready for me??

She’ll be in the stalls wondering whats taking you so long i think!! "

Let me check I’ll keep you updated

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Waving a finger in Their face and telling them to calm down - they love to feel a man is in control and instantly want the sex!!

What else works every time?

This, naturally, also mansplaining is even hotter than man-spreading on the subway / tube. And man-spreading is *swoons, falls over, and needs the smelling salts*

"

I'd forgotten the man spreading. I shall go and do that next time I head in to London, I love it when a lady swoons, especially when she falls face forward into my lap. That way there is no need for smelling salts and she can also indulge her lust by giving me a bj

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"Waving a finger in Their face and telling them to calm down - they love to feel a man is in control and instantly want the sex!!

What else works every time?

This, naturally, also mansplaining is even hotter than man-spreading on the subway / tube. And man-spreading is *swoons, falls over, and needs the smelling salts*

I'd forgotten the man spreading. I shall go and do that next time I head in to London, I love it when a lady swoons, especially when she falls face forward into my lap. That way there is no need for smelling salts and she can also indulge her lust by giving me a bj "

Why was I hearing Sade ‘ Smooth Operator!’ Reading this post

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Waving a finger in Their face and telling them to calm down - they love to feel a man is in control and instantly want the sex!!

What else works every time?

This, naturally, also mansplaining is even hotter than man-spreading on the subway / tube. And man-spreading is *swoons, falls over, and needs the smelling salts*

I'd forgotten the man spreading. I shall go and do that next time I head in to London, I love it when a lady swoons, especially when she falls face forward into my lap. That way there is no need for smelling salts and she can also indulge her lust by giving me a bj

Why was I hearing Sade ‘ Smooth Operator!’ Reading this post "

I have followed the instructions in your manual Todge. I have tried to emulate the master!

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By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Dorchester

Flick a switch

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By *aith SkynbyrdWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere else


"Tell her how bad all your previous shags/ex's were then she'll try harder.

Mrs "

Or tell her how GOOD they were, describe in detail, make sure to praise her for her effort in the most condescending way possible.

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By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Dorchester


"Tell her how bad all your previous shags/ex's were then she'll try harder.

Mrs

Or tell her how GOOD they were, describe in detail, make sure to praise her for her effort in the most condescending way possible."
nope never never discuss previous encounters

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *aith SkynbyrdWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere else


"Waving a finger in Their face and telling them to calm down - they love to feel a man is in control and instantly want the sex!!

What else works every time?

This, naturally, also mansplaining is even hotter than man-spreading on the subway / tube. And man-spreading is *swoons, falls over, and needs the smelling salts*

I'd forgotten the man spreading. I shall go and do that next time I head in to London, I love it when a lady swoons, especially when she falls face forward into my lap. That way there is no need for smelling salts and she can also indulge her lust by giving me a bj "

YES! We all have orgasms while we’re giving head, no stimulation of our own bits is necessary. We get caught up in the throes of being subservient to whatever your little heart desires.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Dorchester


"Waving a finger in Their face and telling them to calm down - they love to feel a man is in control and instantly want the sex!!

What else works every time?

This, naturally, also mansplaining is even hotter than man-spreading on the subway / tube. And man-spreading is *swoons, falls over, and needs the smelling salts*

I'd forgotten the man spreading. I shall go and do that next time I head in to London, I love it when a lady swoons, especially when she falls face forward into my lap. That way there is no need for smelling salts and she can also indulge her lust by giving me a bj

YES! We all have orgasms while we’re giving head, no stimulation of our own bits is necessary. We get caught up in the throes of being subservient to whatever your little heart desires."
lol

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *aith SkynbyrdWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere else

Also ,be angry and moody all the time. Yell at her. That way she’ll know you care.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.


"Also ,be angry and moody all the time. Yell at her. That way she’ll know you care."

Wait being a moody bastard isn't a natural aphrodisiac?

Damn that's where I'm going wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Send her a picture of your manhood preferably over the toilet. If you can also fit a can of Lynx/Sky remote and your grubby unkept nails in the photo as well she'll instantly be moist for you!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"Also ,be angry and moody all the time. Yell at her. That way she’ll know you care."

I feel a little Cilla on this thread…. Can see love blossoming through the posts!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asty tatsyMan
over a year ago

london

They absolute love it when you finally meet and you get everything you want then ghost themfor 4 weeks and send them a message saying

“ sorry been sooo busy how are you? Do you think we can have round 2 this week?” I can tell how many get super wet

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"Waving a finger in Their face and telling them to calm down - they love to feel a man is in control and instantly want the sex!!

What else works every time?

This, naturally, also mansplaining is even hotter than man-spreading on the subway / tube. And man-spreading is *swoons, falls over, and needs the smelling salts*

I'd forgotten the man spreading. I shall go and do that next time I head in to London, I love it when a lady swoons, especially when she falls face forward into my lap. That way there is no need for smelling salts and she can also indulge her lust by giving me a bj

Why was I hearing Sade ‘ Smooth Operator!’ Reading this post

I have followed the instructions in your manual Todge. I have tried to emulate the master! "

Thanks HK Im still a student … never stop learning new ways to turn a woman on - as I get older I hear the thought of me dying is exciting…. Probably because they all want a go before I go - bit like the January sales…. Get Todger now because when hes gone…. Hes gone!!!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *inky ChefMan
over a year ago

Norwich

Always wear socks during sex.

Never lick pussy, because women actually don't like that.

They love average guys secretly.

The only reason they don't act on it, because average guys are not cool enough.

Appeanrly too many showers aren't good either.

Something like when you defrost sea food under cold water.

Washing the taste off.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Waving a finger in Their face and telling them to calm down - they love to feel a man is in control and instantly want the sex!!

What else works every time?

This, naturally, also mansplaining is even hotter than man-spreading on the subway / tube. And man-spreading is *swoons, falls over, and needs the smelling salts*

I'd forgotten the man spreading. I shall go and do that next time I head in to London, I love it when a lady swoons, especially when she falls face forward into my lap. That way there is no need for smelling salts and she can also indulge her lust by giving me a bj

YES! We all have orgasms while we’re giving head, no stimulation of our own bits is necessary. We get caught up in the throes of being subservient to whatever your little heart desires."

Just stop it - you're only encouraging me!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

When I wear my grey socks with sandals with my pasty White legs in the summer I'm literally hiding for cover trying to fend off horny people trying to get with me.

So I would say if you want to make em horny that's how.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ust RachelTV/TS
over a year ago

Horsham


"The clitoris is the light switch to a woman’s sexual arousal, and should be operated the same way. One flick and it’s on."

What happens if you have remote controlled lights, without a switch?

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rsMistyPeaksWoman
over a year ago

Essex


"The clitoris is the light switch to a woman’s sexual arousal, and should be operated the same way. One flick and it’s on.

What happens if you have remote controlled lights, without a switch?"

Alexa - turn my bitch on

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Send her a picture of your manhood preferably over the toilet. If you can also fit a can of Lynx/Sky remote and your grubby unkept nails in the photo as well she'll instantly be moist for you!!"

Just had that delight sent to me. Such a turn on is a toilet pic I mean really guys is a cock shot over your toilet bowl the best you lazy toads can do.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The clitoris is the light switch to a woman’s sexual arousal, and should be operated the same way. One flick and it’s on.

What happens if you have remote controlled lights, without a switch?

Alexa - turn my bitch on"

Oh the clit is now lit

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Also ,be angry and moody all the time. Yell at her. That way she’ll know you care."

Exactly this.. We love a good rant before sex. Helps with foreplay

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Spilling drinks over them , I mean , this really turns ladies on .. you can actually see the rush of blood

Yup - how many times do they snigger and say oooohhh yooooouuu - now you’ll have to help me out of these wet clothes!! "

No. Send you to come clean up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A message that says

Hey honey bun

You take my breath away every time you get close to me.

Running your fingers and thoughts across my mind.

Giss us a shag you tart.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *imeAfterTimeCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

Not sure how true this is, but apparently ladies will cum instantly if you fart while in a 69

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *inky ChefMan
over a year ago

Norwich


"A message that says

Hey honey bun

You take my breath away every time you get close to me.

Running your fingers and thoughts across my mind.

Giss us a shag you tart. "

How about:

" Yo

How's you

Free now

Wanna f*ck

What's the address

Hung here give me a lift baby"

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"Spilling drinks over them , I mean , this really turns ladies on .. you can actually see the rush of blood

Yup - how many times do they snigger and say oooohhh yooooouuu - now you’ll have to help me out of these wet clothes!!

No. Send you to come clean up"

You saucy minx - you’re insatiable!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *elvet AngelWoman
over a year ago

Newton Abbot

Don't consider foreplay at all - ever.

Women don't like it!

A smack on her arse and a "Kneel up love, footie's on in 5 minutes" will have her wet and desperate for you.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Demand to know why she isn't in the kitchen and a sandwich hasn't appeared on your lap.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you're married or in a relationship, cheat on her then see how much she wants the sex with you! If she doesn't complain you aren't getting any.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *eally_RosieWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

You should absolutely tell her that her age preferences are wrong, and list as many reasons as possible as to why you’re the exception. Bonus points if you accompany that with several explicit pictures she didn’t ask for.

Makes me wetter than an otter’s pocket just thinking about it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You can X/Y/Z if ya want.

Always makes the little ladies feel special you've been so permissive to allow them the freedom they so rightly deserved at your whim.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You should ask my mum how to ....

You're almost as good looking as your sister.

You're always ovary acting.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ycanNightsMan
over a year ago

Workington

Tell them your balls are heavy?

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling


"Tell them your balls are heavy? "

Palms are sweaty, knees weak, balls are heavy

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tell them how you would like to ride their mum until her kidney bursts

Gets them so hot!!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Tell them your balls are heavy?

Palms are sweaty, knees weak, balls are heavy"

Take me now, I can't wait any longer.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tell them you are in love with them.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ask what she’s wearing. Constantly.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling


"Tell them your balls are heavy?

Palms are sweaty, knees weak, balls are heavy

Take me now, I can't wait any longer."

Yes! I knew it would work.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ddie1966Man
over a year ago

Paper Town Central, Essex.

Ask her to help you have a pee as the doctor says you shouldn't lift anything heavy and localised rigormortice seems to be setting in.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Tell them your balls are heavy?

Palms are sweaty, knees weak, balls are heavy

Take me now, I can't wait any longer.

Yes! I knew it would work. "

I'm in the car already

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *cousedave99Man
over a year ago

premier inn, fleet

[Removed by poster at 06/11/23 18:49:30]

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *cousedave99Man
over a year ago

premier inn, fleet

Have a bet with her that she is not as good a fuck as her mother!

Otters pocket time ????

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Waving a finger in Their face and telling them to calm down - they love to feel a man is in control and instantly want the sex!!

What else works every time? "

Oh I LOOOOVVVEEEE being messaged, just a couple of words, like do you suck cock. Then a week later they message again just to make sure I got the message and they keep going and going and going and going. Preservence with several messages with no encouragement is sooooo sexy!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

Take the bins in.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

[Removed by poster at 06/11/23 19:00:33]

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *lways BeardedMan
over a year ago

Wetherby

Easy! One word...

Helicopter!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Send her a couple of "action shots" of you with various other women and ask her if she'd like to be next!! Once she knows that she'll be another notch on your bedpost then she'll be gagging for it!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *hePerkyPumpkinTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol

Wave your empty beer can at it until it goes to the fridge to get you a new one

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish

Ask her opinion on something and then tell her she's wrong

J

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ask her opinion on something and then tell her she's wrong

J"

Don't forget to tell her to calm down first!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *oo..Woman
over a year ago

Boo's World

Close the door on your way out

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *opinovMan
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

Breaking wind and following through during 69, especially if she's below.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *oldyoudown41Man
over a year ago

caledonian


"Tell them you are in love with them.

"

I always do , explains a lot

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

How about being a good conversationalist (does not have to be high brow)?

Being attentive listener to to the topics she would like to talk about? (Does not require much other than listening and understanding what she is telling you and responding to THAT?)

Being ok with the idea of it just being a social without expecting.....

Just wondering

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMoore OP   Man
over a year ago

Fulwood


"How about being a good conversationalist (does not have to be high brow)?

Being attentive listener to to the topics she would like to talk about? (Does not require much other than listening and understanding what she is telling you and responding to THAT?)

Being ok with the idea of it just being a social without expecting.....

Just wondering

"

Apologies - i have nomidea hiw this poster got On my thread!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

Seductively eat toast in bed. Bonus marks for splodging jam on the pillows

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"How about being a good conversationalist (does not have to be high brow)?

Being attentive listener to to the topics she would like to talk about? (Does not require much other than listening and understanding what she is telling you and responding to THAT?)

Being ok with the idea of it just being a social without expecting.....

Just wondering

Apologies - i have nomidea hiw this poster got On my thread!! "
Nor me

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
over a year ago

chichester

Treat her to a blow out on temu/ shein shopping haul

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Give her an STI, and a bunch of flowers

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Covent Garden


"Personally it hurts my pretty little head to read too many big words. So if you could just send opening messages of one or 2 words please. And make them really small words.

Thanks. "

•

Does that mean you're not attracted to sesquipedalians?

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *esafinadOHolyNightMan
over a year ago

Belfast


"Give her an STI, and a bunch of flowers"

Spank her with a copy of Good Housekeeping before handing her the marigolds

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *illy IdolMan
over a year ago

Midlands


"Give her an STI, and a bunch of flowers"

You whish!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asterR and slut mayaMan
over a year ago

Bradford


"Give her an STI, and a bunch of flowers

Spank her with a copy of Good Housekeeping before handing her the marigolds "

Man after my own heart lol

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *obilebottomMan
over a year ago

All over

Chocolate and cake

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do the dishes, cook. Clean

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do the washing up

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By *exysoul888TV/TS
over a year ago

Newcastle

I'm surprised no one has mentioned pulling her pigtails... Worked when I was in primary lol

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Do the washing up "

Oooo yes, gets me so wet seeing a man elbow deep in dirty dishes

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *mily36CWoman
over a year ago

Beds (or anywhere beginning with B..!?)

Tell her all about your bad day at work and don't even stop for air ...then ask 'what's for dinner?'

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *mily36CWoman
over a year ago

Beds (or anywhere beginning with B..!?)


"Tell her all about your bad day at work and don't even stop for air ...then ask 'what's for dinner?' "

No wait sorry, it's the age old strip and leave your socks on...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *illy IdolMan
over a year ago

Midlands

Tell her how tired you are when you get in and ask why none of the housework has been done

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"offer her a date with wonko

sorry thats a major turn off

"

I see you no one corrected me

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago

Peterborough

Ask her "Who's your pretty friend?" Nowt like the green eyed monster to get her juices flowing and cogs turning.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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